A War of Nerves

CHAPTER 20: The Last Supper

It would have been a happy occasion were it not for the shadow of doom that shaded the group of warriors. So many people, so many powerful people in once place was almost unheard of. But power and magic suffocated the people present. Fear pumped their blood and the promise of adrenaline over the horizon made them edgy and easily surprised. There were only two calm people in the room. Albus Dumbledore and Alastor Moody. The two war-wizened veterans took their dinner with the rest of the warriors and cast the only shadow of tranquility over the crowd.

Lily did her best to follow in suit. All the people, all the fear. It was so contagious Lily almost wanted to escape it. But she wouldn't. She would stay with the rest of the warriors trying to radiate as much calmness as Dumbledore and Moody. She had actually been anxious to meet Moody. He was dead in her world. He had died trying to protect her father from Voldemort. He had died for such a noble cause he was given a memorial one of the only three free countries in the world; the Unites States, Japan, and Peru. She had seen the monument herself many times in the halls of Salem's. It was a huge statue with a quote she would always remember, "CONSTANT VIGILANCE!"

It was something she herself practiced, something she valued. Never having known the man, she only had to go off of what her aunt told her. Her aunt called him "the greatest auror of his generation save Dumbledore himself and the greatest man she'd ever met." As Lily looked at him, she saw the same thing her aunt did and remembered the quote, "CONSTATN VIGILANCE!" It would be a long night, a long, cold, lonely night.

"Do you see that!?! Lily! She can't talk to him, I'll wring her neck!" Morgan hissed.

Lily sat down her glass of pumpkin juice and said, "Raja, you were interrupting my moment of nostalgia. Who can't talk to whom?" Lily said in a drawn out voice.

"Brigid, the traitor! She's talking to Snape!"

Lily looked over at Snape and saw only Dumbledore and Sirius Black.

"Not that Snape! Aden Snape," Morgan growled.

Lily saw Brigid and Aden talking and said, "Raja, who cares?"

"Yeah, I do," she said sharply.

"I forbid you to go over there and make an ass of yourself, Raja," Lily said punching Morgan in the arm lightly.

"Oh, you didn't," Morgan said in a flat voice that could only mean sarcasm.

"Oh, but I did," Lily said with a mischievous smile.

Morgan looked away and then casually flicked a pea at her.

"Oh, you didn't," Lily said in the same voice Morgan had used seconds before.

"Oh, but I did," Morgan replied.

"Would you two mind being a bit more serious?" Gwen said with so much sarcasm Lily thought she would drown.

"This is a very serious occasion," Katie said, imitating what Morgan usually sounded like.

Morgan and Lily looked at each other and had a hard time maintaining their laughter.

"Miss Lily," Dumbledore called out.

Lily turned to him quickly and put on her most innocent face. "Yes?"

"I was just telling my esteemed colleague Minister Rashad about your spectacular performance at the Yule Ball this winter and he has revealed to me that he is an avid music listener. Would you be so kind as to give us a performance?" Dumbledore asked.

Lily frowned and wouldn't have understood had Morgan not leaned over and explained it to her. "Brilliant! Moses is so brilliant. He wants to calm the people through music, I should have thought of that. Can't you feel the agitation in the room Lily? Sing something calming."

Lily licked her lips and nodded, summoning her guitar. It came to her and she scooted back in her chair, crossed her legs, and cleared her throat. The room was looking at her expectantly and she let her fingers fly lightly over the cords a couple of times before beginning.

"I took my love, I took it down/Climbed a mountain and I turned around/And I saw my reflection in the snow covered hills/Till the landslide brought me down.

"Oh, mirror in the sky what is love/Can the child within my heart rise above/Can I sail through the changin' ocean tides/Can I handle the seasons of my life/Umum, I don't know.....

"Well, I've been 'fraid of changin'/'Cause I've built my life around you/But time makes you bolder/Children get older/And I'm getting older too/So...

"I've been 'fraid of changin'/'Cause I've, I'd built my life around you/But time makes you bolder/Children get older/And I'm getting older too/I'm getting older too.

"So, take this love, take it down/Oh, if you climb the mountain and you turn around/If you see my reflection in the snow covered hills/Well the landslide will bring it down, down.

"And if you see my reflection in the snow covered hills/Well maybe...the landslide'll bring it down/Well, well, the landslide'll bring it down."

There was silence for a long time after that. Then slowly, the man from Louisiana, Red Decovenney, began clapping and the rest of the room joined in. Lily smiled and to her relief, many people seemed more calm and at ease. Conversations started where there was silence before and the fear hanging over the heads and hearts of the warriors turned into hope and determination.

"She is talented, isn't she," Hermione said to Ron as they sat next to Harry and Ginny. Harry and Ginny were pretty much ignoring them so Ron and Hermione did the same.

"Yeah, you should have heard her performance at the dance, I mean, it was hard rock, wild and-"

"-awesome," Hermione finished. "I know, I saw her band play while I was in America."

"What happened there? I mean, what was it like?" Ron asked. Lily hadn't told him much, but it was enough to make him interested.

