Hidden Magic

Chapter 5

The last two weeks had gone by very quickly for Jamaila, she had been taking her classes and she immensely enjoyed them. She had also made friends with some other people from different houses, like Hannah Abbott and Ernie Macmillan.

In fact the only person who did not seem pleased to meet her was Draco Malfoy. During the war Draco's father, Lucius had been killed and it made Draco realise how prejudiced and righteous his father really was. Although, he had learnt to be civil to almost everyone he could still be malicious.

So it didn't really surprise Jamaila when she was walking through a deserted hallway, heading towards the library, when Draco came running down the hall and ran straight into her sending him falling backwards.

"Oh sorry, Draco," apologised Jamaila, handing him his books.

Standing up and dusting him off he said, "Well, next time don't just stand in the middle of a hallway when other people are walking there."

"Excuse me? But you were running right at me and I wasn't standing still," explained Jamaila.

"Yeah, well I wouldn't have run into you, if you had moved," replied Draco.

"You can't blame this on me for your stupid mistake!" exclaimed Jamaila.

"Watch me." His gave her an icy glare enough to freeze any first year Hufflepuffs. But, enough to set Jamaila's fiery temper ablaze.

"Why, are you going to...dance?" asked Jamaila sarcastically.

"Don't try to be smart with me," sneered Draco.

Smiling smugly Jamaila replied, "I don't have to try, it comes naturally."

"You're not funny McGowan!" exclaimed Draco coldly.

"That's Miss McGowan to idiots like you."

"No, if you had a title of Miss McGowan you would be a witch. But, aren't. So, it's just McGowan for you," explained Draco maliciously.

"I don't know what you're talking about, of course I'm a witch," replied Jamaila, Oh no! He knows, he knows, he knows.

"Don't play dumb, we both know that the McGowan family had a squib for a daughter. Is it just coincidence that your last name is Jamaila-Ashley McGowan?" asked Draco tauntingly.

"Go to Hell, you don't know anything," answered Jamaila coldly and she stormed off.

Him taunting her about her family had struck a nerve, straightening herself up she walked irately into the library to do some last minute homework.

Setting her bag down, she went to the Transfiguration part of the library choosing the book required for her Transfiguration homework and went back to her table.

Opening the book, Jamaila began turning the pages over not really seeing the words on the pages at all. She couldn't concentrate on her homework after her encounter with Malfoy. His taunting was still fresh in her mind. Merlin, why does it hurt to hear about my family? I thought, I would have been fine now, maybe it's true what Hermione said 'everything takes time', thought Jamaila miserably.

It was true that Jamaila could now get on from a-day-to-day basis without thinking about her family. But, if she didn't keep herself occupied enough she would find herself wondering what her life would have been like if she hadn't been thrown out.

***

Jamaila had been studying for over an hour when Harry and Ron interrupted her, sitting down in front of her looking over the top of the book she was reading, she smiled.

"What?" Jamaila looked curiously at both boys.

"Hermione's been looking for you since DADA finished, she said to tell you it's important," answered Harry.

"What has she got to tell me?" asked Jamaila perplexed.

"We don't know," Ron replied while shrugging his shoulders.

"Fine, I'll go find her. She should be in the common room right?" Jamaila enquired as she hurriedly packed her books into her bag.

"Yep," replied Harry, setting down his own bag and settled into the chair next to hers.

"See you both later then," said Jamaila grabbing her bag and walked out of the library.

Reaching the portrait of the fat lady, she uttered the new password 'Griffin' and stepped into the deserted common room. It seemed deserted, as everyone was at dinner. She'd have to go there and just then she saw Hermione came down from the girl's dormitory as the portrait closed behind her.

"There you are, I've been looking for you," said Hermione stepping into the common room.

"Well, I found you. Ron and Harry said you were looking for me. So, what did you want?" asked Jamaila setting her bag down and then sitting down.

Hermione sat next to her took a deep breath and asked, "Do you realise that full moon is tomorrow night?"

"Yeah, I know. So what?" questioned Jamaila, she shifted uncomfortably in her chair.

"I asked Professor Lupin where you ought to go and he advised that you'll have to go to the Shrieking Shack, if you aren't willing to take the wolfsbane potion." explained Hermione clinically.

"I never said I wasn't willing, I just don't want it," snapped Jamaila.

"If you don't take it, you'll become a monster!" Hermione snapped back.

Standing up, with her hands on her hips she cried, "So, now you're calling me a monster!"

"No, I'm not saying anything like that, I'm just passing on a message from Professor Lupin," explained Hermione hurriedly, realising at the sudden strained situation.

"Oh great. First you, Now, Professor Lupin thinks I'm one too," retorted Jamaila misunderstanding Hermione's sentence altogether, "Well, we'll see about that!"

Jamaila turned on her heel and stormed out, she was fuming; she was just starting to trust Hermione and Professor Lupin. Calling me a monster, no one gets away with that, thought Jamaila angrily.

Jamaila found Professor Lupin in his classroom. All the classes had ended before dinner. Knocking once, Jamaila twisted the doorknob just as she'd heard a muffled 'enter' from him and stormed into the classroom.

