Closure

Closure

Harry was once again in the dismal, soulless room he was forced to inhabit when he was at the Dursley's during the summer holidays. It had been there awaiting his return from the station, unchanged, mockingly reminding him of the time he had spent blissfully unaware of the contempt the wizarding world held him in. Unaware of what was about to occur and how much his life was to change.

A time when the only things he had to worry about were: "Why had Voldemort not acted, and why his friends were being so closed mouthed with him?" A time when he had been ignorant of what was about to occur...a time when he still had Sirius!

The silence he had once craved and invited at the Dursley's now taunted and engulfed him. It was as if life was trying to acclimatize him and prepare him for the reality of an existence without his godfather. For it seemed that life was a much colder and uncaring place, all the vibrancy, fun and comfort in life seemed to have died with Sirius.

Sirius had been his anchor in a world that radiated cruelty and despair, had been the shred of love and stability that was absent in his life...a part of his parents that still survived, that had weathered the storm that was Voldemort.

But just as his parents had been stolen from him...so had Sirius.

Harry's world now comprised of pain, grief and a guilt that gnawed at his very being. It had been his fault of course, his fault that Sirius was dead, no one else's despite his attempts at laying all the blame at Snape's door it all came back to him.

He had as good as killed his godfather with his stupidity and stubbornness. In fact it was a miracle nobody else had perished because of him. He could have just as easily lost Hermione or Ron...even Neville, poor brave but misguided Neville. How would he ever been able to look Neville's grandmother in the eye again knowing it was his fault that she had lost another member of her family?

He found himself wondering whether this was all that was left in life for him: loneliness, bone crushing sadness, and guilt that plaugued his every waking moment.

Darkness crept into the room from the world outside. Even the sky seemed to be in mourning for Sirius as there was no moonlight or stars twinkling in the velvet sky...only clouds that overshadowed Privet Drive.

Just as he was at his lowest moment what ever deity that protected and guided him decided to intervene.

Harry looked up at the sound of a light tapping on the window. Perched on the ledge was a jet black screech owl its wide yellow eyes glaring balefully into the room.

Rising to his feet Harry crossed to the window and opened it so that the owl could gain access to the room.

Fluttering past his head it entered the room, circled once and then dropped a package it was carrying in its clawed feet onto the mattress. Turning in a small arc it headed back towards the window and flew straight out into the night, the darkness quickly swallowing up its form.

Frowning, Harry scoped up the package and proceeded to open it. Out fell a cream-coloured piece of parchment written on which was the neat, legible script that Harry immediately identified as belonging to Remus Lupin.

Dear Harry,

I do not pretend to know how you must be feeling at this moment, although I am also burdened by an overwhelming sense of grief at Sirius' loss. But know this, I will always be here for you whenever you need to talk, and I will always listen to you. Pain such as you are experiencing must not be kept bottled up and must be shared. Never turn your back on your friends, they understand more than you realise and can be a great comfort in such times.

I was going through some of Sirius' things today and came across one special item that I know he treasured and was planning on giving to you. I managed to stop Kreacher from disposing of it out of spite and hatred.

It is contained within this package, shrunken so that the owl would find it easier to carry. Hopefully it will bring you a closure of sorts.

Please remember Harry, that Sirius loved you greatly and would not want you to spend all of your days grieving for him. He would want you to continue living life in the best way possible, filled with joy and happiness.

Please keep in touch.

Your loving friend,

Remus Lupin.

Tipping the package gently, Harry watched as a small object fell out onto the mattress. Whispering a quick enlargement spell he watched it instantaneously grow in size.

It was a large, black, leather bound book stamped with fading silver writing that read "Property of Sirius Black."

Harry swallowed and opened the book at the front page. Written there in Sirius' small, untidy writing were the words:

"Marauding with the Marauders."

A diary of the Hogwarts years by S.B (Padfoot).

With entries by J.P, R.L and P.P

A.K.A Prongs, Moony and Wormtail.

Harry's mouth hung open in amazement. He had never thought Sirius to be the type to keep a diary. Still, his godfather had been quite sentimental. He loved to talk about the marauders and their adventures. In fact it had hurt Harry to be constantly compared to his father.

Turning the pages quickly, Harry found himself flicking through each entry, skim reading for entries that caught his interest. His eyes stopped on one day in particular.

