Doesn't Ring a Bell

I dare you to find a charm to make someone's clothes invisible, and use it on...

"Snivellus."

James pronounced Sirius's fate with a grin.

"Are you mad!?" spluttered Sirius. "Who would want to see him naked!?"

"Well," said James with a snicker, "I don't think Peter would mind that much."

Peter almost choked on a Chocolate Frog he was eating. "Relax, Wormtail, I was just kidding!" James added hastily, looking alarmed. Peter looked relieved; he was worried they would uncover his secret...

"When do I have to do this by?" Sirius asked, interrupting Peter's thoughts. Now that the shock of the dare had worn off, Sirius thought this could be kind of fun.

"Next week," Remus supplied.

Sirius whistled. "You want me to research and master a spell in a week? Well, it'll be difficult, but not impossible."

James grinned. "Right, Remus, truth or dare?" As Sirius went off to find out how to do this spell, Remus got the most terrifying dare of his life...

* * * * *

Nothing very interesting happened in the next few days; Sirius got a detention from Slughorn for putting slugs in his morning pumpkin juice and James tried to talk to Lily, but had a chicken wing thrown at his head. On the Wednesday morning, the four Marauders walked into the Great Hall. Sirius, though he was preoccupied with the dare he was going to complete this morning, noticed Remus's robes looked looser than usual. He decided not to question him about it, though, and sat down at the Gryffindor table. Unfortunately for him, there was already somebody sitting in the seat he chose.

"BLACK!" screamed Katrina, one of Lily's friends.

Sirius stood up hastily. "Sorry," he mumbled. Unbeknownst to the rest of the world, he and Katrina harbored a love/hate relationship. The love bit being they had had crushes on each other since second year, though neither knew the other did, and the hate part - well, they didn't always get on so well...

"WHY MUST YOU RUIN BREAKFAST FOR ME TODAY, BLACK? WHY?" She then stormed out of the Hall. But when she was about halfway to the doors, Sirius had an idea.

"OI! KAT!" he yelled after her, conjuring a milkshake from thin air. As she turned around he piffed the milkshake at her head, scoring a perfect bull's-eye. She glared at him, but decided to get her revenge later, when she didn't smell like artificially flavored banana milk.

Remus was feeling edgy enough already, without Sirius acting like a complete prat. "Sirius..." he said warningly. Sirius looked around, and the grin slid off his face like stinksap. Severus Snape, A.K.A Snivellus, had just walked into the Hall.

"Okay." He mustered up all his courage, and made little circles with his wand as he muttered, "Vestis defluo", and piece by piece, Snape's clothing started to disappear. First went his shoes, revealing neon pink socks. Then, off with his shirt, showing a pale chest and gangly arms. The next item of clothing to disappear was his pants, showing his graying, dirty briefs. When he was just standing there in his socks and underwear, some of the students started to laugh. Off came his neon pink socks. Most of the younger students covered their eyes for the grand finale, but the show was only just beginning. As Sirius prepared for the underpants coming off - dreading what he was about to see - James pulled out his wand and muttered something under his breath. Some of the older students looked disappointed. But as Sirius was wondering why his spell hadn't fully worked, loud techno music started playing, seemingly from nowhere.

If Snape had been smart, he would have run right about now, but what happened next rooted him to the spot, because Remus had just stood up and was...moving...with the music. Sirius stared in shock as he found out why Remus's robes were so loose this morning. Remus was doing a striptease. He pulled off his robes, and swung them around his head, revealing a toned chest that nobody had really thought he possessed. And was Remus Lupin seriously wearing a spiked dog collar?

Before anyone could register this shock, off came his pants, which made most of the girls start fanning themselves. You see, he was wearing leather short shorts. Very TIGHT leather short shorts. And knee-high leather boots. He starting gyrating over to Snape, who still looked as though he'd been hit by a Full Body-Bind. As Remus wiggled over to Snape, he put out one finger in front of him, and motioned for Snape to come closer. Grinning, James flicked his wand, and Snape found himself walking over to Remus as though in a trance.

Remus considered running away and never looking back as he thought about what he had to do next, but that was not the Marauder way. He tensed as he ran his hands over Snape's skinny chest, and slid down, down, down until he was kneeling in front of Snape. He almost gagged as he grabbed the waistband of Snape's graying underpants with his teeth and pulled them off his weedy little body. His dare done, he spat out the underpants, grabbed up his robes and ran spitting out of the great hall. He planned on scrubbing and rinsing his mouth out until next Christmas.

