Death Before Dishonor

Death Before Dishonor

Chapter Eleven: Laughter as the Best Medicine

Faint words escaped as Minerva McGonagall slid the staff room door open. She´d hoped for a little peace and quiet before her weekly chess game with the Headmaster--the one thing she could always be sure of beating him at--but it seemed she would not get her wish.

"I can´t believe you did that, Sirius," Remus Lupin was saying as she entered. "I know you always joked around about how dogs always chase cats, but I never thought you´d actually go through with it!"

"You should have known better," Black replied smugly.

Minerva shut the door, and both professors´ heads snapped up at the sound. Guilt and amusement warred for control of each face, but both seemed finally to settle on a mild form of embarrassment. Sirius, she noticed, looked around the room quickly as if calculating avenues of escape, but Minerva was blocking the only door. Finally, he turned his big blue eyes on her with what his friends had always called the puppy-dog look--That description turned out to be much more accurate than I ever dreamed, she thought. Minerva let him stew for a moment before speaking sternly.

"Don´t give me that sad look, Mr. Black! You ought to be ashamed of yourself, carrying on like that in front of the entire school. What on earth were you thinking?" she demanded.

"Well, I´ll admit that I wasn´t," Sirius responded.

"Well, of course you weren´t!" Minerva snapped. "You´re a professor now, for Merlin´s sake! You ought to learn to act like one, at least, even if you are still an overgrown adolescent prankster at heart!"

Sirius shrugged without even a hint of regret. "It seemed like a fun idea at the time."

McGonagall stared at him. She hadn´t seen Sirius since before James and Lily had died, but he hadn´t changed a bit! He was still acting without even pausing to consider the consequences, and was still jumping headfirst into the duck pond without bothering to check the depth first. He hadn´t grown up at all. And yelling at him certainly wasn´t going to change that. After all, it had certainly never worked before. Sighing, she dropped into the armchair that faced the couch Lupin and Black were sprawled on. "You´re never going to grow up," she muttered in defeat. "Whatever am I going to do with you?"

"You might try laughing, Minerva," came a voice from another armchair. This one faced the fireplace, and had a high back that blocked all view of its occupant, but she knew that voice anywhere.

"Albus!" she snapped. "You heard what he did!"

Dumbledore rose and came around the chair to face her, his eyes twinkling merrily. "I did. And I happen to find it very amusing," he replied. Smiling, he strolled across the room and took a seat in the chair next to her. Minerva shot him a cross glance as he spoke, but the Headmaster continued before she could speak. "What I am curious about, though, is what drove him to do it." He turned. "Sirius?"

Under her breath, the Transfiguration professor mumbled darkly, "Because he thought he could get away with it, that´s why."

Sirius laughed. "Well, the fact that you couldn´t give me a detention did occur to me," he admitted. "And maybe it did it to prove I still could." At this, Lupin shot a quick look of concern in his friend´s direction that Minerva did not understand, but Sirius continued.

"Mostly, though, I did it because of the atmosphere here at Hogwarts." Suddenly, his voice was serious. "Over the last four days, we´ve done an admirable job of convincing these kids that the world has changed. They´re starting to understand what we´re preparing them for, and that´s good because they need to be ready.

"But because they understand that, they´ve gotten very serious about studying--too serious. They´re forgetting to have fun, and we are forgetting some of the important parts of a Hogwarts education: friendship and growing up. Laughter is good medicine. They needed a break."

Minerva stared, but was not so shocked that she missed Dumbledore´s pleased nod. Lupin, too, smiled fondly at his friend. "Well, that certainly wasn´t what I expected," she said honestly. "It seems I´ll have to take back what I said, Sirius. You did grow up. Time finally managed to change you."

"Twelve years in Azkaban will do that," he replied grimly, his eyes darkening and gaining a haunted quality that she hadn´t seen before.

"I´m so sorry," Minerva said quickly. She felt terrible. Of course twelve years in that awful place would change a man, even if he was innocent. Pain flickered briefly in the younger man´s eyes. She started, "I didn´t mean to remind you--"

With a wave of his hand, Sirius brushed her apology aside. "It´s all right," he replied. "I don´t have nearly as many nightmares now."

