Up the Creek

Hole in the head

Late at night when I'm feeling blue

I'd sell my ass before I think of you

Seven hours since you closed the door

Started a diet, got a manicure

Erased your number from my telephone

And if you call me I won't be at home

My sister gave me a telephone once, stupid thing it is. It never does anything. As if they know my number. It's just a Muggle toy, I suppose. And if I knew how to work it, I would certainly not put his number in it. What if my husband found out?

I've started a new diet and a manicure always comes in easy when you want to look your best. Too bad my husband is imprisoned right now. I can always get my son to get me whatever I want I suppose. And well Bella, my darling sister Bella, could come for tea, I suppose.

But I wouldn't tell her of what happened all those years ago before I met my husband. I was in Paris, doing some gig as a model. Then this guy walks towards me. Wrapping me in all his lies, of course. How should I know he was with that pushy reporter. That reporter was the ugliest woman alive. I wish I never have to see her again.

Won't you miss me like a hole in the head

Because I do boy,

And it's cool boy

Bet you never thought I'd get out of bed

Because of you boy

Such a fool boy

Ok, so I went with him. There is nothing wrong with a good one night stand. I've had many. Not many could resist me, back in those days. I was young, beautiful and pure-blooded. What more could anyone ask for?

I went with him to this obviously cheap hotel. Couldn't he afford something more stylish? His lovemaking was appalling. I still get the shivers when I think about it. How could I ever let that man touch me like that! It must have been temporarily insane. It must have been the Firewhiskey...

The next morning he just left me there. With the bill for Merlin's sake. Well Merlin is nor really my rolemodel, but it's just a saying... I can't help it what those abominable half-bloods and Mudbloods make up, can I?

So I paid, and went back home.

A brand new day has just begun

Just because you made me go "ooh"

Doesn't mean I'll put up with you

Don't you dare come back

Can't you see I won't take that?

I ain't crying over you

Better fill your head up like I told you

I met my husband a few years later. We got married and what do you now. In my little boy's second year, the stupid git becomes his Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. I said to my husband, he was a School Governor at the time, that he ought to be suspended or worse... But he thought it wise to continue. It was a good of trying to overthrow Dumbledore. Unfortunately it didn't work.

And the stupid broad... well I see her more than I wish too. It's always nice to have someone near the press that is an unregistered animagus. Luckily she lost her memory when my Draco was in his second year. She must have been spying on the git when he lost his memory. Good for them. It is probably the best thing that ever happened to the both of them.

I am for now perfectly happy with my husband. He is imprisoned. I could care less about him, but then again... he has been good for me. But I will never tell him or anyone else that my son almost had Gilderoy Lockhart as his father...