A Romance in Time

Chapter One: Love?

Harry lay on his bed at Hogwarts staring at the ceiling. He had so much on his mind, he didn't know where to start. As he was lying on his bed, he started thinking: In two months I will have to fight the most powerful wizard in the whole world. In two months I will have a fight of dignity and courage. Now that Dumbledore was dead, everyone was worried that nobody would be able to defeat Voldemort. However, what people didn't know was that Dumbledore couldn't defeat him, only Harry could.

In two months I might die. In two months Ginny might lose me. Now that I'm thinking about it, am I in love with Ginny? Do I really know what love is? As a child that never received love from anyone, I don't really think that I know what it is. I've never experienced love. Of course I had family, but I never had the chance to love them. The closest people who I could consider as people that I love: I have Hermione and the Weasleys, whom I consider to be family, yet I still fool around with Ginny Weasley; the youngest Weasley. Not all families are THAT close to each other. The third person is Sirius Black. He was my godfather; however I don't really know him. I think that I know my cousin, Dudley, better then I know Sirius. I didn't really like him in my third year. My fourth year he wasn't even around and I perhaps talked to him only five times that year. It was my fifth year I actually got to know him better, but then he died...

So I guess that I don't know how to love. That is a depressing thought... I was never in love or loved by anyone. It's not like I don't want to, it's... I don't know what it is.

Harry continued to think as he uneasily shifted in his bed every five minutes or so. He couldn't find the right position to fall asleep in. Was it his position that stopped him or his thoughts? Harry had decided to go back to school for the first two months to learn the truth behind his thoughts. Knowing this was knowledge needed for his final battle against Lord Voldemort, he could hardly sleep. Every night he had a different thought. For example, he often thought about what happened after death, or what would happen if he got shot by a muggle's weapon but he never thought seriously about any of these topics.

Maybe I should talk about It, But with whom? If I talked about it with Ron or Hermione they might get upset or mad. If someone really important to me will come and say I don't know love is and ask them what it is. I would get upset.

So I can't talk to Ron or Hermione. And I KNOW that I can't talk to Ginny about it, she would think that I didn't like her... and I don't really want that. Bloody hell, I like snogging her! And who knows, maybe later, I could do more than just that... Harry was stuck with his thoughts for a long period of time. Then he just stopped.

OK, OK, I have to stop thinking about what I can do to the girl... I don't want to explain why my bed is wet in the morning.

So I can't tell Ron, or Hermione and I can certainly NOT tell Ginny. And I think that I have to tell someone! I mean, it is just that I feel that if I don't tell anyone I will explode!!! Well I have an idea...maybe I should take Professor McGonagall's advice... about going to Mrs. Yoople.

Since Dumbledore had died and Voldemort came back, Professor McGonagall decided that it was best to have a school psychologist to handle all the crises that happen in the school. And just as usual, people thought that Harry needed help. So Professor McGonagall advised him to go to Mrs. Yoople, the school psychologist. However Harry is Harry, and he refused to go there. Until now...

Maybe it is not a bad idea, for me to go to talk to a psychologist... maybe she will give me good advice about what I should do about my problems and the war. It would help me to think about what I should do next, not just in the war but with my other problems too.

After a while, Harry fell asleep.

As Harry woke up, in the Head Boy's bedroom, he knew that he was going to go to Mrs. Yoople that afternoon. However first he had to tell Ron and Hermione that he couldn't be with them that afternoon.

As he arrived at the Great Hall for breakfast, a lot of students (especially first years) came to him and ask him weird questions. Such as: "Harry, are you still going to play Quidditch?" That question was asked mostly from the Gryffindor boys. Or "Harry is it true? Did you really dump Ginny and then get back together with her?" This was the question that was asked by Gryffindor girls. Or the one that was most common asked by Slytherin students, "How was it? You know, watching Dumbledore die?" Or the one from the Ravenclaws students: "What curse are you going to use to defeat 'you know who'?"

However his favorite one was from a second year Hufflepuff: "Are you going to kill 'him' with your wand or with a poison?"

Along with the weird questions that all of these Hogwarts students asked him, he eventually found his usual seat. This seat was in the middle of the Gryffindors' table, Ron on the right, Ginny on the left and Hermione in front of him. As he, somehow got to sit down, the first thing that he heard was Hermione and Ron fighting... again.

