Just a Girl

October 18, 1995

    It's me again. I wasn't planning on continuing to write in this diary, but now that I've re-read my last entry, I think I'd better clear a few things up. I'm going to write in this diary as if it were another person, and I would need to explain to another person, so here goes.

    My name is Hermione Granger. I'm fifteen, bushy-haired, flat-chested, and ugly. The only thing I'm good at is being smart, and as I said before, that isn't going to get a girl anywhere in the world. I'm depressed at the moment, partially because I recently broke up with my boyfriend, Viktor Krum, and partially because I'm afraid my grades are going to start slipping if I don't get my act together.

    Even Professor McGonagall has noticed. She called me into her office today, and asked me if there's anything wrong. I told her no, there wasn't. It's just like using the Time-Turner all over again. I'm falling apart!

    Today Ron was staring at me in Charms again. When will he give it up? I don't like him, and snapping apart action figures of my ex-boyfriend isn't going to make me. Then Professor Flitwick called on me and I realised that I hadn't been paying attention. Was my face red. I shudder at the thought of going back to Charms and having people laugh at me as if I were . . . Neville.

    Oh, Neville's okay, and all, I guess. But he's still not a very good student and people still laugh at him a lot. I hate having to pretend to be wonderful and like everyone and nice and everything. I DON'T like Neville. Or Dean, Lavender, Parvati, or . . . ////////////

    Okay, I guess since you're my diary and it's not like anyone else is going to read this since I magically locked it . . . I don't like Ron. I'm not in love with him and I don't like him as a friend. Everyone thinks I do, but I really don't. He's such a slacker, and . . . I don't like him.

    Well. Okay. Maybe I do.

    I don't know, diary! My whole life is so confusing! Why did I have to be a witch anyway? Why couldn't I just have been born a Muggle and not have those strange things happen to me and not get WHISKED away to a wizarding school!

    I sometimes feel like I love life and everything's going my way. Other times I want to commit suicide.

    It just isn't fair.

    I've got Potions now. OH MY GOD!! I FORGOT TO DO MY ESSAY!!!!!

    Oh, God, I just said a really bad curse word out loud.

    Professor Snape is going to kill me . . . I forgot to do my essay . . . I wish I still had the Time-Turner . . . then I could go back, do it, and take it back to the present so . . . .

    But that's impossible.

    What am I going to do? My essay . . . oh, God, I'm in so much trouble, he's going to give me a DETENTION, or at least kill me!

    Oh, Lord, and now I'm late!

    I TOLD you I'm falling apart!!!