Take the Wizards Bowling

Crash! Minerva McGonagall snapped shut the tartan biscuit tin closed suddenly with force. Mad Eye Moody was up on his feet in a flash, grabbing a poker from the fireplace as he went. Dumbledore looked inquisitively from over his copy of Smash Hits.

"Yes, Minerva?" he asked before turning to Moody. "Alastor, I don't really think that we should worry, please, sit down."

Moody looked at his seat as if it contained a hidden trap and glanced around the room before slowly taking his seat again.

"Well," said McGonagall, excitedly, "we have been working so hard over the past few weeks and thought that it would be beneficial to let our hair down."

A broad smile spread across Dumbledore's face. Moody took a slug from his drinking flask.

"What did you have in mind, Minerva?" Dumbledore asked.

"Well, I was thinking about ten-pin bowling".

Moody raised the eyebrow from his normal eye.

"Always fancied a bit of that," he said, "I know that you're very keen, Albus."

"Indeed I am, Alastor. I discovered it during the business with Aberforth. I find it rather thrilling. We shall have to invite Arthur Weasley - I've always said that he'd enjoy it, with his love for Muggles and their lives."

"Then it's decided," said McGonagall, opening her biscuit tin again and taking a piece of shortbread. "Is everyone free Saturday night?"

*

Under the red, neon sign that sported the words 'BOWLING UNI ERSE', Dumbledore, Moody, McGonagall and Arthur Weasley waited patiently.

"Any moment now," Arthur said, excitedly.

They were stood about ten feet away from the glass entrance to the bowling alley and were just close enough to read the words 'AUTOMATIC DOORS'.

"Are you sure about this, Weasley?" Moody asked impatiently. "They are Muggles, you know."

Suddenly, Arthur made a shushing gesture and pointed at a group of Muggles approaching the door.

"Watch!" he whispered, the look of delight sweeping his face like a flannel.

The doors slid open and the Muggles walked inside, without so much as slowing down. Arthur was almost incoherent with delight.

"Ha! You see? I saw the same thing happen at one of their so-called 'supermarkets' last week."

"How can you be sure it wouldn't take your arm off?" asked Moody.

"Alastor," replied Dumbledore, "they are Muggles, not idiots. I am sure that they are made to be safe."

"Do you think we could get inside now?" asked McGonagall. "Though I agree that the Muggle device is ingenious I am getting rather cold stood out here!"

They all agreed and went inside. Arthur repeated his entrance a few times, uttering words like "marvellous" and "super" each time the doors slid open.

*

"There you are," said Dumbledore, handing them all a ticket, having returned from the desk, "for your shoes."

"Come again," said Moody, suddenly looking and staring at Dumbledore.

"When the Muggles come bowling," Dumbledore explained, "they have to wear special shoes to prevent the floor becoming worn and damaged. As very few people have such shoes - including us, Alastor - they provide them."

Moody looked at Dumbledore, then at the desk, then at McGonagall and Arthur and back at Dumbledore again. He took a deep breath.

"So let me get this straight," he said through his teeth, "I have to wear someone else's shoes?"

"Yes."

Moody took this in for a moment.

"That a Muggle has already worn?"

"Yes, Alastor."

"Oh," gasped Moody, his blue eye spinning wildly underneath the sunglasses that he was wearing as part of his Muggle disguise. "May I ask you what will happen to my shoes? May I remind you that I keep things in them? You think that I'm going to be in a situation where I don't have some mimbulus Mimbletonia weed on me? You think I'm mad?"

"I think," said McGonagall, smiling wildly, "that their muggle police would have something to say about you having some weed concealed in the heal of your boot, Alastor!" Moody looked at her and scowled. His gaze fixed itself back on Dumbledore.

"Alastor," said Dumbledore, his eyes twinkling, "they look after your shoes and give you them back after you have finished with them. I you assure they will be well looked after. And I doubt you will be in a great need to stun anyone during the duration of game, unless you plan to cheat of course."

"If it's a fair game you are after then I will give you one Dumbledore," Moody barked, tugging his boots off. "Just because I won't show you up doesn't mean that I can't".

He stepped up to the counter and slammed his boots down. The Muggle member of staff looked surprised.

"Erm, what size sir?" he asked, cautiously.

Moody glared at him, suspiciously.

"He's a seven," Dumbledore interjected, placing his own shoes onto the counter, "and I'll take a pair of tens please."

*

"Honestly, Alastor," McGonagall said, exasperated, "you lost fair and square. I think that you are making too much of a big thing of this."

"Oh yes, I can see what's going on here," Moody replied. "You probably had all of this planned out before we even decided to come. Well, I won't have it."

"Alastor," said Dumbledore, "I explained to you on the journey here that the idea was to knock down as many of the pins as you can, not leave them standing."

"Well, I certainly don't remember any conversation like that."

Moody pulled his boots on and began pacing around. McGonagall leaned in to talk to Dumbledore.

"Well," she said, "at least Arthur seemed to have a good night".

"Yes, Minerva, he did. I'm not sure that the people in the lane next to us did though. He does love to ask Muggles questions."

"Yes he does," McGonagall said, with a smile. "Where is he now?"

"He said something about going to the 'arcades', or some such thing. We really must be getting along though - it's getting late and I fear that I may miss Changing Rooms."

"Arm wrestle."

They looked up and saw Moody standing over them, smiling a toothy grin.

Dumbledore smiled back at him and said "Well, if it will make you happy, Alastor, we can try that later," gave a knowing look to McGonagall and walked them both to where Arthur was stood next to a gambling machine, slack jawed, eyes burning with excitement.

"Oh," he said, "this is amazing! Look, you put money inside, press these buttons and then take money out. I'm not sure what the point of it is yet but people seem to enjoy playing it. Someone even asked me if I had any tips, though I'm not sure that he appreciated my advice of checking to see whether a fireplace is open or electric when visiting people that you don't know."

"It's all hokum if you ask me," snarled Moody, "Much like Dumbledore's sense of fair play."

The four wizards stepped through the doors (Arthur letting out a high, excited whine as he did so) and towards the sapphire blue Ford Cortina that was parked at the edge of the car park.

"Well," said McGonagall, thoughtfully, "I thought that was a fine evening."

"And," said Arthur, almost panting, "a real glimpse into Muggle life. I could open a whole new investigation about this at the ministry. In fact, I think I will, first thing Monday morning."

"The evening will only be complete," barked Moody, "after I have beaten Dumbledore at an arm wrestle. It's only fair."

"Yes," replied Dumbledore, "I think that Alastor is right. But first, I think we all need some hot chocolate." And with that they all climbed into the car and began the journey back to Grimmauld Place.