"Well, the campus is a lot smaller than Hogwarts," Hermione began, "And there are fewer people in each house. They stress a lot of DADA and classes are longer. But we can live pretty much wherever we want. They have individual rooms outside of campus that you can go to, or if you are old enough, you can buy your own apartment."

"Don't they have like head of houses and house cups and competitions?"

"Well, we don't have head of houses, but we have Quidditch. I got the chance to see Fire play Wind before I left, it was really cool. Gwen and Katie are Fire Chasers with Brigid, though before Lily left, she was their third Chaser and Brigid played Keeper. Morgan plays Seeker for Wind and you see that guy that looks like Snape over there, Aden? He played Chaser for Wind. A couple of other people who are staying at the castle from Salem's played too. Um, Jackson Koves played Beater for Fire. There are a couple of others, but I don't remember them. American wizards play Quidditch much more dirty than here at Hogwarts. The game I was watching, Brigid pulled a knife on a Slytherin Chaser and dragged him off his broom and then beat him to a pulp on the field and the referee didn't do anything about it."

"Wicked!" Ron exclaimed.

Hermione shook her head and said, "What has been going on here?"

"A lot of stuff you already know about," Ron said, "I just can't believe this is all happening. I used to think that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named would never be defeated, it would just go on and on and we'd just keep holding him back. But you know now we are doing it, we are going to win, Hermione, we're gonna beat him."

Hermione looked down at her food and didn't answer for a long time. "I'm scared, Ron."

He looked at her for a moment and then took her hand. "Let's go in the hall."

She nodded and saw Lily wink at him as they left. When they got into the hall they continued walking to the lake. Finally Hermione turned to him and said, "Ron, all this is too big for me, I mean, before it was...easier. I saw what was going on was wrong and I just sort of went into action. But now I can see it, I know what will happen. It scares me; that people will die if we don't succeed."

"Hermione," Ron said quietly, "Don't you know, the fear is what makes it so we can be brave. If we weren't scared, we could never rise above and do what we were put in this house to do. When the time comes, you won't be scared and you'll do what is right, I know it."

"How'd you get so smart?" she asked quietly, hugging her black Hogwarts robes around her.

"Some people just know the answers," he answered with a smile.

"You've changed so much," she said inching closer to him.

"Not that much," Ron said as he put his arm on Hermione shoulder.

"You're different."

"Not really."

"You're older," Hermione commented, looking from the lake to his face.

"Same age as you," he said casually.

Hermione was quiet. If she was going to die tomorrow, she wasn't going to die not having made love to Ron. She loved him so much, he was older, more sure of himself. He wasn't blushing, though she couldn't tell because it was dark. He looked so peaceful with the wind blowing his fiery hair and his bright blue eyes focused on the moon over the horizon. He looked like the man she knew he would be one day, the man she knew she wanted to be with. Viktor had made her feel wanted; Ron made her feel loved. She had been fooling herself when she said she was in love with Viktor, how could she love anyone other than Ron? And he loved her. How could she make him see that? He was just so damn noble he wouldn't accept being a fallback guy. How could she make him see he wasn't? He was her one true love and nothing could take that away from her. She would have to just make him see.

"I'm sorry," she said after a while.

"For what?" Ron asked, turning to her.

"For this," she said quietly. Then she stood on her toes and pulled Ron into a

deep kiss. She felt his eyelashes flutter across her face in surprise and she just pulled him closer. Wrapping her arms around his neck she licked his lips before parting them with her tongue and slipping it in his wonderful tasting mouth. She finally broke off and looked up at him with all the love she felt in her heart radiating from her eyes.

"I love you so much, Ron," she whispered. "I want to show you, please."

"But-"

"I swear to you I've always loved you, I swear to you I always will. You are the other half of my soul, Ron; I couldn't live knowing you didn't feel the same way."

"I do, but-"

"Why can't you see I'd never hurt you like that? I'd never use you to fall back on; I'd never betray our love like that!"

"Here?" he asked.

Hermione sighed in relief. "I don't want to wait anymore."

"Well let's at least go into the forest a bit," Ron said; the all too familiar pinkening of his ears now visible.

Hermione laughed a bit and pulled him into the forest a ways and then pushing him up against a tree. She kissed him forcefully and desperately until he put his hand on her cheek. "Sh, Hermione, sh, my love."

Tears of joy began running down her face and she tried to push them away. Ron stopped her and lightly kissed each tear that fell from her eyes until she stopped. Hermione tilted her head up as he kissed her neck and chest bones. A heat warmed her body from the center out as she ran her hands under his shirt urgently. Viktor never made her feel like this, this was something only Ron would ever be able to do to her.

He pulled off his cloak and laid it on the ground. Hermione reclined back on it, taking his hand and pulling him down on top of her. "Hermione," he whispered huskily into her ear. The vibrations it made were enough to drive her wild.

She began unbuttoning his shirt as he kissed her. It was a kiss full of love and trust. She would never break that trust. Once she had taken off his shirt, she worked on his trousers and she felt the heat within her rise with ever inch he got closer to her. He had lifted her shirt over her head and he paused, looking at her for permission. All she did was smile and that was enough for him. It unlatched in the front, which through him for a loop when her two perfect breasts appeared before them.

