Roommates

Thirty

The End

After the battle, the survivors had been too exhausted to search for Blaise, barely managing to set up tents and cots to sleep in. The next morning, the sun dawned red and as its rays washed over the tired combatants and the bodies of the slain they all turned towards the ruined castle. There had been a few crashes and noises from within the crumbled stone since the explosion but neither Blaise nor Lilithe had emerged.

They spent the day burying the bodies, one by one, not bothering to hold individual services for them, instead having one big service where only the names of the dead were read off. The day went on and they worked hard, barely holding in the sorrow encompassing the grounds. Especially Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, everyone agreed. Charlie Weasley had died on the battlefield by diving in front of a curse aimed at his sister, Ginny. Lavender Brown had been dragged off somewhere during the fray. So far they had only found a piece of her arm. For a while they thought Snape had been killed or dragged off, but he walked onto the grounds half past noon, his robes blood-soaked and tattered; he refused to say what had happened to him. Draco Malfoy showed up hours after Snape did, also covered in bloodstains. Hermione hadn't heard his testimony, but Snape had vouched for him so Harry grudgingly allowed him to stay.

Hermione looked over the graves. Filius Flitwick's was immediately in front of her, he had died protecting two of the sixth years that had volunteered for the fight; Dedalus Diggle's was four rows up to her right, he had helped them get to Voldemort; Hestia Jones's was two spaces up and to her left, she had been part of the diversion to keep the Death Eaters away from Harry; and several hundred more were part of the death count. She did a quick estimate and winced at the number - almost four hundred graves in total.

A loud shifting of stone made her jump and she turned to stare at the castle. Parts of the stone were shifting aside and she stared for a moment before shouting out, "Help, everyone! Someone's coming out of the wreck!"

Hermione took off running towards the castle, but Snape managed to get in front of her, his wand at the ready. "Miss Granger, I realize you want whoever this is to be your boyfriend, but there is a real possibility that it is indeed his very dangerous older sister and she is out for blood."

A voice from under the stone said, "Oh right, because clearly I cannot have succeeded. Thanks for the vote of confidence, professor."

"Blaise!" Hermione exclaimed. She lifted her wand. "Wingardium leviosa." The stone lifted into the air and she moved her wand so it would drop several feet away. Blaise's head became visible amongst the dirt and dust that flew up with the rock.

"Help, please, someone," he said, coughing. "She's quite heavy; I can't pull her and me out."

Snape's wand flew back up at the ready. "She? Your sister is alive?"

Blaise grunted as two Ministry Aurors came to pull him out. "No. She's dead. It took me an hour to find her, though, under all of that."

"Find her?" Snape asked. "Why?"

Blaise glared at him. "Guess," he snapped. The Aurors set him onto his own feet and he collapsed, yelling in pain.

"Blaise, your leg!" Hermione said. She rushed over to him and tentatively touched the leg. He hissed as her fingertips touched his kneecap--or what had once been his kneecap. "It's broken. Where's Madame Pomfrey?" she asked, looking around. "Someone, go get her, quick!"

"It won't help," he muttered.

"What? Why?"

He looked away. "It just won't." She leaned closer to him, accidentally pressing down on his knee. He yelped and passed out.

A few minutes, later Madame Pomfrey arrived, but for some reason she was unable to heal Blaise's leg or his left arm. She gathered up a quick splint and they carried him to the area where they were tending the wounded. A small tent was set up around Blaise after it appeared he wasn't going to wake up and Hermione went between standing by his cot and Harry's, who had also suffered many wounds, including a broken wand arm. After a day went by and he still hadn't woken up, she wrote to his father. There was no response.

The second day he was unconscious, both Hermione and Harry sat by his bed. Ron came in and stood by the door for a while.

"Hermione," Ron ventured after a while, "how do you know he's going to wake up? He's been through a lot. I've been through a lot. You've been through a lot. If I was him, I might just want to...stay wherever I was."

"He's going to wake up," she said firmly, her folded hands clenching together in her lap. She continued, whispering, "He's going to wake up. He has to, Harry. You'll see."

Harry eyed her carefully and then responded, "I hope so, Hermione. I hope so."

There was silence for a moment until Hermione whispered so softly even she almost couldn't hear it, "I know so."

