Erised Revisited

9. O.W.L.s

Were anyone to ask Harry's opinion, he would tell them Hermione was well on her way to insanity, and seemed determined to take everyone else with her. It was nearing the end of summer and the O.W.L. results had not yet arrived. The explanation from Mr. Weasley was that the entire Ministry of Magic was overwhelmed with both the sudden change of administration and the 'official' return of Voldemort. In this time of extreme crisis, getting the O.W.L.S graded and posted in a timely manner was simply moved further down the ever growing list of governmental priorities.

Of course, these reasonable facts did not placate Hermione in the slightest. Unless she was working on Legilimency/Occlumency or summer homework, she was letting the world know how displeased she was with the Ministry's handling of the O.W.L. situation. A few times during these rants Harry had caught Percy opening his mouth, presumably to defend the Ministry, but before a word was uttered, Percy would stop and then laugh quietly to, and probably at, himself.

This particular morning Hermione seemed even more on edge that usual and when the morning post arrived with still no results, she rounded on Harry.

"This is your fault, you know!!"

Harry was completely floored by the sudden attack. "Mine?!"

"If you hadn't dragged us all gone traipsing around the Department of Mysteries, Fudge wouldn't have been kicked out, and I'd know how many O.W.L.s I passed!"

As soon as the words were out, her hand flew to her mouth in horror as she realized what she had just said. She then turned and ran off in tears.

As Harry stood in open-mouthed shock, Ron appeared at his shoulder, echoing a statement Ron had made many times in the past, and seemed to be saying a lot in the present as well. "Mental that one."

Harry recovered enough to silently count to two, waiting for the next words, which always followed Ron's opinion of Hermione's current mental state. Ron did not disappoint. "Let's go flying."

Harry didn't know why Ron bothered to pause between the utterances. He might as well just say, 'She's mental, so let's go flying.' Harry had once thought that the pause was some attempt at sensitivity, but as this was Ron, the notion was quickly dismissed.

He was having doubts about Ron's mental health as well. As obsessed as Hermione was with the O.W.L.s, Ron was perhaps even more so with Quidditch. The new brooms he had talked his father into buying for himself and Ginny certainly did not help matters.

The two new Firebolts had caused quite a row between Mr. and Mrs. Weasley.

"We just bought Ron a Cleansweep. What on Earth does he need a new broom for?"

"But, Molly, he wasn't Captain of the team then. For that matter, he wasn't even on the team then."

"Charlie was Captain as well. What would he say if he knew you had bought Ron a new broom for making Captain?"

"Charlie's not the sort to think about such things. None of our children are. That's why I want to get them a few things now that I can, that we can, I mean to say."

"And Ginny? She's not even officially on the team anymore. Now that Harry is no longer banned, she doesn't have a spot."

"She's a wonderful flier. There's little chance she won't be a Chaser, even if her brother wasn't Captain."

By this time, Mrs. Weasley had worked herself into a pose more reserved for Fred and George than her husband, and she seemed determined to continue the argument.

Mr. Weasley cleared his throat. "Molly dear, it just didn't seem right that, with three of our children on the House Team, only one should have a Firebolt."

Mrs. Weasley's eyes narrowed at the obvious emotional manipulation and turned to walk away abruptly. Mr. Weasley smiled weakly in the direction of Harry, Ron, and Ginny who were all standing expectantly near the Great Room fireplace. Mr. Weasley was not in a good color at the moment as he knew he would be paying more than gold for the new Firebolts.

Ron shook his fist in the air. "YES!"

Ginny promptly clouted him on the back of the head for his lack of couth. Harry sniggered at the hollow sound the swat seemed to make. Ginny stared daggers at Harry with the implied threat, 'You want to be next?' In response, Harry managed to turn his laugh into a feeble coughing fit.

That argument was now days old and Ron's flying/Quidditch obsession had grown exponentially since acquiring the broom. His parents seemed more or less back on good terms, but Harry had heard Mr. Weasley asked Ron and Ginny to keep the new brooms as inconspicuous as possible until they were back at school. Ron decided the best way to do this was to keep flying out of sight of the house. Ginny had gone another route and decided to avoid flying altogether. Harry would not think this odd except for the fact that she seemed to be avoiding anything that involved putting her in proximity to him. He was equally relieved, disappointed, and baffled with this sudden turn of behavior.