"Hello Jamaila. What brings you here?" asked Lupin kindly, though he was taken aback by the anger in her stance as she walked up to him.

"Like you don't know!" exclaimed Jamaila spatting like a wildcat.

"Know what?" asked Lupin in between bewilderment and annoyance.

"What did you say to Hermione?" asked Jamaila ignoring Lupin's question.

"Nothing. Look what's going on that you feel the need to walk straight in here and start shouting?" asked Professor Lupin calmly eyeing her like a father would to a child showing tantrums.

"According to Hermione, if I don't take that stupid potion, I'll be a monster. She also said she was just passing on what you had said," explained Jamaila angrily.

"Okay. First off you need to calm down, so sit down," replied Lupin motioning her to sit. Sighing, Jamaila sat down. He then looked at her straight in the eye, "Secondly, I didn't say that."

"Well, you must have said something," pointed out Jamaila,

"Hermione asked where you'd go on the full moon. I merely said if you don't wish to take the wolfsbane potion, then you'd turn into a full fledged werewolf and you'd have to go to the shack," explained Lupin gently but firm, so she would understand the whole situation.

Sighing Jamaila asked, "You never said 'monster' did you?"

"Look, I've been a werewolf for practically the whole of my life. If I ever met someone else, like yourself that has been bitten I will never ever call them a monster," Lupin spoke softly and in a manner that made Jamaila feel ashamed of her outburst.

Placing her head in her arms Jamaila muffled voice said, "I've just made a total fool of myself."

"It doesn't matter. Don't worry about it," replied Lupin, patting her shoulder.

"Which thing don't I worry about?" asked Jamaila raising her head, sadness crept in her voice.

"You don't worry about anything. If you worry you'll make your self ill," answered Lupin logically.

"Okay, I'll try not to. Oh...um...sorry about before," Jamaila apologized, feeling awkward and insecure.

"That's okay. You'll probably find your temper on a short fuse around the full moon. Now I have work to do and you need to get back to Gryffindor tower," Lupin gave her a small smile.

Jamaila nodded and stood up, on standing up Jamaila all of a sudden went very dizzy and very light headed, her legs gave way and she fell hard onto the floor and twisted her ankle.

"Jamaila, you okay?" asked Lupin urgently and was at her side.

"I'm quite dizzy," replied Jamaila closing her eyes and holding her head.

"Come on sit back onto the chair," said Lupin, helping Jamaila back onto the chair, and conjuring a glass of water. "Here drink this," Lupin pushed the glass of water into Jamaila's hands.

Taking a sip Jamaila realised her right ankle was slightly tingling, placing the glass on the table she reached down to her ankle and pulling her shoe off she noticed it was slightly swollen, sitting back up she said, "Damn, I've twisted my ankle."

"Don't worry, Madam Pomfrey can sort that out. How do you feel now?" Lupin

"Better. Thanks for the water, and sorry," replied Jamaila meekly.

"For what?" Lupin smiled slightly, "You haven't done anything wrong."

"For nearly passing out on you," Jamaila closed her eyes in shame.

"Don't be ridiculous. You might have just stood up too fast," Lupin reasoned and patted her shoulder consolingly again.

"No. I don't think I did. It's strange, I can feel the wolf inside me and it's like it wants to get out and hurt people." Jamaila looked at him in anxiety.

"Jamaila you have got to realise that tomorrow night is not going to be easy. Maybe if you took the wolfsbane potion you'd feel more relaxed," suggested Lupin, he eyed her with concern.

"No," Jamaila shook her head.

"I don't know why you won't take it but..." Lupin was cut off by a knock on his door.

Lupin opened his door to find Snape holding a goblet full of foul smelling wolfsbane potion, with her heightened sense of smell she remarked, "If it tastes as bad as it smells then I definitely don't want any."

Arching his brow Snape's voice was as icy as he spoke to her. "Miss McGowan, are you quiet certain you don't want any?"

Her eyes narrowed in irritation and she replied just as coldly, "No, I don't want anything. Thank you, Professor."

"Very well," Professor Snape shifting his dark gaze to Professor Lupin, "Lupin, you'll need to take some more tomorrow." He walked out of Lupin's office and closed the door.

Sitting back down, Remus drank the potion down in one go and shuddered slightly, placing the goblet back on the table he stood up, glancing at her, "Come on, lets get you up to the hospital wing,"

Jamaila stood on her left leg and gingerly tried to put her right heel down. She managed to place the front of her foot down but when she tried her heel hurt her.

"Professor, could you help me please?" asked Jamaila, it was the first time she had asked for help since, well since forever.

"Of course."

Jamaila held on to the offered arm and she hobbled out of the classroom and down towards the hospital wing. Some students were laughing at Jamaila, as she hobbled past them trying hard not to send them a dirty look.

Half way there Harry, Ron and Hermione spotted her limping towards them. Ron noticed how odd they looked amongst the sea of students, nudging Harry they both burst out laughing.

"Oh, honestly can't you two ever grow up?" Hermione shook her head indignantly, walking over to Jamaila and Lupin.

"Hey Hermione, what are Harry and Ron laughing at?" asked Jamaila stopping to relax for a moment,

"They're laughing at you and Professor Lupin. But, don't worry they're just immature," replied Hermione a little too loudly, so Harry Ron could hear her.

