Marked

"You're sure of this?" Dumbledore asked. "He's learned everything about you?"

Harry nodded. "Voldemort..." He paused and glanced at Augusta Longbottom. Then his eyes drifted around the room to Tonks, Kingsley Shacklebolt, Sirius and his mother. None of them had ever heard him describe what was going on with Neville in detail and Harry didn't want to worry them--especially Neville's grandmother--any more than he had to.

"Neville's still being tortured, isn't he?" Augusta asked. She wiped a hand beneath her eyes. "But he's standing up to it."

Harry nodded. "After a while he wasn't able to block his thoughts anymore, but physically they haven't done anything he couldn't take." Harry heard Hermione suck in a quick breath behind him and turned, raising an eyebrow at her. The last thing she needed to do was hint that he was lying about what was happening to Neville, however much she felt he needed to tell everyone the truth. In spite of her assertions that they all had to share the burden, Harry knew no one really needed to know the extent of the torture Neville was suffering. His mother especially did not need to hear about the situation he was still willing to go into. It would be hard enough for her to let go without fear of what might happen to him before he died.

"Did anyone mention where they might be?" Dumbledore asked, drawing Harry's attention back to him.

Harry shook his head. "Voldemort was just concerned with getting information from Neville. There wasn't much talking beyond that." Just screaming from Neville after the interrogation was done. Bellatrix had used a spell Harry had never heard of--one that made Neville feel as if his skin were on fire. He'd spent nearly an hour clawing at his skin as he tried to rip it off and screaming his throat raw before he finally passed out. Harry had suffered every moment with him, finally waking in tears and unable to explain to his mother that he almost hoped Neville would die so he wouldn't have to suffer further.

"We've searched every house we could find with a connection to Death Eaters in the past week," Kingsley said, "with no sign of any of them. When they all disappear like this, it's likely they're holed up in the same place, preparing for something."

Tonks cleared her throat. "I know you don't want to draw attention to this, but I think we may have to tell the Prophet that Voldemort's back. Someone may have seen something, but we'll never find out if the public at large is in the dark."

"I am inclined to agree with you," Dumbledore said. "If Harry cannot give us any new information within the next few days, we will have no choice--even if it puts the entire magical community into a further state of panic. More so than the murders have already done."

"Do you really think going to the Daily Prophet will get you closer to finding out where Neville is?" Augusta asked.

"At this point, I am willing to consider any course of action that allows us to find him and get him out of this situation," Dumbledore said. He stood and nodded at the table at large. "If there is nothing else, I'd like to speak with Harry in private before I leave."

Frowning at the quick dismissal, Augusta Longbottom stood from the dining room table and came around to where Harry sat. "If you can find a way to get a message to my grandson," she whispered, "tell him we're all pulling for him. Send him any strength you can." Before Harry could respond, she walked briskly through the doorway and into Sirius's sitting room, where the two Aurors were preparing to leave.

Harry turned to Dumbledore. "I don't have anything else to tell you, if that's what you're wondering."

"You may know more than you realize." The Minister offered him a small, sad smile. "Would you mind if I put you to sleep briefly? Miss Granger may remain here if you wish."

Harry glanced over his shoulder at Hermione. She was frowning at the Minister, but softened her expression as she looked down at Harry. "It's up to you."

Harry nodded. He frowned as he watched Lily and Sirius cross the room behind Dumbledore, hand-in-hand as they left.

"Do whatever you think can help," Harry said, bringing his gaze back to the Minister. "I don't think Neville can take much more of this."

"He's suffering," Lily stated. She crossed her arms and looked up at Sirius. "He'll hardly talk to me about anything and it's driving me crazy. You have to do something."

"Lily, what do you expect me to do? Harry is going through something very intense right now and--"

"I know that!" She took a deep breath and lowered her voice. After a moment's thought, she waved her wand and the door to the sitting room closed behind Sirius. "He isn't talking to anyone but Hermione and it's scaring me. What if--what if he's thinking about ending it all just to get away from the nightmares? Or what if he knows something that's happening to Neville that will eventually get them both killed? The longer that boy is missing the harder it is to trust that the Minister is not going to see them both dead and my son--"
"Your son accepted that possibility weeks ago," Sirius whispered. Lily began shaking and Sirius pulled her into his arms. "I know this is difficult, but you have to let him deal with it his own way."

"Deal with it?" She pulled back to look into Sirius's eyes. "He's barely sleeping, eating only when we force him and hardly says two words that aren't about torture or death. He is not dealing with anything. It's been forced upon him. He may just find it easier not to deal at all."

