I Have a Rendezvous with Death

"I Have a Rendezvous with Death"

by Paracelsus

Chapter II: Not Your Usual Girl Talk

Hermione's flat, Ginny decided as they Apparated in, matched her personality nicely. The walls were floor-to-ceiling bookcases, filled to overflowing with tomes. The furniture was elegant but comfortable. The place was tidy, organized, and friendly. She released Hermione's hand and took a couple of steps, turning in place and admiring the décor.

As soon as her hand was released, Hermione leaned against a table and massaged her brow. Ginny was immediately solicitous. "I'm sorry, Hermione, are you all right?"

"I'm fine," replied Hermione. "It's just that Apparating two people can be tiring."

"I could have Apparated here on my own. I didn't even know you could take someone with you when Apparating."

Hermione smiled. "Well, you don't Apparate out of your clothes, after all. And mothers can Apparate while carrying small children. You can Apparate things along with you - but when they're as big as another adult, it's tiring." She straightened and walked to the kitchen, took two wine glasses from a cupboard. "And no, you couldn't have Apparated here on your own. No one can, except me - and one other."

"Ah. Another of Harry's 'precautions'?"

"Yes, a precaution." Hermione seemed to debate with herself. "Ginny, you know you're one of my dearest friends, right? I'd love it f you could spend evenings with Ron, Harry and me over the summer, like we did tonight. But if you want to join us on a regular basis, we do need to take some... some precautions..."

"What's wrong, Hermione? I've already agreed to this, you know... you were at the restaurant..."

"Yes. But we hadn't told you what the... precautions would be. Ginny, I have to do something that you may find unforgivable. If you did, I wouldn't blame you. I can only hope you'll find it in your heart to pardon me."

Ginny was growing uneasy at the turn the conversation had taken. "I don't think you could do anything that I'd find impossible to forgive..."

Hermione sighed, and turned to face Ginny. Ginny suddenly noticed that Hermione had her wand out, and it was pointed straight at her.

"Imperio!" cried Hermione.

For a moment, Ginny stood staring blankly into space. Then her face broke into a large, fixed smile, like the painted smile of a marionette. She cocked her head perkily and started to sing in a baby-girl voice: "I'm a lit-tle tea-pot, short and stout..."

She put one hand to her waist, extended the other shoulder-high, as she continued: "Here is my han-dle, here is my BUGGER!!" The 'spout' hand was now displaying a very rude hand gesture, and the smile was noticeably absent: she was glaring at Hermione furiously.

"Let. Me. Go," she forced out.

Hermione twitched her wand, and Ginny immediately lowered her arms. Her fists were clenched in fury. "'Unforgivable?' I ought to have guessed. Do you always use Unforgivable Curses on your friends, Granger?" she spat.

"Only when they are my friends," Hermione whispered. "Please, let me explain..."

"Explain?! EXPLAIN?!! I trusted you, and then you do this... to me..." Ginny advanced toward Hermione, in a towering rage - figuratively and literally. Her fists shook as though she were fighting an impulse to strike Hermione. Hermione, for her part, had her head bowed meekly, penitently, accepting her friend's anger.

The thought came to both witches that these were far from typical postures for either of them. Ginny cooled, slightly but noticeably. Hermione raised her head and stood straighter.

Finally, Ginny turned away from Hermione and marched to one of the armchairs. She plopped into and continued to glare. "Where's that drink you promised me?" she asked coldly.

Hermione put away her wand and produced a bottle of sherry from the cupboard. She poured into the two wine glasses, and brought them out of the kitchen. She handed one to Ginny, and sipped from her own as she sat in the other armchair. She forced herself to look directly at Ginny.

"You remember being told about Voldemort's first rise to power? About how he used the Imperius Curse to control people? And how there was no way to tell who was being controlled?"

"Of course I remember," Ginny conceded. "Dad always said a lot of former Death Eaters claimed to be controlled. There's no way to tell if someone's under Imperius."

"Well, that turns out to be wrong. Harry found out by accident, our last year at Hogwarts. There is a way to tell if someone's under the Imperius Curse."

Ginny's eyes widened. Slowly, she nodded. "By seeing if they're susceptible to another Imperius Curse...?"

"Exactly. A witch or wizard under Imperius cannot be taken over by a different Imperius. The relative strengths of the two wizards casting the Imperius Curses are irrelevant - if the first Imperius can be successfully cast at all, it completely rejects any further Imperius that might be attempted." Hermione spoke in her usual academician's way, but her posture was still penitent, and her eyes implored Ginny's pardon.