Both Harry and Ron stopped laughing at Hermione's remark and came walking over to them.

"Hi! Professor, Jamaila," Ron smiled sheepishly at them.

"Hello Professor, Jamaila. You okay, Professor?" asked Harry thinking it was Lupin going down to the hospital wing and Jamaila was just walking with him.

"Yes, albeit tired. What are you three doing waiting around a hallway?" Professor Lupin looked at them enquiringly.

"Hermione said she'd upset Jamaila. Well, we didn't think it would have been nice if we had tried to stop her going to you when she was angry." Harry explained in a hurried tone.

"Hermione!" exclaimed Jamaila angrily.

"Jamaila, I didn't say anything about... well about anything," replied Hermione defending herself.

"You better not. If I find out you told someone, you'll not know what happened," through gritted teeth Jamaila threatened Hermione.

"Jamaila, control yourself now," ordered Lupin.

Jamaila just shrugged and carried on walking, well half walking half limping towards the infirmary. Just before she hobbled into the hospital wing Harry came up behind her and asked, "What was that about?"

"Doesn't matter," Jamaila brushed him off.

"Actually, you'll probably find it does matter. I don't think it was very nice of you to threaten Hermione or ignore Professor Lupin," retorted Harry angrily.

"Drop it," replied Jamaila, stepping into the infirmary she went slightly dizzy again, Harry caught her before she fell again.

"Hey, you okay?" asked Harry as he supported her.

"Like you care, just help me to a bed and get Madam Pomfrey please," answered Jamaila a little too sweetly.

Harry led Jamaila to a bed and went to fetch madam Pomfrey leaving Jamaila to her thoughts, "I feel terrible! Blasted moon, always ruining everything even before I left home", thought Jamaila miserably.

Harry came back a couple of minutes later with Madam Pomfrey. Harry sat down on the chair next to Jamaila's bed whilst Madam Pomfrey examined her ankle.

"Well Miss McGowan, you haven't broken your ankle. But, since tomorrow is, well you know, I cannot give you any pain-relieving potion. I'll put a bandage on it for now." explained Madam Pomfrey.

Madam Pomfrey sent both Jamaila and Harry on their way five minutes later. Once out of earshot of Madam Pomfrey, Harry's anger returned.

"So what did happened between you, Hermione, and Professor Lupin?" questioned Harry.

"Nothing and I already told you it doesn't matter," repeated Jamaila.

"And I told you, if you argue with my friends, then it does matter," Harry replied, still unwilling let it go.

"Drop it now or..." Jamaila's voice faded.

"Or what?" questioned Harry

"Just drop it," repeated Jamaila

"Or you'll what?"

"Drop it,"

"Or you'll what? Use your telekinesis to throw me across the room?" asked Harry loudly as they entered the great hall, which went quiet at the sound of Harry's raised voice.

"I said drop it Harry I won't say again," replied Jamaila.

"Or you'll throw me from the room is that it?" questioned Harry loudly, most of the seventh and sixth years knew Harry could get angry and when he got angry everyone made sure to stay out of his way.

Jamaila lost her temper at the last comment she spun round and screamed "SHUT YOUR MOUTH HARRY, I HAVE BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH ALREADY WITHOUT YOU EGGING ME ON TO HURT YOU, IF THAT IS WHAT YOU WANT THEN I WILL DO IT BUT I WILL THEN BE THROWN OUT OF THIS SCHOOL FOR HURTING SOMEONE." And she sat down.

The whole hall was in complete shock and nobody dared move a muscle for fear of having either Jamaila or Harry shouting at him or her.

What they had both failed to realize was that there were the teachers at the top table as well, until professor Dumbledore stood up and said, "Would Mr. Potter and Miss McGowan please go to Professor McGonagall office immediately."

Jamaila and Harry walked out the hall in silence and down the corridor to Professor McGonagall office. They were meet outside by Professors Dumbledore and Lupin who were using the office because it was the closet one then walking up to the seventh floor. Both Jamaila and Harry went into the office and sat down neither of them preparing to tell the professors what had really happened.

"So, Harry would you like to tell us why you started a shouting match in the middle of the great hall?" Although, Dumbledore spoke calmly to them, there was no mistake of a slight edge of hardness in his tone.

Neither of them spoke, Jamaila was looking out the window totally ignoring them and Harry was studying the floor and was uncomfortable when Dumbledore had asked him.

"Since you have both conveniently lost your voices. I'll ask Jamaila to please wait outside whilst I question Harry, then I'll ask you back in," replied Dumbledore.

Jamaila nodded and walked out, after she made sure the door was closed she walked out into the grounds found a bench and sat on it until they got her back in.

***

Back inside Professor McGonagall office, Remus asked, "Harry what did you say to her?"

Harry stayed silent and carried on looking at the floor, he had seen Remus slightly angry before but it still startled him that he could get that angry.

"Harry, I suggest you tell us both why you started this fight?" asked Remus angrily.

"I didn't, she did," mumbled Harry.

"What did she do?" asked Remus calming himself down.

Looking up Harry replied, "She threatened Hermione, and ignored you."