"Harry is not suicidal."

"How do you know?" Lily asked in a small voice. "I can hardly get two feet from him before I feel like he's falling apart right in front of me. I want to talk to him, but not if it'll make him have a nervous breakdown. Hermione is not helping. She never leaves his side."

"You wouldn't either, if you had a choice about it."

"I just...please talk to him." Lily wiped at her eyes with the sleeves of her shirt. "I just want to be sure that he hasn't given up. For some reason, Albus still believes there is hope they will win and I want Harry to hold onto that."
"I want you to do the same," Sirius replied. "If anything can give him strength, it's knowing that you haven't given up either."

"Of course I haven't." Lily leaned up and kissed Sirius on the cheek. "I'm going to check on Raven. She has to be wondering why I left her with a sitter so early this morning and I need to give my excuses."

"I'll talk to him," Sirius said. "You get some rest while you're there."

Lily smiled as she reached into the small pot of Floo powder on the mantel. "There'll be time for rest after all this is over and done with." With that, she stepped into the fireplace and disappeared behind a cloud of bright green smoke.

"Was that my mum leaving?"

Sirius turned to see Harry in the doorway, Hermione standing just behind him. "Yes, she went to check on your sister. Hopefully, she'll get some rest while she's at home."

"She has been running herself ragged, hasn't she?"

"It doesn't surprise me," Harry said to Hermione over his shoulder. "She's got a lot to deal with about now."

"We all do, especially you," Sirius said, stepping closer. Sirius placed a hand on Harry's shoulder. "Would you allow me a word in private?" He attempted a smile as the boy looked up at him. "It's important."

"No," Harry responded in a low voice.

Sirius blinked hard. "Excuse me?"

"Harry is very tired," Hermione said. She moved closer to Harry and slipped an arm around his. "He didn't get very much sleep last night." She began tugging at his arm. "Maybe we should go upstairs so you can get some rest."

Harry said nothing, but let Hermione lead him out of the room and up the stairs. They were in his bedroom with the door closed when he spoke. "You didn't have to do that."

Hermione frowned and locked the door. "Of course I did. You looked like you wanted to hit him right there."

"Can you blame me?" Harry asked. He sat down on the bed and ran a hand through his hair. "You saw the way they were acting this morning, right? The way he kept putting his hands on her--we never should've left them alone last night. Who knows what they got up to."

"Nothing," Hermione assured him. "I went downstairs not too long after we'd seen them and your mum had already left."

"That doesn't mean they've never...done more." Harry slammed a fist onto the bed. "I can't believe this is happening. That's probably why he wanted to talk to me, to tell me what's going on. To get my blessing, as if he needed it before."

"I think they're both just worried about you," Hermione said.

"Did what they were doing last night seem like they were thinking about me?"

"It didn't seem like much of anything, to be honest," Hermione responded. Harry frowned at her assessment. "Look, I know you're worried that he might take advantage of her--"

"He is," Harry interrupted. "You can't deny the truth of what we've seen."

"Don't you think your mother is much more aware of what she's doing now after all she went through with Professor Snape?"

"I think she's too worried about me to be aware of much of anything," Harry said. He fell back onto the bed and looked up at the ceiling. "She's been taken in by him and it's my fault. Again."

"You can't blame yourself for your mother's choices, then or now," Hermione said. "Besides that, Sirius is a good person. I don't think he'll try to take advantage of her. Didn't you say how much he cared for your parents before? That he said he would've died to save them?"

"He could be different now."

"I thought you said everyone was basically the same as in your past, except for Neville." Hermione sat next to Harry and leaned over him until she was blocking his view of the ceiling. "You have enough to worry about without adding this to it. Trust that your mother can take care of herself."

"But if something happens to her because of me..."

"Nothing will happen to her," Hermione whispered. She lowered herself to the bed and curled up against his side. Harry turned to face her.

"Promise me, if anything happens to me, you'll help her. My mum and my sister."

"You never had to ask. I'll do anything I can to help them," Hermione promised, not bothering to assure Harry that he would be fine. He nodded and then moved to kiss her. Hermione offered a token protest, but didn't push Harry away as his hands slipped over her and their clothes fell to either side of the bed.

Voldemort lay in bed with Bellatrix at his side, a rare genuine smile touching his lips. It was there, just beneath the surface. He'd felt it the night before as he'd tortured the boy. He felt it more now. The energy that thrummed beneath his fingertips. The power that surged behind his every moment, more discernable now than it had been since he'd been restored to a human body with even the most powerful of strengthening solutions to aid him.

