No Longer Young and Whole

The grungy kitchen of Number Twelve Grimmauld Place was covered with balloons, ribbons, glitter, and banners for the celebration of Harry's fifteenth birthday. Sitting in a shadowed corner, I watched Harry, Ron, Fred and George huddled in a group chatting animatedly with Mundungus Fletcher. Hermione and Ginny were giggling with Molly as she finished icing a large chocolate cake. And Sirius, Mad-Eye, Kinsley, and Arthur occupied themselves with a heated discussion about our last Order meeting with Dumbledore and Snape. I smiled grimly, glancing eagerly at the door hoping to see the one face I was most excited to see tonight. I hadn't seen her for quite a while now. Our work for the Order separated us for long periods of time, and I constantly missed seeing her whenever she returned to Grimmauld Place.

Everyone was dressed elegantly in their dress robes, tuxes, and dresses, and Molly had decided to turn on music for dancing. I owned only one tux, the one I bought for James and Lily's wedding, but after Sirius helped me groom myself before the party, I thought I looked quite dashing. Although, comparing myself to Sirius' new, clean appearance, I was once again only second best. I sighed and hummed quietly to myself, listening to the buzz of chatter and music. I felt a warm hand grasp my shoulder.

"Hey, Moony, why so glum?" Sirius asked, tossing his newly cropped hair away from his stormy grey eyes.

He grabbed a chair and sat next to me, pulling me into a one-handed hug.

"I don't know," I answered quietly. "Just tired I suppose."

He laughed heartily. "Right, Rem. You're just tired."

I smiled, and heard the door creak open. I glanced up. Nymphadora Tonks stood in the doorway dressed in a striking little black dress draping to just above her knee, her pale, plump breasts pushed upward from the deep 'V' in her dress. She was sporting flowing ebony hair instead of her usual bubblegum pink spiky mane. A red rose was nestled behind her ear and a diamond necklace graced her bare neck. A pair of black stilettos dazzled her feet. As she stepped into the dim light of the kitchen, she faltered.

Molly bustled forward to catch her, and Nymphadora smiled nervously. Hermione and Ginny hurried over and began to talk excitedly with Nymphadora, as she waved to everyone in the room.

I looked toward Sirius' face. A sly smile crept onto his face.

"Nice choice, Moony." He clapped me hard on the back. "Tonks is a real good pick."

My face reddened with embarrassment and I looked away. "There are complications, though, Sirius."

He paused. "Remus John Lupin. Just because you're a werewolf doesn't mean..."

"Well, yes, there's that," I began slowly. "But I'm also too old for her. Too old and too poor."

"Remus, please," he moaned irritably. "It's not like you're in love with her. I mean you just fancy her, right?"

My amber eyes met his, and he raised his eyebrows in surprise.

"Moony? Are you really? I mean, how long have you fancied her for?"

I glanced back at Nymphadora's creamy bare back, swathed in soft ebony locks. "Since I first saw her. I met Dumbledore in the Hog's Head for an interview for the Defence Against the Dark Arts post two years ago. I saw her there, studying for her Auror schooling."

Sirius laughed loudly. "Rem! How can it have been that long! And you haven't done anything to further your relationship with her? Do you expect her to just see you one day and ask for your hand in marriage? I mean, honestly, Moony..."

My face felt hot. "Well, no..."

"Moony, come with me. We're talking with her right now." He stood abruptly and tugged me to my feet.

"Sirius, no! I'm thirty-seven and completely capable of talking to her myself!"

He grinned widely. "What? I can't enjoy a chat with my second cousin? No, Rem, I'm coming too."

He steered me across the room, toward the table piled with food where Nymphadora, Hermione, Ginny, and Molly now sat. My face burned.

"Hey, Tonks. Nice outfit," Sirius began, holding my arm in a vice-like grip so that I couldn't escape.

She turned in her seat and smiled at Sirius and me.

"Wotcher Sirius, Remus." Her face reddened. "Oh this? Hermione and Ginny helped me with it. Thanks anyway."

Ginny and Hermione glanced at each other and attempted to hide a giggle. Molly beamed.

"I, er, I mean, we, are going to chat with Harry and Ron," Hermione began, grabbing Ginny from her seat. "Later Tonks, Mrs. Weasley. And see you Sirius, Professor Lupin."

Hermione and Ginny hurried away, sniggering uncontrollably.

"Perhaps I will join Arthur." Mrs. Weasley smiled kindly. "Sirius, would you like to join me?"

"I'd love to Molly." He offered her his hand, and led her away from Nymphadora and me. But not before he nudged my ribs and winked.

There was a long awkward pause.

"Remus, you can sit down, you know. I don't bite."

I smiled uneasily, and sat down on the bench beside her.

She gasped and covered her mouth with her hand. "Oh sorry, Remus! I didn't mean..." Her cheeks turned pink.

"Don't worry about it. Understandable, Nymphadora."

She rolled her eyes in annoyance. "Will you stop calling me that?"

"Sorry, Nymphadora." I smiled comfortably. "But I prefer your first name. It's very pretty." I blushed again.

She smiled. "Thanks." Her small hand grazed my arm. "Do you fancy a dance, Remus?"

A Latin salsa song echoed throughout the room. I'm not a very good dancer.

"Er, all right." I took her hand nervously and led her to the centre of the room. "Are you sure you can dance in those things?" I nodded toward her feet.