The trance like state Snape was in wore off when he realized people were laughing at him, and he flushed and covered *ahem* himself with one of the plates from the table nearest to him and ran out of the Great Hall. Where were the teachers during all this, you ask? Oh, they had...other things to attend to...

Flashback

"PROFESSOR DUMBLEDORE!" a boy was screaming as he ran through the halls towards the teachers' lounge.

"Pettigrew!" a voice said sharply. The voice belonged to Professor McGonagall. "What do you think you are doing running around the corridors at this hour in the morning?" she questioned him, looking forbidding in her tartan dressing gown.

"I, er, that is to say..." Peter stammered.

"Well spit it out, boy, I don't have all day!"

"I am looking for Professor Dumbledore because of something that happened in the staffroom," he said in a rush.

"Well, go to breakfast, Mr. Pettigrew, I will find Albus and let him know."

"No need, Minerva, I'm already here," came a pleasant voice from an empty classroom.

McGonagall didn't bother asking why he was in there. She beckoned him to follow her to the staffroom, and as she turned the corner she ran right into Peter. He was trying to find out if anything was going on between McGonagall and Dumbledore, you see. "Breakfast, now!" McGonagall barked at him, and he scampered off.

"Well, we ought to go see what it is Mr. Pettigrew was so anxious to see me about," said Dumbledore cheerfully.

* * * * * * *

As they walked into the staffroom, the door slammed shut behind them, and a pleasant tingling sensation ran through their bodies. "Albus!" McGonagall gasped. "I have become my Animagus form...and I can't change back!"

"At least you're only a tabby cat," came an annoyed voice from behind her.

She turned around to see a fat crow sitting there. "Horace?" she questioned.

"In the flesh...sort of," the crow answered. McGonagall jumped; she wasn't used to talking in her cat form. I wonder what Albus is...she thought.

"Hello, Minerva!" a voice called from above her. She looked up to see a bright red and gold phoenix hovering above her. "What's new, pussycat?" the new Dumbledore asked her. "Oh, I have been wanting to do that for such a long time!" he stated gleefully.

"Albus, get down here at once, we need to work out why we're here, and how to change ourselves back!"

"Oh, I think this is kind of fun, don't you, Minerva?" he said, flying around the roof.

"No, I do not! Come down at once!" Dumbledore sighed, but flew down onto the ground, and stared intently at McGonagall. "Well, first things first, we need to figure out why we are animals, then we need to figure out how to change back."

"Well, the change happened when we walked into the room; maybe we can walk out and it will be reversed?" Slughorn suggested.

"Oh, that is the stupidest idea I have ever heard...but we have nothing better to do, so let's try it," McGonagall said doubtfully. They all walked over to the door, McGonagall stuck her paw under it and pulled it open, and as soon as it was open they all rushed outside.

"Well, that didn't work," McGonagall said dryly. They decided the safest place for them would probably be the staffroom, and sat down, trying to think of another way to reverse the spell.

"This is probably the Marauders' doing. Therefore, we will have to think like them to reverse one of their spells," said Dumbledore, his eyes twinkling.

"So, what do you suggest?" asked McGonagall warily. Dumbledore stood up, and, using a candle from one of the brackets on the wall, set fire to his own tail feathers. Within seconds, he was back to normal, but still smelled of burning feathers. He then set fire to McGonagall's tail, same with Slughorn and the others. "Come on, the Marauders must have trapped us here for some reason."

And they set off towards the Great Hall.

End flashback

"POTTER! BLACK!" McGonagall shouted as she burst through the doors of the Great Hall. They looked around in terror.

"Why, Professor McGonagall, where have you been?" Sirius asked nervously. "I think you know very well where I've been, Mr. Black," she said menacingly.

"Now, Professor, why would you think that?" asked James, then, realizing she had no idea what had gone on this morning, added, "We are very sorry we cast that spell on you and your fellow staff members, it was wrong, and we hope you forgive us."

"Detention. Tomorrow night. Six o'clock. My office. Now, out!" she yelled at them. They flounced out of the Great Hall to look for Remus, and plot what they were going to do in detention.