"I understand." Ginny remained silent a moment longer, then said grudgingly, "And I do forgive you. You had to know about me. I'd been away for years, after all."

Hermione smiled in relief. "I am sorry. But you did break free from my control; that was impressive. And hey, at least it was me who tested you, and not Harry or Ron."

"Hmph. 'I'm a little teapot' was demeaning enough. I shudder to think what they might've come up with." Ginny sipped her sherry, regaining her composure. She'd been right to be angry with Hermione, but knowing her motive - and the history that had made the test necessary - she realized she couldn't stay angry. "So when does Harry regularly test you and Ron? After all, You-Know-Who could bring you under his control at any time..."

"Harry claims that the extended use of Imperius alters a person's behavior so radically, that it becomes apparent to all his close associates. That's why Mr. Crouch, the Triwizard judge, wasn't allowed to go to work after he'd been controlled for a while: his co-workers would have noticed."

"Percy certainly would've," Ginny agreed.

"Harry says, looking back, that even when Crouch was at Hogwarts the night the Goblet picked the champions, there were signs he was under Imperius - if anybody'd known him well enough to see them."

"Ah. So Harry could tell, without testing, if you or Ron were under Imperius?"

Hermione nodded. "And Harry, as we both know, has been able to beat the Imperius Curse for years. By now, he's practically invulnerable to it."

"And he's known about this test for, what, four years? Five? I would've expected it to be common knowledge by now..."

Hermione said nothing. Ginny grinned. "Ah, I see. If You-Know-Who doesn't know we know who's he's controlling, we have an advantage."

"You're too sharp for your own good, Ginny." Hermione grinned back. "Actually, I think the Auror Corps test their own agents this way now. But really, it's still one of the Unforgivable Curses. Most people would be reluctant to start using Imperius, even for a good cause."

Ginny relaxed back into her chair and sipped her drink. "Okay, that's one 'precaution' taken. I assume it was the worst?"

"Yes. The other is straightforward: stay at the Burrow. It's been made Unplottable, you know..."

"Ohhh yes, I do indeed know. That's why I had to arrive via Portkey yesterday. One can't Apparate to or from an Unplottable location."

"And your father's taken it off the Floo Network. So Death Eaters would be hard pressed to reach the Burrow by surprise. It's reasonably safe."

Ginny looked around at Hermione's flat with renewed interest. "Are you telling me this place has been made Unplottable? Is that why I wouldn't be able to Apparate here?"

"No," Hermione shook her head. "If it were Unplottable, I wouldn't be able to Apparate here either. No, the location of my home has been locked under a Fidelius Charm. Are you familiar with it?"

"Y-yesss, I think so. The knowledge to be kept secret is extracted from, um, call it the ether..."

"The Jungian collective unconscious."

"Whatever."

"And stored in a human soul, the Secret Keeper. Harry's parents used Fidelius twenty years ago to hide themselves. It would've worked, if they'd chosen the right Secret Keeper." Hermione waved her hand around the room. "Only I and my Secret Keeper know where I live. As long as we both remain silent, Voldemort himself could stand right outside my window and never find me."

"Wow." Ginny couldn't help glancing at the windows. She wasn't surprised to see the blinds down, the curtains drawn. No clues there, she thought.

"Needless to say, a Fidelius Charm was done for Ron's home, too. As it happens, we both have the same Secret Keeper." Hermione's innocent smile was a challenge.

Ginny barely hesitated before she said confidently, "Harry." She added, "It stands to reason. If You-Know-Who only wanted to find you so he could get to Harry, and he had to get to Harry in order to find you, then..."

"Clever Ginny... So if you decide you want to move out of the Burrow," resumed Hermione, "we need to cast a Fidelius Charm on your new home. I'll let you borrow my Secret Keeper - he seems to be reliable."

"Gosh, thanks. But I think I'll be in the Burrow for the foreseeable future." Ginny gazed at her friend. "Hermione - why didn't you become an Auror too? I'd bet you know as many charms and curses - and counter-curses - as Harry does. You're smart, you're brave, resourceful..."

