Starting Over

Spring 1981

The party was almost over. It was official.

James Potter was 22.

It had been a success. James had been thoroughly surprised, Remus was certain. There had been so much going on recently, secret work for the Order that no one was supposed to know about. That no one was supposed to talk about.

Things were getting dangerous, and James and Lily had a knack for getting into situations where... well, Remus thought to himself, there were a few too many close calls. And now they had Harry to think about. Good lord, they had gone and made Sirius his godfather. Remus chuckled. He couldn't imagine Sirius guardian of a plant, much less a child.

Someone was playing music. The food was sitting heavily in the stomachs of the guests that crowded into the Potter's garden. The chairs outside were pushed to the sides to make room for dancing. He saw James and Lily, the two of them dancing, looking happier than Remus had ever seen them. Hmm, he thought to himself. Good for them.

He saw Peter and Dumbledore, chatting up a storm. Hope it wasn't Order business, Remus thought to himself. He didn't want to think about the War tonight. He had just recently returned from his last assignment, and was not inclined to be sent anywhere else for a while.

His eyes searched over the tables. Where was he?

He always seemed to be looking for Sirius.

Remus smiled to himself. Surely some relation of James had cornered him - they were always trying to set him up with their daughters, nieces, cousins. No, there he was, sitting at a table with some former players from the Gryffindor Quidditch team, turning this into a mini reunion. Any chance to get together to reminisce about their glory days, he scoffed to himself.

As if he heard him, Sirius lifted his head at that moment. He locked eyes with Remus, tilted his head to the right a little, as if to say, 'Come get me out of here, will ya?'

Remus lifted one eyebrow, shook his head just a little, and walked around the corner of the house. The sun had just set, the sky exploding in colours, pink, peach, indigo, blue. Remus suddenly wished he had rescued Sirius, wished he were there to look at this with him.

Whoever had the record player must have been Muggle born - they were playing a combination of Muggle and Wizarding music.

Ah, John Lennon. Remus liked him very much.

Our life together is so precious together

We have grown, we have grown

Although our love is still special

Let's take a chance and fly away somewhere

Remus felt someone behind him.

"It's been too long since we took the time, no one's to blame, I know time flies so quickly," he heard Sirius sing.

He smiled. But before he could turn around, he had arms around him, holding him tightly. Someone whispering in his ear.

"But when I see you darling,"

"Sirius..." Hot breath on his neck.

"It's like we both are falling in love,"

"Padfoot..." he said, a little more insistently.

Sirius turned him around, nuzzling his neck. His arms slid around Remus' back, pulling him closer. "Again, it will be just like-"

Remus kissed him, once, gently. Sirius stopped singing long enough for Remus to feel soft lips touching his, kissing him back, smiling, laughing.

They were dancing now. Well, if you call Sirius grinding his pelvis into him dancing, then yes, they were dancing.

"Everyday we used to make it love, why can't we be making love nice and easy."

"This is obscene, you know."

He continued singing, ignoring Remus.

"It's time to spread our wings and fly," Remus looked up into incredibly blue eyes, "don't let another day go by," - kiss - "my love," - kiss - "it'll be just like starting over."

Remus let out a laugh, holding Sirius as close as he could, put his head on the taller man's shoulder and closed his eyes. "I've missed you, Padfoot," said Remus. They leaned into each other, hands exploring, darting under each other's shirts, seeking the warmth of skin, of contact.

Sirius began to sing again. "It's been too long since we took the time, no one's to blame, I know time flies so quickly."

Remus nodded to himself. It was true, time was flying. They hadn't had much time together recently; both of them were so busy with the Order, but that would change. He was going to make more time, for Sirius, for his friends, for baby Harry.

"But when I see you darling," Sirius whispered in his ear, "it's like we both are falling in love again."

Remus kissed, licked, nibbled Sirius' neck. He inhaled his scent, loving every smell, every bit of this man in his arms.

"It'll be just like starting over."

*************************************************

Christmas 1996

But when I see you darling

Remus was walking down the stairs at 12 Grimmauld Place when he heard the song. It took his brain half a second to identify the melody.

His heart recognized it immediately.

The Trio (as Remus had come to affectionately think of them) were in the library, listening to music on a music player Hermione had received from her parents. How she had managed to charm it to play here, with all these wards and enchantments around the spooky monstrosity of a house, he didn't know. But there they were - Harry, Ron, and Hermione, listening to it. The boys were on the floor, playing chess and Hermione was sitting in a chair, singing quietly to herself. No, she was singing to Ginny - how could he have missed her, with bright red hair, sitting there on the floor, trying hard not to watch Harry.

"It's like we both are falling in love again, it'll be just like starting over, starting over," Hermione sang quietly. She had a pleasant singing voice, Remus thought.

"That's pretty," said Ginny, rocking to the music.

Remus watched as Hermione stood up, and after a glance at the boys on the floor, she shook her head and grabbed Ginny, pulling her up. They started dancing, laughing as they put their arms on each other clumsily, and swayed to the music.

"Professor," said Ron, noticing Lupin standing in the doorway. "Did you need to get in here?" he asked.

Remus shook his head at Ron. He stood in front of the girls, his hand held out. "If I may?" he said before he realized the words left his mouth.

Everyone looked up, surprised. Professor Lupin didn't say much these days. He continued working for the Order, working on assignments for Professor Dumbledore, but he had been so unhappy. They had all been so unhappy, since Sirius...

Ginny looked at Hermione, unsure what to do. Hermione gave him a smile. "I'd love to," she said, taking his hand, and stepping next to him.

He put his hand on her shoulders, one on her waist, very chaste, he made sure, and began to dance her around the room. He gave her a little spin, and she laughed.

Our life together is so precious together

We have grown, we have grown

Although our love is still special

Let's take a chance and fly away somewhere

"You dance so well, Professor," Hermione said, smiling.

"You should have seen Sirius, he could really..." said Remus, stopping mid sentence. He looked over at Harry, who was looking at him, his eyes hungry for Sirius, for stories about Sirius; he looked like he did when someone talked about James and Lily. Maybe he was ready to talk about it. Maybe they both were ready.

"He could really dance," Remus said, chuckling softly. He wanted to tell them a story about Sirius dancing, but the only one he could think of was James' birthday party. He'd have to think of some different stories for them later. "Ron, get up here," he said instead.

Ron looked over at Harry, and then stood up, walked over to Lupin. Remus stepped out of the way, and gently pushed him towards Hermione. "Dance with this pretty girl, already," he said quietly to Ron.

Ron grinned. He put his long arms around her and pulling her closer, danced with Hermione, who was blushing pink.

As he was leaving the room, he saw Harry scoot over to sit next to Ginny, say something to her that made her laugh.

'Take care of each other,' he thought to himself. He wanted to tell them, to watch over each other, to always be each others' best friends. He wanted to warn them about discord, about lies and dishonesty, and not believing in each other. But this was not the time. This was the holidays; they were happy, happier than they'd been in a long while.

He looked over at Harry, who was watching him now. He smiled, and saw Harry smile back at him. 'He's going to be okay, Sirius,' Remus said to himself. They both were going to be okay.