Embarrassing Secrets

One-sided Conversations

While Harry and Ron were in the Gryffindor common room, waiting to go to the Great Hall for dinner, Hermione was up in the girls' dormitory, once again her mind filled with the clutter of the last two days' events. She had left Potions class in high spirits, her friends, at least, had noticed.

"What are you on about?" Ron had asked bluntly.

"Excuse me?"

"Ron has a point, what's put you in such a good mood? Snape snapped at you during class, and now you look happy? Are we missing something?" asked Harry.

"Oh, nothing," she had said. "Looking forward to dinner I guess, and I might stop by the Durmstrang ship and say hello to Viktor."

And now she was putting her Potions supplies away in her dormitory. She heard light chatter behind her, coming closer, and she knew her roommates Lavender and Parvati were probably coming up to pack their supplies away, too. Hermione didn't feel like hearing the daily gossip the two friends so often filled her in on, so she took her time pretending to look for something in her bag that wasn't there, until Lavender and Parvati had headed out of the room and back down the stairs.

She straightened a few things on her bedside table, and smoothed out the blankets on the mattress of her four-poster. She wandered over to the window, and looked out at the grounds below. She saw Hagrid playing around with Fang through the window of his hut, and smiled. She also saw the flawless Fleur Delacour, one of Harry's competitors in the Tournament, wrapped in her winter coat and muffler, giggling with her bundled up little sister, and frowned.

I'll never be that pretty, she thought to herself. Maybe that's why Ron doesn't notice me. Why should I have expected him to, anyway? He'd never ask his best friend to the ball when someone like Fleur is strutting around Hogwarts. And she smiled again, this time in spite of herself. I can't wait to slip Ron that potion tonight. He'll notice me one way or another. Yet again, however, she frowned. She was feeling a bit sick with herself, laughing at how her horrible plan was about to humiliate one of her best friends. But she still decided to go through with it. She compromised with herself that she would try her best not to be pleased with herself when the effects of the potion are in full flow, or at least, would not laugh in his face. If she could help it.

Hermione realized embarrassingly that her forehead had become stuck to the window, and her breath had fogged the glass. She unstuck her forehead and wiped the glass clear with the back of her sleeve. She saw the Durmstrang ship floating peacefully on the Black Lake as snow began to coat the grounds outside. Fleur and her sister had retreated into the warmth of the castle her other best friend called home. Harry. She hadn't even given a single thought to Harry the last two days. I hope he isn't angry at me for last night. When the ball was over, I was so mad at Ron, I started snapping at Harry. I hope he forgives me for being so rude. What did Harry think anyway, when Ron and I were arguing? I shouldn't have been arguing with Ron. I should have been talking to Harry. I know he was upset when Cho turned him down.

And what about Viktor? I know he still likes me, but he might not now, since I sort of abandoned him at the Ball. But I like Ron! I did have a very nice time though, and I should remember I was the one sneaking peeks at him in the library. And then Ronald went and spoiled my whole night, just because he was mad at Viktor and me. She scowled at that thought. It still bothered her a lot. Enough to remind her of the potion she had waiting patiently in the pocket of her robes. Why was he so mad at me? I never did anything to him, there was no reason for him to go and act all...jealous. Oh, that must be it. Wait, Ron was jealous, is jealous, of Viktor and me? Then he might like me, too...

"Hermione, are you still up there?" Harry's voiced echoed up the stone stairs that she was grateful boys could not step on. She had lost track of time, sitting on the window ledge, having one-sided conversations with herself.

"I'm coming, sorry guys." She answered. As she tramped down the dormitory steps to meet Harry and Ron before they left for dinner, she lightly tapped the pocket of her robes, making sure that her form of revenge on Ron was safe. She took a deep breath as she walked out of the portrait hole with her two best friends, wishing to herself in her mind that her freckled friend would forgive her for what she was about to do.