"Ginny helped me learn to keep my balance and dance gracefully. Hopefully my hard work has paid off." Her teeth glittered in a wide smile.

She grasped my hand and placed her own on my shoulder, as I slowly led my hand to her waist.

As we began to dance, a voice boomed across the dance floor.

"Hey, Rem, Tonks!" Sirius was dancing wildly with the young Ginny Weasley, whose face was scarlet. "Have fun Tonks, Remus has some brilliant moves!" He winked and whirled by.

I smiled, my face now a permanent shade of red. "Ignore him, please. I'm not a great dancer."

"Don't worry about it. Neither am I."

As we began to dance, I watched my partner in awe. Ginny had done an incredible job teaching Nymphadora. I felt her body move seamlessly to the music, and her face glowed with a light sheen of perspiration. I wasn't much of a salsa dancer, but I caught on soon enough.

When the song ended, she paused and took my hand.

"Remus, come outside with me, I'm stifling." She gasped for breath.

"All right."

She pulled me toward the door, as people continued to dance around the room, laughter and chatter muffled the sounds of our departure. We slipped through the door, to the corridor, and crept out the front door. Careful not to wake Mrs. Black's sleeping portrait.

The velvet night sky was riddled with twinkling stars, and the full moon had just begun to wane. Nymphadora pulled me down to sit next to her on the stoop in front of Number Twelve.

"It's a beautiful night, isn't it?" Her face was illuminated by the bright moon. She still held my hand loosely, and turned to look me in the face. "Remus? Can I tell you something?"

"Of course, Nymphadora." A smile graced my warm face.

She grimaced slightly by the sound of her name. "Remus, I really enjoy being your colleague in the Order and your friend, but..."

She looked away, and my palms began to sweat. "I think I...I think I feel the same way."

She glared at me, shock radiated in her eyes. "You...you do?"

"I hope we're talking about the same feeling." I chuckled lightly.

"I really fancy you, Remus," she whispered, her fingers twiddling in my grasp. She avoided my gaze.

"I can't Nymphadora," I replied sadly after a long pause. "I'm too...old..."

She grabbed my forearm. "No Remus! Don't say that! I don't care!"

"Too old....too poor..."

"Don't worry about it, Remus! Please, stop! I don't care!"

"...and too dangerous."

"Stop it! Don't do this to me!" Her hands gripped my shoulders, shaking slightly. Tears glimmered in her eyes.

"I just...can't, Nymphadora." I looked away, ashamed with myself. "This can't happen. You need someone...young...and whole."

She let go of me, and wept silently into her hands. I tugged at my trousers, anger pulsing through my body. I watched pools of tears fall from her face as she turned to look at me again.

"I can't let this feeling go, Remus."

And with that, she pulled my shoulders toward her, and my lips met hers. I lost myself in the warmth of her mouth. My hands fiddled idly with her long locks as I ran them up and down her back. It was when I felt the heat of her hands playing with the buttons on my shirt that I drew away.

She looked startled. "Remus?"

"Nymphadora, I...I can't do this," I stuttered.

I quickly got up and left through the front door. I jogged to my room near Sirius', and collapsed onto the bed. After minutes of punching pillows, I fell asleep.

***

Someone was shaking me. "Hey, Rem. Wake up."

I opened my eyes groggily, and looked up to find a blurred figure bent over me.

"Moony, get your bloody arse out of bed." My body shook more violently.

"What, Padfoot? What do you want?" I asked irritably.

The bed creaked under the tension of the added weight of Sirius.

"Well? I saw you leave the kitchen with Tonks. What did you two do?" He nudged my shoulder. "How was it, Moony?" He grinned.

"Horrible, Sirius..."

"What?!" He pulled me to a sitting position. I glanced out the curtained window. There was morning sunlight pouring through the glass. "Moony? You can't be that bad a snogger, can you?"

I smiled weakly. "No, that part was brilliant." I looked away. "No, I told her the truth, Sirius."

"What truth? That you fancy her?"

"Well, yes, I told her that," I replied, annoyed with his ongoing questions. "She apparently fancies me too..."

"Yeah, I knew that, Rem." He waved his hand irritably.

"You did?" My eyes bulged in surprise.

"Molly could tell there was something going on between you two." He grinned wickedly.

"Right..." My face began to burn once again. "Anyway, I told her the truth, Sirius." I paused. "I told her we couldn't do this."

Sirius grabbed my shoulders and shook me hard. "Remus! You idiot! Why did you have to go and tell her that?"

"Well, Sirius, it true." My smile left my face. "I'm too old for her..."

He laughed. "Rem, don't say that! That makes me feel old! And I don't want to feel old! I lost thirteen years of my life in Azkaban!"

"Sirius, you're not someone who is forced to transform painfully each month. It really ages me fast." My body felt heavy with despair. "Besides, I'm too poor..."

"Remus John Lupin! Stop it immediately! Money does not matter when you're faced with love! Look at Molly and Arthur!"

"Sirius." I looked him sadly in the eye. "I'm way too dangerous."

Sirius looked down, thinking silently. After a long pause, his cloudy grey eyes locked with mine. "Remus, you are an incredible person, and I've been your close friend for years."

As I began a retort, he interrupted. "Yes, I know we've had difficult times, but we've forgiven each other, haven't we? But, Remus, your condition does not change the way I feel about you. I'm so lucky to have you." He hugged me hard and slapped my back.

As we sat there hugging on the edge of the bed, a knock came from the door. We broke apart instantly.