Next to him, Remus was wearing the same look of concern that he had minutes before, which made plenty of sense now. Sirius had stayed with him before the start of the term, an if anyone would know about his memories or the way his experiences still hurt him, it was Remus. Now, though, Sirius was nodding to his friend reassuringly. His unspoken words were clear enough for even Minerva to understand--I´m all right, his nod said, and he lost some of the haunted look as he smiled.

"Besides," he said lightly. "Although most of the students are willing to trust me, it doesn´t hurt to reaffirm that image in their eyes. After all, I doubt many cold-blooded murderers are going to go running around the castle as a dog, chased by Hogwarts´ incredibly threatening Transfiguration professor and fleeing from her wrath!"

They all laughed. It was a hard thing to imagine.

"That´s fine for you to say!" she replied with an answering grin. "You weren´t´ the cat who was bowled over by a huge and hungry-looking dog! I´ve never been so traumatized in my life!"

This time, it took even longer for the four professors to control their mirth. Any student looking in on the scene (which, fortunately, none could do) would have thought them all mad. Dumbledore had half-fallen out of his chair before he caught himself, Lupin was gasping for air, Black was trying to growl unconvincingly between bouts of hilarity, and McGonagall herself was almost faint from laughing so hard. Finally, Remus managed to speak.

"Oh, I don´t know," he said to Minerva. "It might do wonders for your reputation!"

"I doubt that," she chuckled. "All the students are still going on about the `guts´ that it takes to do that to your own former professor, and the girls have gone positively goo-goo eyed over how handsome you looked, Sirius. After you returned to human form, I assume."

Black looked positively horrified, but Lupin looked delighted. Before he could rib his friend, though, Minerva continued wickedly. "And those same females, Remus, are going on about how heroic you looked when I cornered you!" she declared. "Between the two of you, you´ve given the entire female population of Hogwarts enough day dreams to last until they´re my age!"

She thought Albus was going to choke on the sugar quill he´d just started eating.

Remus looked terrified. "Oh, no..."

"What have I done?" Sirius whispered, dropping his face into his hands. For a moment, Minerva was afraid that he was actually going to be sick.

She let them stew for a moment more, and returned Dumbledore´s grin with a sly smile. Neither of the younger professors noticed; both were too preoccupied. Every word was true, of course--walking through the corridors all afternoon, she´d heard was talk of Sirius´ prank. He´d certainly gotten everyone´s attention, she figured, so he deserved whatever came of that.

"Speaking of things you´ve done," she continued briskly. "What made you throw those two Smelly-Smoke bombs, anyway? I wasn´t really going to hurt Remus, you know, and now I´ll never get the stink out of those robes!"

Sirius gave her a look that Minerva guessed was supposed to be chivalrous. He threw an arm around Remus´ shoulders, then grinned. "I couldn´t leave a friend in need."

"Is that was you call friendship?" she snickered. "Well, then I suppose you two deserve one another. You´ve certainly won the students over in record time, Sirius." Minerva smiled sweetly.

"If you keep at it, you´ll be the next Gilderoy Lockhart!"

One week later, the laughter had died down, but Sirius had quickly become one of everyone´s favorite teachers. The Slytherins, of course, complained incessantly, but even they had a hard time finding something to make a case over. Malfoy initially tried to write Professor Black off as unprofessional and immature, but as soon as lessons got into full swing, that proved impossible. Defense Against the Dark Arts became as engrossing as it had been in Professor Lupin´s year, and even if it was less fun at times, it was always practical. The students found out very quickly that Sirius Black pulled no punches; he told them exactly how things worked and the truth of what happened without ever telling a class that they "weren´t old enough for that". His frank lessons led to a few uncomfortable moments; students with more squeamish natures sometimes wished that they hadn´t been told the truth, but no one had ever tried to tell them the world was fair. Sirius Black was a good example of that.