Many times a night, he had to stop himself from using the Extendable Ears even though they buzzed incessantly and even seductively. He managed to do so by telling himself that he needed to figure out what was going on in his own head before he tried to figure what was going on in hers. Don't take too long though, Potter. Something tells me the longer I wait, the more difficult things will get.

So he and Ron were running all the two-man drills they could think of. Even though their brooms were now identical, Harry was still the better, more natural flier, but Ron compensated with determination and a recklessness that spoke of a complete lack of regard for self-preservation. They were pretty evenly matched and by noon both were exhausted but happy. They came to a stop about fifty feet above the center of the practice area breathing hard and grinning.

"Good dive, Harry. If Malfoy would have tried to stay with you in that, he'd end up with another broken jaw."

Harry ignored the thousandth broken jaw reference and just smiled back. "You stayed with me well enough."

"This broom is just fantastic. I can't understand how Ginny is not flying it."

"I don't think it's just the broom, Ron. You're truly a great flyer."

"Just because I was able to keep up with you I'm a great flyer? Not full of yourself are you?"

Harry smiled and shrugged. "It takes more skill to follow successfully than to lead...in flying anyway."

"You're right of course. You're great. I'm great. The Cup is ours. Should I write the other Captains and ask for their forfeiture?

"And miss the look on the Slytherin's faces? Not a bloody chance."

"Mm, that will be a joy." Ron looked off into the clouds as he thought about that very thing.

"I almost kissed Ginny."

Ron's attention was brought around instantly. He looked at Harry with raised eyebrows and curiosity. "You what?"

"I almost kissed Ginny."

"Ginny ... my sister."

Harry fought hard to keep the sarcasm from his voice, but ultimately failed. "Yeah, that Ginny." Easy, Potter. Don't get smart with him until you know he doesn't want to hurt you...badly.

"Almost kissed?"

"Uh, yeah, almost."

"Why?"

Why? Why what? Why almost? Why did I want to kiss her? Why didn't I succeed? Harry had no idea how to answer 'why' in any way and not possibly end up with a broken jaw himself. The biggest 'why' in Harry's head at the moment was why he had just blurted the information to Ron.

The silence prompted Ron to ask a different question. "Alright if that one was too tough, then when?"

"The day your mum was attacked, just before you flew up to tell all of us in the garden about it."

Ron looked away from Harry and his eyes glazed slightly as he remembered the day. He slowly nodded his head. "Right. You were standing awfully close. So I interrupted?"

"Er, yes."

"And you would have kissed her had I not?"

"I am pretty sure."

"Why?"

"Uh..." Silence.

"It's a simple question, Harry."

The Bloody Hell it is.

With uncharacteristic perception Ron determined Harry was not going to answer anytime soon, so he asked yet another question, "Was it a joke?"

"A joke? On who?"

"On Ginny. Figure you'd see if you could get a reaction and then laugh it off?"

Harry stared at Ron in dismay. "You really think I'd do something like that?"

Ron made a dismissive gesture. "No telling what you're up to since you don't seem to be willing to answer any of my questions."

"She said she'd never been kissed well."

Ron looked at him in confusion for a few moments and then asked mockingly, "Ah, so now you're King of Snog? Felt it was your duty to lend your expertise to my poor little sister?"

"Hardly. Apparently, I'm rather terrible at it." Harry eyes widened, and he swallowed hard as he realized what he had just said.

"Really? Says who?"

"Cho."

"She told you that you were a terrible kisser?! I never gave her credit for that much nerve." Ron sounded impressed until he realized Harry might not share his assessment of Cho. He quickly composed a look of sympathy on his face. Harry was too busy trying to figure out how not to tell Ron where he came by the information to notice either reaction.

"No, Cho didn't exactly say it to me. It's a rumor that is circulating between some Hogwarts students."

"I haven't heard anything about it."

"Just the girls."

"Oh...you're not a girl, Harry. How do you know about this rumor?"

An idea suddenly popped into Harry's brain, "We have been practicing Legilimency, you know." Harry stopped short of saying that's where heard the rumor. The statement by itself was not a lie. If Ron jumped to a conclusion that was not entirely correct, it wouldn't really be Harry's fault, would it?

"So? Oh! Right! Uh, sorry, Harry. I imagine that's not something anyone wants to hear about themselves."

