The Wounded

The Wounded

Chapter 9

Lupin quickly put an arm around the snarling dog. "Easy, easy, it's all right," he said, but it kept growling and flashing enormous yellow fangs, all the while cringing against him. Lupin looked up at Harry's astonished face, and sighed.

"Accio Wand," Lupin said, calmly, and his wand flew to his fingers from where it lay on a nearby table. He waved it once over the dog and said, "Dormio." The dog froze in mid-snarl, a look of surprise on its face. Then it slowly relaxed, legs sliding out from under it, until its body rested on the sofa, and its head fell into Lupin's lap. Its eyes closed, and it lay quite still, with only the slow rising and falling of its side.

"It's all right now, Harry," Lupin said. "You can come on over if you like."

Harry still stared, wide-eyed, then he collected himself and nodded. His head, suspended in the fireplace, moved forward a little, and his body materialized around it. He stood up and walked into the room.

"What was that about?" he asked, as he moved hesitantly over to the sofa where Lupin sat with the dog. "He acted like he hated me." He pulled one of the fireplace chairs over and sat down.

Lupin said, carefully, "This dog has been badly treated, all of his life." He stopped and thought, how to put it? "He expects to be hurt by people, because that's all he's ever known. So he snarls first."

"That's not going to make people like him any better," Harry said.

"No, it's not. But it's a very common behavior."

Harry looked at the dog. "My cousin Dudley used to kick any dog he came across, or throw things at them. All the neighborhood dogs would run when they saw him coming." He grimaced. "He'd have really gone after a dog like this one, just because of how freaky he looks."

Lupin nodded. "He's a special breed, a Spectral Hound, a guard dog for Dark Wizards."

Harry frowned, suspiciously. "So he's evil, a creature of the Dark?"

"No, he's just a dog, no matter what he looks like. His heart is sound, he's brave, loyal, he's even saved people's lives. He just doesn't know how to be with people." It's not really a lie. Substitute "man" for "dog" and it's pretty much the truth.

Harry looked at the dog again. "So you're going to teach him better manners?"

Lupin nodded. "And to trust people. To help him learn that people can be kind. And that he's worth kindness. He's been treated so badly for so long, he doesn't think he's worth anything."

Harry's eyes were still on the dog. "People can be really awful."

"Yes, they can. Even otherwise good people." Lupin closed his eyes. We certainly thought we were good people, after all. He stroked the dog's head. Then he looked up at Harry. "You could be a big help, you know. With him."

Harry raised an eyebrow. "I can't get near him."

"Not now. But maybe we can teach him to trust you." Lupin nodded at the dog. "Now, while he's asleep, if you pet him and talk to him, let him get used to your voice and your scent subconsciously, that could be a start."

Harry looked thoughtful. Then he slid off the chair onto the floor and knelt by the sofa. Hesitantly, he raised his hand, and brought it towards the dog's head, then he began to rub the silky ears. The dog froze for a moment as Harry's hand touched him, but then he relaxed.

Harry grinned up at Lupin, and then he leaned closer, and spoke softly, "Good dog, you're a good dog." He moved his hand along the big neck, down the dog's sides, then back up again. The dog gave a whimper, deep in his throat, then he breathed easily, lying heavily against Lupin.

"What's his name?" Harry asked, still running his hand over the dog's skin.

"I, uh, haven't really given him one yet," Lupin said.

"I think we should call him 'Sirius,'" Harry said.

The dog started, and Lupin said, quickly, "No, that's a name with too much meaning, for you and I both. And not 'Padfoot' or 'Snuffles', either. He needs his own name."

Harry frowned, and was quiet, although he still kept stroking the dog, fingers digging deep into the fur of its neck. Lupin wondered, Thinking of Sirius? Or your fight with Hermione yesterday?

"Did you have something you wanted to talk about?" Lupin said. "When you called me through the floo?"

Harry kept stroking the dog. "Hermione and me, we had a fight yesterday."

"That's too bad," Lupin said. "What about?"

Harry opened his mouth, then shut it, firmly, and his eyes looked hard. "You'd just take her side."

"I'm on both your sides," Lupin said. "I might disagree with you, but I'm always on your side."

