Somewhere I Belong

If I could ride this slide into forever
What would I give to getaway
That pain that stayed
Seemed like forever
What would you give to getaway

I know this is how I could be over you
You know this is not another waste of time
All this holding on can't be wrong
Just come back to me and I am not alone
- "Getaway" by Train

"What the hell is that?" Alex and Draco screamed in unison. Alex jumped back and hit the floor, frightened. Draco searched the floor for his wand. He wanted to know who or what had just touched him.

Finding it he shouted, "Lumos," instantly bringing light upon a trembling Alex.

"What did you think you were doing? Are you trying to scare me? Or is this another attempt to ambush me?" Alex said, infuriated.

"What am I doing? You're the one who just grabbed me! I almost hexed you to pieces!" Draco said, panting. He was grateful he didn't overreact.

"Ok, ok, I'm sorry. I didn't know you were in here. I was just trying to get out of the downpour," Alex said, breathless. It was just then she noticed Draco wasn't wearing his shirt. He had taken it off because it was soaked from the rain.

"Well, come on, you might as well stay," Draco said, leading her to where he'd been preparing to make a fire. Alex sat on a small rock next to where Draco had made a small pile of sticks. He went into the back of the cave, and picked up a few more twigs before coming back to where she could see him.

He picked up a few, tossing them behind him saying, "Damn, they're wet from the rain." Alex stared at him for a few minutes, smiling to herself.

"What?" he said, noticing her grin.

"Well, don't take this the wrong way, but you never struck me as the outdoorsy type," Alex said, nodding her head toward the fire he was making.

"I'm not outdoorsy, it's just common sense," he said defensively.

"Yeah, if you're a boy scout or something," Alex retorted.

"A what?" Draco asked abruptly.

"Never mind," Alex said, remembering that pretty much all of his family were pure-bloods, so he wasn't accustomed to hearing about Muggle things.

He shrugged and pointed his wand at the sticks saying, "Incendio." A small blaze sparked out of the tip of his wand. Alex was grateful for it, not having her wand with her. Draco warmed his hands, and began a conversation.

"What happened to your arm?" he asked, noticing the deep wounds.

"Well, when I was trying to get away, I couldn't get out the front door, so I had to open it with my fist. I guess it bit back," she said, trying to be humorous, but not feeling very cheery. Draco only nodded, but answered with another question. Alex could tell that when he spoke, his mood had changed.

" Why did you run away?" he asked. Alex paused before answering, a clap of thunder filling in the bit of silence.

"Well, it might sound crazy, but I don't like being kidnapped, and being forced to watch others be tortured," she answered sarcastically.

"No, I mean, when we were in the library," Draco said, looking into the fire instead of at her. Alex bit her lip, not being able to answer.

"I was...scared," she said finally. Draco looked up at her, almost surprised.

"Scared of me?" he asked, now looking up.

"Well, maybe. What does it matter now? I know what the real purpose was. I should have known. I had a bad feeling from the beginning, but I guess I'm just really naive," Alex said almost feeling sorry for herself.

"There was no intention of you getting hurt. Physically or otherwise," Draco said, reassuringly after hearing her pitying tone.

"Bullshit. You knew I had no friends and that my being all alone was leverage. You used my downfall against me. You knew I would jump at the chance to have a friend, even if they were only joking. I'm a pathetic excuse for a human being, but I didn't need you, of all people, to remind me of that," she said her voice impassively.

"But it's different," Draco said quietly.

"Really? And how is it different? You have to be pretty cruel to mess with somebody's emotions. And I'm not just referring to myself. I'm sure you've degraded many people in your lifetime," Alex said cynically.

"No actually, you were the first," Draco said, a deeper meaning in his words, not visible to Alex.

She replied sardonically, "Well congratulations. It must have been a very special time for you."

"No. You know, you think I'm just a hollow person. You think like everyone else. Just because I'm not a very emotional person doesn't mean I don't feel," he said staring hard at the ground. Flashes of lightning invaded even the darkest corners of the cave that weren't touched by the firelight.

"Well, then were you feeling when Peter Pettigrew was practically killing me? How about when Pansy Parkinson was insulting me? Or when your goons were calling me Mudblood and throwing my stuff? I have a very good memory Draco, and I don't remember a single intervention. All you did was apologize and act like nothing happened," she said, her anger and hurt filling her.

"I know, and I owe everything to you for tolerating it. But if I could go back and change it, I wouldn't," he said, looking firmly into her eyes.

"Yeah, you could relive the thrill of pretending to be friends with some sorry good for nothing Mudblood," Alex said, her pain visible to Draco.

"No, because I wouldn't have been here...with you," he said, looking away now. Alex's breath caught in her throat. She wasn't sure how he'd meant what he'd just said. She felt that feeling returning. The feeling she got when he was near her. The feeling had gone away for awhile, and now it was back, creeping up inside her.

"Don't start that again, I know how it ends already. I'll forgive you, and then you'll betray me again. I'm not going to fall for it," she said softly.

"No, because of all the times I've lied, I'm not now. I promise you that," he said. His words wrenched her insides. He hoped she would forgive him because he was being as honest as it was possible to be.

She turned away slightly and said, "I don't think I can trust you. Not again, after everything that happened."

Draco moved closer and said, "Then why are you still here? If you can't trust me, aren't you afraid I'll turn you in or something?" Alex thought for a minute. He was right, but she knew why she was still there.

"Because after it all, I just can't let go," she said quietly.

He took her hand in his and whispered, "Then don't. I'm never letting go." They slept peacefully through the night. Neither of them expecting what would happen when they woke.