He looked at her again and saw in her eyes a loving acceptance of everything he was doing. Her lips were curved ever so slightly and her hands ran over his biceps, edging him further. As his lips touched her delicate skin she began to shiver and the sensation swept over him as well, leaving him freezing and boiling at the same time. He ran his tongue around her nipple as she buried her hands in his thick red hair, pulling him closer. He was grateful for her warmth and kissed his way down her belly and to her skirt. She was now kicking off her shoes and he took the moment to shed his too. Then he reached behind her skirt and unzipped it, pulling down her legs.

Ron worked his way back to her lips and felt her tiny hands work at his pants almost feverishly until he held them in his and slipped off his pants. Almost immediately, her hands dove into his boxers and she began caressing him gently, running her hands up and down him and inching the boxers down his legs. Ron gasped and Hermione smiled up at him devilishly.

"Ron," she whispered, "I love you, I always will, I always have."

"I know," he said. Then he removed her panties and entered her slowly. It was sickening the speed he went. All Hermione wanted to do was go faster and all he did was smile at her reassuringly. It was torture, how could he do this to her?

"Ron," she moaned, biting her bottom lip, "it hurts."

"I know," he whispered. She clung to him tightly, her fingernails making marks on his shoulders, and buried her head in his neck. Hermione thought she was going to die, but found he was speeding up slightly, the gentle rocking of his hips picking up in tempo.

"Ron," she shuddered. His kissed her roughly as he moved harder. He was intoxicating; he made her want to scream. He made her hot like nothing else. Ron continued, filling her completely until she couldn't handle it anymore. She saw the lights and they were bright. Ron climaxed and held her close as she trembled in his arms.

Finally, Hermione gained enough control to look Ron in the face and found him smiling at her dreamily. He kissed her forehead and rolled in his back, pulling her on top of him then looking up at the stars through half-lidded eyes. His fingers were tangling themselves in her hair and drawing small designs on her back.

Hermione sighed and said, "That was wonderful."

"Good," he said in a deep voice, "So I did it right?"

Hermione giggled into his chest and said, "Yes, perfect scores. Don't tell me you've never done this before."

He shook his head in an unashamed manner, "Never."

Hermione folded her fingers on his chest and propped her chin up on them, looking into his face. "You were a virgin?"

"Yeah," he said with a chuckle, "What? Is that so hard to believe?"

"Well, yeah," she said matter of factly.

"I grew up with five older brothers, I've know what to do with a girl since I was eight. Besides, did you think it is the Weasley women that are so fertile? It's the guys, Hermione." Hermione smiled. "I wanted my first time to be with you since my first year, Hermione."

"I'm sorry," Hermione said sincerely.

"What are you sorry about now?" he asked her, kissing her forehead. "You can't have done this many things to be sorry for."

"I betrayed you," she said softly. "I didn't want to wait for you, I slept with Viktor."

"It's okay," he said, "We are together now."

"We are together now."

He nodded and they lay there for a long time. Hermione drifted off, but Ron looked into the moon again and thanked the Gods for what he now had.

Morgan had gone over to talk to Draco and found him utterly transfixed with the Veela girl, Gabrielle. He talked about her singing when she had come over twenty minutes ago and he still hadn't stopped.

"Do you think she'd talk to me, I mean, she seems pretty busy with her sister and I don't want to bother them. They look really close don't you think?" he prattled on.

Morgan looked over at the two French girls and said, "Draco, they are fighting."

"Really?" he asked in a bemused voice, "I hadn't noticed."

"Yeah," Morgan said into her glass. "I'm going to go hang myself now."

"Okay," he said in a distracted tone. He didn't even notice her absence. The Veela girl fascinated him. Her sparkling blue eyes, her wavy blonde hair, he wanted to touch it. He wanted to feel it in between his fingers and smell it. He tried to imagine what her skin tasted like but couldn't. The two of them (her and her abominable sister) exited the hall talking in hushed voices. (Out of pure curiosity, of course) Draco followed and stopped to listen to them argue.

"Vous ne me parlerez pas comme cela, la petite soeur!" Fleur cried out in French.

"Je vous parlerai cependant je s'il vous plaît, Fluer. Vous n'êtes pas ma mère et vous ne serez jamais!" Gabrielle countered. Then in English she said, "Just stay out of my life you stupid slut! I don't care if you kill yourself or not tomorrow, I wt have to worry about you if you do!"

Fleur gasped and said, "Fine zen. I'll leave. But just remember, I'm twice zee witch you'll efer be you spoilt little gairl."

"And I'm twice the person you'll ever be!" Gabrielle returned. Her English was better Draco noticed.

The two girls glared daggers at each other for a moment and then Fleur came storming down the hall where Draco was listening from. He backed up into a shadow as she passed and then after waiting a few moments, came down to where Gabrielle was still standing. He would have to play it cool if he wanted to get her to like him...or touch him...STOP, he said to himself, slowly.

"Pardon me," he said politely, "Are you lost?"