"Sirius, Remus, breakfast is ready," came Molly's voice from the hallway.

Sirius grabbed my hand and pulled me to the door. "Come on, Moony. We're going to fix this problem."

***

I stared at Nymphadora's saddened face further down the table. She looked down at her plate, while Ginny and Hermione tried to comfort her.

Sirius sat next to me, patting my back, telling me not to worry. Harry looked over, concern etched in his face.

"Is there something wrong, Lupin?" He looked toward Sirius for an answer. "Hermione and Ginny were talking about something, but they wouldn't share it with us."

"It's nothing, Harry," I answered quietly.

"Is there anything I can do to help?"

"Actually, yes," Sirius replied, his voice lifting cheerfully. "Could we borrow your Firebolt? Say, tonight perhaps?"

I glanced at Sirius' cunning face, an idea forming in his mind.

"Sure! Of course! I'll get it for you after breakfast then!" he answered happily and returned to his breakfast.

"Sirius?" I asked suspiciously. "What the hell are you thinking of doing?"

"A midnight broom ride, mate," he replied confidently. "I'd let you use my old Comet, but it's nothing compared to Harry's Firebolt." He smiled deviously.

"Great, Padfoot," I grumbled. "Really great."

***

I was always the worst flier--next to Wormtail--during our time at Hogwarts. James, of course, was spectacular, and Sirius was never far behind. I had a knack for getting too nervous and slipping on my broom, just barely able to hang on and avoid falling off completely. I had gotten better over the years, able to fly calmly and relaxed, but it still wasn't my favourite pastime. Or way of transportation for that matter, it was mentally hard enough for me to fly from Surrey to London over night when the Advanced Guard picked Harry up from his house.

Around midday, I caught Nymphadora before she left Grimmauld Place to continue her work for the Order. She looked angry when I asked to speak with her privately in the corridor, but when I asked if she would like to spend some time alone tonight with me, she smiled shyly.

My stomach was bursting after Molly's wonderful dinner, but I ignored the pain as I sat on my bed staring out the window of my bedroom. I was sweating slightly, feeling a bit nervous. After all, I hadn't had a formal 'date' since I was seventeen. I heard my bedroom door creak open, and I turned suddenly. Sirius' long figure was leaning in the door frame. His black hair falling attractively to his stormy grey eyes and his signature smirk etched wide across his face. His casual elegance was something I had always envied, even at my age, when he had spent thirteen years in Azkaban and I had not. He rolled up the sleeves of his white button-up shirt, his muscular forearms gleaming.

"Mooooony," he whined "Aren't you sooo thrilled?"

"I'm nervous, Padfoot." I smiled weakly. "As always."

"Yeah, I haven't forgotten your date with Veruca Wallace in our sixth year." He smiled and joined me on the edge of the bed. "You almost pissed yourself before it. I must admit you were quite lucky to catch a girl like her."

"Thanks." I chuckled quietly. "You're really helping, Sirius."

"Sorry, Rem, but you were never a very confident bloke." He wrapped a comforting arm around my shoulder. "Don't worry, Tonks is a great girl. You'll be fine."

"I can't believe we're having this discussion at our age," I moaned irritably.

Sirius laughed and got up to leave. As he left through the door, his voice echoed down the corridor: "Don't do anything rash, Rem. Remember...she's my second cousin, and if I hear anything about..."

"SIRIUS! SHUT UP!" I yelled. I snickered to myself, and felt my fluttering heart relax. It's just Nymphadora.

***

I heard my bedside clock strike midnight. I had fallen asleep! I quickly got up and stole a glimpse in the mirror. I tamed my tawny hair and slapped face awake. I grabbed Harry's Firebolt from near the door and rushed to Nymphadora's bedroom next to Ginny and Hermione's. I rapped on the door and heard a voice call:

"One minute please!"

I recognized Ginny's sweet voice. Brilliant. This is going to be awkward.

There was soft chatter and a flurry of excitement on the other side of the door. Finally the door flew open to emit the smiling face of Hermione framed by a busy chestnut mane.

"Good evening, Professor." Her smile widened as a bustle continued behind her.

"Hermione, I'm no longer your professor. You may call me Remus if you would like." I returned a smile.

"Hermione! She's ready!" came Ginny's voice from within the room.

Ginny's flaming red hair emerged behind Hermione. "Oh, hello, Lupin. Tonks is all set." She winked and blushed.

Hermione nudged the door open wide, and pulled Ginny out of the way. Nymphadora stood near her bed dressed in a white skirt grazing to the middle of her thighs, a lacy pink halter, and a pair of casual sandals adorning her feet. She was wearing another new hairstyle: wavy golden brown locks flowing down past her shoulders. I smiled nervously.

"Hi, Remus." She smiled timidly. "Ginny and Hermione seem to be enjoying fixing me up lately."

"I can see that." I offered my hand and she walked over to take it. "Well, you look nice."

"Thanks." She turned to the young teenagers. "And leave us alone Ginny, Hermione."

Ginny winked and shut the door.

I held the Firebolt in my left hand and held Nymphadora's hand in my right. Her small hand was soft and trembling. I wasn't the only one who was nervous.

I looked toward her as we entered the front corridor. "Nymphadora? I'm sorry about yesterday. I..."

"Don't worry. I understand, Remus." Her eyes met mine, and she smiled warmly. She glanced at the broom in my hand. "So, what are we doing tonight?"

"Flying."