Harry breathed a quiet sigh of relief momentarily forgetting that he had other questions before him.

Ron reminded him. "So Ginny said she'd never been kissed well, and you've been told round about that you're an awful kisser. Just figured on using her for some practice then?"

"No, damn it! I just...I thought...I wanted...Sod off, you prat! It's none of yours."

"Hey! This is my sister we're discussing. If you're just trying to get some kicks off her then I'll have to do some kicking myself. As in your arse."

Harry stared at Ron in disbelief. Ron stared back in challenge.

After some time, Ron broke the thick silence. "Do you think she's pretty?"

Harry licked his dry lips. "Very."

"You did seem rather appreciative at Malkins'."

"Noticed that?"

"Hard not too."

Harry and Ron once again lapsed into silence. Harry fidgeting precariously on his broom under Ron's critical stare.

Ron's brow furrowed suddenly. "Why tell me?"

Harry rubbed his face and answered between his fingers. "Believe me; I haven't got a blessed clue."

"Hmm, well, she is my sister, and I'm your best friend. I think it was a good idea to me for you to tell me about it."

"Does it? Seems pretty bloody stupid to me right now. I can't answer any of your questions, Ron. Not that I don't want to. I just don't have a single answer for you."

"S'alright, Harry. If you were really up to something, you wouldn't have told me anything. You would have snuck around like that sodding Dean or Michael."

"Er, right."

"I know it took me awhile to figure out how much I liked Her-" Ron stopped abruptly and took a breath. "By 'her', of course, you know I mean Susan. But then it became pretty clear how much I did like her, and I acted on it. Anyway, when you figure out how much you like Ginny - and I think it will turn out to be quite a lot - it's alright with me as long as you're honest with her about it. Speaking of...here she comes now."

Harry looked in the direction of Ron's nod and Ginny was approaching on her new broom. Harry's smiled and his heart swelled in his chest as he thought she might actually be planning on joining the practice and spending some time with him...and Ron as well, of course. But as she came closer he could see she was in a poor mood for Quidditch. Harry's mind raced around the possibilities of another attack by Voldemort's forces.

Ron also noticed her grim expression and spoke up first. "What is it!? Another attack!?"

"Attack? Oh, no, nothing like that. I came to see if Harry would speak to Hermione."

Ron snorted in amazement. "Blimey! After what she said to him, why would he want to?"

"That's just it, you see. She's very upset that she said what she said. Thinks Harry hates her now."

"Ridiculous. I don't hate her. I blame myself for a lot of things that happened that day. Why shouldn't she?"

"She doesn't really. You two know her as well or better than I, school is everything to her -"

"Too right it is," muttered Ron with bitterness in his voice that astonished Harry. He started to turn to his friend and ask what was wrong.

"-and these test results will determine her entire academic future. I understand that you might not want to talk to her, Harry, but she's so distraught. I just have to ask you to."

Harry looked back to Ginny and shrugged. "I'll talk to her. She's in your room?"

"Yes. We should all head back anyway. Mum's almost got lunch on."

"You two go on ahead together. I want to practice a couple more dives." Ron gave Harry an obvious wink and a not-to-subtle nudge. Harry rubbed his eyes wearily and prayed Ginny had not noticed but could not see how it would have been possible for her not to.

When he looked up Ginny was already speeding away. He wrenched the broom around quickly and took off after her. He was very tempted to just follow behind her as the view was quite spectacular. However, Ginny was going nowhere near top speed and he did not want to act like he was avoiding her, so he pushed forward and sped up to catch her.

Harry spoke as he pulled along side her. "It's good to you see on your broom."

She gave a small smile in reply.

"You could practice with Ron and me, you know."

Ginny gave another small smile and paused before her reply. "I'm not entirely comfortable with owning this thing yet."

"Your mum?"

"Mm, some of that, but then it just seems a little too...I dunno, too nice?"

Harry bit his lip and nodded thoughtfully. "So you're not just avoiding me?" Bloody...just can't keep your mouth shut can you, Potter?

"Avoiding you? It seems to me like you're the one doing the avoiding. Running off to fly with Ron every spare moment."

"Yes, but..." Harry's mind raced back over the last few days. "I suppose you're right. It might have seemed that way."

"Maybe we were both a little guilty then?" she offered.