The strangest part about their lessons, as Harry found it, was that fifth, sixth, and seventh year students were getting the exact same classes in Defense Against the Dark Arts. When Hermione had asked why, Sirius had looked her in the eye and asked if she thought a Death Eater would stop to ask her age before attacking. Hermione had been a bit embarrassed by that, but the point had been made. The world was at war, and anyone could become a target. It was only a matter of time.

"Hurry up, Ron!" Hermione hissed as they rushed down the hall, a hairsbreadth away from being late for their favorite class.

"I´m coming, already," Ron grumbled. "Calm down. It´s not like Professor Black is going to give us detentions or anything."

"You don´t know that," she snapped. "Just because he hasn´t done it yet doesn´t mean he won´t, and I don´t want to find out."

Harry rolled his eyes and held the door open for his friends. As they hurried inside the classroom, he was grateful to notice that Sirius wasn´t there yet; the students at Hogwarts had found that as the term went on, their newest professor was less and less likely to be early for class. Sirius was never quite late, but Harry suspected that he liked to cut it close. The thought of his godfather made him smile, but the expression froze on his face as he noticed the gaggle of students sitting on the right side of the classroom. His fellow Gryffindor fifth years were on the left side, separated from the others by a row of desks and glaring suspiciously at the newcomers.

"What are you doing here, Malfoy?" Harry demanded as the blond boy glared back at him.

"I´m here for class, Potter," Draco Malfoy sneered. "In case that´s too obvious for you."

Hermione stepped forward. "What isn´t obvious is what you´re doing here. This is our class time, not yours."

"Like we´d want to spend time with a bunch of Gryffindors." Malfoy spat their house name out as if it was poisonous, nodding toward his fellow fifth year Slytherins. "We don´t have any more choice than you do. They changed our class time."

"What for?" Hermione wondered.

"Like I´d know, Mudblood." Malfoy rolled his eyes. "I´m not the teacher´s pet."

Harry´s eyebrows shot up as Malfoy casually threw the insult at his friend. Malfoy and his friends had gotten more obnoxious this term, but since Harry had been avoiding him with unusual skill all year long (aside from Potions, of course, but with McGonagall teaching, Malfoy hadn´t been able to get away with anything at all), he hadn´t had an opportunity to see how much worse Malfoy had gotten. Furious, Harry opened his mouth to reply, but Ron beat him to it.

"How dare you?" Ron snarled, turning bright red in anger. "You think you´re all important because you´re purebred and rich. Well, I´ll tell you that everyone else just thinks of you as inbred and revolting."

Hermione had also turned red, but now her eyes widened in astonishment as she forgot her own anger and embarrassment. Harry, too, stared at his friend, feeling a great surge of pride in Ron. Ron had never hesitated to stand up to Malfoy before, but his usual first line of defense had been his fists, whereas now Ron was taking a different tactic--one that definitely annoyed Malfoy.

The Slytherin shot to his feet. He snarled, "You just wish your family was like mine."

"Not for all the money in the world!" Ron retorted.

It might have gone further had Sirius not swept into the room at that moment, and neither Ron nor Malfoy was stupid enough to fight in front of a teacher. All four of them sat down, and Harry quickly pulled out his notes. Defense Against the Dark Arts was his favorite class, and he wasn´t going to let Malfoy ruin that. However, he did take a moment to exchange a sly grin with Ron; it wasn´t every day that someone managed to insult Malfoy´s family. Usually, it was the other way around, and Harry was glad that Ron had gotten back at the stuck-up Slytherin.

After taking attendance, Sirius got straight to the point that had been bugging them all. "As I´m sure all of you have noticed," he began dryly, "your class has suddenly doubled in size. While I apologize for any difficulties this may cause, I´m afraid that the change will be permanent, due the need to clear space in my schedule for a project Professor Lupin and I are working on. However, I assure you that the class will continue as before."

Sirius paused for a moment, but certainly did not give the Slytherins any time to object before he continued.

"So far this term we have gone over basic defensive methods that work against a variety of dark creatures. However, not all of your foes are going to fall into that category. Some of them are going to be human."

