Nothing But The Truth

I walked through the silent corridors, my footsteps reverberating off the polished floorboards. I looked down at my hands, half-expecting to see blood on them, but of course there was none.

An old Muggle song drifted into my head, a song that had lodged in my memories a long time ago. That had been her fault, too. She loved that song.

Mama, just killed a man
Put a gun against his head
Pulled my trigger, now he's dead

I hadn't meant to do it. I had found my wand in my hand, and in a moment of madness, whispered those two most feared words in the wizarding world. I had tried to tell myself that it was her fault; if she hadn't become involved with me, if she hadn't made the first move, then maybe things would have been different, but I knew that it would have happened anyway.

And now I had returned home, and I had to look into the honest, placid face of my mother as she asked about my day. I couldn't lie to her. I would either have to avoid her for the rest of my life or tell the truth.

"There you are - where have you been?"

It was my father. Lucius. I looked up slowly into the grey eyes that were so much like my own, eyes that were full of lies and deceit and cold cruelty.

"Out."

"Where?"

"I just met...someone." The truth so far, although I didn't mind lying to Lucius; after all, it had been done vice versa many a time before.

"A girl?"

"No. Just a friend."

My father's eyes swept over me, looking suspicious, but he said nothing.

"Be on your way, then. Your mother wishes to speak to you; she is in the library."

She was indeed in the library, her pale blue eyes full of a childlike honesty. Narcissa, Lucius' puppet - he controlled almost her every move, but she was allowed half an hour's free speech a day, and she always chose to speak to me.

She put her hands either side of my face and kissed me softly, and then asked me to sit down and tell her what I had done that day.

Mama, life had just begun
But now I've gone and thrown it all away
Mama, didn't mean to make you cry
If I'm not back again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters

So I told her. I told her everything. Slowly, her eyes filled up with tears; she said nothing, but held me to her, our tears flowing down each other's shoulders.

"I'm sorry, mama," I whispered.

She looked into my eyes, and I felt as though she could see right into my soul.

"Who?" she asked me softly.

"Ronald Weasley."

"Oh, Draco," she murmured, and then she wept again. "Your promised me that there would be no more rivalry; no more fighting...you promised me..."

"I'm sorry, mama," I said again. She remained silent for a moment, and then looked up.

"Why?"

"A girl. Hermione Granger."

"Ah, I remember her...a little girl, with long brown hair, and pretty eyes, and freckles on her nose."

I smiled bitterly through my tears. There had been nothing little about Hermione when I had last seen her. If only I had never returned her kisses; if only I had shunned her from the start; if only, if only...

"Forbidden love?"

"Yes," I answered. "The fight...it was over her. She promised to come away with me; promised to meet me...only he came instead."

"Oh, Draco..."

Too late, my time has come
Sends shivers down my spine
Body's aching all the time

"They'll come for me, mama."

"I know."

"I'm so scared...I don't want to die, mama. The Dementors...I will go mad in weeks; days, even - and then what will become of me?"

"You must be strong, Draco," she said firmly. "Please...for me."

"What's the use? I can't protect you from Azkaban."

"I know you can't, but knowing that you are there will help me."

The door burst open. Lucius stood in the doorway; behind him, I saw silhouettes lurking behind him. There was a cold, almost satisfied look on his face.

"Well, well, Draco," he said. "You have been a naughty boy, haven't you?"

I didn't know how he could possibly know - there had been nothing at the scene to prove that it was me, nothing...

He held up my wand, twirling it between his fingers.

"You left this at the crime scene," he said smoothly. "Of course, I recognised it was yours instantly; how stupid of you, Draco, to treat your wand with Oakbalm polish. The Malfoys are the only family in Europe, if not the world, who use that particular polish."

I watched, horrified, as he snapped my wand like a twig. I felt a tug at my heart, as though he had snapped a part of me.

Goodbye everybody - I've got to go
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth
Mama, I don't want to die
I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all

"Come now, Draco," he said, placing the snapped wand in his pocket. "They are here for you already, of course..."

He stepped to one side, and two Dementors glided into the room. Mother took one look at them and fainted; I went dizzy and had to struggle to stay on my feet as they each took one of my arms and began to drag me from the room.

I cast a look over my shoulder. He stood by my mother, a self-satisfied smirk on his face. He always saw me as a rival, right from the moment that I hit puberty. It was always his dream to see me fail. He was always terrified that my mother loved me more than him, which she did, of course.

I fainted as the Dementors were carrying me from the manor, and knew nothing of my ordeal until I awoke in Azkaban in the early hours of the next morning.

So began my life as an Azkaban prisoner.