The rest of the day passed in relative silence, broken only when Harry excused himself to walk for a few moments or when they went to the toilet. Occasionally, someone would come in with food. They would eat in silence and then someone would come take it away.

Hermione slept in a chair by Blaise's cot all that night as she had done since he had been found, one hand resting on the blankets to make sure she would wake up if he moved. When the morning came, she was awake before everyone else, moving about for a few minutes readying some things for people before going back to sit by Blaise.

By mid afternoon, she had almost given up hope that he would ever wake up. She dosed off for a little while, and woke when she heard rustling. Thinking it was the nurse, she kept her eyes closed when responding, "Thanks Poppy, but I'm not hungry."

"Yes, well, I am," she heard Blaise say. His voice was cracked and raspy. Her eyes flew open and she almost launched herself onto him before realizing it would do far more harm than good. She leaned over and hugged him, resting her cheek on his chest for a few moments. His good arm wrapped around her shoulders and she felt his cheek on the top of her hair.

"You're awake," she whispered. Poppy quietly deposited the food on a tray and left them alone after checking Blaise quickly for anything that needed immediate tending to.

"Yes, I am awake. Hand me that food, will you? I'm starving. No, wait. Water first. Loads, if you don't mind." She handed him the glass of water and he gulped it down rapidly. "Ah. Much better." Blaise's face split into a wide grin. "So. I'm alive."

"You are," Hermione replied, tears trickling down her cheeks.

He leaned back onto the pillows and she went back to her chair. "Well, now what? I actually hadn't planned on this. I rather thought I'd be dead if I succeeded and I knew I would be if she had."

Hermione laughed feebly. "Well...now, I guess you can just be with me."

"I guess I can," he said, smiling faintly at her. He put his good arm on the edge of the cot and pushed himself over to one side, grunting with the effort. "Here," he said, after he was where he wanted to be, "come and sit with me."

She sat on the cot and leaned against him. "I have to ask," he said, his voice becoming emotionless and when she looked at him, his eyes were closed. "And I know if you haven't burst out with 'Dumbledore will be here soon' it only means one thing." He opened his eyes and stared into hers. "What happened? How did he...die?"

Hermione's eyes welled up and she sniffed a few times. "I- I didn't want to tell you before you'd recovered-"

Blaise interrupted. "Hermione, I don't know if I'll ever heal from this. My arm and my leg, sure they'll heal. But I don't know if I'll be able to live with what I did."

"Blaise, she was evil. She was going to kill you, going to kill other people. For sheer enjoyment!" Hermione exclaimed.

He sighed and settled back against the pillows. "I know. But she was still my sister. That's why I had to get her out of there. What- what did they do with her?"

"They burned her body," she replied quietly. "And then burned the ashes. I think Professor Snape spit on her before they lit the pyre up, though."

Blaise laughed. "Well, he had the right," he said when she stared at him in horror. "She ruined his life, in several ways. She ruined other people's lives too, and ended even more. It's very fitting, what they did." He sobered up. "Tell me about Dumbledore."

She sighed and leaned up against him again. "He was with Harry, Ron and I, you know that. Helping us get to Voldemort, so Harry could...destroy him. While Harry was fighting, we three were supposed to guard him, which we did. Dumbledore did most of it, though. Then, maybe two minutes before the castle...exploded, a Death Eater appeared out of nowhere. I think it was Lucius Malfoy. He had me, and was going to drag me off, to kill me, when Dumbledore stopped him. It was a diversion, though, to get his attention off the rest of the battle. Another Death Eater killed him, from behind. Then both of the Death Eaters disappeared into the battle. A minute later, the castle exploded and all the living Death Eaters Apparated away. Then everything went black."

Blaise was quiet for a long time. "Did they already have the funeral?"

"No. We were waiting for...well; I don't know what we were waiting for. But I think it might have come, somehow."

"Have you heard from my father? I'm assuming you wrote him, of course. Or that he wrote to you."

"No, not yet. I wrote two days ago so if he was in Italy he might not have gotten the-"

"Blaise!" shouted Zachary's voice from somewhere on the other side of the medical area. "Blaise Zabini, where are you?" Beneath the anger in his voice was an undercurrent of fear.