Her hand tightened in my grasp, and she edged nearer to me. "You're so romantic, Remus Lupin. And I love it." She kissed my cheek softly as we stepped out into the dark night. My face felt hot.

I placed myself on the broom on a soft patch of grass, kicking off my shoes and socks. Nymphadora followed suit and arranged herself behind me.

"A Firebolt, Remus?" She giggled as she wrapped her arms around my waist and chest, pulling her warm body extremely close to mine. "This'll be quite a joy ride."

"Harry taught me how to avoid going too fast," I answered calmly, feeling every contour of her body against my back. "I chose to use it because of its smooth flying, Nymphadora."

"Right." She tightened her grasp to give me a warm hug. "We're off then."

I kicked off and flew toward the starry sky. The breeze was cool on my face, and I kept a firm hold on the broom. Nymphadora's grasp on my waist tightened greatly, her breasts pressed hard against my back. Her face was nestled just below my neck. After the first shock of jolting speed, I slowed slightly and began to wind around London, catching the sight of the sparkling city lights far below.

Nymphadora began to slowly massage my stomach, her bare legs and feet grazing my calves and thighs. Her lips had found my bare neck, and she had begun to smother my neck and back with kisses. Not now, Nymphadora. I need to concentrate. I was enjoying her every touch, but could not let my concentration stray.

After a while, I felt a shiver run through my body, and decided to descend.

"Where are we going, Remus?" came Nymphadora's voice near my ear.

"You'll see," I answered, turning my face quickly so she could hear my reply.

We descended to a small hillock outside of London. The grass had a violet tint and the trees surrounding the knoll were exceptionally tall and thin. Golden leaves whispered in the trees as we lowered ourselves onto the hidden patch of grass.

When I felt the long, soft grass beneath my bare feet, my body relaxed. The Firebolt dropped from between our legs and I turned to face Nymphadora. But before I could say a word, I felt my back hit the soft grass.

Nymphadora held my shoulders firmly and straddled my waist. I looked up into her face, slightly surprised. She smiled down at me, her long auburn hair framing her beautiful face. She swooped low and began to kiss me hard. I held her waist and pulled her close. She moaned quietly as our legs entwined and our bodies moulded together. Once again, I pushed away, and tore myself from her grasp.

"Remus...please...not again," she whimpered.

"I can't do this," I answered weakly.

She giggled, her face turning slightly pink. "You don't mean..."

I paused, perplexed. I caught on, my face burning. "Oh! No! Bloody hell, no, Nymphadora!"

"Well, you did say..." She crawled toward me. "Well in that case, shall we continue?"

I edged away. "I shouldn't be doing this with you, Nymphadora."

"What? Am I too young to have sex, Remus?" she shot at me, angry.

"No, no," I answered feebly. "It's not that, Nymphadora. I mean, you shouldn't be doing this with me."

"Remus, stop it! I want you, can't you see that? I want you! I don't care if you're older, poorer, and more dangerous! I LOVE YOU!" she cried, tears streaming down her pale face.

I faltered, shocked. "W-w-what? What did you say?"

She crept closer to me and grasped my shoulder firmly, gazing into my eyes. "I love you, Remus Lupin."

"You do?" I stuttered, appalled. "Nymphadora, you're only..."

"Twenty-one. I know, Remus. But I love you. I can feel it, and it's amazing. I could care less that you're..."

"Thirty-seven, unemployed, and a werewolf?" I finished tiredly. "You deserve better, Nymphadora."

"Not if you're the best, Remus." She smiled seductively and kissed me sweetly.

"I don't know..." I turned away.

"Do you love me, Remus?" she asked quietly, her warm breath making me shudder.

I looked at her face, young and innocent, pale and beautiful. "Yes. I love you very much, Nymphadora."

She smiled calmly. "There. We both love each other. Now, when are we getting married?"

"What? Married? Nymphadora, we can't..."

"Why not?"

"Well, Nymphadora. Think about our future together. Years from now."

She paused, thinking. "It looks beautiful, Remus."

My brow furrowed. "Nymphadora, I will age faster than you. I'm sixteen years older than you. I'm unemployed, we won't have much money. And then, there's my condition." I looked away, ashamed.

"You're so sexy to my eyes, Remus." She played with my tawny locks and grazed my cheek with her finger. Her dark eyes locked with my amber ones. "As for a job, I'm an Auror, Remus. Molly and Arthur married and had seven children out of pure love. They may not have much money, but their family love is so beautiful." She paused. "As for your condition, I accept it. I'm willing to help and comfort you each and every month, Remus."

A thought entered my mind; I tried to voice it effectively. "Nymphadora, since we're imagining a life together, what about...er..."

"Children?" She smiled demurely and kissed my neck softly. "I'd be honoured to have your children, Remus." She giggled softly. "Let's have millions."

I moaned at her touch and her words, but continued with my concern. "Children, Nymphadora. Is it, er, possible? I mean, considering, my condition?"

She paused between her kisses. "I'm sure it's possible, Remus." She looked into my eyes, worried. "But, is it...safe?"

"I'm not sure. I don't know who to even ask." I thought hard.

"You could ask, er, Dumbledore." She snickered. "He'd probably know."

"What an awkward conversation that'll be." I paused, picturing the odd image. "'Dumbledore, sir, if I have sex with Nymphadora, will our children be safe?'"

She laughed loudly. "Just be honest, Remus. It's a good question. Have Sirius help you."

"Oh, he'll make the situation so much better," I complained.