"What? So, you just thought you'd have a shout at her, did you?" questioned Remus.

"I never said that."

"No. But, you may have thought it, Harry," retorted Remus.

"I never thought that. I just got angry and it just slipped out," replied Harry defending himself.

"Harry, Jamaila is in an awkward situation at the moment and you must understand that if you get her angry she might hurt you unintentionally," explained Dumbledore.

"I'm sorry I just didn't think, I was just angry," apologised Harry.

"Harry, it's not us you should be saying 'sorry' to. Go and bring Jamaila back in and can we please try keeping it civilised. No more shouting," replied Dumbledore politely.

"Okay,"

Harry got up and opened the door to let Jamaila back in, but Jamaila wasn't waiting outside turning around he said, "She's gone."

"What?" asked Remus in disbelieve, looking at Dumbledore with concern in his eyes.

"I said she's gone, as in not here, vanished," replied Harry sarcastically.

"Okay, Remus would you go and find her please. Harry, I suggest you get your anger under control while we wait," instructed Dumbledore.

Both Remus and Harry did as Dumbledore said. Harry managed to get his anger in check whilst Remus went in search for Jamaila.

***

Jamaila had been sitting for ten minutes when she thought she had better get back in, she stood up and began walking back to the castle lost in her own thoughts, I should never be this angry. I'm turning to be like my family. Oh, God forbid that would be awful, thought Jamaila.

She resisted the urge to use her telekinesis to get a broom and just leave. In the last two days she had managed to have an argument with at least a different house each day, it just gets worse, first you go down and then you never get back up, thought Jamaila miserably.

Half-way across the grounds Jamaila saw Professor Lupin walking towards her, meeting up with him she smiled slightly and he asked, "Why did you walk out after we had told you to wait inside?"

"I needed some fresh air," Jamaila answered glumly.

"You should have just told us you were going for some air, and we would have sent someone with you," explained Lupin.

"I needed to be alone for a while. Now, I suppose Professor Dumbledore wants to see me?" questioned Jamaila miserably.

"Why don't we go back inside and see?" answered Professor Lupin.

They headed back inside and made their way back to Professor McGonagalls office. They entered the office and Jamaila sat back down, no one spoke for a minute until Harry apologized by saying "Jamaila I-I' am sorry I shouted."

"Don't ever try to force me to fight, Harry because I might not mean to hurt you but I will and believe me it won't be very nice," explained Jamaila.

"I'm sorry okay?" repeated Harry

"Yeah you keep saying that, but I've had people tell me sorry all the time and they never mean it," explained Jamaila bitterly.

"Miss McGowan, Mr. Potter has apologised and he was indeed sincere," replied Professor Dumbledore.

"Fine," Jamaila sighed, nodding her head to Harry, "Apology accepted."

"Very well then you both may leave," replied Dumbledore.

"And no more fighting Harry," Remus advised Harry.

They walked back to Gryffindor tower in silence, Harry only spoke to give the fat lady the password 'Collywobbles' and they walked in.

"Jamaila, Harry, you're both back. I heard what happened!" exclaimed Hermione.

"Yeah you and the rest of the school," retorted Harry.

"Did you both get detentions or something?" asked Ron, frowning at the thought of detentions.

"No," they both cried in unison.

"Jamaila again I'm sorry," repeated Harry

"Yeah, well don't ever treat me like I'm some sort of enemy again, now I'm shattered I'm going to bed," replied Jamaila walking up the staircase to the girls dormitories.

After she got undressed Jamaila walked into the bathroom, looking into the mirror she noticed that her face looked awfully pale and sore, her eyes were showing a slight yellow tinge in them, pulling her night shirt across her shoulder she revealed the bite mark, it was still very slightly tinged red from dry blood, but it was just turning into a scar now with bruising around it. Sighing to herself she recovered her shoulder and went to bed.

***

Jamaila woke up Saturday morning to the sound of the door closing, opening her eyes she saw everything a lot better, even though it was still dull, as if she had just put on some glasses to make her eyesight better, then remembering what day it was she groaned, oh no and there's the Hogsmeade trip as well this weekend which will make everyone ask me more horrible questions, thought Jamaila.

Sighing to herself she got up dressed and went down to the common room. The common room was empty except for the first, second years and some older students that didn't like Hogsmeade, walking past them Jamaila walked out the portrait hole and down to the great hall for breakfast.

Upon entering she spotted Hermione, Harry, Ron and Ginny already sitting having some breakfast, walking over she sat beside Hermione.

"Morning Hermione, Harry, Ron, Ginny. How are you all this morning?" asked Jamaila.

"Fine. Sorry we didn't wait we, well Harry wasn't sure if you were still talking to us I mean him?" questioned Hermione.

"Okay, I'm going to tell you all something. Last night, Harry, you were an utter idiot to try to get me to fight you like a Slytherin or something. But, this morning is a new day and... and... and who ever is tapping stop it," exclaimed Jamaila glaring at Ginny who stopped tapping immediately.

"So does that mean you accepted my apology?" asked Harry hopefully

"Yes," answered Jamaila.

The other four all smiled at Jamaila and carried on finishing their breakfast's whilst Jamaila ate nothing, then the talk turned to the Hogsmeade trip tomorrow.