Someone must have directed Zachary to Blaise's room because he burst in a few moments later and threw himself at his son.

"Oh thank God," he muttered, hugging Blaise to him.

"Dad," Blaise said, his voice muffled, "I can't breathe." Zachary let go of him then and pulled a chair over to the edge of the bed as the tent flap opened and Roan came in, followed by about twenty of the survivors--and a few people from the press.

"Mr. Zabini, is it true you were in the Hogwarts castle when it collapsed? How did you get out in one piece?" shouted one reporter. The others continued in several foreign languages until Zachary started shouting at them in even more languages, his voice sounding much less happy than it was before.

"What's he saying?" Hermione asked.

Blaise laughed under his breath for a moment. "Nothing I will translate," he replied.

A few moments later the reporters and well-wishing busybodies were ushered out by a glaring Snape, who then turned to Hermione.

"Miss Granger, as much as I understand that you wish to be joined at the hip with Mr. Zabini at this point in time, I must insist that you leave."

Hermione glared at him. "And if I don't?"

Snape lifted an eyebrow and said, "Then I shall have to insist a bit more firmly." His hand twitched towards his pocket. Hermione made a disgusted noise and got up to leave. "Please send Mr. Potter in, if you would."

"Fine!" she yelled back at them. "But when you're done, I'm coming back!"

"Was that necessary, Severus?" Zachary asked.

"Not completely, but it was enjoyable," Snape said, settling in a chair. "And once Mr. Potter arrives, I believe we will hear about what happened between your son and daughter."

"Oh will we?" Blaise asked, petulantly sarcastic.

Snape fixed him with a look and said, mildly, "Yes. We will."

Blaise glared at him. "Fine."

The tent flap opened again and Harry came through. "Hermione said you wanted to see me?"

"Yes, sit down, Potter," Snape said, motioning towards a chair. "Mr. Zabini has some things he would like to tell us. Don't you, Mr. Zabini." It was not a question.

Blaise sighed and moved around for a bit, getting more comfortable. "Yes, I suppose I do."

"Go on," Zachary said.

Blaise closed his eyes and leaned back. "After I told everyone to run, I began to, well, 'look' is the best way to describe it. I 'looked' for Lilithe in the thoughts that were coming into my head and had to dive into a corridor to avoid a Killing Curse she sent after me.

"She chased me for an hour, all around the castle. Up stairs, down stairs. I think one of the only things that saved me was that I've been going to Hogwarts for seven years and she'd been there once. I knew how to get around, how and where to hide. She didn't. At one point I had to dive away from her again, but this time I broke my arm.

"We neared the staircases. I heard grinding and knew one was just changing. So I ran for it and dove on to it just before it got out of reach of the platform I was on. Unfortunately, the staircase I was on lead to a section of the castle that didn't have anywhere to get out and back into the main part of the castle. But the staircase bought me time. Several minutes, though it seemed almost an hour at the time.

"I told you she had stored power in me. Somehow, I figured out how to transfer the power from just being stored to coming into my 'source', as it were. There was quite a lot of it; I can only imagine what she would have used it for. So when I was done with that, I devised a spell that would paralyze her.

Blaise described everything and shock kept his listeners in silence for several minutes, and Blaise squirmed under their open-mouthed gazes.

"It isn't as if I did what Harry did," he said, glaring at them. "I didn't rid the world of an evil madman. It's not like I saved the world from someone who would kill everything non magical."

Harry cleared his throat. "Well, Blaise, I would say you did, actually. Your sister...she was pretty evil, from what I've heard."

"Shut up and stop being fair," Blaise replied. "I don't want to feel good about; I just killed my sister! My own fucking sister! Would you want to be commended for it? Because if you would like that, you're a sick bastard."

Zachary stood up abruptly. "I think my son and I have to be alone for a little while." Snape, Roan and Harry nodded and left quietly. Zachary turned back to Blaise. "Son, it's all right-"

"No, it's not!" Blaise choked back a sob. "She was evil and I hated her but I can't stop feeling sad. I can't not mourn her! I still love her, damn it. She was my sister. And I killed her."

