Shattered Mirror

Chapter 3 - The Letter

Lamps lit immediately when Harry walked through the door, giving off far more light than normal lamps would have. Harry looked around. He'd expected a dusty, neglected house, but in actual fact, it was quite clean and comfortable. There were obviously quite a few charms at work to maintain it.

Harry was standing in a hallway that went straight back into the house and ended in a door. Two large rooms sat on each side of it. A stairway led up to the first floor on the right side of the hallway. On the wall opposite the stairs was a large painting.

Harry walked slowly over to it. It was a painting of Hogwarts. It was exquisitely drawn, but all Harry could really see was how it had looked when last he had seen the castle. The place that had been his home for six of the last seven years was a battlefield, and the castle had sustained heavy damage. Harry wasn't sure he could ever remember it any other way. What drew Harry's attention the most was the white marble tomb that was absent from the painting.

Harry walked back toward the front door and looked into the room to his right. It was a large sitting room. There was a very comfortable looking couch and some chairs around the fireplace. Everything was brightly colored. There were some more paintings on the walls, and the large picture window looked out toward the front of the house. Harry looked out and saw Hermione pacing by the fence, wringing her hands nervously. He really wished that she, that everyone, would stop worrying about him. He wanted Ron and Hermione and everyone else to move on with their lives.

Two windows looked out the side of the house at the plants and flowers growing on the cave wall. Between the windows was the fireplace. Harry looked at the mantle above it. There was a large clock in the shape of a phoenix with a large mirror behind it. Harry stared at his reflection for a moment, but all he could see was the lightning bolt scar on his forehead.

In two weeks he hadn't had so much as a twinge in his scar. The pain had been transferred to his chest and become an unyielding dull ache.

There were several framed photographs on either side of the phoenix clock. They were of Professor Dumbledore and his family. They were pictures of happier times, when Professor Dumbledore was a boy, before violence had torn his family apart.

Off to one side of the fireplace was a golden perch. Fawkes had obviously accompanied his master to this house.

The rear wall of the room had an archway that led into the kitchen. Beside the archway was something that Harry hadn't expected. There was a very large television set. It was only now that Harry noticed several electrical outlets on the walls. There was certainly electricity here.

Harry chuckled and shook his head in disbelief. Leave it to Albus Dumbledore to have a Muggle television in his home. Harry could almost imagine him sitting in this room watching the television, being fascinated by a Muggle football match or some scientific study of something or other.

Harry left the living room and crossed the hallway to the dining room. Much like the living room, it was decorated in bright colors. A large chandelier full of candles hung over an ornate polished wood table. There was a centerpiece in the shape of a phoenix upon the table. Professor Dumbledore certainly did like phoenixes.

Another large picture window looked out over the front yard. Hermione was now sitting in the grass leaning against the fence. It was quiet warm, but she had her arms wrapped around herself as if she were cold.

Harry turned away from the window and turned his attention to a large china cabinet with glass doors. It stood against the rear wall of the room beside another door. Harry walked over to it and peered inside.

The cabinet was filled with a set of goblets, a set of sterling silver utensils, and a large set of dishes, plates, and accessories. Each item had a phoenix on it, continuing the theme of the house.

Harry went through the door beside the china cabinet and emerged into the kitchen. It was spacious. Unlike the cramped kitchen at the Burrow, it could have fit a dozen people comfortably around the large table that sat in the middle of the room. There was a large sink in the counter in front of a long window that overlooked the rear of the house. There was a large stove and an oven. The kitchen was brightly decorated like their rest of the ground floor. Phoenixes were prominent. There was a large refrigerator, which made the whole kitchen remind Harry a lot more of a Muggle kitchen than a wizarding one.

Through the window above the sink, Harry could see a lawn stretching back thirty yards to the rear wall of the cave. It too was covered with flowers and plants and made it look even more like a tropical garden than the front of the house. There were more flowerbeds and several large trees provided shade from the simulated sun. A white gazebo sat in the middle of the backyard, surrounded by flowerbeds.

For just a fleeting moment, Harry thought it would be so wonderful to spend a warm summer evening sitting in the gazebo with Ginny in his arms. He could almost feel her lips against his. The thought only lasted a moment though, and was gone as quickly as it had formed.