A chill ran down Harry´s spine.

"I won´t lie to you," Sirius said softly. "Nor will ever I fail to tell you the truth about how bad things are just because you are young. The attacks are growing more frequent. People are dying. Many of you undoubtedly have family and friends who are in danger right now. Despite that, you are safe at Hogwarts. If you choose to do so, you can pretend that the attacks don´t affect you at all. And maybe they don´t. Maybe they never will.

"Today we´re going to start a new lesson: Defense against Death Eaters. I am going to teach you some of the basic tactics that Aurors use, and we´re also going to cover the Unforgivable Curses in more depth than you did last year. Most importantly, I´m going to teach you how to stay alive if you´re ever faced by Death Eaters, which I sincerely hope will never happen. But if it does, you will be prepared."

Harry felt a ripple of anxiety run through the room. Many of them had some kind of experience with Voldemort´s followers: Neville´s parents had been taken out of his life because of Death Eater atrocities, and he, Ron, and Hermione had most recently encountered Voldemort´s disciples at the Burrow that summer. Not to mention the fact that half the Slytherins probably have Death Eaters as parents, Harry thought to himself, forcing the grimace off his face. Perhaps that wasn´t a fair estimation; after all, he only knew that Malfoy, Crabbe, Goyle and Nott had parents on the Dark Side, and four wasn´t quite half of the Slytherin fifth years. Just close.

But even having thought that, he could not believe his ears when Malfoy spoke.

"You make it sound like anyone who practices the Dark Arts is evil," the blonde haired boy said haughtily. "But can you prove that?"

The entire class stared. Harry blinked, staring at his long-time rival, trying to figure out if Malfoy had really dared to ask that question. The arrogant Slytherin constantly challenged teachers that he did not respect (which was any of them except for Snape, of course) but he´d never dared do anything so confrontational. Even Malfoy had never dared openly support Voldemort. Which he isn´t, Harry reminded himself. Quite. But it would have taken a blind man to miss the underlying meaning of Malfoy´s question.

Even Sirius seemed to be taken aback. For a long moment, he simply stared at Malfoy, his face completely closed off and unreadable. Finally, he regarded the question with a serious expression. "Would you like to make a case for how they are not, Mr. Malfoy?"

"As you say all the time Professor, it´s a war," Malfoy responded smoothly; unfortunately, Harry realized, the other boy was treading carefully. "Surely one side will always vilify the other. I was just wondering why we never hear the entire story. Both sides, I mean."

"You mean the Death Eater side," Sirius responded, his voice flat.

Harry didn´t miss the quick glance of triumph that Malfoy shared with his fellow Slytherins, and he doubted that Sirius did either. However, he was surprised that their professor had let Malfoy´s questions continue; although Sirius conducted himself in a very relaxed manner with his students, he never allowed things to get out of hand. He didn´t give out detentions because he didn´t need to. Sirius was just the kind of man who gained respect easily, and the easy power that he exuded meant that none of the students wanted to see what happened when he was crossed. The fact that he hadn´t stopped the Slytherin´s questions clearly gave Malfoy a sense of victory, and he smiled silkily and continued.

"Well, I was just thinking that not everything the Death Eaters do is bad," Malfoy responded. "And that they certainly have reasons to do so. In the end, how are we to know who history will judge as evil? And who are you to tell us which side is right and which is wrong?"

This time, Sirius responded every bit as evenly as he had before, but even though his voice did not change, his demeanor did. There was nothing obvious about the change; it was something more felt than seen, but he suddenly seemed harder and more intense. He suddenly seemed dangerous.

"You can believe what you want to about power and about how the end justifies the means, Mr. Malfoy. I have heard all of those excuses before. But I have seen it. I´ve pulled bodies out of the wreckage, bodies of friends, of family, and of innocents. I´ve seen the dead adults and the dead children, most of who would never understand why they died. Perhaps you do not care about them. Some people don´t.

"To answer your question, no one can decide which side to take but you. However, the lines between right and wrong are not something you can blur through wishful thinking or self-importance."