"So, Jamaila looking forward to the trip into Hogsmeade tomorrow?" asked Ron.

"Yeah, I guess so," Jamaila lied.

"You'll love it, I promise. It's great. All your favorite sweets in one day, it's perfect," explained Ron enthusiastically.

"Look, can we talk about something else? Food is making me feel sick," replied Jamaila.

"Oh sorry," apologised Ron.

"So, what do you want to talk about?" asked Hermione

"How about we go for a walk and you can tell me a little history about this place?" suggested Jamaila.

Hermione and Ginny agreed but both Harry and Ron declined, "We'd love to but we've got Quidditch practice. Sorry,"

"Do we? No one told me," asked Ginny

"Yeah, Ginny you should go practice. Well, see you all later, come on Jamaila," Hermione said, grabbing Jamaila arm and literally dragging her out the hall and into the crisp morning air.

They walked around the lake twice in comfortable silence until Jamaila stopped abruptly and said, "Hermione, my ankle!"

"What about it?" asked Hermione puzzled.

"Look, I can walk on it," replied Jamaila placing her foot onto the ground.

"But how?" asked Hermione seriously.

"I don't know, maybe my other self didn't want a bruised ankle?" smiled Jamaila.

"Must be," Hermione spoke cautiously, "How do you feel about tonight?"

"To be honest, I'm scared out my wits. I'm hoping to ask Professor Lupin something later," replied Jamaila honestly.

"You'll be fine, and unfortunately Professor Lupin isn't seen around until the day after," explained Hermione looking at her sadly.

"I know I'll... be.... Okay," gasped Jamaila, she had all of a sudden felt very short of breath with a digging sensation in her rib cage.

"You okay?" asked Hermione alarm settling in.

"Need to... sit down..." Jamaila replied, practically falling to the ground.

"Do you want me to go and fetch someone?" asked Hermione crouching next to her.

"No just... help me to... the hospital wing..."replied Jamaila.

Hermione helped Jamaila to her feet and supported her weight and began walking towards the castle again and into the hospital wing.

Hermione helped Jamaila into the hospital wing five minutes later, her breathing was returning to normal but the pain in her chest was constant now, they had met Professor Dumbledore on the way to the hospital wing, he had just spoken to Professor Lupin who had told him to check on Jamaila to make sure she was alright. Once inside the hospital wing Hermione led Jamaila to the furthest away bed and helped her to sit down.

Swinging her legs onto the bed Jamaila tried to relax whilst Dumbledore went to get Madam Pomfrey.

Hermione sat besides her and said "Don't worry, you'll be fine."

"You keep... saying that," whispered Jamaila.

"Because it's the truth, just rest," comforted Hermione.

Jamaila just nodded, Madam Pomfrey came towards Jamaila carrying a cup of something, sitting the cup on the bedside cabinet Madam Pomfrey said, "Jamaila I'll give you some pain relieving potion, in that cup by the side of you is half a dose of wolfsbane potion you don't have a choice on weather or not you want it you have got to take it."

Madam Pomfrey gave Jamaila a little phial of the pain-relieving potion, which she drank immediately, it took effect straight away and Jamaila was just left, with a little ache in her chest.

Then Hermione handed her the other cup, but Jamaila didn't drink it.

"Jamaila drink it, if you drink it you will feel better," encouraged Hermione.

"I don't want it," replied Jamaila placing it back onto the bedside cabinet.

"Jamaila you have got to drink it, as soon as you have drank it you can rest," explained Hermione a slight plead to her tone.

"No. You can't make me drink it. I want to transform naturally. Please, don't beg me to drink this." replied Jamaila.

"Miss McGowan, no one can force you to take it. Why don't you go back to Gryffindor tower and rest for the rest of the afternoon," suggested Dumbledore.

"Okay, I'll see you all later," replied Jamaila standing up.

When she stood up her legs felt like jelly and she was trembling slightly, making her way halfway across the room she stopped turned back around and said, "I'm sorry." And she carried on walking until she had left the hospital wing.

Knowing she wouldn't be able to sleep back up in Gryffindor tower, Jamaila made her way to the library, which would be empty on a day like this.

Walking into the library Jamaila walked to the back to an empty table and sat down, sighing she placed her head into her folded arms, I ache all over all I want is to curl up and go to sleep, thought Jamaila.

The warmth and quietness of the library made Jamaila feel very lethargic; closing her eyes for a minute she was instantly engulfed in a dream.

She was walking down to the living room, the house elf had sent for her, tapping lightly she walked in. Standing there was all her family staring at her with a glare. Her sisters were all smiling and kept repeating, "Squib! Squib! Squib!" in sing song voices.

She looked over to where her mother was standing hoping for a little support, but her mother just kept muttering, "Disgusting, disgrace."

Looking to her father she noticed her was also smiling, but not in the nice kind of way, he was smiling evilly and he said, "You are not welcome here. You have dirtied the family name. We must do something with a disgrace like you," explained her father, he then jumped and turned into the wolf and bit her shoulder again.

Waking with a start Jamaila looked up and saw madam Pince eyeing her suspiciously, I wonder how long I was asleep for. I guess I should leave before I'm thrown out, thought Jamaila smiling curtly at the librarian as she passed her.

