The Choices We Make

THE CHOICES WE MAKE

The Choices We Make

"It is our choices ... that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities."--Albus Dumbledore, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

Prologue

1973

He sat quietly in the corner of the Gryffindor common room. In his hands was a fifth year transfiguration text. At this late hour, the expansive room was empty except for this one boy. His pale eyes skimmed across the page as he finished his homework. Tomorrow would be a full moon, and he didn't want school to ruin that fun. Anyway, he had a lot on his mind. He glanced down at the letter that had arrived by owl post just that evening.

He was so absorbed in his work that he didn't even look up when a dormitory door creaked open and someone came down the stairs.

"Don't worry," he growled. "I'm coming already!" James had only come downstairs four times that night to bug him about sleep.

"Sirius Black!" said a decidedly female voice. "Don't you dare take that tone with me."

"Andromeda!" Sirius' eyes widened and his head snapped up. At the base of the stairs stood an attractive, dark-haired girl, only a year younger than himself. His favorite cousin, Andromeda walked over to the sofa he sat on and plopped down beside him. Her hair was up in curlers.

She arched an eyebrow at him and eyed his work. "This is a first," she purred, her lips curing into a smile. "You're doing your homework instead of Remus. What's the occasion?"

Sirius made a face at her. "Ha. Ha. I'll have you know that I work hard for every answer Remus gives me."

Andromeda just rolled her eyes as he laughed. But even his laughter didn't quite hide the strain in his eyes. "This stuff isn't hard, really, when I do it. I just need practice. I need high marks on my OWLs."

"Since when?"

Sirius glared at her, but like a true Black, she didn't back down. "Come on, Sirius. You've never cared about grades. Now suddenly you do?"

"If I want to get a job--"

"Since when do you care about that either?" Andromeda looked skeptical. "What happened to that plan you had when you were eight where you'd mooch off of Aunt Medea for the rest of your life?" Her eyes were teasing now.

Sirius glanced back at the letter. "Give me a break. Mum won't give me a cent. Especially not if she can spend it on perfect Regulus. He was accepted to Durmstrang, you know." The bitterness cut the air like a knife, leaving a momentary rift between them.

Andromeda's eyes traveled to the letter as things mentally began falling into place. "So, that's what this is about, huh? You do realize that your little brother is a stupid git, don't you?"

Sirius slammed his book shut, his grey eyes flashing. "Well, he's the stupid git my parents care about. He can do no wrong. He's in the school they want. He always made top marks before he transferred out of Hogwarts. He was even a Slytherin. He's the best bloody thing in the world." In a fit of frustration, Sirius took his text and threw it at the far wall. It hit with a bang. He just sat breathing hard for a moment. Then, in a softer voice, he said, "And what do they have with me?" He stood up as though to give his cousin a clear view of how flawed he was.

It hurt her to see him like this. When they'd been growing up, he was her hero. When her sisters had tormented her, he'd always defended her. He'd even beaten his own brother up once, when Regulus had hurt her. Sirius had always been the strong, handsome, intelligent one. And somehow, coming from that family, he'd been the decent one, too. That was a feat all on its own.

He'd seemed perfect. Unbreakable.

She clenched her fists as she looked at the frustrated, hurt boy in front of her. And that blasted family of his seemed to finally be breaking him little by little. They were destroying their own son, because he wasn't one of them.

"Sirius..." she started.

He shook his head and sat down, burying his face in his hands. "I know what you're going to say, so don't." He looked up, taking a deep breath. "I can't undo what's been done. I can't improve my old grades or change my sorting, but I sure as hell can ace my OWLs. I can be what they want. I can be as good as Regulus. Better, even." There was a gleam in his eyes.

"Sure you can," Andromeda snapped. "Of course you can be as good as Regulus and Narcissa and Bella and the others. God, Sirius, can't you see that you're better than them already? They're the ones who should be like you, not the other way around."

A look of confusion flickered across his face, and Andromeda went with it. "You don't need them, Sirius. Look around you. You have me. You have your friends. You don't have to put up with those people." She motioned with disgust toward the letter."

"They're my family," Sirius snapped.

"We're your family! James, Remus, Peter and I! You talked about running away last year. Why not just do it? James said he'd help..."

"No." His voice was flat and held a finality that frightened her. His eyes were emotionless. "They aren't my family. They're friends. Friends change. We'll probably never see each other again after Hogwarts. And you'll run off with Ted. And I'll be alone." He stood up and, scooping up his homework and letter, walked to the boy's dormitory. He paused at the stairs and glanced back at her. "The difference between friends and family is that the Marauders and I... we don't matter as much to each other. I wouldn't die for them."

And with that, he disappeared up the stairs.

Silent tears flowed down Andromeda's face. She tried to tell herself that he was just tired and frustrated. He'd get over it and come to his senses...

But then why did she feel like she'd spent the last fifteen minutes fighting for his soul?

And why did she feel like she'd lost...?