Sat our OWLs today, I think it went okay. Moony was jammy, one of the questions was to do with distinguishing werewolves. I would be worried if he couldn't answer that question.

Anyway enough about exams!

Had great fun torturing that greasy, conceited, scum Snape! Prongs tried to improve his breath by washing his mouth out with soap, although I think it would have been put to better use on Snivellus' hair - the slime ball! That Evans girl came over and started to interfere, I don't now why anyone would bother! We should get an award for services to the school for trying to improve health and safety through pest control! Anyway she went off in a huff leaving us alone to continue. So to make sure the job got done right, and makes sure that Snapey was squeaky clean we stripped him of one item of clothing at a time and dumped him in the lake - was really quite amusing! Though I very much doubt the lake will ever be the same again! It might take a while to decontaminate, with all that grease!

That was about it for today. Played some Quidditch later on in the afternoon, next match soon, Slytherin vs. Gryffindor. I am not worried though, we are sure to win with James on the team!

Harry winced at this entry and could not help but feel sympathy for Snape. He seriously doubted that he would ever be able to forgive this side of his father's and godfather's past. He quickly turned the page to try and forget what he had just read.

He spent the rest of the night reading through the diary. Each page was peppered with mischief making, Filch dodging and Snape tormenting but towards the end there were entries about his mother and father who had started dating in their seventh year.

Finally, he reached would should be the last entry, as it was about their graduation. His mother and father had both been Valedictorians with his mother receiving awards in Charms, Potions and Transfiguration and his father in Defence against the Dark Arts and Herbology.

He was surprised, however, when he turned the page to find yet another entry.

Epilogue: After Graduation

I never thought I would miss Hogwarts as much as I do. I miss Quidditch, marauder meetings, and all our crazy antics. Hell! I am even starting to miss classes - who would have thought it! But the other marauders have kept me occupied.

James and Lily have announced their engagement and I have been asked to be the best man. I accepted of course! Much to Moony's chagrin although he keeps denying it!

I look forward to a future with such good friends. At the risk of sounding like some soppy Muggle Hallmark card: I cannot imagine life without them. I can see us all in years to come going to dinner at each others houses, trading stories over the table. And then after the meal was finished we would all sit around the fire with the children playing on the rug (Moony, Wormtail and I will have to be married off though) and we will tell tales of the old marauder days.

I have finally done it! I have become all sugary and sentimental! Well before my time to, just as well I am alone as I write this - James would have had me rushed to Saint Mungo's for a check up!

And so I end my tale with the anticipation of the years to come.

But with friends like Lily, James, Remus and Peter...how could they possibly be dull?

Sirius Black.

Harry felt tears running down his face. The last entry had really got to him, they were so full of life and expectation, unaware of what lay just over the horizon.

How could they know what lay ahead for them all?

In a small number of years one would turn traitor, two would die at Voldemort's hand and one would be imprisoned for thirteen years to finally escape and die two years later.

A sob escaped his body and he finally let himself do what he had denyed himself at Hogwarts. He lay down on the bed and sobbed into the pillows until he thought he would die from grief, if such a thing is possible.

Slowly, but surely his sobs ceased. He sat up in bed and reached for the remainder of the packaging to throw it away but as he did so a piece of parchment fell out.

It was again written in Remus's handwriting.

No longer mourn for me when I am dead

Than you shall hear the surly sullen bell

Give warning to the world that I am fled

From this vile world with vilest worms to dwell.

Nay, if you read this line, remember not

The hand that writ it; for I love you so

That I in your sweet thoughts would be forgot

If thinking on me then should make you woe.

O, if, I say, you look upon this verse

When I perhaps compounded am with clay,

Do not so much as my poor name rehearse,

But let your love even with my life decay,

Lest the wise world should look into your moan

And mock you with me after I am gone.

William Shakespeare.

Sonnet 71.

Below this was written: "Think on it. It is what he would have wanted. The past is the past the present is for living and the future still to be written."

Remus Lupin.

Harry sat for along while deep in thought. Remus had been right, pain was to be faced up to for in reading the diary and the sonnet he had in some way finally reached a closure of sorts. He would live for the moment. For life must go on but he would ever look forward to the day he would see his godfather again.

The End.