Tying Knots

Chapter Three - No Knot Unties Itself

Hermione was awakened rather abruptly just over a week and a half later; a rather disgruntled owl zoomed into her room and, very unceremoniously, dumped a scroll on her head. Without even waiting for her to respond, the huge tawny owl spread its wings and zoomed out of the room and down the stairs. Crookshanks, whom Hermione had Apparated home to retrieve the previous day, rose from his place at her knees and hissed at the retreating bird before settling back to sleep.

"How rude," she muttered sleepily before hoisting herself into a sitting position to read the scroll. She noticed, with a great sinking of her stomach, that the large red wax seal bore the "M" insignia of the Ministry of Magic. In a moment of childish fear, she crossed her fingers and prayed that it was only the agreed-upon proposal from Neville.

She realized with a jolt that if it was in fact the agreed upon proposal, she would need to wish both Neville and Harry a happy 18^th birthday. 'Rather convenient,' Hermione thought as she let out a breath at the sight of Neville's slightly lopsided scrawling signature, 'that his birthday should fall right on the day where I need to buy some time ...'

She reminded herself, also, to thank Neville heartily for putting himself in harm's way simply to help her. It was truly chivalrous of him, and she firmly intended on expressing her gratitude. As she was pulling a T-shirt over her head, it also occurred to her that she needed to speak to him on another topic as well.

Her thoughts on this buzzing in her head, she sped out of her room only to collide with him on the landing below. "We need to stop doing that," she said ruefully, rubbing the elbow that had hit the wall in the collision.

"Oh," he said, massaging his side (where her other elbow had hit), "you don't think we should make this a tradition?"

She smiled, but felt it dissolve from her face as her thoughts returned to their previous occupation. "Neville, I didn't know about your parents. I'm so sorry."

He was quiet for a second or two as they moved down the staircase. "That's all right. I suppose it's ... well I can't say it's better, but at least they're ..."

After a moment of silence, Hermione offered, "At peace?"

Neville teared up and turned his face away, but nodded in response.

"Oh, by the way," she said as they worked their way to the kitchen, "Happy birthday, and you're officially seeking my hand in marriage."

He smiled and blushed nervously as she held up the ministry-sent proposal. "What a way to celebrate! Congratulations, you're of-age, here's a fiancée."

Hermione laughed heartily as they sat down at the kitchen table, accompanied by several more members of the Order of the Phoenix than she had seen presenting previous vacations. Tonks and Remus were once again talking over coffee, joined by Kingsley Shacklebolt and Bill Weasley, who were in the corner near the fireplace, engaged with Harry in a heated discussion of the merits of the most recent broom in the Nimbus series.

Hermione scanned the room. She was actually surprised - why, she couldn't imagine - at the absence of Professor Snape. In previous years he had been constantly absent, to the point where he was only present for meetings; but in the last six months, since the threat from Voldemort had heightened, it was not uncommon to see him breezing in and out of Grimmauld Place.

Mrs. Weasley was bustling about the kitchen, foisting breakfast on anyone who stopped talking long enough to look hungry. Hermione smiled and accepted bacon, eggs and coffee and seated herself next to Tonks and Remus, who seemed to be having the most joinable conversation.

"I tell you, Remus, you should go back. What does it matter now that you're a werewolf? They need someone who knows what they're doing! Especially now!"

He sighed heavily and nodded a greeting to Hermione. "It will matter a great deal once word gets out to the greater public that I could eat their children once a month. Besides, I heard that he offered the position to you."

Hermione raised her eyebrows in surprise, and Tonks turned to include her, brushing her shoulder-length, neon green hair out of her eyes. "Defense Against the Dark Arts teaching position at Hogwarts. Dumbledore's offered it to me, but I still think that Remus should apply for it."

"Oh well, I would love to have Prof- Remus back, but I can see his point." Lupin leaned back in his chair, smiling triumphantly at Tonks. "Well, if you've been offered the position, I'd say that'd be quite beneficial, having an Auror at Hogwarts. Very safe."

"That's what I said," Remus finished smugly. "Besides, with all this new Ministry interference into the personal lives of students, it might not be a bad idea to have a member of the Order at Hogwarts. Just in case."

Though Remus hadn't said anything to that effect, when his gaze lingered just a touch longer than usual on Hermione, she couldn't help but feel that he was referring to her. Hermione sighed heavily.

"My engagement is already causing problems and I'm not even engaged yet. Not really," she responded glumly. "I can't even imagine what's going to happen when school starts." Turning directly to Remus, she continued, "Has Dumbledore thought of anything better for us to do about my proposals?"

He shifted in his seat, looking distinctly uncomfortable. "Erm ..."

Hermione watched him expectantly, and somewhat curiously. Remus was not someone who was normally speechless. In fact, when she was his student, she had believed firmly that he had a thought-out answer for everything. This would explain her admiration for him.

"Yes?" she prompted.

But just as Lupin had opened his mouth to form a response, Harry bounded over and plunked down on the bench beside him. "So, how are we all on this fine morning?"

"Well," Tonks replied, "aren't we chipper for being of-age now?"

"Happy Birthday, Harry," Hermione offered as Harry helped himself to breakfast. Harry nodded his thanks and set forward to consuming his meal.

"Cheers," he said, around a mouthful of toast. "Best birthday I've had so far."

Tonks chuckled heartily, and Hermione piped up, smiling, "Harry, it's only 9:30."

"Says something about all those birthdays I've spent at the Dursleys, eh?"

It hadn't occurred to Hermione right away, but with Sirius gone, Grimmauld Place must rightly belong to Harry, being the closest thing to kin that Sirius had left. 'Aside from the Bellatrix Lestrange, of course,' Hermione reminded herself. 'But one could hardly expect her to jump at the ownership of the house.' After a few moments of silence unbroken except for the clatter of cutlery, Hermione spoke.