Zachary came over and hugged Blaise tightly. "What you did was right. Your sister would have killed every one of us sooner or later if you hadn't stopped her. You know that, I know that, everyone knows that. And while you will struggle with this for a while, eventually you will realize what exactly you've done for this world. Just like Harry has. You've saved everyone you loved, just like he has."

Blaise wrenched himself from his father's arms and got out of his bed, snatching his wand as he left his tent. "I am not a savior!" he said to his father, who followed him.

"Blaise, sit down. Sit down now!" yelled Zachary. Blaise ignored him and left the infirmary, shaking off Hermione and Madame Pomfrey. He continued out into the main area of the camp, right outside of the infirmary tent, and gave the people milling around a glare.

"I am not a savior!" he screamed at them. "I'm not your savior; I'm not my own savior. I sure as hell never wanted to be a savior. Stop saying it, for the love of God. Stop! I am not a savior!" By the end of his speech, he had collapsed onto his knees and was screaming from the weight he'd put on his not-yet-healed leg. He rolled onto his side, clutching the cast. But as people came over to him, he crawled away from them and pulled himself up by a pole. "Stay away from me," he hissed at his father, the nurse and Hermione and then screamed at everyone. "Stay away from me!" Grabbing a stout stick off the muddy ground he slowly limped back into the infirmary tent, ignoring all offers of help. Before he went into it, he turned around and said to the people following him, "None of you can help me. None. I can't be helped and I won't let you get dragged down with me."

For a week and a half he sat in his tent and ignored everyone, refusing food and company. When he finally came out, his cast was gone--much to Madame Pomfrey's dismay he had removed it himself--and though he had a slight limp, otherwise he was in almost complete health. Four days after he had resumed gruffly speaking to people, the excavation on the ruined parts of the castle started and a day after that, the students were let out from Gryffindor tower into the sunlight.

Blaise stood in the back of the crowd against a tree as the student streamed out of the tower. Hermione was anxiously standing about fifteen feet away from him, waiting for him to come over to her, but he didn't. A figure detached itself from the crowd, ran right over to him and slammed him against the tree. Blaise let out a laugh and hugged it.

"Hannah, honestly. It's all right; you're safe now," he told the sobbing girl squeezing him tightly. Hermione watched them with pursed lips; he hadn't spoken or looked at her for nearly a week and a half.

"Blaise, I'm so glad you're all right!" Hannah said, wiping her streaming eyes. "I was so worried in that tower and when the castle collapsed I thought you must have been crushed!"

"I almost was, but I got to...er, safety, just in time," Blaise told her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "Come on, you probably haven't eaten in days, have you?" She nodded. "Then come with me and I'll get you something to eat and we'll talk."

As they started towards the food tent, Blaise glanced back behind him but Hermione had rushed off in the opposite direction. Once they had gotten to the food tent, Blaise sat Hannah down at a table and went to get them some food.

A few minutes later he returned and handed her a tray before sitting down opposite her, starting to eat. "So, how was it after the Order left?"

Hannah drank some of the pumpkin juice down before answering. "Everyone was scared," she said. "Me, especially. I was, well, I was worried about you." She blushed. "I thought you might get hurt, fighting your sister. I remembered her from the lectures last fall. She was very frightening then; I can't imagine what it was like to fight her. But mostly we kept quiet so no one would realize where we were. The ones who couldn't help making noise we put up in the highest dormitory where no one would be able to hear them from the main castle. Besides that? We just sat and ate and tried to stay calm. When the food started to go low, I stopped eating most of what I was given and gave it to the younger kids. I figured they needed it more that I did."

Blaise smiled and took a bite of chicken. "Sounds much better than what happened to me."

Hannah gave him a concerned look. "What did happen?"

"Lilithe found us and we fought. Long story very, very short, I ended up killing her by absorbing her power." Blaise poked the green mash on his plate with his fork. "What is that? I can't tell."

Hannah reached out and touched his arm. "There's something you're not telling anyone, is there?" Blaise avoided her gaze. "Blaise. I don't know you well, but I can read people a bit. You aren't telling people something. Why?"

"I don't want to worry anyone," he said.

"But how can we help you get better unless you tell us?" Hannah asked, leaning across to him.

"Maybe I don't want your help," he responded harshly, pulling his arm away and standing up. "Maybe I don't want anyone's help."

