Hope

~Two Candles~

Flames licked the air, a vibrant orange banner proclaiming holiday cheer to all. Two sat in front of one girl, alone, at the furthest corner of the Slytherin table. Alone, not because no one would sit with her, for she had a few friends, but because she chose to be. The holiday spirit seemed not to reach her as it had the others.

"Still ruddy cheerful about Voldemort's defeat," she muttered softly, shaking her head so that the two shoulder-length messy brown braids of her hair flipped behind her back. Sighing, she leaned back over her books, glancing at the pages as her braids flipped back over in front of her shoulders. Only a few months had passed since the death of her friend, and though it still hurt, she had managed to move on. She had to be strong, for Lily. Lily would have wanted it that way.

The days had passed as they always did, although the teachers seemed to be a bit more lenient due to the good cheer of Voldemort's defeat. Despite him being gone he was still referred to as "He who must not be named" by most. Cowards. Meg didn't care. She would bloody well call him Voldemort. He held no fear for her, only anger. He deserved everything he had gotten, and no one felt that more strongly than she.

That's not what most people thought, though. A Hufflepuff had passed by her earlier, talking to his girlfriend about the whole incident, and after seeing her, his face had contorted with disgust.

"I'll bet she grows up to be just like him," he'd whispered.

She ignored him. She'd learned better than to listen to their taunts. Not all of them were bad. In fact, a good many were not, but there were quite a few members of the other houses who seemed to believe that all Slytherins were destined to become Dark Wizards. All Slytherins were just like Voldemort. She'd show them. She'd show everybody.

Aidan was forgotten over the past months. She no longer cared that her uncle never seemed to recognize her talents, that she never once heard a word of praise for good test scores. That wasn't important. What was important was proving herself to be different. She wasn't a Dark Wizard, she wasn't Voldemort, and she wasn't biased like every other student at Hogwarts seemed to be at times. She was going to make a difference.

And so she glanced back down at her book. Sirius Black. She didn't know why the thought suddenly hit her, but the tears formed in her eyes almost immediately. Sometimes she thought that learning how to cry had been a bad thing.

Sirius. She'd never expected him, of all people. She'd known him, he'd been friends with James and Lily. Him and Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew. Now Peter was dead too, and Sirius had killed him. It didn't seem possible. She'd been told, after she'd gotten out of the forest, the whole story, mostly by catching whispers amongst the other Slytherins. She still couldn't believe it, though. Sirius. He was such a nice guy for the most part, if a bit troublesome, and Meg had found she rather liked the older boy. She couldn't believe him capable of such a thing.

And now their whole group was split apart. All of them gone. Peter and James and Lily were dead. Sirius was off to Azkaban, and Remus...Remus had just disappeared. Nobody knew where -he'd- gone. That worried her, because she liked him too, but she didn't dwell on it. He was a big boy and could take care of himself.

She'd never really been a part of the group, and hadn't particularly wanted to. She was content to watch them, to have Lily help her with her homework, and to enjoy the knowledge that somebody, at least, could truly live life. They'd been so vibrant all the time. So real. She got goosebumps thinking about it now. Just like the candles in front of her, they had been alive and well and beautiful.

"Little Meg studying up on the Dark Arts?" she heard a taunting voice behind her. She stared down at her book. Best not to give them a reaction of any sort. Ignore them and they'd go away. Ignore..ignore.

"Betcha she's got the whole book memorized already," another voice chipped in.

That one bit to the core. She recognized that voice, Justin Maberly, a boy from her own house. Slytherins were supposed to stick together. The first seemed to have quieted, and that made her think it was likely a Gryffindor who didn't want to be seen agreeing with a Slytherin.

"I don't study the Dark Arts," she whispered softly, her voice barely audible.

Justin laughed, clapping her on the shoulder, and in the process snuffing out the two candles that were sitting by her,

"Good one, Meg, almost had me fooled. Everyone knows you're going to be a Death Eater."