There was silence.

"Remus? Were we just discussing our life together?"

"Y-yes," I answered nervously.

"Then..." She looked at me, her eyes sparkling in the moonlight.

"Nymphadora Tonks, will you marry me?" I asked, gazing intently into her eyes.

Tears formed in her eyes and she smiled. She leaned forward, her body pressed hard against mine. Her tear-stained face inches from my own. "Of course, Remus Lupin." She kissed me hard on the mouth.

***

By the time we returned to Number Twelve Grimmauld Place, the sky was beginning to gleam red and purple. I hadn't allowed Nymphadora to continue far on her 'little adventure' after she had agreed to marry me, declaring that we savour the moment when we're finally married. She compromised grudgingly, but remained happy nonetheless.

We arrived at the house silently, using the routine method of reading Dumbledore's message (he was the Secret Keeper of the Order after all), and secretly entered through the front door. We crept, hand-in-hand, to our respective rooms, kissing goodbye before we separated.

"Pst! Remus! Pst!" Came a voice from inside my shadowy room.

"Brilliant," I mumbled.

I shut the door soundlessly and turned on the oil lamp with the aid of my wand.

"Remmy!" A large figure suffocated me in a tight embrace. "Remmy! How was it?!"

"Geroff me, Sirius!" I pushed him off, and look away.

"Oh, no. What happened? Did you let slip you were gay or something?" He chuckled.

I turned quickly, slightly angry. "What? No!! No, no. Sirius, please, you're such a prat." I paused and smiled. "Sirius, I'm getting married."

His eyes locked with mine and he froze. "You're what?"

"Getting married. To Nymphadora Tonks."

His jaw dropped and his eyes bulged in shock. He gaped at me oddly. I couldn't stifle my laughter.

"Sirius, shut your mouth, you look like a fish."

"You're getting married??"

"Aren't I allowed to?" I asked, confused.

"You're getting..." His face was relaxing, comprehension washing over him. He laughed loudly and began to jump up and down. He hugged me tightly again. "Remus is getting married, Remus is getting married..." He sang.

"Stop it! Sirius, you idiot, people are sleeping!"

"Not anymore!" he yelled cheerfully.

He let go and skipped loudly through the corridors, banging on the walls and doors. I ran to the doorway, and shouted:

"SIRIUS! SHUT UP!"

He ignored my warning and continued to skip down the hallway and down flights of steps. Sleepy and confused heads began to emerge from doorways, watching the lively Sirius Black gallop through the house, singing.

My face began to burn with embarrassment and I walked to Nymphadora's room. Before I reached it, though, she appeared from Ginny and Hermione's room, red-faced and furious.

"Remus!" She grabbed the front of my robes. "You told him?"

"Well, yes..." I said, noticing my mistake. "He's my best mate," I added proudly.

She smiled. "Everyone will find out soon anyway."

She kissed my cheek softly. We continued to amuse ourselves by watching the thirty-seven year old man frolic throughout the house, singing at the top of his lungs, now with the aid of his mother's spectacular voice.

***

Everyone was filing out of the kitchen and muttering about the meeting in low voices. I waved goodbye to members of the Order as they left the kitchen of Grimmauld Place. Sirius held my shoulder firmly and Nymphadora grasped my hand as we wandered toward the head of the table where an ancient looking wizard stood talking quietly to Severus Snape.

"Well, thank you Albus, I do try my best," Severus finished his conversation silkily.

"Yes, you're doing very well, Severus. Thank you for your continuous hard work for the Order," replied Dumbledore kindly.

"Well hello, Snivelly," Sirius growled.

"Oh, why it's Sirius Black!" he answered in mock surprise. "The one man who can't do a thing for the Order!" His lip curled cruelly.

I held Sirius back firmly. "Sirius. Not now."

"Oh, that won't help him, Lupin. His head's so bulbous, nothing can deflate that thing," he muttered harshly and left with a swish of his massive black cloak.

Sirius continued to grumble through gritted teeth, as I turned to face Dumbledore. His wise face glowing amusedly.

"Good day, Remus, Sirius, Nymphadora." He nodded kindly to each of us in turn.

"Albus, I have a question to ask you." My face began to redden.

"Pertaining to the Order, Remus?" he asked gently.

"Well, no." I looked away, embarrassed.

Nymphadora released my hand. "Dumbledore, sir, Remus and I are getting married."

Dumbledore looked from me to Nymphadora to Sirius, smiling gleefully. "Well, what wonderful news! Congratulations to you both."

"Thank you, sir," I replied, my fingers fidgeting with my robes. "I would like to ask, though, do you know if...er..."

"Does this pertain to children, Remus?" Dumbledore inquired benignly, his light blue eyes twinkling. "And your condition?"

"Well, yes, sir, it does," I replied more confidently. "Please, I wasn't sure if my, er, condition would affect..."

"Your children?" He thought for a moment. "Well, it of course wouldn't hurt Nymphadora." He smiled at her. "Children, though..." His brow furrowed. "Remus." His eyes locked with mine; he looked slightly crestfallen. "There is a risk that one of your children may be born with your condition, whether it be in its entirety or not."

I looked away, once again ashamed of my horrible contagious disease. I felt Nymphadora's comforting hand on my back.

"Is there anything Remus can do?" Sirius asked, concerned.

Dumbledore glanced at my best friend, and smiled warmly. "There may be potions, Sirius, but other than that, I'm afraid not."