Hannah frowned and walked over to him. "Yes, you do. I know you do. Everyone wants help when they're overwhelmed. Blaise, we have to: we're human." She put her hand on his shoulder and, turning him around, leaned her head under his hanging hair to look up into his eyes. "Let me help you," she whispered.

His pupils were dilated and his expression sharpened for a moment before his face fell slack and he answered in a tone so soft she barely heard it, "Please. Help me."

"Blaise?" Hannah and Blaise's heads whipped around to see Ginny standing there, frowning. "Where's Hermione?"

Blaise's eyes darkened. "How should I know? I'm not her keeper."

Ginny's eyes flashed angrily. "No, but you are her boyfriend. Or have you forgotten that?"

Blaise turned and started to limp away. "Things change, Ginny. Be sure to tell Hermione that."

"I will, Blaise Zabini!" Ginny shouted after Blaise and Hannah. "Just you remember that!"

"Thanks, I will," he retorted before ducking out of the food tent.

Even with his slight limp, Blaise walked faster than Hannah could keep up with and she barely managed to see him disappear behind the wall of a garden right behind the greenhouses. A minute later, she caught up with him and saw him stripping his shoes and socks off and rolling up his pants legs.

"Blaise, it's too cold for wading," Hannah said.

Blaise flashed a grin at her. "Only if you don't use wands." He cast a Heating Charm over the fountain and started wading through. "Mmm.... Nice and warm. C'mon in, Hannah, it won't hurt!"

Hannah stood by the pool and stared at him walking around for a few minutes. "You really don't want to talk about it, do you?"

Blaise's grin faded. "No, I don't."

"Why not? It can't be too terrible."

"It is."

Hannah walked over to him. "Are you sure you don't want to tell me?" She reached out and touched his shoulder; he moved into her hand, craning his head. "I know you and Hermione were --are-- close. I don't want to be the cause of a break up."

Blaise sighed and climbed out of the fountain, shaking his feet dry and unrolling his pants. "Hermione and I.... It's complicated." He sat down on the bench closest to him.

"You love her." It wasn't a question.

He nodded. "Yes."

"Then why do you seem so interested in me?" Hannah blushed as she said this.

Blaise cocked his head at her and smiled. "Don't be embarrassed, Hannah; if anyone's done anything wrong, it's me. I have --had-- a girlfriend, and now I feel this...protectiveness...towards you. I want to guard you. I look at you and you seem so innocent, so sweet. Hermione isn't like that; she's learned to protect herself, to keep lookout for herself and for Harry and Ron, too. You don't have that feeling and I want to wrap my arms around you and just hold you forever to keep you safe." He reached up with one hand and touched her cheek softly.

"I'm- I'm not pretty," she said, faltering and flinching away at his touch a bit.

His eyes were a deep blue color and his hair had fallen into his eyes as he gazed intently at her. "Don't ever say that. Don't let anyone else say it, either. You're not glamorous, but men don't want glamorous when they get down to it. They want something that shines from the inside. You've got that. It's a little light that you barely notice unless you look." He brushed her hair back from her face and his face inched nearer to hers.

"Does Hermione?" Hannah whispered.

"Does Hermione what?" She could feel his hot breath on her lips.

"Does she have that light? Like you said I have?"

A smile curled over Blaise's lips. "Hermione's different. She's more of the type who thrusts her qualities in your face and then is offended when you don't --or pretend not to-- notice. It's why she and Weasley would have never worked out--he's too obtuse to notice everything she does."

"And you do?"

"Only when I want to." He tilted his head a bit more and looked more deeply into her eyes. "And you, you're more than her in some ways and in others she's more than you. You've got human caring; you care for people, no matter what. I like that. And your eyes are so expressive, so beautiful." She could feel his lips brushing hers ever so lightly and she sighed in anticipation. "You are you. And you are beautiful." He closed the distance and kissed her softly, like he was holding a delicate flower and was afraid of breaking it.

A few moments later, he pulled back from her and smiled. "That wasn't so bad, was it?"

Hannah shook her head mutely. "No. No, it wasn't." A grin spread across her face. "You're just trying to distract me, aren't you? Tell me. Tell me now, while you're happy."