She bit her lip, turning to face him. She had to stick up for herself. She couldn't just let them think...People were staring. There weren't many who were stuck at Hogwarts for the holidays, and those that were...well, now they were all staring at her, expecting some sort of confrontation.

"I don't..."

Justin glared at her icily,

"Of course you do. Stop denying it."

She bit her lip harder, wanting to draw blood. She wouldn't snap at him..she wouldn't. She had to keep calm, keep her head. Why was he doing this? He knew as well as everyone else that she'd been effected by James and Lily's death. He knew she didn't practice the dark arts. He -knew-!

"Leave her alone."

She looked up to see her defender, and nearly dropped her jaw.

"R-Remus?" she stuttered, "W-what are you d-doing here?"

The man glared at Justin, growling softly,

"Go." he said simply, and her fellow Slytherin scowled,

"I'll talk to you later, Meg," he said in a very unpleasant tone that sent shivers down her spine.

Remus growled a bit more as he waited for Justin to leave, then turned his attention back to Meg, his expression softening visibly,

"Come on," he said, taking her arm gently and scooping up her books,

"Come with me."

She quickly got to her feet, following him wherever he was leading her. He still hadn't answered her question, and she still wondered where he'd been, but she trusted him. Remus had never done anything to wrong her, and she had no reason not to believe that whatever he was up to was perfectly safe. He led her out of Hogwarts, out of the castle, and guided her towards the lake.

"They're gone," he whispered softly as he sat down on a bench looking out at the waters,

"Can you believe it?"

Meg wondered briefly why he was sharing this with her, of all people. Why he was discussing this with her, and why he was here on Christmas day when he obviously had somewhere else he could be. Somewhere he'd been for the past two months almost since Lily and James were killed. She folded her hands in her lap, not daring to question him,

"Not really," she said softly, her voice wavering,

"I...I miss them."

Remus smiled at her, although little joy was held in that smile. There was only the slightest bit of comforting warmth in it, and he touched her shoulder gently,

"I do too...Meghan...do you want to know why I'm here?"

His words were tentative, and he didn't look her in the eyes. She watched him for a second. He was slightly attractive, even she had to admit, with soft brown hair that curled a bit above his ears, and light brown eyes to match. And he'd always been the quieter of their group. James and Sirius were the pranksters, and Peter...well, no one really thought much of Peter. Meg rather felt that he'd hung out with them for similar reasons to herself.

"I was rather curious," she conceded quietly, wanting to continued, wanting to tell him that there was no reason for him to be here, but obviously, if he was there was a reason...And her thoughts were running in circles.

"I wanted to say goodbye. It is unlikely I'll ever see you again, Meg. You've been a friend to me, and I thought I owed you that much," he finished by standing up, and offering a hand,

"I'm going to be going my own way for a while. I don't know if I'll be able to keep in touch. However...if you ever need me, don't hesitate to send an owl."

The girl was rather taken aback by all of this, but managed to mask this rather well, taking his hand and allowing him to help her to her feet. She could agree to his request, of course. She'd never actually -do- anything, but she could tell him she would. Slytherins never had a problem with lying, and she especially didn't if it meant that someone would feel better for it.

"Of course," she told him, "I will. I hope you find what you're looking for."

He hadn't said anything about looking for something, but his demeanor told her as much. Looking for answers, probably: Why Sirius did it, why Voldemort killed them, why Harry lived, and looking for peace, looking to come to terms with their deaths. At least, she knew that's what she wished -she- could do. It occured to her that he had known that she wouldn't ever call on him. He'd said, 'It is unlikely I'll ever see you again'. Maybe he knew her better than she'd thought.

The tall man hugged her very softly, then turned,

"Goodbye, Meg."

She stared after his departing form for a moment, then whispered softly,

"Goodbye, Remus."

The last of her ties to Lily were gone, and there was an emptiness inside of her as she made her way into the dining hall again, picking up her two candles. She stared at them for a moment, then almost laughed. Snuffed out. Just like Lily and James' lives. Gone. Sometimes the ironies in life were just too much to take.