The boys were the key. He would not die at their hands as had been predicted but be restored to full power at their deaths. More. He would have more power than he could have ever imagined. It was only a matter of bringing them together and finishing what fate had started. The beginnings of his full rise to power.

He could live forever in moments like this. With Hermione moaning beneath him, blurring his name into a sea of sounds, Harry felt himself become lighter as he lost himself within her. The tension, the sorrow, the pain he felt all became a distant memory as he gave himself over to the pure joy he felt being with her. He covered her lips with his and they breathed in unison. Hermione moaned his name again and Harry cried out wordlessly in response, words lost to him.

There was a bang and then a scream from the doorway. A momentary panic froze Harry in place. He saw Hermione's eyes widen over his shoulder and closed his own. He heard her curse softly before he turned over and spotted his mother in the doorway, wand in hand, her mouth drawn in anger.

"How could you?" Lily asked, pointing her wand at the two of them. "I thought I could trust you." She put a hand over her mouth as she watched them draw further apart. Sirius came up behind her and frowned when he spotted the two teenagers in the bed. Without a word, he put an arm around Lily's shoulder and led her away from the doorway.

"She's going to kill us," Harry said after a few seconds.

"She's going to kill me," Hermione corrected him as she sat up. "You didn't see the look on her face at first. I can tell she blames me."

Harry slid across the bed and reached for his pants on the floor. "I don't see how she could blame you for anything. There's nothing to assign blame for. We wanted to be together. There's nothing wrong with it."

"Except that we promised her we wouldn't do anything," Hermione said. She slid to the other side of the bed and began reaching for her own clothes. "She's never going to trust me now."

"Hermione, you don't have anything to worry about. I'm going to talk to her," Harry said. "If she was worried about you seducing me--"
"You think explaining to her that it was your idea the first time is going to make her feel better?" Hermione asked. She crossed her arms as Harry headed towards the bedroom door. "No amount of talking is going to help."

"Yes it can," Harry said. "She has to understand that I need both of you and we're old enough to know what we're doing."

"She'll never see it that way," Hermione whispered as Harry slipped through the doorway.

When he reached the bottom of the stairs, he approached the sitting room slowly, listening for signs that his mother had calmed from her initial reaction. Before he could knock on the door, it swung open from the inside. Harry stepped through the doorway and immediately reached a hand out to his mother.

"Mum, I can explain. We just--"

Lily put a hand up to stop his pending speech. "I can't. Not now." Without meeting her son's eyes, she brushed past him. Harry heard her stomping up the stairs. When he turned to follow, the door slammed in his face and sealed with a loud squelch and brief white glow.

Harry turned back. "Sirius, I need to--"
"Do you have any idea how much you've upset your mother?" Sirius asked. "Doesn't Lily have enough to deal with without walking in on the two of you?"

"That's rich," Harry responded. "You are not my father, in spite of whatever you've got going with my mother now."

Sirius frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"We saw you yesterday, kissing my mother over there," he said, gesturing to the sofa. "You have some nerve lecturing me about what I'm doing with Hermione. Are you any better than Snape was? You weren't waiting for him to die, but you didn't wait for her sheets to cool either."

Before he could continue, Sirius hit Harry with a Silencing Charm. Frowning as he approached the teenager, he slipped his wand into his pocket, grabbed Harry by the shirt with both hands, and pulled him close until their noses nearly touched. "Don't you ever compare me to that slime again. I would never dare hurt your mother and you damn well better understand that if you're going to stay in my home. You will not disrespect either of us like that again or I'll get your mother's permission to knock some sense into you the hard way."

He released Harry and took several steps back. Sirius ran a hand through his hair and reached for his wand. He took several moments to calm himself before his eyes met Harry's across the room. "Can we talk now? Like adults?" At Harry's nod, he removed the spells from Harry and the door behind him.

"You need to know that what happened with Lily last night was not unusual."

"You've kissed her before?" Harry asked. He was struggling to keep his voice even. Difficult considering that he wanted to do nothing more than hit his godfather.

"Well y--that's not my point," Sirius said. "The past few weeks have been difficult for everyone involved, you and Lily especially."

"What my mum needs is a friend, nothing more."

"Then you understand exactly what's going on between us," Sirius said. "Your mother needs to feel connected to someone right now. I'm willing to let her lean on me if she needs to. But that's it. She needs the support. Better me than someone who would take advantage of her."

"But the way she kissed you," Harry said.