"How could you say that, that Yoople person can help me? I am not the one who needs help! You are! I mean I am not the one who spends their free period in Library," said Ron, almost spilling his pumpkin juice.

"Wait, you think that I need help? I'm sorry but I am not the one who prefers to snog every whore in Hogwarts. Last time I checked, I got an 'O' in almost every subject, and you were the one who didn't get any 'O's in your report." Hermione was becoming rather angry, and began using hand gestures in compensation.

"ALMOST every subject." Ron reminded her, "Besides, so what if I want to spend my free time with other people? Why do you care?" he said, raising one eyebrow.

"You know what? I DON'T care! I don't care how you spend your free time, but in the final battle, I won't care either, even if you forget how to save yourself." Hermione got up, took her books and left the Great Hall.

For the whole time, Harry was confused as always. He never really knew why Hermione and Ron fought with each other. Ginny always told him that the only reason that they fought was because they loved each other. But then again, at the moment Harry didn't really know what love was.

After Hermione was out of sight, Ron started talking to Ginny and Harry.

"Did you see her? How could she? She thinks that I need to set MY priorities. Look at her, she hardly has any social life. And she actually had the nerve to tell me that I need to go to that Yoople person," fumed Ron.

However, both of them weren't really listening. Instead, Harry and Ginny were having a conversation of their own.

"Good morning darling," Harry whispered into Ginny's ear. As he did that, Ginny started to smile. "What are you smiling about?" Harry just had to ask.

"I'm just smiling... why can't a girl just smile at her boyfriend? I didn't know it was against the law," said Ginny, trying to hide her cheerful smile. Harry laughed and ran his hand through her beautiful, long, thin, straight hair. As he did that, Ginny moved her face a little bit closer to Harry, so his lips were barely a centimetre from her nose. However, before they got to kiss, someone interrupted them.

"Oi! Are you lovey dovey people there? I'm still here. Please Harry, next time you want to kiss my little sister, do NOT do it in front of me, or anywhere near me," said Ron loudly, with one hand on his hip and the other holding a slice of bacon.

"Sorry mate, if you don't want to watch, you can just go," answered Harry, meekly.

"Ron, can you please stop being so protective, I mean Harry's your friend, you should trust him just a little... he won't do anything stupid like last time... trust ME, your innocent little sister," said Ginny, with a little smirk.

"Alright, alright, just please say your bloody good mornings to each other, when I LEAVE the hall. Please... as a favor for my little sister and my best friend," Ron begged.

"OK mate, then can you leave the hall FAST, because I want to say 'morning to my beautiful girlfriend'," said Harry, and then just turned his head back to Ginny, so that he was facing her lovely smile.

"I'm leaving! Let me just pack my books..." said, Ron, as packed his books and left the Great Hall with a horrified look on his face.

As Ron left, Ginny laughed for a second and then looked back at Harry.

"Why did you stop?" Harry asked.

"Stop what?" Ginny answered in a sarcastic voice.

Harry looked close into her eyes, leaned a little closer to her, and then gave her a small, light, kiss. As he kissed her, he could feel her lips smiling, so he took that opportunity to sneak his tongue into her mouth. But instead of kissing him back, she broke off the kiss and said, "Let's have a picnic, just us. Please, we didn't really have any time alone in a while."

"Sorry, but I can't. I'm going to see Mrs. Yoople,' answered Harry.

"WHAT?! Why? Are you OK?" Ginny said, with a surprised and confused face.

"Yeah I'm OK. I just need help seeing things a lot clearer. There is nothing to worry about. I promise," replied Harry. Although he promised, Harry never liked to promise anything that he didn't know whether he would fulfill.

"Are you sure? You know, you can always talk to me."

"I know. But there are things that I can't really talk about with close friends cos I'm afraid they'd take it in the wrong way."

"So you see me as just... a close friend?" Ginny asked with a sad face.

"You see, this is a perfect example why I can not talk to anyone that I'm close to. And of course not! I don't consider you to be my close friend. I consider you to be my girlfriend."

That sentence made Ginny turn her sad face into a smile, so this is how Harry knew that it was safe to kiss her in that moment. He gently raised his hand to her chin and kissed her.