The little Veela girl turned on him fiercely. It was impossible to tell how old she was. Maybe her fifth year, her seventh, her third. She had a certain ageless look around her and her skin shone slightly of moonlight. "No," she said calmly.

"I'm Draco," he said formally, sticking out his hand.

She took it with her delicate hand and he felt his skin tingle under her touch. "Gabrielle."

"It is nice to meet you, Gabrielle. Were you one of the people at Salem's?" he asked inquisitively.

"Yes," she said with a solemn nod of her head. "Hermione Granger saved me. She saved a lot of people that day."

Draco nodded, willing to go on with anything the girl said. "I know, I went to school with her. She is the smartest person in our year." Gabrielle smiled at him and he felt his heart skip like thirty beats. "Would you like to go on a walk with me?"

She looked up at him speculatively. "I suppose."

Draco led her down the halls and did a silent victory dance in his head.

"Are you one of the warriors?" she asked after a moment.

"Yes," he answered with pride. "I'm in the Noble Six Hundred division."

"I'm jealous," Gabrielle sighed. "I wanted to get assigned to the Spider Crew but I'm too young. I wanted to do something to help."

"How old are you?" he asked curiously.

"Fifteen," she answered. "I wish I was old enough. I would give anything to avenge my friends. Marlena died that day. She was a good person. Many good people died that day."

"I know. Is that why you sang yesterday?" Draco asked.

"Yes," she answered. "It is the Veela song of passage. We sing it when one of our number have died. They are going to ride the wind and sing on forever."

"That is beautiful."

"Yes," she said. "We are an ancient people of the wind, singers and witches. My Grandmother taught my sister and me the ways of our people before she died. She told us there is magic in song, enchantment in the wind, and when you combined them, great miracles would occur."

"You were hoping for a miracle then?"

"No. I was hoping to give the people understanding. I wanted them to hurt less. You see, sometimes when I reach out to the wind, vibrations tell me things, what people feel, good vibrations, bad ones, evil ones," she explained.

Draco was enchanted. She was so purely magical, so pure, so perfect. She was worth fighting for if nothing else was.

"But tell me a bit about yourself," she urged. "Here I am, spilling my life story to a person I don't even know, totally uncharacteristic, and I don't even know your last name."

"It is Malfoy," Draco said quickly. "And there isn't much to tell."

"Well, tell me why you're fighting. I told you why I wanted to fight."

Draco frowned. He wanted to tell her, but he didn't. Not yet, he might scare her away. "It is complicated."

Gabrielle tilted her head, then after a moment nodded. "I understand. I wish you would tell me though. Because...I feel..."

She drowned off. Draco looked at her though; they had stopped in front of the school, facing the lake and the moon. She looked magnificent, like the moon was lighting her skin and making her glow almost. A cool breeze swept over them and Draco said, "What?"

"It is silly," she said, a light pink blush coming over her skin. Draco was enchanted with it; he had never seen anyone blush so delicately.

"Tell me," he urged gently.

"Well," she said, looking up at him through her eyelashes quickly, then turning back to the lake. "Alright. I feel like...like we've met before. I feel like I've known you...once, a long time ago. It is like there is a connection...I don't know. I told you it is silly."

"That isn't silly," he said with a smile. "What does the wind tell you?"

She blushed again. Then she looked at him seriously and said, "Alright."

Draco watched with interest as Gabrielle closed her eyes. The wind seemed to pick up a bit and sweep her hair back. It gave her a chilly sort of look, her skin glowing like that. She parted her lips a bit and turned her face to the moon. Then she opened her eyes and the wind failed. A light blush crept over her cheeks again but she controlled it.

"What did it say?" he asked.

"It told me to stop looking."

Draco paused. "What does that mean?"

Gabrielle looked away. "I don't want to tell you. You wouldn't want to push you away. I mean, it is really quite embarrassing and you'd just think it was stupid and I was too young and-"

"Gabrielle," he said softly, "You are rambling."

"Oh," she said briskly, "Am I. I'm sorry, I'll just go now; I'm not feeling quite well. Sometimes doing that makes me tired and I need to lie down."

She turned from the lakes edge and Draco grabbed her hand lightly. She turned around slowly, her hair shadowing her face slightly.

"What does that mean?" he asked again.

Gabrielle took a deep breath and then said quickly, "Well, when I was young I sort of wished for something on the wind and it was to find the man that would see through my blood and be able to read me like a human and not a Veela and they would love me and make me laugh and I would meet them and they we would fall in love instantly and I met you and something clicked and I don't want to scare you but you asked and the wind said stop looking and it has never...been...wrong."

Then she exhaled deeply and looked at his face before turning away briefly. Draco's eyes were wide open. And HE was afraid of scaring HER? How did this get more perfect?

"I know how you feel," he said after a moment.

She looked at him sharply, surprise playing over her graceful features. "You do?" she breathed.

"Exactly how," he answered

She looked him deep in the eye for a long time. Draco felt as if someone more practiced at soul searching than Dumbledore had was peering in at him. Her lips were slightly open and her glittering blue eyes reflected the lake's shimmering surface. Finally, she said, "Draco, would you like to kiss me?"