"Maybe. And maybe, from now on, I'll let Ron practice a little on his own."

Ginny smiled demurely. "He may wonder why. What will you tell him?"

"I've already told him what happened. Well, that is, what almost happened. It just-" Harry stopped talking when he realized he was now flying alone. He looked to either side and then behind him. It was there where he saw that Ginny had pulled up in a dead stop. Harry pulled his broom around, circling back to her.

Harry stopped to face her. "Something wrong?"

"What exactly did you say to Ron?" asked Ginny slowly.

Harry shrugged. "I told him I almost kissed you."

"Why?"

'Why' again. 'Why' what? "'Why' what?"

"Why did you tell him that?"

"Well...because I almost did."

Ginny huffed in exasperation. "But why tell him?"

"I can't really say. I wasn't thinking when I did it."

"Really?" The level of sarcasm in Ginny's voice made Harry wince.

"This will sound daft but I've been trying to avoid it when I can."

Ginny shook her head in confusion. "Avoid what?"

"Thinking."

"Yes, it does sound daft. I hope there's a reason that perhaps isn't daft?"

"Thinking generally leads to remembering, and I'm not very enthused about remembering certain things which always seem to take center stage in my mind."

"But you've been doing so well in Hermione's sessions. That requires a lot of thinking."

"Yes, but it's focused on doing the magic correctly. I can lose myself in it for time which is rather nice. "

"I can understand that I suppose." Ginny's tone implied she was still doubtful. Her brow furrowed. "You seemed pretty chummy with Ron just now. How did that happen? Why wasn't he trying to kill you?"

"For what?"

"For trying to kiss me."

"He was fairly supportive of the notion."

Ginny looked at him doubtfully. "Are you taking the mickey?"

"Not at all. He said it was alright with him."

"What was alright with him? Kissing me?"

Harry shook his head. "Er, not exactly. He said it would be alright with him when I figured out my feelings for you, what ever they turned out to be."

"Really?! And have you?"

"He also said that I should be honest with you, and to be honest with you, I have to say no. I am very confused at the moment."

"Oh! Thank Merlin!" The joy in Ginny's voice and face took Harry completely by surprise.

"Excuse me?!"

"Look! I think it's the O.W.L.s!"

Harry followed her pointing finger to look over his left shoulder. Not too far away were three owls flying in formation with fat, gilded envelopes attached to their legs.

"We're saved!" exclaimed Ginny with relief.

She took off after the owls with the O.W.L.s. Harry was left alone in the sky in deep confusion and dissatisfaction. The conversation had seemed to be heading somewhere promising, but then it was just gone, as was the pretty redhead.

"Girls," he muttered as he twisted his broom around and headed for the house.

Minutes later, Harry closed the door to the broom closet and turned to find Ginny standing in front of him with her mother close behind. Ginny held out two envelopes for him to take, one with his name and one with Hermione's. Harry took the one with Hermione's name and moved towards the stairs.

Ginny called out after him in a disappointed voice, "Don't you want to have a peek at yours first?"

Harry replied, "They'll still be the same after I see about Hermione. Won't they?"

He smiled ironically as he took the first stair and heard Ginny's frustrated voice. "Boys."

He paused briefly before knocking on the bedroom door. If Ginny was to be believed, and she wasn't the sort not to be believed, there was a crying teenaged girl on the other side of this heavy wooden door. It was a toss up for Harry at the moment as to whether he'd rather face that horror or a Death Eater. His other option being going back down stairs to face a disappointed Ginny and his own O.W.L. results; he took a deep breath and knocked.

"Hermione, it's Harry. I have something for you. May I come in?"

There was no answer. Harry knocked again, harder this time, wondering if she'd fallen asleep. He then tried the knob and it turned easily, too easily for his tastes.

He spoke through the slightly opened door. "Are you awake, Hermione? May I come in?"

There was still no answer so he poked his head into the room. Hermione was laying on her bed, fully clothed with her back to him. Her body was trembling as if cold but as the room was fairly warm, the motion was more likely from tears.

Harry spoke softly, saying the only thing he could think of, "Hermione, the O.W.L. results have arrived."

This, of course, proved to be the wrong thing to say, as the silent weeping now blossomed into open sobbing. Bugger. Nice one, Harry, you git.

