Bloody Torchwood

"Mam wants us back by five," Remus said and licked his ice cream before it could drip onto his fingers. "My aunt Lyneth is coming for dinner."

Sirius groaned and stopped by a bin. "Can't we say we're ill?"

Remus sighed. "No. Mam wants you on your best behaviour this time."

"So I said your auntie had a nice moustache." Sirius shrugged. "What's the big deal? You'd think she'd shave it once in a while."

Remus rolled his eyes. "Because that wasn't very polite, Padfoot."

"Well, it's true. And she started it," Sirius grumbled, eyes growing wide as a bright white light took him by surprise.

"I don't care who started it," Remus called back, licking his ice cream cone. "She's still my aunt--she doesn't care about my problem and I want you to be nice. All right?"

He stopped when Sirius didn't answer.

"Sirius?"

He was no longer behind Remus when he turned around, nothing but his half-eaten ice cream and the shopping bags he'd been carrying strewn on the ground.

"Not again. Real mature, Padfoot!" Remus called and, making sure no Muggles were around, muttered, "Accio Sirius!"

When Sirius didn't come shooting out of the bushes or from behind the nearest bin, Remus started to panic.

***

"Negative Rift activity in Bute Park," Ianto said, leaning into Jack as he wrapped his arms around him from behind. "And just when the Rift was starting to calm down."

Jack sighed and kissed Ianto's neck.

"I think it's trying to spite us," the captain said and laughed when Ianto rolled his eyes. "First those Hoix at three yesterday morning, now this. I do like to sleep sometimes."

"We should probably go check it out," the Welshman said, pulling away from Jack.

Jack stuck his bottom lip out in a mock pout. He kissed Ianto's neck again, grinning as the man shivered. "Can't we finish here first?"

"Rift now, sex later," Ianto said. "They may need medical attention. I'll get the kit, you call Helen. Let her know we might be bringing someone in."

"All right then," Jack said dejectedly, pecking Ianto on the cheek before moving towards his office.

"I'll meet you at the SUV," Ianto called with a chuckle.

"I can think of better things to do in it," Jack shouted back, grabbing his greatcoat from his office.

"I bet you can," Ianto muttered with a smile and made his way to the autopsy bay.

He watched Jack pull his mobile out of his coat before he disappeared into the pit, trying to ignore the green apron folded on the table and the dark spot on the floor he couldn't seem to scrub away as he gathered some small things for the SUV's first aid kit.

He hoped it wasn't going to be a long night. A quiet night in with Jack was much more appealing than a trip to Flat Holm.

***

The first thing Sirius noticed when he came to was that it was dark out. And raining.

"Bloody Cardiff," he said, clutching his head as he sat up.

"I know the feeling," an American voice said from somewhere off to his right.

He went for his wand and stood quickly, regretting it as his head swam. His legs felt like jelly. Brilliant.

"Who are you?" he croaked, squinting at the two men in front of him in the pale light of a full moon. A full moon he knew was still two weeks off. "And what the fuck is going on here?"

He raised his wand and watched as the men shared a quick look, their right hands going to something on their belts.

"I'm Captain Jack Harkness," the American said, "and this is Ianto Jones. We're here to help you."

Something seemed odd about Harkness--he recognised that coat from Muggle Studies. "Where's Remus? Why do I need your help?"

"Who's Remus?" the other man--Ianto? Odd name, Sirius thought, but, really, who was he to complain?-- asked. His accent was thicker than Remus's and Sirius felt his heart beat a little fast.

"My boy--" he paused for a moment and gripped his wand a little tighter. "My friend. I was with him. Where is he? What have you lot done with him?"

"When?" Harkness asked, stepping closer.

Sirius pointed his wand at him. "Just now. Where is he? What's going on?"

"What year? I need to know what year."

Sirius saw the other man pull something shiny and metal from his belt. He swung his wand back towards him and caught a metallic glint in the moonlight as Harkness pulled his own gun and trained it on Sirius.

Damn. "This year."

"Which is?"

Sirius gaped at him. "1979!"

Harkness's eyes widened and he shot another look at Jones. Sirius caught the confused look that drifted across his face and his hands started to shake. Something strange was going on....

"You're going to have to come with us." The American took another step closer. "We're not going to hurt you. We just want to make sure you're all right."

"Tell me what you've done with Remus first," Sirius said, voice cracking.

"No doubt he's safe back in 1979."

Sirius let his wand fall a fraction of a centimetre. What the hell.... "What do you mean 'back in 1979'? I just saw him!"

"There's a Rift in space and time running straight through Cardiff," the American said. "It brought you here."

Sirius vaguely wondered why he wasn't as surprised as he should be by that. Only in bloody Cardiff....

"Where's--when's here?" he asked, the blood roaring in his ears threatening to deafen him.

"Cardiff. 2008," Harkness said matter-of-factly.

"How is that possible?" he said and let his wand fall to his side. No point in resisting if this was some silly dream. Or if he was going mad. And he really didn't want to get shot--it always looked so painful in those Muggle films.

"It's...complicated," Jones said and Sirius shot him a glare. "If you'll come with us we can explain it to you. Maybe help you locate Remus if you'd like."

Sirius studied him; his hair was sticking to his forehead and he looked like he wanted nothing more than to get out of the rain.

"Why should I trust you?" Sirius asked sceptically as they lowered their guns.

"We can help you get home," Harkness said. Something in his voice made Sirius doubt that he was telling the truth, but if he really was in the future, maybe they could tell him what happened to Voldemort and the Order. If they won or what he could change if they hadn't when--if--he got back.

"Fine," he said and looked between them. "Just answer me one thing."

"Sure," the American said and smiled tightly. Sirius met his eyes and tried to keep from shivering as eyes too old for such a young face shone like ice in the moonlight.

"Who are you?"

Harkness grinned--a real one this time that made Sirius nervous with its intensity--and looked at Jones, who returned his smile as he holstered his gun. Turning to Sirius, they said, in unison, "Torchwood."