"Yes," he answered honestly.

She looked up at him trustingly and he put his palm on her cheek before drawing his lips to hers. She tasted like honey and butter cream and he couldn't resist slipping his tongue in her all too inviting mouth. Her delicate tongue met his tentatively and then he broke it off to look at her. He had felt it, but had she?

"Yes," she said, answering his unspoken question.

"I know," he whispered. Then he wrapped his arms around her protectively and put her head comfortably under his chin. It was like they were built for this. Her lithe arms found their way around his slim waist and she hugged him closer.

"I want you to come back," she said after a while.

"I will," he returned.

Gabrielle was silent for a moment and then she asked, "Promise?"

"Yes," he answered with all the confidence he could muster.

He felt her smile into his chest and he pulled her closer. He had finally found the other half of his soul and she was the most beautiful, wonderful human being on the planet. Neither were sure how long they stayed out there. They watched the moon rise to the top of the sky, warmed by each other's warmth, sustained by each other's hopes. It was a happy place and Draco would never forget it.

It must have been past midnight when they came back inside the castle. Draco took Gabrielle to her room and kissed her deeply before leaving to his. He felt whole for the first time in his life.

Morgan didn't want to talk to the twins either. They were so enwrapped in their mission; they barely stopped talking to the Weasley twins to make fun of her. The twins, both sets, would be leaving that night to spy on the Death Eaters at the Malfoy's home. They would be leaving around one and they were spending most of their time ironing out their plans. Morgan felt a little sorry for the Hermes Operation; they would have to stay up late two, or al least one of them.

"And what is the name of our contact again?" Katie asked.

"Cho, Cho Chang," Fred, the team's leader said.

"Choo choo?" Gwen said with a laugh.

Her sister smacked her upside the head. "Shut up."

Morgan sighed and got up to leave. It was just about time for her to leave, she had gotten too much stupidity for one night and tomorrow she would have to concentrate. It was about her bedtime anyway and she didn't really have any reason to stay. She got up and straightened her skirt and then headed out to the balcony, she needed a bit of fresh air.

Leaning against the stone railing of the balcony, she looked down on the campus. The moon was reflecting off the lake and it all looked so peaceful, the way a spring night was supposed to look. She breathed in the fresh air and sighed deeply.

"Somethin' wrong, Cher," an accented voice said from behind her.

She turned quickly and saw a man with bright red hair and blue eyes. He had a

toothpick in his teeth and was sitting on the balcony railing with his back against the castle wall. His eyes were half-closed and he seemed to not be looking at any place in particular.

"No," she said coldly as she turned back to the lake. A small breeze picked up and she shivered.

"Maybe ya should go back inside, 's bit chilly out. Wouldn't want yo' pretty face all frozen in that frown, now would ya?" he said conversationally.

"Mind your own damn business."

"I'm jus' sayin' ya look like ya need a friend...that o' an attitude 'justment. Now come on, Cher, don't be that way. What's yo' name?" he said in a half joking, half serious manner.

She looked him in the eye again and finally said, "Morgan Estellan."

"Red Decovenney, 's a pleasure ta meet ya," he said in a friendly manner. "An' if Ahm not presumin' too much, what brings ya out here?"

"What brings you out here?" she countered.

"Well Ah asked firs', but alright. I was thinkin' 'bout mah (A/N: my) home, whether not Ah was gonna see mah house 'gain, see mah girls 'gain, see mah bayou 'gain. So much good in the world, seems a shame ta have ta risk it all. But ya gotta do what ya gotta do."

After a moment, Morgan nodded. They were silent for a while until Morgan asked, "You are married then, you have children?"

"Yeah," Red said. "Ah got me six girls an' anotha' on the way. If it's a girl Ah'll be the happiest man alive, and if it's a boy, Ah'll be just as happy. What 'bout you? Goin' home ta anyone?"

"My parents are dead now, died in an Indian Death Eater attack around spring break. I'll live with my uncle Johannes until I move into my own place. I don't really have anyone but Brigid, Katie, Gwen, and Lily. But if we survive this, I won't even have Lily."

"She the sad lookin', dark haired, pretty one?" he asked.

"That is her."

"Where's she goin'?"

"Home. She lives very far away, very far. We'll probably never meet again, not until death."

Red looked confused. But he didn't say anything. After a moment, he got up and said, "Ah hope ya find happiness, Morgan Estellan."

"Thank you," she replied. Then the Louisianan left the little balcony and Morgan was alone again. Leaning over the edge of the railing again, she looked directly below her. It was so quiet down there. Would she ever be gifted with such peace? Inner turmoil had all but ripped her apart. Would her parents still be alive if she'd been there with them, would they be there to greet her at the family graduation festival if and when it occurred if she'd not been so selfish? It was hard to tell. It was hard to think about.

She sighed again and felt an odd sensation on her cheek. It was warm and running down her face slowly. Then it dropped on the stone railing and she realized what it was. A tear. How long had it been since she last cried? Too long. Not long enough. She hadn't cried when Steven had told her that her mother and father were dead. She hadn't cried for a long time.