"Thank you, Albus." Nymphadora's kind eyes met Dumbledore's. "Thank you."

"My pleasure."

I looked up and smiled weakly.

"Good luck to you both. I presume the wedding is soon, then?"

"Next week. Anyone may come. It will be at..." I began, as sadness filled my heart.

"Godric's Hollow, Albus," Sirius finished softly. "And the reception is here. Molly will be in charge of that, of course." A smirk crossed his face.

"Ah, I see," Dumbledore replied. "I will be sure to attend. Marriages are most beautiful during times like this." His smile was sad as he turned to leave. "Good day to you all. And congratulations once again, Remus, Nymphadora."

There was a long silence that followed as Dumbledore left the kitchen. Nymphadora's hand was still kindly rubbing my back, and Sirius looked downward, pensively.

"Remus?" Nymphadora's soft voice drew me from my reverie. "Remus, I would still like to have children."

Sirius chuckled. "Nice. I guess I should leave you two lovebirds then." And he swiftly exited the kitchen.

I looked into her dark eyes, concern etched in her face. "Nymphadora, I will do anything for you." She smiled. "If you would like children, I can give that to you."

She pulled me close, my arms wrapped tightly around her waist and her arms secured around my neck.

"Not without my help, Remus." She giggled seductively.

I kissed her feverishly, my hands groping further down her back. Her hand quickly slapped my arm. I pulled away, grimacing in pain.

"What was that for?"

"Remus, I'm following your own bloody rules." Her hand held my cheek. "No touching or fondling for that matter, until we're married. You're not trying to break your own rule, are you, Mr. Lupin?" She smiled slyly.

"Absolutely not," I said, feeling a bit angry with myself.

"Good." And she slapped my butt as she left the kitchen.

***

I glanced toward my bedroom window; the sun was bursting brightly through the curtains. I smiled happily. Today is a wonderful day. Just as I carefully removed myself from my bed, the door burst open.

"REMMY! TODAY'S YOUR LUCKY DAY!"

I was instantly smothered in an embrace that consisted of more than just one body. I tried to focus my blurry eyes, and caught the forms of five figures. Sirius was kissing my face in excitement, and Harry, Ron, Fred, and George were all squeezing the breath out of me.

"LUPIN! WE'RE SO HAPPY FOR YOU!" I heard Harry and Ron's voices from beneath the suffocation of multiple cloaks and bodies.

"Enjoy yourself tonight, Lupin." The twins winked.

My face felt hot as they all released me. I looked from face to face, happiness and excitement shining in each one.

"You're practically related to us now." Ron hugged me once more. "And to Sirius too."

"That's exciting. Although, I'm not sure I want to be related to such a wild and crazy man." I smiled wickedly toward Sirius, and punched his shoulder.

"Funny, Moony," he grumbled. "Just because it's your special day, I won't hit you."

"Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to get dressed." I turned to remove my dress robes and new tux from the closet. When I turned back, they hadn't moved. "Um, I said I'd like to get dressed."

"Yeah, so?" Sirius replied. "We need to get dressed too, Moony."

"Then go get dressed!" I said impatiently.

"Lupin, we need our dress robes and tuxes for us to get dressed." Harry motioned toward the closet. "Mrs. Weasley said she had put them in your room."

"Right, go on then." I opened the doors to the large closet, and they all moved forward to take their clothes.

Soon enough we were all dressed and ready. Roses adorning our tuxes, dress robes draped elegantly over the suits, and hair styled perfectly (Sirius took the longest). As we entered the kitchen, we were joined by Arthur, Charlie, Bill and Fleur, and the entire Order (excluding Severus). I looked around nervously, not expecting so many people.

I didn't spot Hermione, Ginny, or Molly in the large crowd. I assumed they were helping Nymphadora prepare herself. I smiled at the thought. I'm getting married to Nymphadora Tonks.

***

The wedding was so beautiful. Godric's Hollow in late August was stunning. I felt slightly sad to be present there, but the feeling of getting married was uplifting. The moment I saw Nymphadora, tears welled up in my eyes. Her dress was light and flowing, pure white with a single red ribbon tied just below her creamy, round breasts. I watched her float softly down the aisle, my heart pounding in my chest. White orchids graced her soft ebony locks (Ginny chose her hairstyle), and she held a bouquet of white roses with a single red rose placed delicately within the flowers. My stomach fluttered when she smiled at me; she was so beautiful. It wasn't until her silky fingers grasped my hand did I realize this wasn't a dream.

"I love you," I whispered.

"I love you too." Tears rolled down her rosy cheeks.

***

"Congratulations, Mr. Lupin." Sturgis Podmore nudged my elbow. "Nice lady you've got there." He winked.

I looked across the decorated kitchen of Grimmauld Place and gazed at my wife. Nymphadora was talking animatedly with women from the Order. The music and loud chatter of the guests echoed throughout the kitchen, but I ignored it. She was smiling and laughing, her eyes glittering and cheeks glowing pink. I couldn't tear my eyes away.

"Thanks," I replied mechanically, still staring at my wife.

"REMMY! How are we feeling, Moony?" Sirius knocked my elbow. My wine splashed onto the floor. "Oh, sorry about that, mate." He obligingly cleaned up the mess with a flick of his wand.

"Congratulations Lupin!" Harry and Ron beamed and each gave me a warm hug.

"OH REMUS! I'm so happy for you!" Molly pulled me into to an awkward embrace. "Tonks is such a wonderful woman! And she is so happy!" She looked toward Nymphadora, smiling.

