Eyes of Sky

The first things he could remember were the eyes. Hollow and so sad, that as they burned with a misery so acute he'd felt he couldn't look into them any longer than what he had, burned also with a passion and a hunger he himself had felt locked within him for most of his life. Yes, how could he forget those eyes? Whenever he shut his own eyes, even to blink, he would see them. See them seeing him and boring deep into his soul.

After the eyes, came the rest. Her hair, dark and ragged about her cheeks as if it hadn't been cut properly in years (much like his own he realised as he remembered) hid her cheeks from him. What she couldn't hide though, was her unsteady breathing and small thin frame. He remembered the shock he had felt as he saw how...how....skeletal she was. There was, quite literally, nothing to her. As she bowed over her knees (her hands were tied brutally behind her back he recalled with a physical jolt) he saw all the bones in her back sticking out, as sharp as blades.

And the room they were in...cold, dank, the smell of decay all about them.

He felt acid rise in his throat.

He had to get out.

Get out.

"GET OUT!!!" Remus Lupin, in a moment, shattered the comfortable silence around him with his blood curdling scream. Before he could even catch his breath, he heard several sudden movements form various places about the dorm, and the room was quickly thrown into stark relief by the pure bright light of many wands.

"Whatwassat?" Sirius Black, twenty-five percent of the notorious marauder team, pointed his wand towards his best friend's bed, causing the boy to shrink under the covers as his eyes stung with the light.

"Moony? Moony? You okay mate? Bloody hell that was scary...was that you? Moony???" James' voice became tense as he saw Remus' rigid outline under the covers. His frown deepened further as he turned to look at the other beds in the dorm, and saw that Peter, supposedly one of his best friends, loyal until the end, was snoring softly, seemingly completely unconcerned with the fact that his best friend was huddled under a quilt, refusing to answer to many concerned voices coming form around the room.

A swift glance to Sirius, and the two crossed to Remus' bed, pulled back the thick cover, and dragged their friend out of the now eerily silent room and down to the Gryffindor common room.

Remus shook himself out of the tense grasps of his two friends and wandered unsteadily over to a lumpy couch and sat down heavily. He sighed audibly, and rested his head into his hands. James noted, with a start, how haggard his friend looked and how pale. He could see all the scars on his friends back standing out against the white of Remus' skin.

"Moony? Are you okay? You look like shite mate..." James was about to cover up for Sirius' somewhat unfeeling words, when his sickly looking companion turned round, an amused glint in his eyes, which had been so vacant a minute ago.

"I can't stay miserable around you lot, can I? I'd be slaughtered alive," Remus laughed hollowly, and suddenly all the melancholy was back.

"Moony, what WAS that? Nothing, absolutely nothing, and then this....this....SCREAM..."

"Come on Moony. Padfoot's right - you have to tell us what's going on...." Remus looked up as the two boys made their way over to the couch opposite where he was sitting, and sat themselves heavily down. He couldn't tell them...they wouldn't understand...but then, wasn't that what he told himself before he told them he was a werewolf? A half-breed? Looking at Sirius, then at James, Remus realised that he couldn't keep his two best friends in the dark about this...their eyes told him everything he needed to know. They would understand, better than anyone....

"Come on Moony."

"Spill," Remus looked intently at his two friends, trying to work out where to start...the dreams, or the feelings? He sighed and rubbed his face as he leaned back into the couch he was sitting on. The beginning, he supposed, would be a good a place as any.

"Okay...well, I suppose it began around three months ago..."

"That time...it...was really bad?" James knew not to mention Remus' particular problem explicitly. He knew his friend would rather not be reminded of that whilst confiding in them.

"Yeah, that time. I don't know what happened...for about five days either side of the full moon, I got these awful...awful dreams. God I can't take them any more..." Remus trailed off into silence and stared blankly at the softly glowing fire. Sirius and James looked at each other nervously. Sirius was about to start talking when Remus, apparently having composed himself, spoke again.

"They aren't that horrific, the dreams...no blood, no gore, nothing like that. I can just...feel...how much pain she's in every time I see her. And...and she's so thin. Like she hasn't eaten for God knows how long. You can see every. Single. Bone," as he accentuated the words, Remus traced the bones sticking out on his own thin hands. "I never see her face but her eyes....her eyes. Often that's all I see. So hollow...so sad...but so angry at the world at the same time. I've never seen anyone have so much hate for life...apart from...apart from me."

"Who IS she Remus?"

"I don't know...I'm going through all this confusion for someone I DON'T KNOW!" There was that hollow laugh again. James' frown deepened even further. "If I saw her... I would know her. I would recognise her in an instant. Even though I've never seen her face. I would know her. Just by the way she moved, or the way she smelled...I would know her, without a doubt."

"Is she real then, Moony? She isn't just part of your imagination? She's actually alive and walking around now?"

"I have no doubt about it," he shook his head suddenly, resolutely. The conversation was over, "Come on. I'm tired. Let's go back to bed."

"Are you sure, Moony? I mean...what happens if the dreams come back?" Remus just shook his head, and the three boys trudged back up to their dorm room, and settled back into the now chill mattresses of their beds.

Within moments, Remus heard the breathing of his friends join the rest of the boys' in the dorm. He too shut his eyes, and as he and his friends had known, the dreams came back.

He was back in the damp room that smelled so much of decaying flesh. Once again, he saw the chair on which she was...she wasn't there! There was the chair, there were the cruel ropes that had bound her wrists tightly behind her back, but she wasn't there.

His ears suddenly became keener - listening for the slightest sound in the room. For some reason, he was scared. The slippery walls seemed to close in on him. The smell became worse and worse. He could feel himself retching...and then he heard the slightest of movements behind him.

Remus turned quickly to face the sound, and instead of sound, he came face to face with the girl from the chair. He recognised the eyes; there was the sad anger, but the rest of the face he couldn't believe it belonged to her. Her lips were cracked and sore, and dried blood had formed a crust inside the cracks. The skin of her face was pale, almost translucent, but standing out starkly against the paleness were deep red welts, four on each cheek. As if, over and over again, she had dragged her nails down her face until she bled...trying to get something out, Remus thought.

Engrossed in taking her face in, he jumped when she placed an icy hand upon his cheek and caressed it slightly. The coldness of her palm actually burned his skin, so he flinched from her touch. She withdrew her hand steadily, and tilted her head to the side, almost as if she was confused.

He tried to speak, ask her who she was, but found he couldn't talk. He could move his mouth, but no sound came out. She smiled slowly, and her eyes glinted with...what was that? Humour? Whatever it was, she smiled, stepped back, ever so slightly, and screamed. Automatically, Remus clapped his hands over his ears. The sound was so high pitched and mournful, he felt that his ears would burst with the noise. Her mouth closed, but the screaming went on and on. As he felt he was about to pass out from the pain, her mouth opened again. He couldn't tell if a noise came out, but he watched her lips move...'I'll see you soon...'

Then the image faded.

And he was back in the quiet dormitory. This time, he hadn't screamed.