Eye of the Snake

Eye of the Snake

Chapter 1: Advance Guard

YOU-KNOW-WHO ESCAPES PORTAL

Evil lord was last seen in Bristol

A report by Sally Watson

He-who-must-not-be-named was sent into a parallel universe via portal last week thanks to Hermione Granger, 16, a student at Hogwarts.

But just yesterday, a Muggle newscast saw you-know-who hitchhiking a red Chevy on a highway near Bristol. This means that the evil lord is back. Watch out Harry Potter!

***

Harry and friends looked at the news article with horrified faces. Voldemort was back? How could that be? Everyone knew that Hermione had sent him through a portal just last week, and that he probably went to a parallel universe.

Just as everyone was done reading the article, the rest of the mail came. Many of the students received gifts for Christmas.

Neville got a "Self-Repairing Smoke Bomb"; it was a simple device that would hit an object and have a smoky eruption, then repair itself. Neville's had the special boomerang spell, so the bomb would come right back to you. This, of course, came from Neville's grandmother, who would send him weapons for safety ever since she joined the Order.

Malfoy got the usual sweets and cadies from old mommy and daddy.

Ron got an interesting ring from girlfriend Lavender, who was on Christmas break. It was silver, only colored orange. It had a dragon carved on the top, and was very nice looking.

Poor Harry didn't have the sort of present the rest got. Of course, the usual Weasley sweater and fudge came (the sweater was dark green and had a lightning bolt on it), and Hagrid sent him a deck of cards that would confuse the opposite person when you played any game, and the Dursleys sent him a Dell PC with a year of AOL (too bad they didn't know electronics don't work at Hogwarts).

The Dursleys had been spending a lot of money ever since Dudley lost 295 pounds. Harry had gotten sick of the diet food he was forced to eat, so he threatened Dudley to become bulimic or he'd give him a pig tail that couldn't come off. So he got sort of anorexic, but the Dursleys didn't care. With all the leftover money that was usually spent on food, they became rich and were even nice to Harry.

But back to the subject. Harry received a letter that had a banner across the top that said: C.R.A.P.: Citizens Raging Against Phones. He knew this was the Order of the Phoenix's secret name, and Harry told the Weasleys, Neville, and Hermione to follow him.

Once inside the Gryffindor common room, Harry opened the letter and out popped Reamus Lupin.

"I was wondering when you were going to open it," he said, breathing very hard.

"What are you doing here?" Ron asked.

"Well, Ron," said Lupin. "I just used a Transletter. It is a low-grade Portkey, and is used to ship yourself to someone else.

"Now, Harry, I'm sure you're aware that Voldemort is back."

"Yes," Harry said.

"I have been assigned to protect you, as your advance guard,"

"Why can't I protect myself?" Harry fumed, hormones sparking.

"Harry, you must understand that you need protection!"

"I'm sixteen years old! I'm not a baby!"

"I'm going to protect you no matter what," Lupin said, leaving the room.

"I have to go set up my office. I've been reinstated to be your Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher!"

"I'm still hungry," said Ron, and he led Ginny and Neville out of the dorm.

"I'll catch up!" called Hermione, but they didn't seem to care. "Harry, I want to talk. What I said last week... I can't stop that from being true."

Harry never wanted her to bring this up, but still spoke confidently. "Hermione, I can't go out with you, not when Voldemort's out there."

"But, Harry," Hermione said, tears coming out of her eyes. "I love you!"

"And I love you!" Harry returned. "But if anyone knew that, both of us would be in great danger. I can't let you go through that!"

Hermione was silent for a while, and then said, "So you do love me?"

"What do you think?" said Harry. For a moment, it looked like the two were about to kiss, but Harry turned away and went downstairs without a word.

***

The next day, another C.R.A.P. letter arrived for Harry. "Who sent themselves to me this time?" Harry sarcastically asked.

This time the envelope contained a note from Dumbledore. It said:

Dear Harry,

I have been pacing my office for a long time now. As you know, the Death Eaters aren't to far away from taking over Hogwarts.

I wish that you reassemble the DA, and have lessons start as early as next week. This is helping a great deal.

Sincerely,

Dumbledore

"What does it say?" asked Ron.

Harry handed the note over to Ron, who broke into laughter.

" Dear Mr. Wobblebottoms,

There are offices in my pockets, and they make me dance around. As you know, old men shouldn't dance.

I wish I was a llama. Llamas don't have to put up with these things. Thank you for understanding.

Sincerely,

Bob Vila"

"Shut up, Ron," Harry said. "that's not what it says..."

Harry grabbed the letter back, and as soon as he did, the letters on the note changed into the real message.

"Excellent!" said Ron. "It's probably so no one can know what's happening!"

"Duh," Hermione said.

"But guys," said Neville, "the letter was already ripped open!"

"Correct, Longbottom," said a voice inside the envelope. Out stepped Voldemort, snake eyes and all.

"Hello, Harry," he said. "it's so nice to be at Hogwarts again. Avada Kadavra!"

1/10/05