"I'm sorry, Hermione. I suppose I was bound to say the wrong thing. I should have been more thoughtful."

This proved to be yet another verbal blunder as her sobs grew in intensity and volume. I should turn around right now and go find that Death Eater.

But he didn't. He entered the room and sat gingerly on the bed. He then put his chin in his hand as he tried to think of what to do next. Opening his mouth again was most definitely a no-no, but sitting silently and motionlessly near her did not seem to be helping matters either. He carefully placed his hand on her head and began stroking her bushy hair slowly. She seemed to calm down, and, after a time, she reached out to take his hand in hers and give it a soft squeeze. They kept still for several more minutes before she finally sat up and turned around.

Her face was glistening with poorly wiped tears and her eyes were severely bloodshot. Harry smiled to try and reassure her but again he seemed to have erred. Her lower lip began to tremble. Harry could see the coming renewal of tears. He reacted quickly and took her hands in his.

"Please stop crying, Hermione. There's nothing to be sad about. I'm not mad at you. I don't hate you. It will take a lot more than a few badly chosen words from you or me to hurt our friendship."

"I just can't believe what I said to you."

"It's alright. Believe me, I completely understand. I have been having a little trouble with reaction control myself. That is, even more so than I usually do." Harry smiled again, and this time, Hermione returned it.

She wiped some of the wetness from her face. "I am very sorry, Harry."

"I know you are. And I know how important the O.W.L.s are to you -"

A little of the old indignant Hermione managed to creep back. "To all of us. They are our future. But that's still no excuse for my behavior."

"You don't need an excuse. Everyone's entitled to be a little Ron now and then."

Hermione managed to chuckle at that. "That's not very nice, Harry."

Harry shrugged. "He'd be the first to agree with me, at least in an effort to excuse himself for some future misdeed."

"I suppose."

Harry held up a gilded, ornately embossed envelope. "So, do you want this or not?"

Hermione's eyes grew wide and her mouth opened in what appeared to me complete terror. She made no move to take the item from his hand.

"I guess that's a 'not.'" Harry rose from the bed and began to move to the door.

"Wait! Yes, of course, I want it but..."

"Shall I open it for you then?"

Hermione nodded quickly.

"And read it for you?"

Again, a nod for an answer.

Harry snapped to attention and began to open the envelope in as formal a fashion as he could affect. His manner changed to one of consternation, and he placed the opened packet on the night stand. Hermione's eyes were riveted to it. Harry then pulled off his glasses and breathed on to them. Gathering up a handful of his shirt he started to clean his glasses thoroughly. Holding them up to the light, he seemed satisfied and put them back on. As he retrieved the envelope he could tell that Hermione desperately wanted to tell him to hurry up but was successfully holding herself silent. Harry finally unfolded the sheaf of papers and began to read through them.

Harry scowled. "Well, of course, there was that bit of distraction during the Astronomy test. You'd have thought they'd have taken that into consideration."

Then he clucked his tongue. "But there wasn't any during Charms. Oh! Or History, for that matter."

With every word, Hermione was burying her face deeper into her hands and shaking her head in dismay.

Harry finally laughed. "Oh come off it, Hermione! You got 'Outstanding' on everything. As if there were ever any doubt."

Her head snapped up and a second later the rest of her followed as she snatched the papers from Harry's had and started to read through them enthusiastically.

"Well," Harry huffed. "That was polite."

As she flipped to the last page, Hermione let out a squeal of delight. She suddenly lunged at Harry. She hugged him hard which was somewhat disconcerting to Harry as he had hoped the teasing might have yielded more entertaining results. However, it was even more disconcerting when she kissed him full on the mouth. It was over in less than a second, and Hermione was back to a more detail examination of her O.W.L.s as if nothing had happened, but Harry was left standing in shock.

Harry blinked. Once. Twice. And then spoke, "Er- yes, well, I'll just leave you two alone then. Good work, Hermione."

She grunted something which Harry accepted as permission to leave and did so. Just outside the door Harry patted his lips with his right hand. It was obvious that the kiss was nothing more than something celebratory, as sometimes happened at New Year's Eve but it was still very strange. On one hand, Harry could not help but think he had missed an opportunity to kiss back and perhaps squelch some rumors about his kissing prowess. On the other hand, the thought of really kissing Hermione was almost as nauseating as the thought of kissing Ron. Well, perhaps not nearly that nauseating.