To Harry's surprise, there was a large in-ground swimming pool in the backyard. Harry didn't think he'd ever heard of a Wizarding home having a swimming pool. Harry grinned slightly. If any wizard would put a swimming pool in his home, it would be Albus Dumbledore. Somehow Harry was sure the water would be just the right temperature all year round.

There was a door that led to the backyard from the kitchen, as well as one leading to a basement. Harry took a quick look in the basement, but didn't find anything interesting. It was just used for storage.

Harry returned to the hallway and headed up the stairs to the first floor. There were five rooms there, but none contained any furniture. They were quite large and could have easily been used as bedrooms. The walls were all painted white. Professor Dumbledore likely never had any need for them and, as such, had never bothered to decorate them.

Harry continued up to the second floor where he found the master bedroom. It was decorated very much like the ground floor with bright colors and paintings. There was a large four-poster bed with a scarlet and gold bedspread and nightstands on both sides of the headboard. It looked like a very comfortable room.

There were quite a few photographs on the walls. All were Wizarding photographs and their occupants were moving. Some were waving while others were posing for pictures.

Harry recognized many of the people in the photographs. There was a picture of a young Albus Dumbledore with an equally youthful Elphias Doge. He saw a picture of Hagrid and one of Professor McGonagall when she was much younger. There was a picture of Professor Dumbledore with Mad-Eye Moody before he got his magical eye.

Harry noticed a large photograph on the nightstand beside the bed. Unlike most of the other photographs, which were in simple frames, this one had an ornate scarlet and gold frame. It was obviously important to Professor Dumbledore. Harry sat on the edge of the bed and picked it up. He looked at it and his heart stopped.

The picture was of a wedding. Professor Dumbledore was performing the ceremony. His parents stood before Professor Dumbledore holding hands with their fingers intertwined. Harry watched Professor Dumbledore smile and wave his wand in the air. A shower of silvery stars fell upon James and Lily, some spiraling around their intertwined fingers. They turned to each other and kissed, then the picture started over again. Beside James, at the front, stood Sirius as best man; Remus and Peter Pettigrew were stood by Sirius, both beaming like the other members of the photograph. Professor McGonagall, Hagrid, Frank and Alice Longbottom, and other members of the Order of the Phoenix were there.

Harry had a photograph in the book Hagrid gave him whilst in his first year that was taken after his parents' wedding ceremony. This was the first time he had seen anything from the actual ceremony.

Harry willed himself not to cry as he watched his parents get married over and over again. He was sure he probably couldn't have cried if he wanted to. Harry was sure he was out of tears. What little time he had to himself over the last two weeks was mostly spent crying for the dead. Harry could think of little else but the trail of bodies he'd left in his wake. He couldn't help but notice that most of the people in the photograph were now deceased.

Harry held the photograph in his hands for a few long minutes. He was about to place it back on the nightstand when he felt something on the back of the frame. He turned over the photograph and found an envelope stuck to the back. Harry Potter was written in emerald ink on the envelope and the handwriting was unmistakable. Harry took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He removed the letter from the envelope, unfolded it, and began to read.

Dear Harry,

If you are reading this, then it is over. Tom Riddle will never hurt anyone again. The world is a much brighter place now, Harry. The world has you to thank for that. Whatever you do, never forget that.

I'd like to say I'm sorry, Harry, but those words seem so hollow. I put you through so much, and I know you must have gone through a lot more since my death. I wish so many things could have been different for you, Harry. I wish it could have been my destiny and not yours. If I could have spared you from all of it, I would have. I am truly sorry.

I can't know what losses you have suffered, Harry, but this is war, and it would be foolish of me to think I am the last person you know who will die. I know how much the deaths of your parents, Cedric, and Sirius weigh on your heart already. I know my death will weigh on you too. You blame yourself. You are the only one who blames you. While I don't know whom else you'll lose, I know none of them will blame you for it.

We can never forget the dead, Harry. The people we have lost stay with us. Our memories of them keep them alive in our hearts. Remember the dead, but be careful not to live among them. Too easy is the temptation to let our grief consume us, to forget the living people who care for us. Remember the dead, Harry, but live among the living. That's where you truly belong, and where you truly want to be.