"Thank you for helping Nymphadora, Hermione, Ginny." I hugged them both gratefully. "She looks stunning."

"No problem, Professor." Hermione snickered and elbowed Ginny, who smiled deviously.

"Sorry, Moony, but I love this song..." Sirius vanished in the crowd of people with Ginny by his side.

"Ginny's obsessed with him," Hermione muttered irritably.

Harry smiled, "I think Sirius likes the attention." And we watched Sirius dancing wildly with the attractive young redhead. We laughed.

"Sorry to interrupt you, Remus, but I would like to speak privately with you and Nymphadora if you don't mind."

I turned, surprised at hearing that familiar voice. Dumbledore smiled cheerfully, his face bright with happiness.

"Right. I'll go get her then." I tore Nymphadora away from her friends and led her out of the kitchen.

"What? What is it Remus?" She looked extremely concerned.

Before I could answer her, the door opened to emit the tall figure of Albus Dumbledore.

"Nymphadora, Remus." He acknowledged us each with a nod. "I have wonderful news for you both."

Nymphadora's hand tensed within my grasp. Dumbledore smiled serenely.

"If you're interested in having children, there is indeed a single, simple potion that Remus will have to consume before..." He paused, his eyes twinkling from behind his half-moon spectacles.

"Right, Albus." My face reddened. "I understand."

"And I have already concocted the first phial of the potion." He withdrew a small flask from his robes, the liquid gleamed a deep purple. "And no, Severus did not produce it. I was afraid you may not trust him to make a potion like this, Remus." He smiled.

"Thank you, Albus."

"And here's the..." He handed me the slip of parchment with the potion's ingredients and instructions. "Don't worry; it's easier than the Wolfsbane Potion."

"Thank you so much, sir." Nymphadora hugged a surprised Dumbledore.

"Good luck to you both."

***

"Good night, Remus, Nymphadora."

"G'night to you both. Congratulations."

"Later Lupin, Tonks."

"Wonderful wedding. Good night."

"Enjoy yourselves."

Guests filed slowly out the front door of Grimmauld Place, and Harry, Hermione, and the Weasley's retired to their rooms.

"Good luck, Rem." Sirius tickled my back playfully. "Enjoy yourself, you savage beast."

"Shut up, Sirius." I kneed him hard in the thigh.

"I'm right next door, Remus, better keep it down tonight."

As he began to swagger away up to his room he added quietly: "I hope it still works, Moony..." He smirked wickedly and trotted up to his room.

"They're all gone. Finally." Nymphadora sighed. She looked at me and smiled demurely. "Ready, Remus?"

"This is so awkward. But, yes, I am," I replied.

I held her waist delicately and led her up the stairs to my room. "I just wish we were alone," I muttered.

She laughed quietly. "Don't worry, he's just jealous."

***

The moonlight lit our room, illuminating it with a soft, eerie glow. I downed the potion quickly, and felt it warm my body. I walked over to Nymphadora and held her waist softly. She looked into my eyes, excitement dancing in her eyes. I smiled.

"I love you," I whispered.

She hugged me tightly, and moaned in my ear, "I love you."

She pressed her lips onto mine. Desire pulsated throughout my body, I undid her dress quickly. I held her tightly, feeling her skin hot against my touch. She had removed my cloak and jacket, and was struggling with the buttons of my shirt. I released her, smiling widely.

"Hold on a moment, Nymphadora. I don't want you to choke me." I laughed.

I hastily tore off my shirt, cummerbund, and bowtie, and tossed them to the floor. Her hands wandered slowly across my bare chest for a second; her fingertips playing with my nipples. I pulled her close again. The heat of our bodies intoxicated me as I slowly unclasped her bra, and caressed her warm breasts. She pushed me backward onto the bed, kissing my bare chest as she removed her underwear. I pulled off my boxers with slight difficulty, since our bodies were tangled so close.

"I love you," She whispered softly as she lowered herself on top of me, kissing my neck.

"I love you too," I replied, playing idly with her recently morphed pink spiky hair.

She moaned and closed her lips on mine. We rolled to find a more comfortable spot on the bed.

***

I looked outside; the sun shining brightly through the window. Its rays glittered on Nymphadora's naked body lying near me. Her head nestled just below my neck, her arm draped over my bare chest, and her leg placed perfectly between my thighs. I smiled down at her sleeping figure. Her face was beautiful and content as she lied there. I lay in that one spot until my body began to ache.

I carefully removed her limbs from on top of my body and onto the comfortable bed. I stretched and gathered pyjamas from my armoire. I looked back at her pleasantly sleeping form before I left to go downstairs.

"I love you, Nymphadora," I whispered, smiling calmly.

***

It was nearing Halloween, and each time I returned to Grimmauld Place, I found it more and more heavily decorated for the upcoming holiday. Sirius was barely seen, since he continued to embellish the old house with spider webs, pumpkins, and eerie candles, but his singing voice could always be heard throughout the house.

A large gust of autumn wind burst into the house as I entered.

"Remus! Happy holidays! Tonks is in the kitchen helping Ginny and Hermione!" Molly bustled forward to removed my cloak and take my bags.

I wandered into the newly decorated kitchen, now shimmering strangely with cobwebs, glimmering pumpkins, and creepy green-grey lights. Nymphadora was at the stove with Ginny and Hermione attempting to make a desert pudding.