What had happened though was that she had kissed him, for whatever reason, and he had done nothing, even less than nothing. Were she to ever tell anyone about it, his fate would be sealed. Coupled with the other rumors already flying about, they would perhaps crown him Dead Fish Potter or some other equally slighting nickname. Harry had not thought Hermione to be the type of girl to engage in such chat, but after what he had heard over the Extendable Ears, he knew she was. But would she? Did she even realize she had done it?

"Bugger."

*

Harry's own O.W.L. results turned out to be a pleasant surprise. With the exception of History, he had scored outstanding on everything, even Potions. He therefore had all the required scores to attend the N.E.W.T. level courses needed to become an Auror. He wondered if Professor Dumbledore or Professor McGonagall might intervene on his behalf and persuade Snape to allow him into the advanced Potions courses. Harry did not look forward to two more years of Snape. It would just have to be something to get through in order to achieve his goal.

Ron's score had been identical to Harry's with the exception on the extra point Harry had scored for his Patronus. Harry and Ron spent the rest of the day discussing their possible futures, though Ron did most of the talking as Harry considered his path set. About the only career Ron was not considering was that of a Ministry official with the exception of Magical Law Enforcement. He actually had some interest in being an Auror too, but the thought of two more years of Snape and his mum's reaction was enough to move that thought very, very far down on the list.

With all the excitement of the day, Harry entered the twins room that night utterly spent. He was even more tired than the days when they had done nothing but Occlumency/Legilimency training. As he flopped down onto the bed, he cursed as he realized he would have to get back up to undress for bed. However, the bed just felt so wonderful he rejected that plan and decided to just fall asleep right there. Then the buzzing started.

"Bugger."

Harry lifted a tired hand and rubbed his eyes. He willed the buzzing to stop, but it didn't. He pulled his hand down over his face in exasperation. When it reached his lips, his tired eyes sprang wide open and awake. If the buzzing was from the girls' room, they might be talking about him. Would Hermione tell Ginny what had happened? If Hermione were going to tell anyone, it would be her. Will that ruin my chances with Ginny? Do I have a chance with her? Do I want one? Since I seem to be so worried how Ginny will react, I think I do.

Shaking his head at himself the whole time, Harry opened the Extendable Ears compartment. It was indeed the girls' room that was buzzing. Harry's hand hesitated only briefly before he pulled the end to his ear.

Hermione was speaking. "- the part that Mum loves so much about it, all the new research, techniques, and procedures that come out. You constantly have to read journals and keep your skills and knowledge updated. Dad doesn't have much enthusiasm for that though. He tends to let Mum give him the condensed version. He prefers interacting with the patient and actually performing the procedures. Drives Mum nutters."

Ginny giggled. "Like you and Ron and Harry. You do all the hard work and strain it out for them."

Harry frowned, but Hermione laughed. She responded, "You know, I never made that connection, but it is spot on."

Harry's frown deepened to a scowl.

Hermione stopped laughing. "But isn't it wonderful that we all did so well? I am so very proud of them. Ron especially. I knew Harry would do well, but Ron, he is just always so dismissive of school work. It was quite fun to listen to him be so excited about it all today."

"It's fun to listen to all of you. Almost makes me look forward to taking the bloody things myself. Not really, but almost. I think you'll be a brilliant Healer, Hermione."

"I know Mum and Dad will be really happy about it. They're going to love hearing about magical dental practices."

"The way Muggles fix teeth. I just can't imagine. Drills of all things? They're mad!"

Hermione giggled. "I suppose it must seem that way, but when you don't have magic, you must make do."

"I know. I know. Remember, I am the daughter of Arthur Weasley. Still though, some things Muggles do are just so strange sometimes."

"I might point out a few eccentricities of the magical world, but I won't. I'm knackered."

"Me too. Bed time then."

There was a pause and Harry started to reach for the Ear, thinking the conversation was over.

"Hermione?"

"Hmm?"

"You're sure it meant nothing?"

"I'm sure. Harry was positively green."

"And to you?"

"I don't know what possessed me. I barely remember doing it. I was just so happy. Believe me, he's all yours."

"We'll see."

The doubt in Ginny's voice was so troubling that sleep took a very long time to take Harry that night.