The Last and The First

The Last and The First

Chapter One

21^st July 2007

Sirius rolled over in the large bed, blearily searching for the clock. 4:15 am! What the hell had woken him up? The large shape in the bed beside him was sound asleep, breathing deeply. 'Jammy git!' thought Sirius, 'He'd sleep through a thunderstorm!'

Suddenly, the noise began again. A muffled scream, coming from Harry's room.

"He's having the nightmares again," Sirius mumbled, a tone of concern evident in his voice. "I wonder if I should go and..."

"Huh? Wha? Wheresa pitch?" a very confused and sleepy voice exclaimed, somewhat smothered by the duvet. Sirius smiled as the lump beside him finally moved.

"I see you're awake, Mooney," he said, his smile completely audible.

"Why did you wake me up Sirius, it's only, good Merlin Sirius, it's just after four in the morning!" Remus exclaimed.

"Shush! Harry's having the nightmares again," Sirius whispered.

"Has he called out for Ginny yet? Should we go into him?" Remus' voice was full of the same concern which Sirius had spoken with. His feelings for Harry's wellbeing equalled those of Harry's godfather.

"No, I think he's quieting down. If he starts up again, I'll go in and wake him." They lay together in silence for a few minutes, both thinking about previous nights, when Harry's nightmares had become a kind of delirium from which he had to be forcibly raised.

"I can't believe she's dead Remus. I, well, I guess I hoped after Harry killed Voldemort, that his supporters would fall apart. Why would they wait two years and then kill her? I know, I know, I'm being terribly naïve, but..."

&lquo;No, I was hoping that too. Everyone was." They both lapsed into silence, thinking about Harry.

He had been so happy with Ginny; they had gotten together at the end of Harry's sixth year. Everyone took it surprisingly well. Ron and Hermione were really happy, as it took some of the watchful eyes from their burgeoning romance (although Ron did threaten to break both of Harry's legs and his Firebolt if Harry hurt Ginny in any way). The Weasleys were amazed, but really supportive of the couple. Sirius and Remus had been ecstatic. For them anyone that made Harry happy was a good thing, and it was Ginny, who, after her third year, was one of the few students of Hogwarts (along with Fred and George) that could match the Marauders in pranks and fun, that Harry had let into his heart.

Ginny had been a big help to Harry after his graduation from Hogwarts, the night he had actually killed Voldemort. It had been a close thing, and Harry almost hadn't survived first his injuries, and then his guilt over the other deaths which should never have happened. After Ginny graduated, she moved into 12 Grimmauld Place with Harry, where he had been living since the summer of his fifth year. The war, or the main battle, was over, and as the Ministry was now openly fighting Voldemort's supporters, the house was no longer headquarters for the Order of the Phoenix.

For one wonderful year, everything was amazing. Ginny was working for her twin brothers part-time as a "maginnovator" at Weasleys Wizarding Wheezes in Diagon Alley, only 15 minutes from Grimmauld Place. She spent the rest of her time sketching, painting and sculpting anything she could. The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black had never looked so good, as she had used her artistic eye to redecorate the whole house, and her creations (which visitors often asked about buying) filled every room.

Harry, after long consideration and hard work, actually managed to be on of the first people to be selected for Auror training in five years (having just got the marks he needed in his Potions NEWT), along with, surprisingly enough, Draco Malfoy. They had put their enmity aside in Harry's seventh year, and through the course of the training became friends. Of course, it helped that Draco had captured his father after Lucius' much publicised escape from Azkaban (the Dementors, as Dumbledore predicted, did leave Azkaban, leaving the prisoners go free), and turned him into the Ministry to be taken to more secure surroundings.

After Sirius had been cleared of all charges in Harry's sixth year at Hogwarts, he and Remus were able to have a somewhat more normal relationship. Remus was asked to teach Defence Against the Dark Arts at Hogwarts again, which he accepted, and after McGonagall was killed during the war, Sirius was offered the post of Transfiguration professor. After many lectures from Remus about the fact that he could no longer break rules, but must enforce them, and Dumbledore's assurance that he could still actively contribute to the Order, he accepted.

Amazingly enough, Sirius was very like McGonagall in his attitude to teaching - strict but fair. He was well respected, both for this and the fact that he was a great teacher (and it didn't hurt that, despite the haunted look which never really left him, he was quite good-looking, earning him fans all over the houses).

Although Remus and Sirius lived at Hogwarts for the school months, they all lived quite happily in Sirius' house - which was big enough to fit an army (and it had on several occasions) - during the holidays. This worked out very well for a couple of years, and then the didn't-want-to-imaginable happened.

"I feel so responsible Remus." Sirius lay beside Remus, his hands playing with the edge of the duvet. "I knew something was wrong when the owl came back injured. I could have been there in a few moments. But I waited for the Order."

"Just as you were told to. What if it had of been a trap? You both would have been killed! And because you waited the rest of the Death Eaters were captured red-handed. Even the Ministry couldn't mess up the case against them." Remus was sad at the fact that it had taken Ginny Weasley's death to stop the Death Eaters, but he was not going to let Sirius beat himself up over it. It was not Sirius' fault, but he had a guilt complex a mile long.