"Aren't you worried about the petitions now that you're 18?" she asked, unable to control her concern any longer.

"Not really," Harry said after a long pause. "I've done so many stupid things, and so many people think that I'm crazy that I doubt that many people will even be interested. I think all of that 'famous Harry Potter' nonsense has finally worn off."

"Thank goodness," Remus replied and everyone at the table laughed heartily.

"Either that or they figure that marrying Harry is like signing a death warrant," Ron chimed in, having just caught the end of the conversation as he sat down to breakfast.

"Ron!" Hermione hissed, but Harry just shrugged.

"Either way works out for me," he added, helping himself to more eggs.

****

The bustle of 12 Grimmauld Place was consumed with preparations for the approaching term at Hogwarts. Not only were preparations being made for Tonks to take over as Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, but Hermione had been notified that she would be assuming the position of Head Girl. Dumbledore had been in and out several times over the last week and had explained that normally she wouldn't be notified this quickly, but given recent circumstances, he had several duties for her to take up before arrival.

The battle - as it were - against Voldemort was now in full swing. 'Actually,' Hermione had thought angrily one day, 'it's not so much of a battle as a slow execution of the opposing forces.'

Every day there were more instances of deaths surrounded by looming Dark Marks. She was only barely containing her anger at the seeming lack of response from the Order of the Phoenix; but any time one of the students residing there had brought it up, they had been quickly hushed, saying that steps were being taken. So many families had been hit in the course of the attacks that Dumbledore had charged Hermione with the task of compiling a list of deceased students and brainstorming ideas as to how the matter should be addressed within Houses.

Hermione starred down in horror. Barely a month from the beginning of term, she couldn't even begin to guess how they could possibly address losses of this magnitude. There were so many losses that Hufflepuff House (being the heaviest with muggleborns and those with mixed parentage) was nearly cut in half. They were not the only ones, however. Gryffindor had suffered some weighty blows as well. Hermione shook her head as her eyes scanned the Gryffindor House casualty list. She had grown up with many of the people who were now just names and dates on paper.

"So many ..." she said a loud. "So many young ones, too ...." The list was too full - far too full - of her classmates.

Gryffindor House - Student Casualties

Abercrombie, Euan - July 1

Creevey, Colin - July 3

Dickinson, Lilah - July 4

Eggleston, Marissa - July 6

Finnigan, Seamus - July 7

Hollingsworth, Penny - July 8

Kirke, Andrew- July 10

Maharini, Oscar - July11

Patil, Parvati - July 13

Sheffield, Grace Ann - July14

Sloper, Jack - July 15

Thomas, Dean - July 7

Vreeland, Annabelle - 17

Zorich, Belinda - July 20

She sighed heavily, starring down at the list with a tight throat. The names that corresponded with each date were so alphabetical - with the exception of Dean Thomas, who had been murdered while visiting Seamus Finnigan - that it was almost as if someone had gone down a class list and checked them off as they died. 'So many people ...' she pondered, 'how can we bear it?'

"What's the final count?" a soft voice said, behind her shoulder. Hermione turned to find Harry standing behind her in the study. She had not even noticed him come to the door; she was so engrossed in the list on the desk. His face was glazed with concern and sadness and there was something almost guilty behind his eyes. The happy-go-lucky cheer of only hours ago had disappeared.

She shook her head again as she responded. "Fourteen from Gryffindor ... but Hufflepuff has lost forty-six. Nearly half the whole house. The only surviving seventh-year Hufflepuffs were Hannah Abbott, Ernie Macmillan and Susan Bones. Ironically, the only house virtually untouched was Slytherin, they only lost one." Hermione shook her head as Harry moved to quietly stand behind her. "And what happens when we go back to school? All these people all in one place. Oh, poor Lavender ... she'll have a time without Parvati. And Padma, too, I suppose. But Dennis Creevy! How will he ever get on without his brother? They were inseparable, he'll be lost."

After a moment of silently scanning the lists, Harry spoke quietly, "Ron, Neville and I are the only remaining Gryffindor seventh year boys."

Hermione nodded silently, ashamed with herself for momentarily considering that this severely limited her eligible male pool. She couldn't contain the wretched thought now that it had escaped, and she was thoroughly disappointed with herself. She sighed heavily again, ready to try and divert him from the subject at hand, when he took it on himself.

"I would have petitioned if I could have," he said, his voice dropping to a barely audible hush.

"What?" she asked, not certain she had heard him correctly. Hermione turned in her seat to see Harry standing, hands on the back of her chair, face screwed up in fretfulness.

"I said...." He took a breath to steady himself. "If I could have petitioned for you myself, I would have."

"Oh, Harry, I ... I don't know what to say. It just ... means so much to me that my friends would take the chance of giving up marriage for love just to protect me."

He took another breath, his chest shaking slightly. He looked down into her eyes and then away again. "I wouldn't be giving it up, Hermione."

She opened her mouth to question him but closed it quickly with an audible snap as it occurred to her what he had just said. "I ... oh," she mumbled, not quite able to formulate a response. She could feel a deep flush creeping up her cheeks. Had Harry just told her he loved her?

"I'd ... er ...I'd appreciate it if you didn't talk about this ... after today," he muttered shakily.

In the absence of a response, Hermione just nodded her head. 'Things are definitely getting complicated,' she thought.

Harry moved around the chair to look her in the face. Slowly he leaned down and placed his lips against her cheek. She sat stunned for a moment, not able to formulate any coherent thoughts as he stood straight again and walked from the room.

"Oh, bloody hell," Hermione muttered as the door clicked shut. She laid her forehead against the cool mahogany of the desktop and exhaled loudly. "It's never easy."

*****