This house belonged to my parents. Over the years, I fixed it up when I had time. I never really made use of it, except during the summer. In recent years I haven't returned very often. The magical enchantments will last for many years to come, and I'm sure that if they weaken then Miss Granger will be able to restore them. Put this house to good use, Harry. Make it a home. If I may be presumptuous, I think Ginny will love it. I think it would be a wonderful place to raise a family.

I have asked so much of you, Harry, but I am afraid I have two last requests. In the study, you'll find an old friend. Please take care of him for me. He'll take care of you too. You're his master now.

There you'll also find an item you are familiar with. You'll know what to do with it, consider this my last request. I tried many times to do it, but I could never bring myself to do what needed to be done. I wasn't strong enough or wise enough to do it. You are a far stronger and wiser man than I, Harry, and that's really saying something.

Sincerely,

Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore

Harry closed his eyes as a few tears leaked out from under his eyelids. Apparently he wasn't out of tears just yet.

Even from the grave, Professor Dumbledore was trying to help him. Almost all Harry had thought about for the last two weeks was the dead. His parents, Cedric, Sirius, Professor Dumbledore, Mad-Eye Moody, Hedwig, Dobby, Professor Snape, Colin, Fred, Tonks, and Remus had all died because of him. All he wanted was to see them again. All he wanted to do was to tell them how sorry he was, how he would trade places with them in a heartbeat if he could. His heart ached to see them again.

Harry opened the mokeskin pouch and looked at the items inside. He had shrunk most of them so they would all fit. The shard of Sirius' mirror was inside the pouch, along with a photograph of James and Lily. The pair of socks that Dobby had made him for Christmas in his fourth year and the Golden Snitch from his first Quidditch match that Professor Dumbledore had left to him was in the pouch as well. There was a picture of Cedric Digory, clipped from an old copy of the Daily Prophet, a picture of Mad-Eye Moody, taken from a much more recent issue, and a few Canary Creams left over from what Fred and George had given him for his seventeenth birthday. He had a vial that contained the memories Professor Snape had given him before he died. An old essay that he had written for Defense Against the Dark Arts class in his third year was also inside the pouch. Remus had written 'O - Well Done!' on the corner. The model Firebolt that Tonks gave him for his fifteenth birthday was in there, along with a photograph that Colin Creevey had taken of the Gryffindor Quidditch team. One of Hedwig's feathers that Harry had found in Ron's room at The Burrow was in the pouch too.

Whenever Harry was alone, he would open the pouch and just stare at these reminders of the dead. He would stare at them through his tears during the night, wishing he could crawl inside the pouch and never come out.

On the rare occasions when he wasn't thinking about the dead, he thought of the living and how much suffering he had caused them. He could see loss in all the Weasleys' eyes for Fred even though when he was around, they never let on how terribly painful Fred's loss was.

Andromeda cried so hard for Tonks and Remus at the funeral as she held Teddy in her arms. Poor Teddy was an orphan, and would never know his parents

Harry could hear Mrs. Creevey's sobs as clear as the day Colin was buried. He would never forget the blank look on Dennis Creevey's face as he stood over his elder brother's grave.

Hermione and Ron had finally admitted how they felt about each other. After all this time, they were together and they should have been happy. Harry knew very well that when Ron and Hermione went off to be alone, that most of the time Ron was crying for his brother on her shoulder. Ron didn't want to cry in front of him. After all they had suffered these last seven years, Ron and Hermione couldn't even be happy.

Then there was Ginny. He loved Ginny so much. He had been in love with her for longer than he even realized, but how could he tell her? When he looked at her, he could only see the pain her brother's death had caused her. Harry knew he was responsible for that pain. How could she ever forgive him for that? How could he ever forgive himself?

Professor Dumbledore wanted Harry to live among the living, but how could he? He had hurt them so much, even more than he had hurt the dead. He belonged among the dead. Professor Dumbledore was wrong. Harry did want to live among the dead. Where he truly wanted to be was inside that pouch where he could never forget those who had lost their lives for him.

Harry slipped Professor Dumbledore's letter inside the mokeskin pouch and closed it. He placed the photograph of his parents' wedding back on the nightstand.

A door led into another room. Harry knew what was in there. Professor Dumbledore's cryptic description of what was in his study wasn't really that hard to decipher.

Harry stood up and walked slowly to the door. He took a deep breath, then turned the handle, and pushed open the door.