A Hundred Reasons

A Hundred Reasons

James risked a furtive glance over at Lily, who was hidden behind a curtain of dark red hair as she leant over her table, scribbling madly. Leaning back with a deliberate casualness, he scanned the common room. It was late, and nearly everyone had gone up to their dorms. A few of the younger students sat in large arm chairs on the other side of the fire. At a smaller table, Remus and Sirius sat working on a card castle with a deck ordinarily used for exploding snap as Peter looked on, eagerly. One would never guess, he mused, that they were sixteen. However, he couldn't be bothered to make one of his usual sarcastic comments about his friends' maturity level. James had more important things to worry about.

And he had certainly been worrying about her for a while now. Still, James knew it was only a matter of time. After all, what girl could resist the famous Potter charm forever? He was certain she was nearing the breaking point. Sirius teased him endlessly for bothering, but James was determined.

James glanced over once again to make sure Sirius was too engrossed in his rigged-to-explode structure to notice what he was doing, then quickly got up and crossed the room to stand behind Lily's chair.

"So, Evans, what are you up to?" James inquired, trying not to sound overly eager, but at the same time flashing her one of the dazzling smiles that had made so many Hogwarts girls swoon over him in the past.

The smile was wasted, as she didn't even glance up. "Homework. I don't suppose you've heard of it, Potter."

James ignored her jibe; he was certainly used to them by now. The girl really did need to lighten up. He slid around to the seat opposite her and squinted down, trying to see through the sheet of red that hid her face from view. "Well, since you're getting it all out of the way now, how'd you like to go out with me on Saturday night?"

Lily sighed aloud, then put down her quill and tucked her hair behind her ears, meeting his eyes with her own vivid emerald ones. "My God, Potter, do you never give up?" she exclaimed in disbelief.

He put his head in a hand and asked nonchalantly, "Is that a yes or a no?"

She rolled her eyes, picking her quill up again. "That would be a no," she replied with exaggerated clarity, then leaned back down to continue her work. Not to be discouraged, James lunged in and snatched her quill out of her hand, then leaned back in his chair when she tried to lunge for it. Knowing she wouldn't be able to retrieve it easily, she simply glared at him venomously as he toyed with it absently, not breaking eye contact. "Come on, Evans! Why won't you go out with me?"

"Do you want it alphabetically or chronologically?" she replied scathingly. "I could give you a hundred reasons."

"Oh yeah?" He challenged. "List three."

Lily's eyes were fiery now as she lifted a hand to tick the points off. "One; you're unbearably arrogant."

"Oi, that's not true!"

"Don't be ridiculous! You're convinced that just because you can play Quidditch, you rule the world. You expect that every girl is going to fall drooling at your feet, myself included. You sit there in all your godly glory, messing up your hair because you think it's cool, and considering yourself to be above all of the little people fawning of you. You are pathetic." James found the disgust, bordering on both hatred and pity, almost overwhelming.

"That's a lie, I don't think I'm above every-"

She cut him off efficiently, continuing with her list. "Two; you're a bullying prat."

"Hey, I hardly ever do that anymore-"

"Does the name Snivellus ring any bells in that over-sized head of yours?"

"You can't blame me for dealing with him. He's a slimy little git who would attack me if I didn't get to him first."

"But you couldn't be the bigger man and step down, risking your reputation, could you now?" she responded patronizingly. "Three; I have no desire to become one in a long list of girls you used and then left in dust. Would you like me to continue? I could go on for days, you know."

"That's not true." James was standing now, glaring back down at her. "You don't know that I'd do that to you. For all you know, I could be in love with you."

"Oh please, do you really think me that naïve?" Lily laughed scornfully. "I doubt you even know the meaning of the word!"

James sat back down on his chair with a soft thud, and a slightly far away look in his eyes. "Love is everything, Lily. It's being willing to die for someone. More importantly, it's being willing to live for someone, even when you would rather take the easy way out. It's giving your whole soul, your whole self to another, and never once worrying that they would betray you, because you trust the implicitly. And it's receiving theirs in exchange, and guarding it a thousand times more closely that your own life. Love is what keeps people from just giving up, surrounded by violence and hatred. It isn't questioned, it just is, and the search for it is what gives millions of people hope." James turned to meet her eyes again, a different sort of light in them now. "I could well love you, Lily Evans, and that is why I'm not going to give up. It could take years, it could take decades, but I will never, ever give up. You can give me a hundred reasons why I'm awful, but I've just given you one that will someday cancel those, and a million other reasons out. You might as well get used to the idea, Lily, because we're fate, and you can only avoid fate for so long."

Lily stood, looking down at him with a slight smile playing at the corners of her lips. "You know, James, you might be an arrogant jerk, but sometimes you can be pretty sweet." Standing on tip-toes, she leaned over the table and gave him a quick, fleeting kiss.

James sat there in total shock; he was waiting for rigor mortis to set in, as he no doubt had to be dead for that to have just happened. He continued to stare, practically unblinking, as she snatched her quill out of his hand, slammed her book shut, and started off towards her common room. James finally grasped at the presence of mind to shout after her, gleefully, "Does that mean you'll go out with me?"

"Of course not! You're still an arrogant git," she called without looking back. Still, James' ecstasy remained unbroken, even by the sudden bang and loud swearing as Sirius and Remus' card tower exploded, nearly singing off Sirius' eyebrows in the process.