Harry was quiet, face still hard. Then he turned to Lupin, defiantly. "Snape caused Sirius's death. I hate him for being alive, when Sirius is dead."

Lupin cocked his head and looked back, mildly. "Lots of people are still alive. I'm still alive, do you hate me, too?"

"No. But you didn't kill Sirius."

"As I recall," Lupin said, "it was Bellatrix who killed Sirius."

"Sirius wouldn't have been there if we hadn't been at the Ministry."

"No. And I believe Severus tried to stop you from going. Except you'd already gone before he could find you. He'd talked to Sirius, and found out he was all right."

"He stopped the Occlumency lessons!" Harry said suddenly, eyes flashing. "If I'd been able to block Voldemort from my mind, none of this would have happened."

"So you did go back and talk to Severus? You asked to continue the lessons, and he denied you?"

Harry looked darkly at Lupin. "So you're like Hermione, you think it was my fault."

"No, of course not, and I don't believe she does, either. Frankly, I don't think the Occlumency lessons would have made much difference. It takes years to master it to the level you'd need to block out Voldemort. I think Dumbledore was hoping more that you and Severus would talk. That you'd see how much you have in common."

Harry gave him a look of pure disgust.

In for a penny, in for a pound, Lupin thought, and he said, "I think you need someone else to blame, because in your heart, you do blame yourself. Harry, it wasn't your fault. It wasn't anyone's fault."

Harry stood up. "I have to go. I'm meeting Ron." He turned and walked fiercely to the door.

"Harry," Lupin called after him, "Harry, I blame Voldemort for Sirius's death. Place the blame where it belongs."

Harry went through the hall door without answering, closing it hard behind him.

-

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-

Sev-the-Dog woke up from Lupin's sleep spell soon after Harry left, but spent most of the morning lazing in Lupin's lap. Lupin did get him to practice walking around the room, but he was still awkward. He's still weak, thought Lupin. It's hard for his legs to support his weight.

Dobby arrived with lunch, which was a repeat of breakfast - Lupin spoon-fed a number of bites to the dog before he agreed to eat on his own. Afterwards, they were back on the sofa, Lupin reading, Sev-the-Dog lying curled up against him.

It was early evening, when there was a knock on the hall door. Lupin sat up a little, expecting Harry's voice. But he was surprised and delighted to hear Dumbledore's voice say, "Remus, may I come in?"

"Yes," Lupin said. "Yes, of course. Come in." Beside him, Sev-the-Dog sat up, alert, but not frightened.

Lupin's door opened, and Dumbledore stepped quietly into the room. He smiled at Lupin and the dog. "I wished to see how the two of you were getting on."

Sev-the-Dog's eyes were bright, and his ears pricked up. He slid awkwardly off the sofa, and walked with careful, hesitant steps toward Dumbledore until he stood before him, bony head tilted back to look up at him. And was that a hesitant wag of the tail?

Dumbledore looked down at the dog with sad eyes. He lifted a hand and held it out. The dog reached out to touch it with his nose, then ducked his head down, letting Dumbledore's hand slide along his head to ruffle his ears. The dog's eyes closed, and he pressed against Dumbledore's hand.

Dumbledore came over, and sat down in the chair Harry had been sitting in that morning. The dog walked beside him, and sat down next to the chair. Dumbledore's hand rested on the dog's head.

"We are walking a little," Lupin said, "and eating, fairly well." He glanced at Sev-the-Dog. "Harry came by this morning. The reaction was not good; I had to sleep spell him."

Dumbledore nodded. "Not unexpected, though."

"Harry wants to help with him, though, and I'm going to encourage that. It could be a good thing for Harry, too."

Dumbledore looked grave. "About Harry. And you, as well." He looked into Lupin's face. "There have been rumors that Bellatrix has been seen near Hogwarts."

"But she can't get in. Voldemort himself could not get in."

"But she is determined, I think, to revenge herself on Harry. For destroying her world. She has nothing else left."

"I think Harry may feel the same way about her. For killing Sirius," Lupin said. "Are you going to tell him?"

"I'm afraid I shall have to. I've learned the danger of not telling Harry."

"He's in a bad mood, right now," Lupin said. "I don't know how he'll react. He may try to go after her."

"I have spoken with him about this before, and he agreed that it would not be wise to go after Bellatrix alone."