Deciding it was best to see where Hermione had gone she began walking towards the grounds, halfway across the grounds her mind drifted back to her dream, Well I guess it proves my family never did love me, that was awful the wolf looked so real it seemed so real, thought Jamaila angrily, wiping away the stray tears that had escaped.

Coming to a stop outside the Quidditch pitch, it is enormous, one enormous stand for each house, and up in the air were seven players all clad in crimson Quidditch robes. Jamaila stood and watched the practice game for five minutes until someone tapped her shoulder turning around she saw Hermione.

"Is this where you'll be sleeping?" asked Hermione understatedly.

Laughing slightly she shook her head and said, "Nah, I actually fell asleep in the library,"

"The library? I don't even think Harry or Ron have done that," laughed Hermione.

"Well I did," sighed Jamaila, "Anyway I'm definitely going back now. I can't believe how much I ache," Jamaila replied.

They both walked back to Gryffindor common room, Jamaila was beginning to feel the wolf inside of her began to stir and it was starting to irritate her, and her temper was wearing thin. Her thoughts drifted back to the dream she had had in the library, family is such a stupid term, family to me is a curse, a horrible, disgusting, vile name, thought Jamaila emotionally, taking in a shuddering gasp she turned her head away from Hermione.

"Hey, you okay?" Hermione held both Jamaila's hands. Her concern touched Jamaila.

Nodding Jamaila answered quietly, "Yeah."

"Are you sure you're okay?" questioned Hermione, she still held Jamaila's hands.

"Just thinking is all," answered Jamaila quietly.

"Of what?" queried Hermione gently.

"Just a dream I had earlier," explained Jamaila, please don't ask anything else.

"Was it a bad dream?" questioned Hermione sympathetically?

"Stop with the questions," Jamaila snapped at Hermione who didn't look surprised at her display of 'unbalanced' emotion.

"Sorry," apologized Hermione.

Realizing what she had just said, Jamaila put a hand to her mouth, "Oh Merlin, Hermione I didn't mean to snap, it just came out."

"Don't apologize, I realised it wasn't you," explained Hermione.

Putting a smile on her face Jamaila began walking again. I shouldn't of snapped, damn you to hell, you blasted wolf. I should never have come I only upset people. Goddamn, I shouldn't have snapped! Thought Jamaila miserably.

Just before they got to Gryffindor tower, Lupin came up behind them and said, "I heard someone wanted to speak with me?"

Turning around Hermione pointed at Jamaila, "Jamaila."

"Hermione!" exclaimed Jamaila.

"What did you want to talk about?" asked Lupin

"Well, I'd like to ask something about...about tonight," whispered Jamaila looking at the floor.

"There's an empty classroom, just back down there if you want to use it?" suggested Hermione.

"We'll use that one. Come, Jamaila," replied Lupin

"See you later before...well, you know...when," Jamaila said.

They walked back down the hall to the empty classroom that Hermione had suggested; opening the door Jamaila walked in and sat herself down on a table. Closing the door Lupin walked over and asked, "What did you want to know?"

"Does the transformation hurt?" asked Jamaila quietly.

"Jamaila since it is your first full moon I think you should really consider taking the wolfsbane potion," answered Remus frankly.

"I'm not taking it," mumbled Jamaila, "I promised myself that no matter how I turn out. I will always just be myself, and nothing else,"

"Hmmm, I can't force you take it. Is there anything else you would like to know?" questioned Remus.

"Yes. I've got to honest, I'm sacred," answered Jamaila nervously.

"That's understandable. But, I can't say anything that will make it better," countered Lupin sadly.

"I know I'm going to transform into this werewolf, and everything, but it is the bit in between that I don't know and that scares me," Jamaila inhaled deeply as she confessed her fear to Professor Lupin.

"All I can suggest is to try to relax. I won't answer your other question. I wouldn't want you to get too scared and if you do fight the transformation it will take longer," replied Remus.

"I'll try. By the way, what time do I go down to the willow?" Jamaila asked.

"Go down to the hospital wing at half past five," answered Remus,

"Okay. See you tomorrow, Professor," replied Jamaila walking out the door.

Jamaila walked back to Gryffindor tower, I'm sacred witless and no one is willing to say something nice, lost in her own thoughts Jamaila walked straight into Hermione.

"Oh sorry," apologized Jamaila.

"I take it, Professor Lupin didn't help that much?" queried Hermione.

"Not much, I think I'll go up to bed to try to sleep, will you wake me around five please?" asked Jamaila climbing through the portrait hole, Hermione following her.

"Yes, of course," answered Hermione.

Mumbling her 'thanks' Jamaila walked up to the girls dormitories, walking to the door she heard someone say her name listening closely she heard Parvati Patil and Lavender Brown talking.

Jamaila didn't like Parvati or Lavender they had got on the wrong side of her by asking way too many questions and the result was that they had taken to gossiping behind her back.

"I heard Draco Malfoy say she comes from a dark family, but they kicked her out because she's a squib," came the voice of Parvati.

"Yeah, but Malfoy isn't always right," countered Lavender

"Trust me, Malfoy's right. Also, there is a rumour going around she got attacked," whispered Parvati.