She remembered it though. It had been when she was nine. Her mother and father were throwing a grand party and she wasn't allowed to go. She had pulled every trick she had ever learned, thrown ever tantrum she could, pouted at all the right places and she still didn't get her way. And then she got angry. It had been the first time she'd felt her blood; her Le Fay blood. It writhed in her like dark clouds in her bloodstream. And then it just came out. She had later been told that the spirit of Morgan Le Fay possessed her body, that the image of Morgan Le Fay could be seen shadowing her. They said the sky went dark and flashed of black lightning lit the sky. And then it rained and rained until the sky was dry and cracked.

Her own father had to shoot her with a tranquilizing gun. She couldn't been controlled. That had been the first time she killed anyone. Seven innocent bystanders, gone, just like that. She had cried for them and she felt she killed her parents as well as them. She wasn't innocent after that and she never would be. Only by shielding herself with ice could she keep the ferocious spirit of Morgan Le Fay at bay. Emotion brought her out and the ice on her heart numbed it so she didn't have emotions. It left her empty, but people safe.

The tears were flowing steadily from her eyes now, and sprinkles were forming on the railing. And that was when she heard him. "Miss Estellan?" It was Black of course. Her friends didn't understand.

"How," they asked, "could you possibly like him? He's so, so old...and not really boyfriend or even boy toy material. Just give up."

She always thought to her self then, How could I not want him? He is like me, jaded and cynical. He's a person who'll understand.

"Yes," she replied quietly.

He leaned up against the railing next to her, but not too close. She had a feeling that he wanted to though. She had gotten the same feeling after the graduation. He had wanted to say something to her, but with the attack and all...

Morgan risked a glance at him and saw him gazing out on the lake. His black hair was cropped shorter than it had been on the news all those years ago, and his black eyes had regained some shine from their previous dull look. But sometimes, she knew, when he thought people weren't looking, the look came back, the look of being trapped returned and he would sigh and then shake his head, as if willing himself to return to normal.

"What brings you out here all by yourself? You are supposed to be enjoying your meal with your friends," he said softly.

"I could ask the same as you," she returned.

"You could, but I asked first," he said.

"I'm contemplating what I'll do when this is all over, if it is...that is..."

Then he turned to her and frowned. "You were crying."

She snorted. "Is that so hard to believe? Hurry, some one crucify me, I'm human!"

"That isn't what I meant."

"I know."

She was silent for a long time before she answered him. "Do you ever feel like, if you had done one thing different...that...that you could save people; that some things happening wouldn't be happening?"

"Yes," he nodded. "Quite frequently, actually."

"How do you stay sane?"

"I'm not," he said with a sigh. "But being a father to Harry helps. Having a constant, a companion, like Remus, helps. Remembering to live in the present helps too."

"I feel like I killed them."

"Your parents."

"Yes. I could have protected them, I could have seen something...done something. At least I would have died doing something noble."

"You might still," he reminded her.

"Yes, I could still revenge them. If all goes well and we win the war tomorrow and all returns to normal. I expect that there will be Death Eaters that escape that I could hunt down and torture," she said. "What will you do, if we win?"

"The same thing most likely. There are a lot of people who I'd like to see personally get the Dementor's Kiss, or the knife," he replied honestly.

Morgan exhaled softly and felt an arm go around her shoulder and pull her close. "We'll make it," he said into her ear.

"Yes," she said quietly, "We will."

After another few cold breezes passed them by, Sirius looked her in the eye again. "Do you want to come up with me?"

"Yes."

He took her down a passage through the school to his rooms and no one saw them till morning.

Lily winked at Ron as he and Hermione left. FINALLY they were getting on the right track. The future was so close to being right she could smell it. Though she would never be quite right now. She wondered how different a person she would be. She felt so cold. Too much death, she decided. The deaths of too many are on my hands. She sighed and looked over at Brigid, she seemed happy. Her and Aden seemed to be of the same breed, perfect for each other in almost every way.

Morgan had ditched her for the twins, then for the solitude of the balcony. Ginny and Harry had left a little while before Ron and Hermione; no surprise what they were doing. Blaise Zabini had even left, probably to find his Gryffindor girlfriend. Draco had followed the Delacour girls out. Sirius wasn't long in going after Morgan once the Louisianan man left the balcony. There weren't many people in the hall now. Most of the foreigners had left already and in bed; it was late. There were only Dumbledore, McGonagall, Snape, and Flitwick at the head table. The only other people left in the Great Hall were her, the two Russian women, and the Texan, Corbin Dallas, who was doing his best to pick up one or both of them. She watched as all three of them left, the Texan looking very happy with himself. Soon, McGonagall and Flitwick left.

Lily sighed and propped her head on her hand. Not really looking at anything, she remembered. She would be going back soon. It didn't matter how things got on her world, this one would be safe. She knew that what she was doing would open dimensional rifts, making it so there were alternate futures. At least on future would be safe then. Once Voldemort was dead, she could get her watch and be home. They would win here, she knew it. And even if it took her life, she would see Voldemort defeated.