"He may not think that way now."

"Yes, I was there when he argued with Miss Granger. And I am aware that Mr. Weasley will not be able to spend as much time with him after this week. I hope Harry will choose to spend more time with you, Remus, for the rest of the summer. And that you can look after him."

"I will try," Lupin said. Then he nodded at the dog, "But it depends on how long it takes him to accept Harry. Or at least to behave around him."

Dumbledore looked down at the dog, and gave him a few pats. "I think he will snarl, but I do not think he will go as far as a physical attack. That has, at least, been his behavior in the past."

"With Harry, I'm not sure. He's terrified of him."

"Harry symbolizes everything Severus wanted, but could never be."

Lupin nodded. "I know. Seeing Harry makes him feel like dirt." He sighed. "Fortunately, Harry seemed quite willing to work with him. Hopefully enough to forget he's angry with me right now." Dumbledore tilted his head in question, and Lupin added, "For pretty much the same reason he's angry with Hermione."

Dumbledore nodded. "Ah, yes. He was angry with me for quite a long time, for the same reason. He may still be."

"He loved Sirius so much, and he never got to spend the time with him that he wanted. And then the future he saw, of the two of them together, was taken from him so suddenly. And he knows how much Severus hated Sirius. And that Severus lived, and Sirius did not."

Dumbledore looked at Lupin sadly.

Lupin went on. "If he'd been able to find someone to take Sirius's place in his heart," Lupin shook his head, "but there isn't anyone. Merlin knows, I'm not, and can't be."

"Harry loves you very much," Dumbledore said.

"Not the way he loved Sirius. Sirius was his hero. I'm just a friend. I am not cool, I am not heroic. I don't ride a flying motorcycle, I don't wear leather. I don't have his style, never did."

"Heroes are not about style, Remus," Dumbledore said, gently. "Or about motorcycles. You have proved yourself a hero, many times over. All your life."

Lupin shrugged. "And how much more a hero is Severus? For all the credit he gets. No, heroes ARE about style, I think, to most people. The rest of us are just uninspiring sods trying to do the right thing. Sometimes we do, more often than not we fail." He shook his head. "Goodness, I'm being maudlin, aren't I? Sorry about that." He smiled.

Dumbledore smiled back. He gave the dog's head a few more pats, then he slowly stood up. "I'm due in the Great Hall for supper, I promised Minerva I'd be there. I'll keep an eye on Harry, if he's there."

Lupin watched as Sev-the-Dog walked with Dumbledore to the door. He'd follow him out into the hallway, if Dumbledore would let him, and stay by his side. Instead, the dog stood quietly as Dumbledore closed the door behind him. He turned and looked at Lupin, with his sharp, black eyes.

"He'll come back, another time," Lupin said.

Sev-the-Dog walked carefully back to the sofa, clambered up, and leaned against Lupin, head against his shoulder. Lupin put his arm around him, and rested his head against the dog's. "That's our problem, my friend," he said, stroking the dog's neck. "We have all the wrong style."

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Lupin and Sev-the-Dog had just finished breakfast the next morning, when there was a knock at the door, and Ron's voice, called, "Professor Lupin, can I come see the dog?"

Lupin glanced over at Sev-the-Dog, who was lying on the sofa. His head had come up, alert and wary, and his muscles were tense.

"He won't hurt you," Lupin said to the dog, softly. "You must behave politely when he comes in."

Sev-the-Dog glanced at him, eyes hard as obsidian.

"He's come to admire you," Lupin said. "He won't come too close to you, he'll keep his distance."

Sev-the-Dog stared at him, then turned to the door.

"Come in, Ron," Lupin called, "but don't move too quickly, and don't come too close."

The door opened very, very slowly, and Ron's head appeared around the edge. "It is a Spectral Hound, just like Harry said," he said, eyes wide. He eased into the room, and closed the door slowly and softly behind him.

"Harry's coming, too, he just stopped in the hall to talk for a minute," Ron said, as he walked carefully forward.

Sev-the-Dog looked as if every single muscle was constricted, and he watched Ron intently, and warily.

"I think that's close enough, Ron," Lupin said, when Ron was half way across the room. "He's very skittish around people right now."