"Remus!" Nymphadora turned from her spot at the stove and ran to embrace me. "I have a surprise for you." She smiled warmly.

"A surprise?" I asked kindly. "What kind of surprise? Do I have to wait until Halloween?"

Ginny and Hermione smiled. "We'll be upstairs, Tonks. Call us when the pudding's finished baking." Ginny winked and led Hermione out of the kitchen.

"What? What is it?" I asked, concerned. "Are you all right?"

"I've never felt better." She smiled happily again. "Remus, I'm pregnant."

"You're what?" My arms fell limp to my side and my jaw dropped.

"I'm going to have a baby, Remus." She kissed my cheek and pinched it. "Our baby."

I smiled, my heart fluttering uncontrollably. "Oh, Nymphadora! I'm so..."

I hugged her tightly, and tears flowed tenderly down her face.

"I know, Remus, me too," she whispered. "Me too."

***

It was the beginning of June, and Nymphadora was starting to get anxious. Her belly had swelled greatly, and she was forced to waddle around the house. Dumbledore had excused her from Order work months earlier. The Hogwarts children were nearing the end of their year at school, and the Order's concern for Harry and his scar were growing. He had been seeing snippets of Voldemort's current life as he continued his dangerous work in secret. Harry didn't understand that this connection was extremely hazardous, and that his Occlumency lessons with Severus were especially important. Dumbledore continued to worry about the young teenager; his _expression more depressed with each meeting.

The kitchen was stifling with the numerous amount of Order members piled inside. Dumbledore's voice was quiet and grave, and everyone, even Sirius and Severus, were listening intently. Nymphadora twitched by my side. I looked at her face gleaming with perspiration. She grabbed my hand painfully.

"Nymphadora, are you all right?" My brow furrowed.

She shook her head. She looked like she was in immense pain. "Remus...now, Remus...now!!" Her voice had grown into a terrified scream.

Dumbledore stopped suddenly and every face turned to look at the pair of us. Nymphadora was rocking back and forth, grasping her swollen belly. Molly gasped and rushed to her side.

"Albus! She's..." She looked back at the wizened man, anxious and excited.

Dumbledore smiled weakly. "Remus, Molly, you may help her. Good luck."

I held Nymphadora's arm and helped her from her seat. Molly attempted to calm her down as we hurried upstairs. We laid her on our bed, and I watched her scream in pain. I grew nervous, my body feeling hot and wet with sweat. I tried to calm her, but she just writhed in agony.

"Molly? What should I do?" I asked fearfully.

She turned from helping Nymphadora, and smiled. "Remus, don't worry, she's fine. This'll be stressful, yes, but don't worry. Just be there for her."

I sat next to the bed and watched Molly perform spells to reduce the pain. Nymphadora calmed slightly, but she was still frightened. It took many long, painful hours until I heard the first whimpering scream of a baby. I wanted to cry, but I remained still next to Nymphadora. She sighed and smiled widely.

"Nymphadora! Remus!" Molly held the naked baby in her arms and was rapidly cleaning it off. "It's a beautiful baby boy!"

Nymphadora relaxed her legs, and attempted to get comfortable on the sweat soaked bed. Molly handed the child to me and I leaned close to Nymphadora so she could see too. Tears poured down my face as I stared at the innocent face.

His eyes were dark blue framed by beautifully long dark lashes; thin wisps of auburn hair graced his crown. The infant smiled silently. Nymphadora's face broke into a joyful smile and tears began to mingle with the perspiration drenching her face.

"Remus...Remus...he's so...perfect."

"What's his name?" Molly joined our huddle and smiled at the infant's adorable face.

"Remus? What's our son's name?" They both looked at me. The baby gurgled.

"Daniel Jacob Lupin," I replied calmly.

"That's perfect, Remus." I kissed her wet forehead. "He looks just like you."

I smiled down at the small, content face of my son. He cooed happily.

***

"Leave Daniel with Molly, Nymphadora!" I shouted over the hysterical yells in the kitchen of Grimmauld Place.

Nymphadora rushed to Molly, and gravely handed her son to the frantic woman. She ran to my side and hugged me, sobbing.

I patted her back. "Don't worry; he'll be fine with Molly."

"I-it's...not...that," she bawled.

I lifted her chin and looked into her saddened eyes. "Nymphadora, Harry and his friends need us. We must help him. We'll be all right."

She hugged me tight, and began to cry on my shoulder. I looked around the frenzied kitchen. People from the Order scrambled around, attempting to organize themselves before their departure to the Department of Mysteries. I caught sight of a flash of jet black hair. I quickly released Nymphadora.

"SIRIUS!" I shouted, running over to grab his arm. "You can't go! You have to stay here!"

He looked frightened. "No, Remus. Harry needs me. I care greatly for him, Remus, and I need to protect him." He shrugged off my loose grip, and hurried from the kitchen.

Nymphadora grasped my shoulder. "Remus, we should leave now."

***

I had lost him. The last of my closest friends, and he was gone. My body felt heavy with sadness as I sat on the edge of the chair in St. Mungo's with the early morning light poking in through the window. I needed some time alone when we returned from the Department of Mysteries, and now I sat in the hospital watching my wife lay silently in the hospital bed with my son sleeping quietly in my arms. Tears began to stream down my face in the complete silence of the ward, and I couldn't erase the image of Sirius' fall from my troubled mind. I held Nymphadora's limp hand and smiled through my curtain of tears down at my beautiful son. As long as there is love, there is life.