"Miss Lily," said the voice of the Headmaster, cutting through her thoughts. She looked up and saw him smiling down at her. "You'll need to get to bed tomorrow, it will be a long day."

She nodded and he left. But she didn't move. She didn't want to yet. She felt warm and comfortable, she could stay like this forever.

She would have too if not his shadow passed over her. He always looked like that, dark and penetrating. She didn't mind him examining her soul. In fact, she wished she'd examine some other things for her. She chuckled inwardly and slowly turned her gaze upward. He was doing it again, looking at her like she'd leave. She couldn't lie to him, she would leave, and she would never come back.

"Yes," she said in a thick voice.

The corner of his lip turned up in a sneer and he said, "You should do as Dumbledore says, tomorrow will be a long day."

"I know," she said quietly.

He turned and walked away. But just as he was about to leave the room, Lily called out to him. "Why do ya hate me, Sev'rus?"

He stopped cold.

"I can only do what is good fo' all those people. I can't stay here, too many things need fixin' where I'm from. Ya believe me, don't ya? Because I'd neva' lie ta ya, Sev'rus. I can't lie ta ya."

"What about you?" he said after a moment, "Can't you do something for you?"

"No," she said, getting up and walking over to him. "Because it isn't about that, Sev'rus."

"Then what is it about?" he growled, turning to meet her. She stopped dead a few feet from him.

"It's 'bout what is right," she replied. "It's 'bout doin' what I was sent here ta do. It's 'bout sacrifice. It's 'bout duty, Sev'rus."

"Damn duty! Damn what is right and damn sacrifice! You are looking for an easy way out!" he snarled. Then he turned and stalked off to his dungeons.

Lily was stung. She was doing the hardest thing in the world leaving here. She was leaving her parents, her friends, and her love! She stomped after him.

"It that what yer gonna call it, Sev'rus?" she practically screeched after him. "Yer gonna call what I'M doin' the easy way out? I've got news fo' you Sev'rus Snape! This is the hardest thing I've done EVER! But ya can stalk off an' pretend I don't matta' because someday, a long time from now, ya'll forget all 'bout me an' ya'll be happy!"

"I sincerely doubt that," he said over his shoulder, picking up the pace. "Especially since I've only been truly happy for three weeks and a day in my life."

Lily stopped walking. The familiarity of this place, the one night she'd spend down there with him, came creeping back. And what he'd said stung. But he doesn't understand, she reminded herself, He doesn't know what I do.

Lily's lower jaw trembled violently as she tried to get a hold of herself. "Why?" she practically sobbed, "Why did ya have ta say that, Sev'rus?"

He wheeled on her and said, "Because it is true."

Lily couldn't stand it anymore. He was too close. He was too far. She flung herself at him and cried desperately into his chest. Pounding once on his chest she sobbed out loud. "I hate you...I hate you..."

All of the sadness she felt, all of the desperation and aching she felt seeped from her skin. And after a while she felt his arms close around her and move up and down her back.

Snape led Lily into his room and laid her down on the bed. She soon fell asleep and he went in after her. He would always forgive her.

It was very, very morning when Snape felt it. A slow, warm sensation on his lips. The delicate pressure was followed by soft lips caressing his cheeks, his eyelids, his ears. As he became more awake, he realized it was Lily. She was looking lovingly at him, seeming to memorize him. Her lithe fingers traced his jaw lightly stopping just at the hallow under his Adam's Apple to plant a light kiss.

"What are you doing?" he asked in an early-morning whisper.

"Sh," is all she said.

Lily had taken one of his hands and was caressing its every surface with her fingers and lips. She slid her cheek into his palm and then kissed his wrist. She outlined his chest slowly, taking the time to circle his nipples lightly and then lick them before blowing softly. He shivered and felt his eyes roll to the back of his head. This was the most sensual experience he had ever felt. Just the thought of her touching him, her skin on his, feeling, stroking, tasting. He bit his bottom lip in attempt to stop himself from stopping her.

"Let me make love to you, Sev'rus," she said quietly into his ear, the vibrations of her voice reverberating in his scull and sending more waves of pleasure down his spine. He would give her the world if he owned it.

She kissed his earlobe and inhaled his scent in a luxuriously slow manner. Lily's leg swung around his waist and pinned him down. It was then that Snape realized the annoying fact that he was not only shirtless AND pant-less, but she was almost completely clothed. As though reading his mind, she took off her shirt (though at an infuriatingly slow pace) and slid off her skirt and underwear, then unclipped her bra. Immediately, his lips sought out her breasts and he sucked at them like a desperate man. Only by kissing him slowly and reassuringly was she able to calm him, and even then, he felt the agitation and need strongly.

Lily kissed his chest again as she pulled down his boxers, brushing her aroused state over him a couple of times. Snape was burning inside, a raging inferno of love and heat and emotion. He couldn't even say how much he loved his woman. She moved across him one more time before taking him in herself. He took hold of her hips and she leaned forward just enough to elect a moan of pleasure from him. She ground down on him lightly at first, then with more and more force. He would have liked to watch her in her ecstasy but he was too caught up in his own. Her sensual slow rhythm had turned into a controlled passion.

