Just a Few Simple Emotions

Just a Few Simple Emotions

Harry Potter: Obsession's Curse

By: Lance Walker

There once was a time when I thought everyone in the world was inherently good. Evil was truly a mutation of what every person was born to be in the world, and thus could be deleted from existence as easy as curing a disease.

After watching the wizarding world (and much of the Muggle world) go up in flames thanks to the machinations of Voldemort and his army of dark wizards, I realized that evil was something that was always and would always be part of humanity.

But that wouldn't stop me from doing my best to end it.

During my Hogwarts days, and during the third Voldemort war when I discovered my true powers as the Bright Shiner and the evil counterpart to me, Voldemort, was finally defeated once and for all, I became obsessed with the thought of the destruction of evil.

This was a time in my life where love and friendship were readily available and at my call, but I chose to shrug it aside for the "betterment of the world." I viewed myself as a sacrificial lamb before the fires of evil, but I would be a roaring lion when the time came. I would see evil fall at my feet and beg for its life, only to be silenced by the flick of my wrist and the whisper of a spell.

Avada...

However, I realized that this obsession to destroy evil was in itself tearing through the relationships and happiness in my life and devouring them as well.

..Kedavra.

My friendship with Ron has survived the turmoil, but only because he needs me now more than ever. Hermione and I have also grown closer, albeit she had been out of my life for years, presumed dead, until only very recently.

My love with Cho, however, has been most affected by the ebb and flow of obsession and this damn war. It feels gone, sucked from my body and replaced with this burning pit of hatred for evil. This absence of love has led me to realize that, perhaps, I am not as pure and true as I have dreamed.

Perhaps I am no better than the Death Eaters who have fallen to my wand and my vengeance.

I may have won a war, but at what cost to myself? The powers of the Bright Shiner only shield me from the darkness so much...I always told Cho:

"The closer you are to light...the darker your shadow grows."

Perhaps, as Bright Shiner, I have the darkest shadow of them all. I am to be feared if that is true. Feared by all who love and hate me.

I find some solace in the thought of my daughter. She is due any day now, and I'm hoping, to some extent, that she will draw Cho and me closer together. I hope she will rekindle the spark, as Cho says, of love within me so that I may find it somewhere in my tormented soul to rise above the darkness and embrace a light beyond reckoning: the light of love.

Light and love are two things I desperately want...no, need in my life. Every day I allow the obsession that has driven me for months to take control is one more day down a spiral leading to my own destruction. I was warned by the Gaea to look out for the dark spiral...but I obviously didn't know what it meant until now. I always believed that by doing the "right" thing and fighting evil, I would be on the righteous path.

But as they say, the road to hell is paved with good intentions, and my grandiose intentions had me heading to hell on the Gringott's bank mining cart.

So, I'm left now, praying to the Valor for the light to enter me, and the Bright Shiner side of me to guide my actions. Now that I know a darkness exists, in tandem with the light, I know how to control my obsession and defeat its curse.

Perhaps I'm writing this in remembrance of the wars I have fought, both within myself and against the world, but I think, more so, I'm writing this to warn myself against the curse.

Obsession...will tear at your soul and leave you a dying husk of vengeance and pain.

Pray to the Valor that it shall pass by you and leave you in the peace and harmony of love and light...

Harry