"By what though?" Lavender wondered aloud.

"No one knows," answered Parvati and Lavender seemed deflated.

Lowering her voice, even lower Lavender replied, "You don't think it was you know, Professor Lupin?"

Before Parvati could answer, the door flew open and Jamaila was standing there with fury in her eyes and her face hardened as she glared at them. Stepping into the room both Parvati and Lavender backed further into the room.

"Well, well, well, you know you got more things right about me then a simple charms quiz," stated Jamaila hatefully.

"We didn't know you were there, sorry," rambled Lavender.

"Hang on, more things right about you. So you are a squib?" questioned Parvati confidently.

"No," answered Jamaila loudly.

"So you did get kicked out, and get attacked?" replied Parvati boldly.

Taking a deep breath to control her anger, Jamaila said, "I wouldn't trust everything Malfoy spits out his mouth, or listen to rumours because they could just land you in more trouble. Now get lost I want some peace and quiet."

Both girls ran from the room glad to get away. Sighing Jamaila sat down on her bed, Malfoy is an evil little brat, spreading things about me, and I'll get my own back, right after I get some sleep, thought Jamaila.

Lying herself down she felt exhausted, closing her eyes she felt sleep over power her and she fell into a comfortable light sleep.

***

Parvati and Lavender were sitting at a table in Gryffindor tower, waiting for Hermione to return from the library.

They didn't have to wait long as thirty minutes Hermione, Harry, and Ron walked into the quiet common room, as everyone was taking advantage of the last of the warm weather. Parvati jumped up and stormed over and asked, "Do you know what she has just done?"

Bewildered Hermione replied, "She has a name and no I don't know what she has just done, to make you sound so upset"

"She has just thrown us out of our own dormitory," Parvati said shrilly.

"Uh Hermione, what's going on?" asked Ron?

"Parvati, what did you do to upset her?" asked Hermione ignoring Ron's question.

"Nothing!" exclaimed Parvati indignantly.

"Well what were you doing?" asked Hermione?

"Just talking," piped up Lavender,

"Exactly what about?" repeated Hermione?

"Just some rumours that we had heard," answered Lavender quietly,

"Let me take a guess," interrupted Harry, "you were gossiping about the rumours and she, otherwise known as Jamaila heard you?"

"We don't know how much she heard but she was pretty angry," explained Lavender.

"Look Jamaila isn't very well at the moment, so just don't give her any reason to get angry also I wouldn't listen to rumours cause they are just that rumours," replied Hermione, lets just hope they don't find out some are actually the truth.

Parvati and Lavender both walked out the common room a bit miffed, Harry and Ron went and had a game of chess and Hermione sat reading a book.

***

Two hours later Jamaila was being shaken awake. Opening her eyes Jamaila saw Hermione looming over her, rubbing her eyes Jamaila sat up.

"Is it time already?" Jamaila mumbled groggily, she saw Hermione looking intently at her.

"Yes, come on you need to go to the infirmary," answered Hermione.

"Okay, just give me minute," replied Jamaila, getting up Jamaila grabbed her cloak and wrapped it around her for a bit of extra warmth.

Jamaila walked down to the common room in silence, not saying anything to anyone as she passed him or her. Jamaila and Hermione walked out the portrait hole and down the corridor.

"Hermione, can I ask a favour, please?" asked Jamaila rather hesitantly.

"Of course, what can I do?" Hermione asked?

"Would you do some research for me on the wolfsbane potion?" enquired Jamaila.

"Why don't you just ask professor Snape for the information?" Hermione suddenly had a nagging feeling that something was wrong.

"I don't know him, and as so many people seem to dislike him. I would rather do my own research, if you don't want to help me just say!" explained Jamaila impatiently.

"No, no I'll help," replied Hermione.

"Thanks," smiled Jamaila.

They carried on walking in silence. They reached the hospital wing ten minutes later, Jamaila was beginning to feel the pull of the moon and with her heightened, and very sensitive senses it was starting to become painful.

Walking into the infirmary Madam Pomfrey was already waiting for her.

"Miss McGowan you are to go and sit on the end bed. I will escort you to the Shrieking Shack in precisely thirty minutes," explained Madam Pomfrey leading her to the end bed.

Madam Pomfrey and Hermione helped Jamaila to sit down on the bed, making sure she was comfortable. Then, Madam Pomfrey left them alone to talk for a couple of minutes.

"You're going to be okay?" asked Hermione, rubbing Jamaila's back in consolation.

Nodding bravely Jamaila replied with a determined "Yes."

"I think I should I go then," answered Hermione but, she was still seated, waiting for Jamaila to say something more before she left.

"Okay. Hermione, umm...thanks for..." mumbled Jamaila, "your help."

"That's okay. Now, you best get some rest and I'll see you tomorrow after breakfast," replied Hermione smiling, she actually said 'thanks' finally something good has come out of this, thought Hermione, as she left the hospital wing.

Hermione waved and walked out of the infirmary. Jamaila smiled one last time before letting the smile turn into a pained expression.

Madam Pomfrey came back out after she had heard Hermione leave, carrying a cup full of the pain relieving potion. Walking over to Jamaila she handed her the cup. Jamaila, not wanting to be in any more pain, drank the potion down in one go.

