All of This

Chapter Two: Unrequited

    “Ginevra Weasley, wake up! You’re going to miss breakfast!”

    It was very unlike Ginny to sleep in, especially on a day as exciting as this one was sure to be. She was sure it was because of her trying night, and the fact that it took her two hours of tossing and turning before she was actually able to get back to sleep. This day was always an exciting day; September the first, when she would return to Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry. She didn’t really know how she felt about going back. On one hand, she would be with her old friends and be learning a lot of new magic, but then, she would have to face where all her nightmares took place.

    She struggled to pry open her eyes, and moaned as her fatigued muscles ached. After a few stretches, she pulled on a pair of her brother Bill’s old pajamas overtop her nightgown and headed downstairs, checking how she looked in a mirror along the way. Her hair was a deep red, long and straight down to her waist. Her gold flecked brown eyes were red from lack of sleep, and she had large under eye circles.

    “Screw it all,” she said under her breath as she stomped down the stairs. The magically elongated mahogany dining table was already filled with people, and she noticed that Fred and George were sitting on pulled up stools. The whole family was here for the summer, Bill and Charlie, and Percy, too. Percy had begged the family the year before to forgive him after he realized he was being completely foolish. Also Harry and Hermione Granger were staying for the summer, so the Burrow was quite bustling with activity. She noticed that her mother, Molly Weasley, was already hurrying about to get breakfast finished, and that her brother Ron’s owl Pigwidgeon was flying about the kitchen hooting with excitement. With eleven people in the house, it was just another regular day at the Burrow.

    Molly caught sight of Ginny and gave her a cross look.

    “Nice of you to finally wake up,” she scolded as Ginny quietly sat down in the chair Harry had saved for her. She refused to look at him, and tried to focus on the surrounding conversations to avoid any contact whatsoever. She knew she’d hurt Harry once more the night before, and she couldn’t quite bear herself this moment. She could’ve done it.

    Much to her dismay, there was no one for her to talk to, as everyone was already immersed in their own topics. Bill, Charlie, Percy and her father were arguing about politics, which she had no knowledge-or interest in, Fred and George were busily trying to slip one of their new joke shop creations- The truth tart into Percy’s coffee mug. Their new candy had about the same effect as ingesting five bottles of fireball whisky; the victim would start divulging their most shameful and embarrassing secrets. They were doing a fair job of not being noticed, but Ginny, having lived with them for her whole life, could automatically sense when they were trouble-making, which was just about always. Beside Harry, Ron and Hermione were talking about the subjects they were going to take this year, leaving Ginny stranded.

    She was used to being the one left out, the one standing on the sidelines, and to be truthful, it didn’t really bother her anymore. But she wished Harry would stop looking at her. She wished he would take his hand off her knee and she wished she could still love him. She wished he would stop being so oblivious to how unhappy she was and she wished she could end it all, but she was too weak to break this off. Who would she be if she weren’t with Harry? She would go from being Ginny Weasley, Harry Potter’s girlfriend and gainer of some attention back to Ginny Weasley, nobody. And for thinking like this she hated herself.

    “Croissant, dear?” Her mother’s voice intruded upon her thoughts. Ginny looked up from her plate, now filled with bacon and eggs, to Molly’s questioning expression.

    “Umm, no thanks,” she muttered.

    Breakfast continued in the same monotonous fashion, with Ginny and Harry being the only silent ones in the rush of excitement for a new term at Hogwarts. After what seemed like fifty years of tedious agony, Molly Weasley announced that it was time to pack up their things for the drive to King’s Cross station and platform nine and three quarters.

    She didn’t know why she was so uncomfortable walking through the station this year. The year before she had been delirious, grinning from ear to ear because Harry Potter was holding her hand. Now she was having trouble keeping her seemingly permanent frown from creeping up onto her face. Harry was gripping her hand protectively as they pushed their way through crowds of empty faces. The station was a blur. Somehow, Harry had managed to drag her away from her family to be alone with her, so she wouldn’t have any excuses to ignore him.    She had noticed worried glances from everybody all summer. Why, all of a sudden, had the once vibrant Ginny become so lifeless and silent? Sometimes she just wished that everyone would leave her alone to deal with everything. There was no one to talk about it to, they couldn’t understand. How could anyone possibly understand something of this magnitude? How could anyone possibly understand that this man had taken everything away from her, and despite it all... He was still completely on her mind.

    So she remained quiet. She remained lost within her thoughts, even though she caught Harry constantly giving her nervous glances. She thought about the thing that troubled her most, and that feeling in the pit of her stomach, that agonizing, falling feeling stayed with her. She noticed Harry tightening his grip on her hand, and she noticed how many people were staring at her. But she didn’t care, for once in her life, she simply didn’t care.

***

    Hermione Granger had never thought of herself as a jealous person, but today, it seemed that all those feelings that she had kept carefully stowed away were surfacing, and the green monster was taking her over. She’d always been friends with Ginny Weasley, she had once been her best-and only girlfriend. But the year before Ginny had changed. The once happy-go-lucky girl was now sullen and introverted, and constantly looked sad. Hermione knew that it had something to do with the year before, when she had gone missing for a week and been found pale, shaking, and bruised. She told everyone that she couldn’t remember anything that happened, but from the look of immense terror in her eyes, Hermione knew that she remembered every detail with perfect precision, and the fact that she wouldn’t tell anyone about it scared her.

    At first she had done as everyone else had done, doted on her, tried to take care of the poor girl, but after awhile she grew tired of it. This stunt was typical of Ginny. After years of being ignored by her family, she was an attention hound, and relished in being in the spotlight. This was why Hermione thought she was acting so sullen, and honestly, what could have happened that could have changed a girl so drastically? This was also why Hermione believed Ginny had started dating Harry. Harry was the captain of the Quidditch team, very attractive, and everyone loved him. So when Ginny and he started dating him, she became Hogwarts’ little sweetheart, and everybody loved them together. She was the poster girl for perfection. She had grown much taller, and after once being a little on the chunky side, had thinned out and gained womanly qualities that were admirable to anyone. She was beautiful, happy, and popular. Perfect.

    So why would she ever wanted to end anything with Harry? When before she was nothing, and now she had everything that anyone could want, and even though she felt ashamed to admit it, Hermione wished more than anything that she was her. She saw how Harry was now. She was his best friend, she knew he was unhappy, and she knew that he smoked up every chance he could get to escape from everything that troubled him, and she honestly thought that she could change that. If only he would wake up and see that the girl who could make him happy was right here, and her heart belonged to him.

    “So I told him to shut the hell up or else I’d knock his face in one!” Ron exclaimed from her left, breaking her train of thought. Of course, Ron was over-exaggerating about a fight he’d gotten in with some muggle over the summer to Seamus Finnaginn, who had joined them when they’d met at the entrance of King’s cross. Seamus, though he knew of Ron’s overactive imagination, seemed impressed, so Hermione shut out her two classmates and focused on observing Harry and Ginny, even though she felt like an obsessive stalker.

    Harry was grasping her hand like his life depended on it, and glaring at any guy who even looked at Ginny, while Ginny walked slowly, not even looking at Harry. Hermione sighed to herself. If only she’d made her move on Harry the year before, things might be different now. Harry might never be as sad as he was now.

    Hermione hated admitting how much of a bitch she’d become since Ginny and Harry started dating. She now despised a girl that was once her friend, and was constantly involved in her deluded daydream of “how things should be.” She didn’t know what happened to the rational girl she once was, and now, it seemed she was forever trapped in her bitter rage against Hogwarts’ favorite couple; the love that should’ve been hers.