"Nothing more than an empty gesture. I don't know how much you saw, but she apologized after because she knows it makes me uncomfortable," Sirius said. "She has done it before, but it never meant anything more than it did last night. Lily does not wish to have any type of intimate relationship with me, nor I her. She just wants to be close to someone who understands. Just as I'm sure part of the reason you and Hermione have grown so close is that she needs to feel close to you after losing someone for whom she cared very much."

"So, what you're saying is that your relationship with my mum is about as serious as my relationship with Hermione," Harry stated, his voice flat.

"No, that's not what I meant," Sirius said. "She and I have been closer than ever lately because she is going through a traumatic time. I'm sure Hermione--"

"She loves me," Harry said. "It's not just because she lost...the other one."

"Of course she does," Sirius remarked. "I don't doubt the two of you have very strong feelings towards one another. You need someone to support you as well. I just want you to understand that getting close to someone under such intense emotional circumstances doesn't always lend itself to the best type of decision making. I think what Lily regrets most is not seeing Snape for who he was when she was at her lowest, though she was in no shape to do so. That is her fear for you. Not that Hermione will hurt you on purpose," he said, fending off Harry's objection.

"But that neither of you really knows what you're doing at this point and how you'll feel about it months, or even years from now. Look, you've already slept together and that's something you can't take back. What you can do is be completely honest about your feelings. I know at your age, it's difficult to be aware of how what you're doing will affect someone else, but you should at least try to be respectful of each other."

Harry frowned and crossed his arms.

"I would tell you not to have sex again, but I know how much good that would do at this point," Sirius said. "I can only urge you to take every precaution. And I can tell you that whatever you're feeling about each other now may change drastically if you live through this ordeal--there is nothing wrong with that. If that should happen, if you and Hermione have difficulty being together after this is over, you're welcome to talk to me. I'm not trying to replace James and I never would. But if you need someone, I can be your friend. If anyone can understand what it's like to get in over one's head, it's me."

"Right. I'll keep that in mind," Harry said, averting his eyes. "I need to rescue Hermione. I bet Mum's tearing into her pretty badly about now." Without waiting for Sirius to comment, he turned and made his way upstairs.

Hermione had just finished putting her clothes on when she felt the presence in the doorway. She turned and her heart skipped a beat at the expression on Lily's face. "I can explain," she began, taking a step forward. "We--"

"You don't have to explain a thing to me." Lily pulled the door closed, walked into the room and stopped at the foot of the bed. Her gaze went over the rumpled sheets before returning to the nervous teenager in front of her.

"I knew you were hiding something," Lily said. "You could barely look at me when you got here. I should have guessed it straight off. Let me try now. You waited, what, a week? More? Then you went back to convincing him you love him and the two of you belong together. You toss that word around easier than confetti at a party. If I'd known the first time you told my son you loved him that you'd trade him over for his twin within weeks without so much as a token tear, I'd have let your parents pull you out of Hogwarts the minute they'd made up their minds to do so. If the other Harry were still here, I'm sure he'd find your definition of love leaves something to be desired."

"Of course I love them both!" Hermione screamed, frustration at not defending herself weeks before finally making her composure crack. "They are two different boys and we have two different relationships."

"Right," Lily responded. "I should've known you were the type to--"
"The type of person to what? To love him exactly for who is and not want him to be someone he's not? To feel for him because he grew up without love?" Hermione asked. "Or am I merely the type who will love him despite what other people will think of me, no matter how wrong they are, because loving him is more important than other people's approval?"

"Don't make yourself out to be some sort of angel here," Lily said. "I could have you arrested. You may have just turned sixteen, but Harry is still under the age of consent."

Hermione's eyes widened. "Arrested? You have got to be kidding. I didn't force him to do anything." She crossed her arms. "And, biologically speaking, if he hadn't time traveled he would've turned sixteen by now. You may not be happy about what we've done, but acting like I'm some sort of criminal proves nothing."

"Your words prove that you won't take responsibility for your actions, regardless of what I have to say about it," Lily said.

"I am responsible for my part in our relationship," Hermione said. "But Harry made the choice to be with me. I didn't force him. I didn't offer myself to him in some lurid way and there is nothing wrong with us being together."

"You would see it that way."

"Of course I do," Hermione shouted. "I love him. We both do. He loves both of us. Why can't you just accept that? Why make things harder than they have to be right now?"

Before Lily could respond, the door opened behind her and Harry stepped into the room.

"Don't stop on my account," Harry said. "I could hear you most of the way down the stairs."

"There is nothing else to say," Lily responded. She watched as Harry crossed the room and put an arm around Hermione. "You've obviously made up your minds to do whatever you want regardless of what I have to say about it."

