You Were too Young to Die

Chapter 10

CASSER LA VOIX

( Break your voice )

Lily took her head with her hands :

" No ! For God´s sake ! You know, James, I begin to hate this Bartemus Crouch ! "

James asked from the kitchen :

" Why ? What happened ? "

" Crouch has still clamped down ... He has interviewed Hagrid under caution. "

" Why ? "

" The giants joined Voldemort. Then, necessarily, Crouch accuses Hagrid, half-giant, under Dumbledore´s permanent surveillance, from being with the Dark Lord. According to him, it is logic. "

James came to join his wife on the sofa.

" Dumbledore told you that, didn´t he ? "

" Yes. And the trial takes place next week, on the 30^th of July. Dumbledore wants us to push away our holidays to be able to be present during the trial. "

" I suppose we will be witnesses ? "

Lily was staring into space. Finally, she resumed :

" I know what I will do... I will stand up for Hagrid... "

Si ce soir

J´ai pas envie d´fermer ma gueule

Si ce soir

J´ai envie d´me casser la voix

***

James walked in front of Lily, looking for two free places on the seats of the court. When he had found, he waved to her to come to sit down.

She was hot, it was on thirty in July and the baby began to move. As to reassure him or her, she put a hand on her womb. Waiting for the beginning of the hearing, she went through the room by the glance. She recognized Dumbledore, some rows behind : she waved to him. There was Sirius too, who ran up, late as usually. James got up to draw the attention of his best friend and him a free seat beside him. Lily had no time to notice another one she knew, the hearing began.

***

When Hagrid appeared in the dock, Lily shivered with anger.

How could Crouch suspect Hagrid ?

J´peux plus croire

Tout c´qui est marqué sur les murs

J´peux plus voir

La vie des autres même en peinture

***

Rogue was sitting right at the back of the court.

He had come only for her.

To see her.

To hear her.

To know how she would defend Hagrid.

To savour the moment he would survey her green eyes, shining with anger.

To feel the indignation she would exude.

To observe her ginger hair, waving slightly when she would pronounce the speech which should save the gamekeeper.

He woke up from his torpor, hearing Crouch pronouncing these words :

" I call Madam Lily Potter to conduct the case for the defence of the one we already consider as a culprit. "

Snape cursed Crouch. Crouch, still so sure of him, still contemptuous, so eager to be able to dominate, still shattered the young lady´s plea.

Les amis qui s´en vont

Et les autres qui restent

Se faire prendre pour un con

Par des gens qu´on déteste

Snape transfered his attention to her. He saw her leaving her seat, approaching the platform and standing in front of the public. He surveyed the womb, sighing. The baby would certainly be born next week.

Then, he heard her voice.

Still so clear and musical but imbued today with a touch of determination.

He smiled.

***

" First of all, I would like to remind Hagrid's status. Hagrid, the half-giant. Hagrid, the gamekeeper at Hogwarts. And it´s enough for the ministry of Magic, not to say for his Minister, to condemn Hagrid for Azkaban because he, according to him, would have collaborate with the Dark Lord. Why do you accuse Hagrid rather than another one ? Because the giants joined Voldemort, then, according to you, all the giants are guilty. Because, and especially because of that, you want to demonstrate to all the magic community that the ministry is active, that it begins offensives, that it takes measures, that it condemns ! Because the Ministry of Magic knows that to dampen the wizards and witches´ fear and tension, it needs culprits. It is necessary that it dominates these culprits, that it locks them...

Et ces flashes qui aveuglent

A la télé chaque jour

Et les salauds qui beuglent

La couleur de l´amour

... But have you thought, Minister, that condemning innocents wasn´t necessarily the best solution to reassure the wizards ? Have you thought that deceiving people would not benefit you eternally ? Have you thought that by your behaviour, you´ve done the same as another wizard, a dark wizard like Voldemort, not to quote him ? Indeed, condemning innocents to the perpetual confinement and to the frustration is worse than kill them ?

Et les souvenirs honteux

Qu´on oublie d´vant sa glace

En s´disant j´suis dégueu´ !

Mais j´suis pas dégueulasse !

...I have a last thing to say. I would not like being the one who will condemn Hagrid this evening. I would not like being the one who will lock an innocent in Azkaban this evening. I would not like being the one who will push the bars of one of the cells of the jail this evening, knowing that behind is the victim of a fight of influence. In fact, I would not like being Bartemus Crouch this evening. Neither this evening, nor never. "

Et les chansons qui viennent

Comme un cri dans la gorge

Envie d´crier sa haine

Comme un chat qu´on égorge

Lily kept silent, exhausted. She had put all her energy in this plea. She had felt strong, merciless. But now, she was so frail in front of the cold anger of Crouch, in front of the murmurs of approval or disapproval of the audience, in front of Hagrid's tears, in front of James´s smile, in front of Sirius´s raised thumb.

The baby moved and kicked her.

She sat down with robot-like movments, trying to calm the baby who hurt her. James put his arm around her shoulder :

" You have been great ! "

Doucement les rêves qui coulent

Sous l´regard des parents

Et les larmes qui roulent

Sur les joues des enfants

***

Snape followed her by eyes. She seemed tired. But she had been great. She had put anger, some determination, and harshness in her speech. Staring at Crouch, he saw that she had won.

Crouch would not condemn Hagrid.

***

Dumbledore had smiled hearing the words " I would not like being Bartemus Crouch this evening. Neither this evening nor never. ".

That´s just like Lily. He felt; so proud of her.

She would do great things, Lily.

***

Voldemort was in the room.

Nobody would have recognized him.

Before the hearing, he had observed the crowd and had smiled. All these people who shivered when somebody spoke of Voldemort didn´t know and would not know that the subject of their fears was behind them.

But now, he didn´t smile any more.

He had seen her, and had been captivated.

She had shown so much stubbornness. He liked stubborn people.

And she was so beautiful. More than the other one.

With her, he would never have the impression of being dominated. She seemed frail and unassuming.

But who was she ? Crouch had named her but he hadn´t heard.

However, he thought he had already seen her...

Then, he saw that she was pregnant and everything seemed clear in his mind.

Naturally.

She was Potter´s wife.

A Machiavellian plan took shape in his mind.

He would kill Potter and his son. And her, he would take her. He would do as he had done with Rachel and she would love him.

He smiled, looking at her, for the last time before leaving the court.

It would be one thousand times better than with Rachel...

***

Lily squeezed James's arm whispering :

" It hurts, Jamsie... "

" The baby ? " James asked, worried.

" Yes " she answered in a breath.

Not giving a damn about what the people was staring at him strangely, he carried her and left the court.

Si ce soir

J´ai pas envie d´rentrer tout seul

Si ce soir

J´ai pas envie d´rentrer chez moi