"Please, Gin. You're making me sound like a Girl Scout." Hermione chewed her lip as she considered Ginny's question. "It's true I know a lot of spells by heart. And I like to think I'm brave (thanks for the compliment, by the way)... I've certainly faced my share of dangers. But I work best when I have time to think, to prepare... look things up, plan what I'm going to do. When I have to think on my feet I... I tend to freeze." She smiled ruefully. "Despite knowing all the spells to use, I didn't turn out to be much good at dueling. I forgot that Devil's Snare is afraid of fire... I walked right into Malfoy's Densaugeo curse... No, I wouldn't have made a good Auror. My talents are better employed right where I am."

"If you say so, I won't argue. But I will point out that you're basing your opinion on things that happened years ago." Ginny finished her sherry. "I think you should consider re-applying for Auror training. From what I hear, they need recruits - and I think you'd be good at it." Ginny changed the subject immediately, before Hermione had a chance to raise objections. "Anything else? I suppose I should start compiling a list of places to eat, in case I ever win the coin toss."

"They don't all need to be restaurants. One time, Ron took us on a picnic. If it's a weeknight, though, dining out is probably best... less conspicuous, if nothing else. And we prefer Muggle restaurants... wizard establishments are more likely to be frequented by Voldemort's agents. But these are only guidelines. The important thing is that the three of us - the four of us, now - all get to see one another. And that is important."

"Well," said Ginny casually, "we don't have to see each other all at once. I mean, you could still see Ron without needing all this security."

"I could," Hermione agreed.

"But you haven't?"

"Not for a long, long while." Hermione sighed. "We never actually decided to split up, you know. We just... stopped dating. We're still friends, and I love your brother, Ginny, but..."

"But not that way. Hermione, I understand, truly."

"Honestly, he could drive a saint to distraction! And I... I got tired of being the one who initiated everything." She was no longer speaking to Ginny, but seemed to be addressing her sherry glass. "But I find I can't just walk away from him. Isn't that strange? It's as though he were a part of me ... He is still my friend - just as I'm his - and Friends Don't Let Friends Fight Alone... no matter what the battle may be."

"And you're not seeing anybody else?"

"I'm not. I can't speak for Ron."

Ginny considered. "I think he'd have told me if he were dating someone new." She paused. Hermione's not dating anybody? I don't think she's that fixated on her books. I wonder if she'd date the right somebody... "What about Harry?"

Hermione shook her head at her glass. "We practically had to point a wand at Harry's head to get him out to dinner with us. What makes you think he'd actually date someone? He'd never put them at such a risk."

"The girl would have to be extraordinarily protected," suggested Ginny.

Hermione lifted her gaze from her glass to regard her friend. "The only two ladies who're sufficiently protected," she pointed out with a hint of a smile, "are both in this room."

"I was speaking hypothetically," Ginny said primly.

"Well, then, Harry would need to hypothetically show some interest - that way - in any hypothetical witch, before we could hypothetically worry about protecting her." She gave Ginny a half-smile. "It's not just that he wants to keep innocents from harm, although Merlin knows that'd be enough. He honestly doesn't believe any woman could find him attractive."

Ginny stared. "Honestly!?"

"Mm-hmm. I think it has something to do with growing up always hearing how worthless he was. Or maybe it was coming to Hogwarts, and being praised for something he doesn't remember - something he didn't actually do. Or maybe both."

"Yeah. Hmph, and all this time I thought he was simply modest." Ginny shook her head, thinking back. "I recall that first Yule ball, my third year. Some girls had asked him to the ball, remember? And he hated it. He was certain they weren't asking Harry - they were asking The Boy Who Lived."

"He doesn't talk about it a lot - not to me, anyway - but I feel sure he still gets offers like that, occasionally. He always declines, of course... I swear he'd spend his entire life either shut up at home or fighting as an Auror, if he had his way..."

"You sound like you want him to go out with one of those floozies."

"No!" exclaimed Hermione with more force than necessary. "I mean... that is..."

She stood up abruptly, went to the kitchen, and returned with the sherry bottle. Ginny raised her glass, and Hermione poured for them both. She reseated herself. "I don't necessarily want him to go out with a floozy, as you put it," she said quietly. "I would like to see him spend a little more time enjoying himself. Not spending every waking moment trying to defeat Voldemort."

"Well, but," said Ginny after a moment, "we do need to defeat Voldemort. Rather desperately, at this point. The attacks haven't stopped for seven years. They're no longer confined to England. He hasn't tried an armed assault since Hogsmeade, but there's still the 'death of a thousand cuts.' Madame Maxime doesn't know how much longer we can maintain a cohesive society - she gives us less than five years."