"Mum, I wish you'd try to understand," Harry pleaded. "I know what you said to Hermione before Snape's funeral. You don't want us to be together, but it's not what you think. This is right for us. It's not like what was happening before--"

"This is not about what you think is right or wrong or what you think I want for you," Lily interrupted. She looked at Hermione. "I promised your parents I would take care of you. I told them I would look out for you when they were worried and they trusted me to keep you both safe."

"You don't have to keep us safe from each other," Hermione interrupted. "There's nothing wrong with--"

"You don't get it," Lily said. Her voice had lost most of it's hard edge. She lowered her eyes to the floor. "They were scared of losing you to something they couldn't stop you from doing. I see what's coming after my son every day and I can't stop it." Lily looked up again. "This kind of fear may not seem rational to you, but it's something we live with every day. I accepted responsibility for protecting the both of you." She looked at Hermione.

"I cared for you as my own daughter and I wanted for you what your parents wanted--that you wouldn't make the mistakes we made at your age. This is not about whether I still like you. This is not about me wanting Harry to choose one of us to have in his life. I am just so disappointed in both of you," she said. "I needed to be able to trust you because that's all we have as your parents. It's the only thing that allows us to let you go, even a little bit. The knowledge that you're safe from things you're not ready for."

Lily held up a hand as Harry opened his mouth to speak. "You can spare me the speech about how you know what you're doing. I've been there and I know the mistakes I wanted to take back, long after I'd made them. I wanted you to wait because I didn't want any of your firsts to ever be something you'd regret. Life is filled with enough of those that I thought you could spare yourself one."

"Mum, I feel bad that we hurt you, but I'm never going to regret what we've done," Harry said after a brief silence. He reached out to his mother and placed a hand on her shoulder. "I know you don't want to hear it, but we talked about it a lot before anything happened. It wasn't something that we rushed into because..." He glanced at Hermione. She was looking away from both of them, staring at a blank space on the wall. "It wasn't something that came about because of the situation we're in now. Whatever happens from here, I don't want you to hate Hermione because of what we've done."

"Is that what you think?" Lily asked. She studied her son's expression for several long moments before following his gaze to Hermione. "I don't hate you."

Hermione turned back to them and Harry saw that she was crying.

"I would never hate you, Hermione."

"But, you said--"

"I said some hurtful things to you and I'm sorry," Lily said. "I know it's no excuse, but I have some trust issues that I did not have before. You may not understand this, but after everything that's changed, I wanted one thing about Harry to stay the same. I've always been the most important person in his life. You threatened to change that."

"I'm not a threat to your relationship with him," Hermione said. She took a step closer. "You know that. He loves both of us and I would never ask him to choose between us."

"Nor would I," Lily said quickly. She smiled as Harry slipped his hand into hers. "It sounds silly, but I also wanted you to keep one part of you the little boy I raised because the rest of your life was becoming unrecognizable. It started over a year ago, but the past few months..." She squeezed his hand. "I know you're not the same, but you can't blame me for wanting to hold onto to even that small part, can you?"

"No, I can't," Harry said. He smiled as his mother ruffled his hair. "I'm sorry we hurt you."

"I'm sorry too," Hermione added quickly.

"But I want you to understand that we love each other and what we have is real. It's real to us. It may not be the kind of love you want me to have right now, but I think it's what I need," Harry said. "Hermione was right. I need all the support I can get, however I can get it."

"Fine," Lily said. She put her arm around her son and squeezed his shoulder. She swallowed hard. "I think we each understand how the other feels and I don't want to talk about it anymore. Just promise me one thing."

"Yes, we'll be careful," Harry said. "That's the only thing in my life that seems safe right now."

Lily continued to hold her son, but said nothing. When Hermione caught her gaze, she frowned briefly. This particular battle over her son might be over, but the war for his life had yet to be won.

Early one morning several days later, nerves tightened her stomach as she woke in the dark. The house was silent, but she recognized the familiar feeling before her own dreams had faded. Hermione felt Harry stir again and frowned into the darkness. By the time he opened his eyes, she had the lamp next to the bed lit and was sitting up, waiting to soothe him from his most recent nightmare.

"I know where they are," Harry said. He closed his eyes and concentrated on the words that had just flashed through his thoughts. "Whatever Voldemort did to Neville, I can sense his thoughts and emotions now too, as if I'm right there in the room."

"Was it like before?" Hermione asked. "When you saw Nagini attack Mr. Weasley?"

"No," Harry replied. "This is...I can't explain it. But I know where they are," he said again. He pushed the sheets back on the bed and began reaching for his clothes. "I have to tell Dumbledore. I think we can rescue Neville today."