Malfoy jumped to his feet, red with anger. "How dare you!"

"Sit down, Mr. Malfoy." Sirius did not raise his voice.

"I will not! You can´t just--"

"I can say what ever I please, young man, especially when it is the truth," Sirius continued in that same hard voice. "Perhaps you will prove me wrong in the future. If that day should come, I will apologize, but until then, I advise you not to ask questions to which you do not want to know the answers. Sit down."

From that moment forward, the term began to fly by. The story of Sirius having shot down Malfoy flew around the castle faster than the newest model of broomstick, the soon to be released Phoenix Racer. Malfoy´s first reaction was to try to bluff his way out of the embarrassment and blame the situation all on Professor Black, but that was made difficult by the Ministry´s announcement of Sirius´ innocence. Harry didn´t quite understand why the Ministry of Magic had delayed releasing it for so long, but he accepted Sirius´ vague reply about the cause being only politics. He was slightly surprised that the Ministry still denied the fact that Voldemort had returned, despite the fact that, as Sirius had said in class, the Death Eaters were becoming more and more active. Also, since the Ministry could no longer blame the attacks on Sirius, the Daily Prophet had become maddeningly speculative, and Harry found himself laughing at some of the absurd theories the paper published. In retrospect, he supposed that Cornelius Fudge had been representative of the magical world--he would rather believe anything, no matter how far-fetched, than accept the fact that Voldemort was alive.

At the moment, though, such global events were far from his mind. He was concerned with something much closer to home.

"Can you believe that?" Hermione demanded angrily, for once feeling as overloaded as everyone else by homework. "Four feet of parchment from Professor Snape, and we still have to reach that other potion before the next class!"

"I think he hates us," Ron lamented.

"I know he hates us," Hermione snapped.

"You´d think he would be in a better mood after finally getting out of the Hospital Wing," Ron groused, "but no! Instead he´s every bit as nasty as ever, if not worse."

Harry shrugged. True, Professor Snape was worse than usual and potions class had been absolutely miserable, but some things just didn´t change. Part of him wondered if it would even seem like Hogwarts if Snape hadn´t been his usual, ill-tempered self. Besides, dealing with the Potions Master was a lot easier now since he knew that Snape didn´t want to kill him. He only hated him, and Harry could handle that.

"At least he was equally nasty with the Slytherins," he pointed out. "If what Malfoy was grumbling about is right, anyway."

"Malfoy is always complaining." Ron rolled his eyes.

"But not about Snape," Hermione said. "Harry´s right. He´s not putting up with anything funny from them, either, and that´s different. He always favors them, but did you see him in the hallway this morning, when Goyle ran into him? Malfoy tried to blame it on Ginny, but Snape nearly gave both Malfoy and Goyle detentions--I think only Professor Lupin walking up stopped him, and he didn´t even look at Ginny."

"That is weird," Ron agreed.

"A lot of things are changing around here," Harry said quietly as they headed up the stairs toward the Gryffindor common room "Did you notice that they´re strengthening the wards around the castle? I heard Sirius and Snape talking about it earlier."

"They were actually talking to each other? she asked.

"Not very happily, I bet," Ron added. "Snape looks at Sirius like he wants to kill him."

Despite the fact that Sirius saved his life, Harry thought to himself, but didn´t say it. After all, Sirius did not seem to mind Snape´s feelings a bit; he´d smiled and said to Harry that he would have felt like a failure if Snape didn´t hate him. But they did seem to be working together all right, and Harry had to wonder just what Professor Dumbledore had threatened them with to keep it that way. He only shrugged in reply as they reached the entrance to the common room.

"Shuntbumps," he said, and the three of them slipped through the portrait hole. However, before the entrance could swing shut behind the trio, another pair of students came bowling into them.

"Hey!" Harry yelped, trying to twist out of the way when a body hit him from behind. Unfortunately, his movement carried him straight into Hermione, who tripped over Crookshanks (somehow, that cat always managed to complicate matters) and fell to the floor. Her legs promptly proceeded to become tangled in Harry´s, toppling him as well. He landed on top of her left arm, but over Hermione´s surprised exclamation, he still heard Ron snap:

"Watch where you´re going, will you--AH!"