Blaise raised an eyebrow at her. "Are you sure?" She nodded. "All right, then. When I absorbed my sister's power, I absorbed her memories and some of her qualities." He shook his head. "It was stupid of me to not realize that when you absorb someone's life source, you are going to absorb some of their traits, not to mention their memories." His eyes flicked behind her for a second.

"What did you see?" she whispered.

He looked at her bleakly. "They knew, the Death Eaters. They knew who I was. But only some of them knew that I was working with Dumbledore. All the rest thought I could be turned. I've been asking around for the past few days and I found out all the ones who knew I was working with Dumbledore escaped. They'll be after my blood: one of the clearest things Voldemort told them that she was present for was that if she died, I was surely responsible and therefore a dead man."

Hannah sat there in silence. "But then- How- Are you going to stay here, out of sight?"

Blaise smiled reassuringly. "I'll be fine. I'll tell you more later. It's getting dark, so you should head back to the camp and get your sleeping assignments from McGonagall." Hannah nodded and left. Blaise waited for a few moments. "You can come out now," he called to the shrubbery surrounding the fountain. "I knew you were there."

Hermione stepped out from behind a plant. "Then why the show?" she asked coldly. "Why would you tell her you loved me and then kiss her? Are you just that sick?"

Blaise laughed. "Think about it: I've just absorbed some of my sick, twisted sister's traits and dangled this girl on a chain. No, those things couldn't possibly be connected, I don't think. What do you think?"

Hermione glared at him. "You love me, and you're being just as cruel to me as you were to her."

"Equal treatment, love. It's what I'm all about."

"Don't be an ass."

"Born to it."

She sighed and sat down on the stone bench opposite to him. "I know you're you again. I know you have those traits under control; you're a control freak, you have to. I also know that the only time you wouldn't have had them under control is when you were under that rubble and searching for your sister's body. What really happened?"

"It was her life source, Hermione," Blaise whispered. "From her life. There's a certain amount of spirit attached to it, a certain amount of soul. When I was under that rubble, before I found her body, the remnant of her was controlling me. She pushed my consciousness back and took control of my body so that she would be able to get a proper burial, or at least one outside of a destroyed corridor. She found her body and she left me my body. I'll never be the same. There are...traces...of her in me. Not enough to let them control me, but some of her characteristics are blended with mine. And I don't know what they are yet."

"Cruelty," Hermione said.

"Yes. Why do you think I didn't want to be hailed as 'The Other Savior Of Wizardkind'? I'm not. I'm just a boy who murdered his sister and got away with it."

Hermione stood up, marched over to him and slapped him across the face. "Don't you ever say that. Ever. You didn't murder anyone. You performed an execution that was justified. When the evidence runs in front of the Ministry, they will prove you innocent of all charges--if indeed they deem it worthy of charges." She glanced at his neck. "Where's your charm?"

Blaise held up his hand and the last rays of the sun flashed off of a ring. "Dad brought by a ring the other day and gave it to me. More useful, and since it's not made of stone it will hold the magic longer and I'll be able to renew it myself."

Hermione nodded. "Oh. Good." All of a sudden her face went slack and then a smile bloomed. "You love me?"

Blaise grinned and pulled her down to the bench. "Could there be a doubt?"

Hermione's smile stretched even further. "Until now."

Blaise pulled her over closer until she was next to him. "That," he said simply, his nose brushing against hers, "was stupid."

~*~

They went back to the camp a few hours later and ducked into the food tent as dinner was served. Blaise saw Hannah across the room and she smiled sadly at him and nodded. He nodded back, smiling also.

"Blaise," Hermione said suddenly as they were waiting to be served, "how did you know I loved you?"

Blaise took his plate from the server and thanked him. "I just knew," he told her, cutting into his meat.

"You mean you assumed?"

Blaise glanced blandly at her. "Hermione, in case you don't remember, I am a mind reader. When I took my necklace off a few weeks ago, I could hear you loudest of all, worrying about me."

"And I was thinking that I loved you?"

Blaise tilted his head and thought for a moment. "No, but it was the feeling coming off the thought. Like it was drenched in worry, but when it got to my name it felt sort of marinated in love. Kind of fuzzy. It made my stomach flip."

