And The Feeling Of Longing

Chapter 1: And In The Beginning…

The girl shivers and pulls her cloak closer over her shoulders as another gust of wind blows. Rising slowly, she turns and walks back towards the cabin. Looking up to the sky, she watches the swirling grey clouds dance. Tonight the stars are hidden from sight, but the full moon shines clear. She sighs, and opens the door to the cabin.

Closing the door behind her, she drops her winter cloak to the floor and steps onto the creaking wooden floorboards. She can smell his scent in the fabrics of the room, and suddenly she feels comforted. Curling up on the couch, she watches the flames flicker, and listens to the crackle of the sparks. A wolf cries from far away, and she looks up. She begins to remember the times gone past, memories cursed by the cry of the wolf.

"Hermione? Hermione, what's wrong with you?" Harry cried in disbelief. Hermione span round on her heel and put her hands on her hips.

"Are you saying I'm not allowed to be happy? I happen to have got some very good news, thank you very much, and I wish to be happy until I have to do my Potions essay." Harry shrugged, and Hermione grinned.

Resting her head on the armrest, Hermione closes her eyes and remembers. Remembers the letter she memorised every word of and never forgot. Remembers how she could imagine his voice reading the letter in her head.

Dear Hermione,

I need to tell you something, but I'm not sure if you want to hear this. I've been thinking about it for a while, and it's taken me a while to come to the conclusion I've deduced. Sirius has been asking me what's wrong for ages, and I keep telling him it's just the moon again. I think he's stopped believing me.

So now I tell you this - Hermione, I love you. I love you with all my heart, and nothing can change this. I...I haven't ever loved someone like this before, it's all kind of new to me. I just wanted to tell you.

I understand if you want me to try and forget this - I am twenty years older than you, after all...but something just made me need to tell you.

Love from Remus

"How could you ever think I would want you to forget..." Hermione muttered and rolled over on the couch, snuggling up against the cushions. The wolf howled again, this time in pain, and Hermione sat up suddenly. Wiping tears from her cheeks that she never knew were there, she rose and closed her eyes. Raising her arms up, she transformed into a raven and flew out of the open window.

"Hermione...are you sure you want to do this?" he whispers, softly.

"Only if you want to," she replies, and rests her head on his neck. He runs a hand through her hair, and kisses her.

"Just remember I love you, okay?"

"Okay."

The raven flies over the forest until it comes to the enclosure that the wolf is caged in. Perching on one of the metal bars, it looks around for the wolf. The wolf is curled up in a corner, nursing a bleeding paw. Pulling its wings close, the raven drops between the bars and flies over to the wolf. Landing on the ground nearby, the raven pulls over a leaf that the wolf then uses to cover the wound.

The wolf growls softly, and the raven's beak twists into what might be called a smile. Tucking its head under its wing, the raven falls softly asleep. When the light has risen once more, and the wolf is back to his human state, the raven awakens.

Hermione transformed back into her human form and shook her hair out. Her arms were stiff from sitting in the sleeping position of the raven, and she took some time before the feeling was back in them. Looking up, she saw that Remus was still asleep. Taking her wand from her pocket, she began to heal his wounds.

Just as she was healing the final cut, Remus groaned softly and opened his eyes. He smiled as his vision came into focus and he saw her there.

"Morning," he croaked, and sat up. Hermione kissed him softly on the lips and helped him up.

"Good morning yourself," she replied, smiling. They walked back to the cabin, Remus' arm resting on Hermione's shoulder for support.

"Remus," Hermione whispered, urgently. "Remus, wake up! The castle is being attacked!" Remus sat up suddenly, and reached for his wand. He got up and pulled his robes on quickly.

"Where, and who?" he asked, doing up the clasp on his robes.

"Death Eaters, South entrance," she replied. "We've got to evacuate Ravenclaw Tower and get the students and their families into the Forest." Remus groaned.

"Oh joy," he grumbled as the two of them ran out of the room, cloaks flailing out behind them.

"I got an owl from Albus this morning," Hermione said, as she poured out two glasses of orange juice. Remus looked up.

"Dementors?" he asked, as he ran a hand through his hair. Hermione nodded.

"They're on our side. Arthur thinks we've got them all now. They're going back to Azkaban on Friday." Remus grimaced, and took a sip of his orange juice.

"And Hogwarts?" Hermione sighed, and sat next to Remus on the couch.

"Still under Death Eater control," she replied, resting her head on his shoulder. "Albus says that Wormtail's helping them - apparently you made more than one copy of the Marauder's map." Remus nodded, and kissed the top of Hermione's head. He ran his fingers through her hair, and she twisted her body so that she was looking up into his eyes. He smiled, weakly, and kissed her again.

"Welcome to the headquarters of the Phoenix," began Albus, his hands clasped in front of him on the table. "I would first like to thank all of you for turning up so quickly. As you know, we have lost Hogwarts to the Death Eaters, and so we will now be using this hall," he gestured to the room "as our meeting place. Now Professor McGonagall will read out the assignments for this week."

"Assignment one," McGonagall read. "Agents Fletcher, Weasley (Fred), Weasley (George). Infiltrate the Ministry housing at Redhill that was taken over by Death Eaters. Recover stolen artefacts including the Mirror of Erised." Fred and George looked at each other and sighed. "Assignment two, Agents Potter, Black. Attack and recover control of Hogsmeade. You have ten Ministry hit-wizards accompanying you." Harry groaned, and rubbed his temples with his fingers. Damned headache.

"Assignment three," McGonagall began, and paused. She leant down and whispered to Albus, "are you sure you want her to do this?" Albus nodded, and McGonagall straightened, a pained look on her face. "Assignment three, Agent Granger." Hermione looked up. McGonagall took a deep breath, and Hermione tensed at the look on her former Professor's face. "Acting under an alibi and disguised, seduce Death Eater Severus Snape in order to obtain information on Dark movement." Hermione choked, and put a hand over her mouth. Harry stared at Dumbledore, who cast a weary look at Hermione, and lowered his head in respect.

"Herm?" she heard a voice ask. "Hermione, wake up," Remus said, a tone of worry in his voice. Hermione's eyes snapped open, and she looked up at him.

"Not again," she groaned, and let herself fall against Remus' chest. She looked up at him. "What was it this time?"

"The Order of the Phoenix," he replied. She grimaced and cast her eyes down to her left forearm where the Dark Mark stained her olive coloured skin. He saw her angered gaze, and whispered softly to her. "It wasn't your fault they caught you. We all know that, we know it was hard for you too..." she sniffed, and Remus wrapped his arms around her. "It wasn't your fault," he whispered. She looked up at him, eyes pleading.

"But you got hurt," she cried softly. "I shouldn't have been so stupid, if I hadn't you wouldn't have come after me..." he shook his head.

"Hermione, I would have come after you anyway," he whispered, and stroked her cheek with his hand. "I love you."