The second student ran into Ron as he rushed through the hole before the entrance could shut. Neither Ron nor his attacker fell; however, both stumbled and nearly lost their balance. Suddenly, though, Harry´s view of the scene was blocked as hands reached out and hauled him and Hermione to his feet.

"Sorry, Ron, Harry, Hermione," Fred Weasley said immediately. "We didn´t mean to run into you."

"Then why did you?" Hermione asked, staring at their flushed faces. "It´s not like you don´t know the password. Why couldn´t you just wait?"

"Because we found it," George replied as if that explained everything.

"And we don´t want him to know we got it." Fred grinned.

"If he even knows what it is."

"It´s too precious to remain in the wrong hands, after all--"

"Extremely valuable."

"Some people just can´t be trusted with it, that´s all--"

"And we felt it our duty to rescue it," George finished. "In honor of the greatest students Hogwarts has ever had."

"What are you talking about?" Ron demanded, just as Hermione gasped.

"You didn´t!"

"Didn´t what?" Fred asked innocently.

"You stole the Marauder´s Map again, didn´t you?" she asked reproachfully.

The twins grinned, but Harry frowned. "But Professor Moody--or Crouch, anyway--took it from me last semester," he said. "How did you get it?"

"Oh, easy," Fred replied promptly. "In fact, we got the map the same way we got it from Filch years ago. One of us managed to get inside Professor Black´s office--"

"That was me," George replied happily.

Fred nodded graciously to his twin before continuing. "While the other set off a distraction--a very beautiful one, I might add, consisting of a Dungbomb and a suit of armor that we enchanted to dance--and simply grabbed the map. It was right in the top of one of the drawers. I don´t even think Professor Black knew it existed."

The trio exchanged looks. Immediately, a grin blossomed on Ron´s face, and Harry knew what his friend was thinking even as Hermione opened her mouth to correct Fred.

"Ow!" she snapped instead of speaking. Ron had kicked her, hard, in the ankle. Hermione glared at him, but Ron only smiled.

"No," he said with a huge smile. "I don´t reckon he knows anything about it."

Hermione looked at him strangely, but Harry managed to catch her eye and nod. Their years of friendship got the message across: for once, the joke was on Fred and George--neither of them knew that Sirius was Padfoot, so why tell them? There was no use in ruining the inevitably hilarious moment that would come when Sirius discovered the missing map and brought his brand of prankstering to play on the Weasley twins. It would be much more fun to play along for the time being.

Hermione sighed, but remained otherwise silent. Fred and George, of course, were oblivious, too pleased with themselves to notice the byplay between the younger three Gryffindors. They were standing side by side, now, staring at the map fondly, and for a moment, Harry wondered if they might not kiss the parchment. It was hard not to jump up and down in anticipation, but Harry schooled himself into stillness as George sighed in delight.

"It is good to have you back," he said to the map.

"We missed you," Fred agreed.

"Well, with no further ado," George continued, "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good."

"Never truer--what?" Fred jumped and stared at the map. Curious, the other three gathered around, and also gazed at the map in amazement. When George had touched his wand to the parchment, no lines appeared. Instead, only words emerged. While they were the same large and curly style that all the Gryffindor mischief-makers had seen before, the words came out in red, rather than green, and were far different from what any of them had expected.

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Author´s Note: Thanks again for all the reviews! I´ll keep begging for more, because you have no idea (or, okay, maybe some of you do) how much reviews motivate an author to write more. I certainly wouldn´t still be writing this if you weren´t all being so wonderful about writing reviews, that´s for sure. Anyway, stick with me; I´ll get serious again soon (no pun intended--or maybe there was...). Stay tuned for details on how the war is effecting Hogwarts--and "what happens when you don´t pay attention". If I say more, it´ll give the plot away. Oh, but I can say that Voldemort is about to start playing dirty... Please review!!