"Thank you," Jamaila said, tried to smile of appreciation but it turned out as a grimace.

"You'll be leaving soon, just try to relax for a bit. I'll be back later," replied Madam Pomfrey, walking back into her office.

Jamaila lay back against the pillow and let the potion take effect, it better all be over soon, I hate being so uncomfortable, thought Jamaila drowsily.

Madam Pomfrey roused Jamaila fifteen minutes later from her semi-conscious state. "Jamaila, come on. It's time to leave" Madam Pomfrey said softly.

Turning to her right Jamaila asked groggily, "Is it time?"

"The moon rises in forty minutes, we need to get you inside the willow," explained Madam Pomfrey kindly.

Nodding Jamaila swung her legs over the side of the bed and stood up. Madam Pomfrey covered them both with an invisibility cloak and helped Jamaila to walk out the castle.

They made it to the whomping willow a couple of minutes later, touching the knot with a stick Madam Pomfrey froze the willow and ushered Jamaila down the hole and she followed in a minute after.

"Now, once you've closed the door you won't be able to open it again till morning. I shall be back shortly after the moon's gone. Just try to relax and let the transformation take place naturally; also try to refrain from hurting yourself. There's plenty of old furniture for you to break. Jamaila take care. I'll see you in the morning." Madam Pomfrey left Jamaila off at the door to the rundown house.

Jamaila pushed the door open and walked in, closing the door Jamaila realised that even in her wolf form, it would be quite impossible to break open the door.

Walking in Jamaila realised she was in some sort of lounge area, looking around Jamaila saw an array of battered broken and shattered pieces of furniture.

Jamaila was just about to go and have a look around the other rooms, when the first pains hit her, falling to her knees Jamaila gasped for breath. The pain eased up but was replaced by another wave of intense pain.

Rolling on to her back Jamaila began crying as another pain shot through her back, pain is... too much, thought Jamaila as she felt her spine curve over.

"AAARRRGGGHHH!" screamed Jamaila as her cloths started to rip.

Her muscles felt as though they were being ripped from the bones as her body lengthened, the bones felt as though they were being snapped and re-shaped, she managed somewhat a strangled cry before it turned into a howl and the wolf was let out and her world went black.

The wolf knew it shouldn't have been in here it wasn't its territory, it could smell that another wolf had previously been here, enraged that it had to be kept locked up it started to try to bang its way out of the shack, using its head and after a couple of hours of banging its head it knocked itself out.

***

Jamaila woke up in a comfortable bed. Opening her eyes she noticed it was sun shining, sitting up she felt very bruised and sore.

Madam Pomfrey who had been keeping a close watch on Jamaila, walked over.

"Good morning Miss. McGowan," greeted Madam Pomfrey smiling down at her pale patient.

"Humph! It may be morning but it certainly isn't a good one!" retorted Jamaila grumpily.

"I see you have your attitude back," reprimanded Madam Pomfrey, "You will be staying here until tomorrow, and you'll drink this." Madam Pomfrey handed Jamaila a cup of pain relieving potion.

Smiling a little too sweetly, Jamaila took the cup and drank the potion. Handing the cup back to Madam Pomfrey, Jamaila got herself comfortable and when she went to scratch her face, she noticed the bandage on her hand.

"What happened?" asked Jamaila lifting her bandaged hand up frowning at it.

"You cut it," answered Madam Pomfrey walking back to her office.

Oh thank you! I mean I honestly didn't want to know how I managed to cut it! Thought Jamaila sarcastically, closing her eyes Jamaila drifted off to sleep.

An hour later Jamaila woke and saw Hermione sitting in a chair by the side of her bed.

Smiling Jamaila sat up and asked "How long have you been sitting there?"

"Not long, how are you feeling?" queried Hermione sympathetically.

"Sore, aching, and in a bit of pain," answered Jamaila dully.

"You'll be okay, at least you're not arguing with everyone," pointed out Hermione.

"Hermione that kind of wasn't me who was arguing with everyone." she decided to change the conversation. "Do you know how Professor Lupin is?" asked Jamaila.

"He says he's 'been better'. Do you remember anything that happened?" replied Hermione enquiringly.

"Not much just bits and pieces I'd rather not discuss it," answered Jamaila.

"Harry and Ron asked where you were, I had to lie to them, I just said you weren't feeling well," explained Hermione obviously not happy with lying.

"If you don't like lying to them, I'll ask Professor Dumbledore to erase your memory?" Jamaila's spat the words viciously, as her nerves still haven't settled to normal.

Sighing Hermione replied, "I never said I'd tell them and I'll help you all I can. It's unnecessary to snap at me."

"Sorry," she apologized. "I'm still slightly uneasy after last night," explained Jamaila.

"That's understandable. I've got to go, I'll see you later or tomorrow," replied Hermione standing up.

"Uh huh, oh and Hermione take a coat if you go out into the grounds, its going to rain later," sighed Jamaila falling back to sleep.

Smiling to herself, Hermione left a copy of that morning's Daily Prophet and left to go to Hogsmeade with Harry, Ron, and Ginny. That afternoon it did indeed rain.