Hermione smiled. "That's how I always hoped it would feel like. I'm glad it does." Blaise grinned and dug into his meat. "Blaise?"

"Yes?"

"Did you really mean what you said to Hannah?"

He gave her a cautious glance. "Mean what?"

"That you're attracted to her as well as me."

Blaise winced. "Honestly?" Hermione nodded. "Yes, I did. I love you, Hermione. But I can't deny my feelings for Hannah."

Hermione's mouth dropped. "But you just got to know her!"

He nodded. "But one of the other loudest thinkers in that castle was Hannah, wishing me to safety. When I was trapped under the rubble, she was the main reason I was able to crawl out. Without the power her thoughts gave me, I wouldn't have made it out of there alive."

Hermione bristled visibly. "And I wasn't thinking loud enough for you while I was burying people?"

"No, you weren't," Blaise retorted. "You were thinking about the people you were burying. I was in a state that if I didn't get someone thinking specifically about me, and thinking strongly, I wasn't going to make it. Hannah saved my life, Hermione."

"So what does that make me?" Hermione whispered, blinking back tears.

Blaise looked taken aback. "What do you mean? That doesn't change anything. You and I are fine. I love you, Hermione. Not Hannah. In fact, I-"

"Is this seat taken?" They looked up to see a paler, drawn-looking Draco Malfoy.

"Sit, Draco, please," Blaise said, scooting over. Draco ignored him, looking instead at Hermione.

"Is it?" he asked softly.

Hermione blinked rapidly before answering, "Yes. Go ahead, sit. You look like you haven't sat for ages."

Draco smiled a bit. "No, I haven't. Thanks." He sat down beside Hermione. "So Blaise, how is Hannah?" An unfamiliar glint was in Draco's eyes. Blaise frowned. "I hear you rescued her. How noble and self-sacrificing."

"Well, you know me," Blaise said slowly, narrowing his eyes at Draco. "Always trying something new."

"Barely anyone knows you anymore," Draco observed, politely declining the soup offered to him by the server.

"I could say the same of you, too." Blaise took the soup.

"Then I suppose we've both changed. Hermione, how are you?" Draco turned to Hermione and they both ignored Blaise for the rest of the night.

Blaise sat sullenly with his dinner, listening to Draco and Hermione talking while they ate until finally he got up and left. He went outside and stalked around for a while, heading towards the lake after a while.

He saw Harry standing by a tree, eating his soup and staring at the water. He turned around to leave, but Harry called him over. "C'mon over, Blaise. We need to talk."

They sat down together, under the tree, and Harry finished the soup and set it aside. "So you and Hermione have been arguing?"

"Yeah." Blaise picked up a rock and threw it at the lake. "And when did she and Draco get so close?"

Harry laughed. "They aren't, really. While you weren't talking to anyone, she needed someone to argue with. Ron's been spending all his time with Luna, so she couldn't with him, and she knew that I'm too busy, mostly, to stop and argue about minutiae with her. So she went over to Draco one day and started in on him about his usage of the hot water. Since then, they've sat with each other almost every meal, talking or arguing. I never thought I'd be grateful to Malfoy, but I am."

Blaise leaned against the tree. "It's just that I feel overwhelmed." He told Harry about parts of Lilithe being inside him and Harry listened patiently.

"I know how you feel," Harry said. "I feel sometimes that, now Voldemort's gone. What's my purpose-"

"It's not that," Blaise interrupted. "With some of her memories, I found out that some Death Eaters knew what I was; knew that if she failed, I would be responsible. Voldemort ordered them to kill me if she failed. And then, last week, I was asking around about the battle, about who escaped--I'm sure you heard about that." Harry nodded. "And all of the Death Eaters who escaped--every single one--knew about me. This war isn't over for me yet. I'm still in danger, Harry. Not as much as you were, but these men have nothing to live for anyway, so why shouldn't they risk it all to come after me? And what better way to try and hurt me than killing those I love?" Blaise gripped a handful of his robes and gritted his teeth. "They'd kill Hermione; I know they would."

Harry nodded. "I understand." He turned to look at Blaise. "What are you going to do?"

Blaise stared across the lake, blinking slowly. "I don't know yet."

"Can I give you some advice?"