Remus once again thanked his lucky stars that Sirius had followed orders. He had a knack for getting involved in sticky situations whether or not he was ordered to, which had nearly lost him his life in Harry's fifth year. His cousin, Bellatrix Lestrange had hit him with an almost-fatal curse, and he had come within inches of falling through The Veil, until, luckily, Dumbledore had enough sense to levitate him away. Harry went haring off after Bellatrix, thinking his godfather was, as he appeared to be, dead. Thank Merlin Mad-Eye Moody knew the curse that Bellatrix had used, and the counter curse, or Sirius would not be here today.

"I'm not sure if that helps Harry. To him, the first person he ever loved is dead, along with a long list of others he cared about."

"Sirius, do you ever think? If the both of you had been killed, Harry wouldn't be the only one losing sleep. We've all lost a lot of important people, and, no, Ginny shouldn't have been one of them, but at least you're not! If Harry lost you, he wouldn't cope, and I don't think he'd be able to rely on me for much if you died." Remus stopped, unsure if he could keep his emotions in check. They had been together for six years, and he loved Sirius more than he had anyone before. If he were to lose him...

"I'm sorry Remus. I know all that, but it doesn't help when I hear my godchild scream in his sleep because of the orders I followed."

Again, they lay there, each thinking about what had just been said, each needing both to comfort and be comforted. Sirius turned to Remus and kissed him softly on the lips.

'Every time he does that I go weak at the knees,' thought Remus 'It's like every part of me is tingling.' Remus was kissing back, one hand running down Sirius' back, the other pulling gently on the hair at the nape of his neck.

'Oh!' thought Sirius, 'how does he know to do that?' It was amazing, like every nerve in his body stood to attention. 'Mmmm, this reminds me of some...'

Suddenly Sirius pulled back, an odd look on his face. Remus found himself staring into Sirius' eyes, which were, unusually, totally unguarded. It made him look about 15 again.

"What's wrong?" Remus probed gently. Sirius seemed to push a thought away.

"Nothing." He smiled, not very convincingly. "I was just thinking about the first time we did that." Remus' face broke into a very large, very silly smile.

"To tell you the truth, I was a bit surprised. It's not every day your best friend comes into your home - well, cave - tells you that the Order of the Phoenix has restarted, all about the Triwizard competition, and that Harry still had to go back to his Aunts house, until I was in such a state that I didn't know my tail from my arm, and then proceeded to tell me that he rather likes me, in fact he thinks, no, he knows he loves me. The next thing I knew, which didn't seem to be a lot, we were involved in a rather hungry embrace," he paused, looking at the smirk on Sirius' face, "which, if I recall correctly, went something like this."

With that, Remus leaned over again, and they proceeded to do something which even Snape would blush at.

**********

The next morning they went downstairs for breakfast. Usually one or the other was rushing off, but not much was going on with the Order, and they had nothing to do in town. Due to their rather sleepless night, it was almost 10:30 before they entered the kitchen, and Harry was already there. He wasn't what you'd call well rested, but he looked a lot better than he had done since Ginny's death.

"Morning! I was just about to leave, exams finish today." Harry's final Auror exams had been going on for the last two weeks.

"I thought Draco was coming over early?" Sirius ventured, still not quite awake. Draco lived not to far from Grimmauld Place, and often popped in before their training.

"I'm here," came a voice to their left. "Harry, I'll see you at the exam, I have to go. Good luck," he said, taking his small bag from the table, and nodded at the two rather bleary-eyed men. "Sirius, Remus." With that, he Disapparated.

Remus sat at the table as Sirius conjured two steaming cups of coffee. Harry seemed to be tying his shoes, but it was obvious to both of them that he wanted to talk about something. They knew from their experience of the Potter male that he would fidget and bluster about silly things to distract them (or himself) from something important or from an issue that he didn't really want to discuss. It always amazed Remus that, physical similarities aside, James and Harry were so alike. Finally, Harry looked up from his shoes, signalling that he was ready to say what he had to.

"Ron and Hermione are meeting me after the exam, and we're going to the Burrow to see the Weasleys." The words were flowing so fast it was hard to tell whether he would finish first, or if he would actually turn purple from lack of oxygen. "I haven't seen them in ages, so I thought now's as good a time as any. We'll be late back, or I might stay the night, I'll see when I get there." Finally, he was able to breath.

"Ok Harry," Remus said dubiously, "are you sure you're up for this?" Harry hadn't seen any of the Weasleys since Ginny's funeral, when, amazingly enough, he wasn't in his best ever state-of-mind.

"No, I'm not sure, but....it's been almost nine months, and I haven't spoken to any of them really except Ron and Hermione. I need to talk to them, I think?" Harry looked to Sirius and Remus very much like the scared and confused eleven-year-old that Hagrid had once described to them.

"Well, owl us if you are staying on, ok? Just to let us know. I mean, this house is as much yours as it is mine, you don't have to ask for my approval," Sirius replied in his usual jovial manner, but Remus saw the concern behind the words.

"Sure Sirius. I have to go, or I'll be late. Oh, and one more thing?" Harry was looking at the both of them with a bit of a cheeky grin on his face.

"Uh, yes Harry, what is it?" asked Remus, wondering at the grin. It had been weeks since Harry had smiled, let alone grinned like that.

"Well, maybe you should invest in some soundproofing charms. I like my sleep at 4:45 in the morning!" He flashed his grin at both of them, the beginnings of a blush creeping under Remus' collar, and Sirius spluttering his coffee, and Disapparated.

"The cheeky little git!" Sirius exclaimed, "And him after waking us in the first place!"

"At least it seems as if Harry is finally breaking through. He hasn't teased us like that in, oh, months!" Remus managed to choke out in between laughs.

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