And then he exploded in her just in time to hear her call his name as she orgasmed, "Sev'rus!"

She fell limply on his chest. Snape vaguely remembered her smiling against his chest. He tangled his hands in her hair and listened to her breathe. He was lulled to sleep by the rhythmic beating of her heart. It matched his.

When he woke again, she was gone.

Harry looked at Ginny as she slept. He didn't want to wake her, but he had to say good-bye, she'd kill him when he got back if he didn't. If he got back. He wanted immortality with her, but both of them knew there was a distinct possibility they wouldn't get it.

Ginny had told him last night, she was pregnant. She told him he would always be with her now, no matter what happened.

"Gin," he said quietly, stroking her hair, "Ginny."

She stretched languidly and looked him in the eye. "Harry."

"It's time," he said. Slowly, she nodded.

"I love you, Harry Potter, don't you forget that," she whispered. He could smell her tears.

"I love you Virginia Weasley," he replied. "And when I get back, you and I are getting married."

"I do," she said softly.

"I know."

He placed a tender kiss on each of her cheeks before capturing her mouth affectionately. Regretfully, he pulled back and looked at her one more time. Her face shone of love and hope.

Harry closed the door with out another word and made his way to the Apparation Room. He was one of the last people in. Snape walked in behind him and behind Snape the edgy looking Texan.

"Alright!" said the voice of a driven looking Morgan Estellan called out over the crowd. "Here is what is going on: The Spider Crew moved into position this morning at about two or two thirty. They have been reporting through Miss Cho Chang this whole time. As soon as Flitwick gives the okay, John Wilkes-Booth will move in. Immediately afterwards, the Noble Six Hundred will enter and right after that, Operation Mama Bear. At the last possible minute, the Calvary will move into position. I would like each of you to take a ring from one of the channelers now, it doesn't matter who. Good, good. Now, what are we at Professor Flitwick?"

"Thirty seconds and counting," the small professor piped.

"Good, good, all on plan," she said. "Hermes Operation, exit to Rowena's Study, the channeling room. John Wilkes-Booth, ready in position for Apparation in..."

"Ten," the squeaky professor said. "Nine...eight...seven...six...five...four... three...two...one..."

The four operatives, Brigid Kells, Aden Snape, Akira Hino, and Corbin Dallas, vanished.

Harry saw Morgan's green ring glow after about five minutes. She nodded her head and said, "Noble Six Hundred, prepare for Apparation. Five...four...three... two...one..."

And the eighteen noble operatives flashed out of sight. Harry's stomach flipped inside of him as he waited.

About eight minutes after the departure of the Noble Six Hundred, her ring glowed again. Harry thought his meant she was talking through the channelers. "Operation Mama Bear, ready for Apparation in five...four...three...two...one..."

Minerva McGonagall, Fleur Delacour, Adam Davies, Nataya Voskovsky, and Austin Bowler were gone, gone off to save innocents.

It was only Morgan, the Turkish Minister, and Ollivander and the rest of the Calvary now. He still had a few minutes. Dumbledore put a reassuring hand on his shoulder and gave it a squeeze of reassurance. The man, Steven Woodsrow, was talking to Lily quietly and Snape was standing in the corner, looking ferocious. The minutes seemed to drag on forever and ever. The quiet was almost unbearable, almost deafening.

Finally, Morgan's ring glowed green again and she said, "Calvary, good luck. Ready for Apparation in ten...nine...eight...seven...six...five...four...three...two... one..."

Then Dumbledore grabbed his shoulder and a familiar pulling sensation pulled his body out of the room.

Morgan let out a deep breath as they vanished. All their hopes were strung on those people doing what they could to kill Voldemort. "They'll do it Uncle," she said, "I know they will."

Ollivander looked at her with his pale, moon colored eyes, and said, "Only time will tell. Come, let's take our spots."

She nodded and the Turkish Minister of Magic followed them into Rowena's Study. Rowena had been an expert channeler. Myths said she could carry over thirty messages at a time. Her room was designed to feel these vibrations and intensify them.

Morgan followed her uncle and the minister into the dark, room. The rings of the channelers, Celeste Sinestra, Cho Chang, Nadia Turpin, and Esacia Badu, glowed in their respective red, yellow, blue, and green colors. The channelers of Operation Hermes sat on the ground in a circle, holding each others hands. Eyes closed and hearts beating as one, they dutifully carried the messages to those who needed it.

"Now," said Professor Flitwick, "Don't be shy, just step right in the middle like. Sit back to back to back and hold hands. If the charm works like it should, you will be able to see though whomever's eyes you need to. And if I do say so myself, it is my master piece, I designed it just for this and it better work. Just think about the person you want to see though and the channelers will do the rest. Go on now, go on!"

Tentatively, Morgan, Ollivander, and Moses Rashad, stepped over the hands of the channelers and into the center of their circle. They sat back to back to back like instruct and joined hands. All that was left to do was think of some one. Gwen Matson, she thought. She closed her eyes tight and she saw it. Or him...or whatever it was.