In Your Head

Another head hangs lowly
Child is slowly taken
And the violence causes silence
Who are we mistaking?

They watched the whole thing. They couldn't tear their eyes away; it was mesmerizing. It wasn't that any of them wanted to watch Sirius go down. Remus supposed it was just human nature to want to see exactly what it was like to fall.

They knew he didn't do it. Harry, Ron...all the Weasleys, really, Hermione, Dumbledore, Remus... even Severus, somewhere within him, knew that Sirius Black was innocent. "Desperate times call for desperate measures. We said that we would do it when we found him, and he's here. With all the violence, we can't take any chances," said Fudge. Harry and Hermione themselves had to spend a night in Azkaban after it was discovered that they had been the ones to set Sirius free the first time, but now they were all kept out by a magical barrier and there was nothing they could do but watch.

Dumbledore's head hung low, his silver hair coving his face, his beard nearly touching the ground. Harry could have sworn he saw a tear fall from the sparkling blue eyes he'd become so familiar with. Remus was sure he did and patted Dumbledore on the back as he began to tear up as well. Dumbledore looked up, slightly startled, trying not to show his pain, trying to be as strong as everyone thought he could be. He swallowed hard. "I can't even protect them from our own side, Remus. If I can't stop the ones that are supposed to be with me, what the hell am I going to do in the face of opposition?" The old man's hands shook. "What the hell am I going to do?" he repeated, his voice cracking slightly.

Remus had no reply, but looked on as Fudge walked in and looked at Sirius, who was chained down by charmed locks to a steel chair. Sirius' eyes showed not fear, but disappointment. "How many of the people on our side do you have to harm before you see that it's not changing anything, Fudge?" Sirius murmured, trying to ignore the tears he saw from the people on the other side.

"How many innocent people did you have to kill before you saw that your best friend's death was your own fault, Sirius?"

But you see it's not me
It's not my family
In your head in your head
They are fighting

Sirius shook his head. "Is that what you really believe? Is that what you think now, Fudge? Even after what I've done for our side?" he snorted in incredulity. "I blame myself only for giving them over to Pettigrew."

Remus bit his lip. "He's still brave. I don't believe him. He's still just as brave, just as stubborn," he said, swallowing back the tears and screams he wanted so dearly to let go as he watched the only other true Marauder's final moments.

Dumbledore was silent for a few moments before he could find it in himself to reply. "I don't think he'll ever lose that, Remus. No matter what they do to him... it'll be there somewhere."

Remus shook his head. "Everything will be there. The problem is, after they suck out his soul, we won't know where 'there' is, now will we?"

Dumbledore sighed. "Don't be bitter now, Remus. Don't change... we need your spirit now, more than ever."

"Don't you think they'll go after me next?"

Dumbledore hushed him. "The children," he warned. Harry, Ron, Hermione, and a few other people sat, watching as well. Hermione was crying and Ron was comforting her, but Harry was completely silent, in a state of shock like no other.

With their ties and their bonds
and their bombs and their guns
In your head

In your head

They are crying

Sirius shook his head. "It's all old loyalties with you, Fudge. Don't you have any instincts?"

"M y instincts tell me to bring in the Dementors and destroy you like the dog you enjoy acting like, Sirius," he said coldly.

All of a sudden, three hooded figures entered the enclosed area. Harry reached for his wand, wanting dearly to cast a Patronus before he remembered that, with the magical barrier, he might as well have been a million miles away. He almost wished he was when he began to hear his mother.

Remus made eye contact with Sirius just before the Dementors advanced on him. Sirius' face wore an unreadable expression. "What's in your head, Padfoot?" Remus mumbled, choking on his words. "Where are you now?"

In your head...
In your head...
Zombie

Zombie

Zombie
What's in your head?
In your head...
Zombie

Zombie

Zombie

"Any last words?" Fudge said, almost amused.

"Several." He did his best to look past the Dementors and into the eyes of each person in the room before he spoke. "Be strong, everyone. Live well, and remember that fear is a waste of time," he said, swallowing hard. "Everything else is in my will. Make sure my words aren't wasted."

Every eye was on Sirius, who looked ahead, as if into space, as the tallest of the Dementors lowered its hood.

Another mother's breaking heart is taking over

When the violence causes silence
We must be mistaken
It's the same old thing since 1916
In your head

In your head
They're still fighting

A few looked away, a few cried harder, and yet a few kept their eyes in Sirius as the creature slowly drew his soul away from him. A few people including Hermione, Mrs. Weasley, and Harry had to be taken from the room, all but Harry for they hysterical crying and torment they were going through by watching, Harry for his delirium and his attempts to run through the magical barrier.

Remus watched as Sirius' eyes rolled back in his head and he fell to the ground. He crawled around for a few moments, the fight to find where his soul had gone still in him. He finally caved, slumping into a corner, making incoherent noises. "He's gone," Remus said, shaking. Fudge stepped out of the barrier to the side where a few scattered people stood in disbelief of what they'd just seen become of Sirius Black. Remus growled and took a few steps forward, advancing on Fudge. "How could you? How COULD you?"

Dumbledore pulled him back. "Don't, Remus. Don't you remember how it was before? We had all turned on each other. We can't afford to do that again, no matter HOW much the minister decides to ignore the facts." The old man glared at Fudge, who shrugged.

"Sirius was powerful He was a danger..."

"To Voldemort, maybe!" Remus spat angrily. "I can't BELIEVE you... you destroyed him." He broke down, falling to his knees, then slumping back and crying. "He was the only one left..." he mumbled. "The only one." He put his hand up, pressing against the barrier, watching Sirius crawl around mindlessly.

With their ties and their bonds
and their bombs and their guns
In your head

in your head

they are dying...

"What's in his head now? What's he to think? What keeps him alive?" Remus wondered aloud. "Is he always going to remember the thing he never did?" He swallowed hard. "Sirius shouldn't have to watch them die all over again. Sirius was good..."

"Sirius is still good, Remus." Dumbledore said, softly. "Sirius will always be good. He'll always be the same. Fudge stopped him before he could even come close to being any other way."

"So he never went bad. He never had the opportunity to go bad- not that he would have taken it. Big deal... now he has the opportunity to watch his whole life over again and again, never understanding exactly why." Remus wiped his eyes, a pained expression on his face. "I'd rather see him go Dark, for Christ's sakes."

"Don't say that," Dumbledore said, shaking his head. "He's still Sirius, somewhere in his head. "

They all got on the boat away from Azkaban, one by one. Remus sat by Harry, whose thoughts were most similar to his. "I always felt safe around him. He was my protector, you know? I almost felt like I had a family when I was with him." Harry said, staring out at the water.

"I think he protected everyone, Harry."

Dumbledore came over and sat with them. "Are you both alright? I know it can't be easy... it's not easy on me either," he sighed. "He had so many stories to tell..."

"But they're all locked up now," Remus said softly. "They've turned Sirius into nothing more than a zombie."

In your head...
In your head...
Zombie

Zombie

Zombie
What's in your head?
In your head...

Zombie

Zombie

Zombie