Snape Rules

6. First Lesson

"Nice to meet you."

"The feeling is not mutual."

Tonks was only a bit taken aback by that statement. 'Grumpy one, aren't you? Just you wait, Severus, just you wait. I'm gonna getcha ...' - "Remus said that my chambers are next to the former DADA classroom in the dungeons. Would you show me the way?" she asked, opting on just ignoring his rudeness.

"What made you think I was going to let you stay, Ms. Tonks? There is no way I'm going to let my authority being undermined. You are leaving Hogwarts. Now," Snape snarled, pointing towards her luggage. "Take your trunk and follow me."

"I don't think so."

"W-what?" he stuttered slightly. How dare this little klutz deny him?

"Minister Fudge assigned me with this mission. I have to report everything directly to him ... I'm not sure you'd want me to tell him that Dumbledore left without a word and conferred his position on you," Tonks said, looking rather smug, even though she lacked the height in comparison to Snape.

"I'm not going to let myself be blackmailed!"

"Oh, no, no!" she hastily assured. "I wasn't going to blackmail anyone! It's just I can't leave Hogwarts without Fudge knowing. How should I explain my early departure? You'll just have to live with it."

Snape ground his teeth angrily. "Very well."

"Oh, don't look that way!" Tonks snorted, punching Snape in the arm. "It makes you look like two hundred years!"

This only caused his brows to crease even more. "Who said I'm not already more than three hundred? I'm a pureblood, after all, how would you know?"

"Touché!" Tonks laughed, while Snape merely quirked one eyebrow. Had he said anything funny? He didn't think so. "The next DADA class is this afternoon, isn't it? Oh, if you didn't know I was coming ... ehm, you do know that you're supposed to be also in the class?" At the murderous look on his face, Tonks took a cautiously step backwards. "I guess not."

~+#+#+~

It hadn't been an easy task to bring Snape to comply. Why should he help Lupin of all people? It was ridiculous, really. Lupin was so shy and tried so hard to avoid confrontations, but what did it help him? If Snape had to learn he should be in the DADA classes for the next two weeks on his own accord, Lupin sure had more to endure than if he had told him in the first place. Oh yes. Snape would see to it. He did help with the defence against dark potions, after all, didn't he?

This same afternoon, the DADA classroom saw three more or less qualified teachers.

While Hermione, Harry and Ron congratulated themselves for their fabulous plan, Remus began to do paperwork.

"Well, I am Tonks and going to show you how to defend yourself against dodgy potions stuff. I guess that's it, shall we begin?"

Snape smirked evilly. At first there was going to be a practical demonstration. He'd already picked out the trickiest of his potions. This would be fun ...

"As you all are able to see ..." Snape drawled, pointing one sharp finger towards Tonks, who struggled to breathe. She was cocooned in a web of slimy but also firm threads, which were steadily drawing closer to her body, strangling her slowly. "... this is not the right way to touch a potion you are not familiar with."

"Snape? Would you please do something? Tonks ... well, she looks a bit blue around the nose ..." Remus murmured worriedly towards the Potions Master. But not only the werewolf was worried, every student started to express their concern.

Snape sighed but pulled a small package out of one of his many hidden pockets in his robes. He plopped one 'sky-wave' into Tonks' mouth. She chewed the bubblegum and then her ribcage extended as she could breathe again. The threads of dried potion ripped, falling to the ground. "Wow ..." she said in awe, making a bubble and letting it burst with a loud 'bang'. "This was rather interesting ... What else do you have for us, Severus?"

"It's 'Snape' for you!" the Potions Master hissed.

"Sorry, Se- Snape," Tonks giggled sheepishly.

~+#+#+~

"What do you guys think?" Hermione asked, plopping down onto the sofa.

"There were sure tensions between the two of them," Harry said, thinking of how Snape seemingly tried to kill Tonks at least twice in one DADA lesson. "Definitely tensions ..."

Ron nodded in mute agreement.

"I suppose we have to help a little bit more." Hermione scratched her chin. "But how?"

"We could beat him with his own weapon." Two pairs of eyes turned towards Ron, who raised his brows. "What?"

"That wouldn't be fair."

"That wouldn't be ethical."

"That wouldn't be easy."