"I feel quite sure Harry knows all that. And that he feels personally responsible for stopping Voldemort, regardless of the cost to himself. He just doesn't seem to realize how high that cost really is. His health, his friends, his life... I want him to realize he has a life after Voldemort."

"Ah. And so you convince him to dine out with his closest friends, to remind him of his life outside the fight against the Dark Lord. And you'd feel relieved if his thoughts extended so far outside that fight as to include a night on the town with a floozy. Is that, in essence, your position, Miss Granger?"

"Close enough, Miss Weasley," laughed Hermione. "Close enough."

Ginny laughed with her, and the two witches sipped their wine in silence for a moment. Then Ginny said, "So which of us should ask him?"

Hermione looked apprehensive. "Ask him?"

"Ask him out on a date. As you say, we're the only two ladies whose safety he wouldn't have to worry about. And at least we're not floozies." Ginny smiled. "Although Fleur did show me some interesting fashion tips..."

"Whatever happened to 'hypothetically'?"

"I have the advantage of having just come home after a long stay abroad, so I'd seem fresh and new," Ginny pressed on, as though determined to get the words out before her nerve failed. "On the other hand, he may still see me as Ron's kid sister with a crush. You could date him without upsetting his world-view - he's grown used to dining with you, it wouldn't be that much of a leap for him - but he may prefer you as a female friend than as a girlfriend. Either way..."

"Either way," Hermione interrupted firmly, "Harry would decline the invitation. I'm telling you, the man's a monk. He's not dating anyone until Voldemort's defeated."

"You're sure?"

"Feel free to ask him." Trust me, Hermione added silently, he won't see you as Ron's kid sister with a crush.

"Uh, noooo, I don't think so." Let's not push this, thought Ginny.

"Me neither," Hermione grinned.

"So." Ginny paused. "So what do we do?"

"We go out to dinner with Harry and Ron at irregular intervals, starting next Sunday. We support our best friend as he tries his damnedest to save all our lives. We keep him from going crazy - we give help when he asks for it." Hermione looked Ginny in the eye. "And we stop trying to fix him up with a date. With anyone. He's a grown man: if he decides he wants a date, he knows how to ask."

"Fair enough," Ginny nodded. "We only worry because we love him," she added lightly.

Hermione didn't reply directly. She stood and extended her hand to Ginny. "C'mon. I'll Apparate you back to the restaurant," she said. "Or wherever you need to be so you can Portkey back to the Burrow."

"Hermione? Do you love him?" Ginny blurted as she stood. She watched Hermione's face grow distant, and thought, Oh hell, I've pushed too hard...

"If loving someone means I'd give my life to save theirs," said Hermione after a moment, "then yes, I do love him. And by that measure, he loves me - and you, and Ron."

"By that measure," Ginny pointed out, "Harry loves people he's never met. Please, Hermione, this is me. We've known each other since we were kids. You can't tell me your feelings are a 'Platonic ideal' sort of love. How would you feel if Harry died tomorrow?"

Hermione shuddered. "If Harry died tomorrow," she said bleakly, "I'd want to die too." She was visibly at a loss for words, a rarity for Hermione. "It's not just that I'd miss him terribly," she finally said. "It would be more like amputating my right arm... Harry's a very real part of me - in some ways, the best part."

"I don't understand. You said Ron was part of you too."

"Well, he is, but in a different way. And I feel sure," said Hermione with a sudden smile, "that I'm just as much a part of them. Not that they'd ever admit it... they are men, after all."

"The Trio," said Ginny, returning her smile. But Hermione reached up and took her by the shoulders.

"You're part of us, too, girl. Everything I just said applies to you now." Her eyes danced merrily. "I know that makes us a Trio of four people, but nobody would take 'the Quartet' seriously."

Ginny burst out laughing, and she hugged Hermione tightly. "Thanks, sis."

They embraced each other a moment longer, then separated and joined hands preparatory to Apparating away. Ginny said, just before they left the flat, "So you do love Harry."

"Yes," said Hermione. "But as with Ron: I don't love him that way."

Not yet, thought Ginny.

"You know what I'm talking about, Gin. You love Harry too, don't deny it. You've loved him for years."

"Pfft. That old crush has long since worn off," said Ginny. "Yes, I love him, by your standards. But, if you see the distinction, I'm not in love with him."

Not yet, thought Hermione.