Ron nodded, and he carefully folded his legs and sat on the floor. "I've never seen a Spectral Hound up close like this. Dad says he's been attacked by several, over the years, when he's been on raids. He says they're terrible creatures, really fierce and vicious."

"Well, that's what they've been taught to be, isn't it?" said Lupin.

"Yeah, right," Ron said. "So, you're going to un-teach this one?"

"Something like that."

"Cool," Ron said. "Mind you, he doesn't look like the kind of dog you could put with a nice, regular family, does he?"

Lupin opened his mouth to answer, when there was another knock at the door, and this time, Harry's voice called, "Professor, can I come in?"

Lupin put his arm around Sev-the-Dog, who had already tensed even further, and said softly, "Remember, he won't hurt you, he doesn't want to hurt you." And then he called, "Come in, Harry, slowly."

The door opened. And the moment Harry stepped into the room, the dog was up, crouching on the sofa, growling and snarling, the hackles along his back prickling up. "It's all right, it's all right," Lupin said, hugging him close, but the dog kept on snarling.

Harry froze in front of the door.

"Stay there, Harry," Lupin said. "Sit down on the floor, get lower than he is, maybe we can get him to see you aren't a threat."

Harry slowly sat down on the floor, spreading his black robes out around him so they wouldn't get tangled in his long legs. He hunched down a little, and looked at the floor, carefully not meeting the dog's eyes. Good, Harry, Lupin thought. That's right, look safe and harmless.

The growling slowly died in the dog's throat, and his black lips came down a little, covering his fangs, but he remained crouched, muscles tense, and eyes glaring. Lupin kept his arms around him, saying, "Easy, it's all right."

Ron's mouth was open. "Wow, he really doesn't like you, does he, Harry."

Harry looked at Lupin. "He wasn't like that with Ron, was he? Why does he hate me?"

Lupin shrugged. "You must look a lot like someone who's hurt him." He looked at Ron. "Although he wasn't exactly friendly with Ron, either. I, uh, suspect he doesn't like young people much."

He began to stroke the dog, talking gently to him. "This is a good thing, you're being here. He can get used to you, and you can show him that he doesn't have to be afraid of you. If you don't mind sitting there for a little while."

Both boys nodded, and stayed still on the floor. Lupin talked gently to the dog. After a good ten minutes, the dog relaxed a little, and consented to lie back on the sofa. He still watched both boys intently, with glaring eyes.

Lupin could see the boys were getting antsy after sitting still for so long. "I think that's enough for now," he said, "although if you feel like it, come back later, and we can do this again. He's already a little calmer. It's just going to take time."

Both boys clearly were ready to go - sitting so still for that long at that age, thought Lupin - but they managed to control themselves enough to rise slowly. Ron walked past Harry to the door. Harry didn't move for a moment, he just stared at the dog. Then he looked at Lupin. His eyes were hard, like yesterday. Lupin smiled at him, and said, "Thank you, both of you." Harry nodded, and turned to follow Ron out of the room.

Sev-the-Dog relaxed a little bit more, as the door closed, but not completely, Lupin could still feel tenseness in his muscles. "That wasn't so bad, was it," Lupin said. "They're both good boys. They want to like you, if you let them."

Sev-the-Dog turned to him with his cold, black eyes, looking completely unconvinced. Lupin sighed. "Well, you were a good dog for not growling the whole time," he said. "That's a start."

He rubbed the dog's back. "You know, once I'm sure you can behave, we can go outside. Wouldn't you like that?" Sev-the-Dog cocked his head at that, and the eyes looked softer, interested, and Lupin went on, "But you mustn't snarl at people. There are better ways to keep people away from you than snarling." Sev-the-Dog's eyes got a little harder. More carrot, less stick, Lupin thought, and he said, "Look out the window, at the pretty green lawns, wouldn't you like to run across that? I've got a ball you can play with, wouldn't you like that?" Lupin felt a little wistful - I've been stuck in here for two days now.

Sev-the-Dog narrowed his eyes at Lupin, and he sniffed. Then he yawned - a great show of yellow teeth and lolling tongue - and stretched out on the sofa, curling up against Lupin. Lupin sighed, smiled, pulled open his book with one hand, and began rubbing the dog's head with his other. We'll try again, he thought. This is only the third day, after all.

-

TBC