Can't Decide to Love or Hate You

Ginny hastily pushed her red hair out of her eyes so she could read her book, only she was staring at him instead of looking up information in the library.

She knew that her last words to Draco were cold and shallow, but she didn't quite understand why he was keeping his distance from her for the past two weeks. She never thought it was possible to stay away from one person for so long, one that she was so used to spending her time with, but it was. When he wasn't avoiding eye contact during meals, he was brushing past her in hallways without even a glance. People started talking, asking Ginny if she and Draco broke up, or what was going on between them.

She always responded with the same small smile, answering that they have both been very busy lately with their own lives. How was she supposed to answer them if she herself had no clue what was really going on? Sure, they shared some harsh words the last time spoke, but this was Draco Malfoy. When did they not have a fight or two?

Ginny sighed loudly as she closed her book, knowing that there was no way she would be able to concentrate with her mind racing like it was. She instead studied Draco who was two tables away. She took in his posture, which was perfect as usual, and watched as he scribbled down notes. Not once did he look up at her, even though she was certain he knew she was there.

If she knew what to apologize over, she would have by now. She was certain she did something very wrong to upset Draco this much, but she did nothing out of the ordinary. Even though it was hard for her to admit, she misd having his company. He may be a spoiled brat, but he always did make her smile, something she hadn't been able to do lately.

Finally having enough, Ginny quickly gathered her books and marched over to Draco's table, stopping right next to his seat.

"Draco, we need to talk," Ginny blurted out, hoping that he would respond to her.

"Can't you see I'm busy, Weasley?" Draco answered in a low voice as he continued to write.

"So it's back to Weasley now, is it?" Ginny asked as she settled her books onto his desk.

Draco's writing stopped, but he continued to stare at his book. "What other way would it be?"

"How about the way when you called me Ginny, would talk to me in the hallways, and risk our lives by making a presence in front of Ron?"

"And why do you want it that way?"

Ginny slowly shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. It just feels better than this."

Draco slowly turned his eyes away from the book and to her. Ginny's heart dropped at the hard look in them. "This? This is reality. I am a Malfoy, you are a Weasley. We're not supposed to call each other by first names, talk, or even be seen together. All of that was a silly little plan you created just to get back at someone you supposedly hated. So are you telling me that you want something that is a lie?"

"I-I," Ginny stuttered, not expecting that at all. "I didn't know that all of it was just pretend to you."

Draco shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly before going back to his book. "Wasn't it to you? I mean, all this time you were still in love with Potter, and you pretended you weren't."

"I never did that, Draco," Ginny said with sudden stern. "Why would I have asked you for your help if all along I was still in love with Harry? Why go through all of these plans to hurt him and make him angry if I was still in love with him?"

"Because you're a woman and you like to play with our hearts."

Ginny opened her mouth to yell at Draco, to tell him that he was not being fair to her, when she paused and took in what he said. "Our hearts?" Ginny asked with suspicion. "Whose hearts are we talking about here?"

Even though Draco's face was not looking at her, she could just make out his eyes widening at his choice of words.

"Draco?" Ginny asked quietly. "What's really going on here?"

An awkward moment passed between them, so awkward that Draco could not even keep his cool. He quickly stood up from his seat and hastily slammed his book shut. "This discussion is over, Weasley," he muttered as he packed his bag.

"My arse it is," Ginny spat as she grabbed Draco's arm to prevent him from leaving.

Stopping at her contact, Draco slowly turned his angry, gray eyes onto hers once more. "If you know what's good for you, you will rese your filthy, mudblood loving hand from me."

Ginny gasped at his words, and quickly let go of him as if she was burned. This wasn't her Draco. This was the Draco she feared for years, the Draco that bullied her and everyone she loved.

Draco turned his back at her to leave, but stood still for a quiet moment. "Whatever was between us is over," he spoke in a calm voice, never once turning to face Ginny. "As of now we go back to how it used to be. It was easier that way."

Ginny's heart instantly dropped. Before she could even get in a word, Dracuickly walked out of the library with his black robes billowing in threat. Just like they use to before Ginny came into his life.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Ginny stared at the fire in front of her in a daze. Another dinner passed when Draco completely ignored her presence, and after the fight they had earlier she just could not take it. No longer having an appetite, she excused herself from Riley and Colin, and immediately went to her favorite chair in the Gryffindor common room. And here she found herself staring off into space and only thinking of him.

Why the sudchange in him? How could he just instantly forget about all the time they have shared together, for whatever purpose, and act as if it never happened? He turned a complete 180 on her and completely left her in the dark. She kept on back tracking to what caused him to turn on her, but could not put all the pieces together. Something was missing. He was hiding something from her, and she wasn't going to rest until she knew what it is.

She heard the common room entrance open, and sighed quietly at the thought of everyone returning from dinner. She was about to sit up when she saw it was just Ron.

"There you are, Gin. I've been looking everywhere for you. Why did you leave dinner so early?"

Ginny slowly shrugged her shoulders as Ron took a seat right next to her. "Just wasn't hungry. Why have you been looking for me?"

A big smile appeared on Ron's face, and suddenly Ginny didn't want to know. "Ginny, have I ever told you that you're my favorite sister and I'm sorry for ever doubting you?"

Ginny rolled her eyes at her brother whose arm was draped around her shoulders. "One, I'm your only sister, and two, what do you want?"

Ginny narrowed her eyes at Ron, whose face resembled a child on Christmas morning. "And when was this?"

"Earlier in the library. It was about time, really," Ron said as he ranted on.

"Ron, Draco and I are still together," Ginny said out of habit. Her heart dropped a little, knowing that she was also lying to herself. She just couldn't tell Ron yet that her and Draco are over, even if they were never really together.

Ron's face immediately fell. "But-but you two have been so distant lately, and Padma saw you two having some sort of row in the library, and-"

Ginny sighed quietly while patting his hand lightly. She felt sort of bad for Ron, him having to deal with the idea of his baby sister with his worst enemy. "That's all it is, a bit of a row. You and Hermione fight all the time, but you two are still friends."

Ron quickly shook his head, frustrated at hearing her news. "But that's different, Gin. Hermione and I are just friends. Malfoy just wants to get in your pants."

Ginny's mouth dropped open. "That is not true! How can you say such a thing?"

"Why else would he be with you, Ginny?" Ron nearly screamed. "Why else would Malfoy be sticking with you all this time, having to deal with all this crap, if he wasn't doing it just for sex?"

"Maybe it's because he actually likes me!" Ginny yelled as she stood up in rage. "Maybe Draco is with me because he actually cares for me, and wants to be with me for me! Maybe," Ginny paused quickly, a look of realization of her face.

"Oh my gosh," Ginny whispered to herself, completely ignoring the looks on her brother's face. "Maybe that is it."

"What is it?" Ron barked impatiently.

Ginny looked over at Ron in disbelief. "Draco Malfoy likes me."

"That's the problem, Gin!" Ron yelled, completely missing the look on her face. "Malfoy likes you, or wants to get in your pants, or whatever his intention is, is the problem. Now all you have to do is make him go away, and all is good in the world."

Without responding to his remark, Ginny quickly headed towards the common room entrance.

"Hey!" Ron called after her. "Where are you going?"

"I need to talk toaco," she said quickly. "I'll see you later."

Ron watched his little sister walk out of the common room, well aware of where she was going, and for the first time didn't stop her. A wide smile crept over his face as he relaxed more into the couch. "About time she listened to me," he said as he wandered off into a daydream where Malfoy did not exist.