Blaise looked at him. "Go ahead."

"I wish I had some to give to you, then," Harry said. They both laughed for a moment at that and Harry went on, "It's in times like now that I wish both Voldemort and I had died and Dumbledore survived. The people who are left need him more than they need me. The need someone to govern them fairly, not The Boy Who Lived."

"Hermione needs someone who can handle her," Blaise mused, "not a mind reading boy who is dead and doesn't know it yet."

Harry laughed again. "I could say the same for Ginny," he responded, "but she would never let me go."

They sat there for a while and Blaise listened as Harry outlined his plans for the Wizarding World, what he wanted to do for wizardkind so that they could be more prepared if anyone else like Voldemort showed up in the future.

Blaise spent the entire next day by the lake, staring out at it. Around four o'clock, Hermione came out and sat with him.

"I'm sorry about last night," she said.

"It's okay."

"I didn't understand. I know you love me, it just hurts to know you feel for someone else, too." She touched his arm tentatively.

He pulled her over to him and waited until she had settled her head on his should before he spoke. "I never want to have to lie to you. And likelihood is that Hannah will find someone and my feelings for her will fade. But I don't think I'll ever stop loving you." He squeezer her shoulders. "You remember that: I won't ever stop loving you."

"I won't forget." She looked up at him and smiled. "I have to go now, so I'll see you at dinner, all right?"

"Okay." He smiled as he watched her go.

As he sat there for the next three hours until dinner, he realized what he had to do.

Three days later, he was in his tent packing two of his travel bags when Hermione came in.

"I brought you some- What's this?" Her brow furrowed as she looked around the tent, seeing nothing, as everything was packed up. "Are you going somewhere?"

Blaise stopped and turned to her. The hands that were holding the tray she had brought for him were shaking madly. "Hermione, calm down," he started.

The tray dropped from her hands, spraying stew and crumbs everywhere. "You're leaving, aren't you!" He didn't answer her. "Tell me! Say you aren't, say you're staying here! Answer me!"

"I never want to lie to you," he said quietly to her. Her eyes filled up with tears.

"Why?" she asked. "Why are you doing this to me?"

"Hermione, it's complicated-"

"The hell it is! You're leaving me! It's very simple!" she exclaimed. "You don't love me and everything you've said these past few days was complete bullshit!" A few tears fell down her cheeks.

"Don't cry, darling," he crooned, wiping the tears from her cheeks. "Don't."

Hermione flinched away from his touch. "Explain to me Blaise. Explain how you can tell me you love me and then leave."

"Hermione, I can't! You would never understand! Don't make me hurt you," Blaise pleaded, trying to get her to look at her.

"Then make me understand!" she shouted in his face. He stepped away and his mouth fell open in a mix of rage and shock.

"Hermione, you can't understand," Blaise said, pacing a few steps. "Those Death Eaters that escaped--they want my head on a platter! I'm a dead man walking. I can't stay here."

"We'll get them," Hermione promised desperately. "Blaise, I need you. Harry needs you." She blinked back anger and tears and continued, "Hannah needs you. Everyone needs you. Stay. Please." He turned around to look into her pleading, tear-filled eyes. "Please," she whispered. "Stay. For me."

He stood still for a moment and she could see him quivering, before he walked the few steps back to her and pulled her in his arms, kissing her until they were both almost suffocated. "I can't, Hermione," he told her gently, letting her go and picking up his duffel bag that sat behind him, packed with everything that he needed to survive on his own. "I can't. I'm sorry."

Blaise walked to the door and stopped as Hermione cried out, "Please, Blaise! Please!"

"Goodbye, Hermione," he said softly. "Goodbye."

"No! Blaise, stay!" Hermione pleaded, tugging on his arm. "Please, don't leave me!"

"I can't promise that," he whispered, looking down at her, a faint smile hiding behind his grim face. "Not yet."

Then he walked out the door and she watched him Disapparate as he reached the gate. He didn't even wave goodbye, she thought numbly as she stood in the doorway to Hogwarts castle, left alone without even a final wave.

But, she thought, new hope dawning on her, he had said that he wouldn't be gone forever. That hope sparked more and she found that, as long as she could believe that, she could go on.

He wouldn't be gone forever.