A Baneful Brew

A Baneful Brew

Professor Lupin strode into the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom on the Thursday after the last Full Moon. The fifth year Ravenclaws continued to chatter amongst themselves, unconcerned with the presence of a teacher.

It wasn't until Lupin had his case open on his desk and had cleared his throat for silence that all faces turned forwards. A few of them exchanged whispers or pulled expressions of mild curiosity at the changed appearance of their Professor. It would have been obvious - even if Professor Snape hadn't informed them - that Lupin had been ill last lesson. He looked very tired and pale, his kind expression generally a little more pained than usual.

"Good afternoon. I trust Professor Snape didn't let you off work last lesson?" Lupin raised an enquiring eyebrow.

More polite than lowly third years, the fifth years always waited for an excuse to express discontent, and Lupin had given them a perfectly reasonable excuse for it. The classroom burst into a - not unexpected by Lupin - babble of complaints, disgust and disgruntled descriptions of the homework they'd been set.

As Lupin had expected, Snape had dedicated all the lessons he had taken to teaching his classes about the horrors of the werewolf. He sighed. "Have any of you actually done the work he set you?"

"We did it last year." Harold Fields rolled his eyes. "I was just going to hand in the work I did last year." The rest of the class made sounds of agreement.

Lupin smiled. Teaching Ravenclaws was very different to teaching the Hufflepuff second-years he'd had before lunch. "Well if you have to do that next time Professor Snape teaches you, I think it would be a very good idea. But this time, don't bother. I'll speak with Professor Snape and hopefully you won't have to try that - ah - method.

"Today, I did plan to start our in-depth work on the vampire, but as Professor Snape has so kindly started you off, we'll start the study of werewolves instead." Lupin sounded even more tired as he said this, and he looked as though he felt that he had resigned himself to a particularly nasty fate.

"So, can anyone tell me..." He seemed to consider for a moment, then, "what the most recent discoveries as regards to the werewolf are?"

None of them had seen the Professor so unsmiling, so...nervous? He had never hesitated before, never explained reasons for teaching the topic he was teaching...a few of the Ravenclaws began to wonder how bad his illness was. One Ravenclaw didn't wonder. She'd guessed how bad it was, and hers was the most tentative hand in the air.

"Josephine?" Lupin acknowledged, attempting a noncommittal air.

The tentative girl swallowed and blushed, unable to hold eye contact with the Professor as she mumbled something about the Wolfsbane Potion being discovered in the late 1980s.

"Very good." Lupin muttered just as indistinctly. "Could you all please turn to page 256 of your textbook - Dark Dark Creatures by Lucifer Schwartz; not your standard ones," he added before they could ask. "Seeing as I'm so unprepared for today's lesson, I'm afraid it will just be another one of note-taking. However--" he continued over the groans, "next week I'll try and think of some sort of practical, or perhaps a field trip."

The mollified fifth years spent the rest of the lesson in silence - mostly. At the end as they left, Lupin noticed Josephine Butler hanging back a little and casting furtive, thoughtful glances his way.

"Josephine, can I ask you something?" he called, as she was about to leave. One of her friends giggled and muttered something to her, whilst she blushed like an angry tomato and cast her friend a menacing glance.

"Yes, sir?" She looked across the classroom at him with apprehensive blue eyes.

He sat down heavily at his desk, his expression as troubled as hers. "I...did Professor Snape give any impression that - "

"No," she interrupted hastily, blushing furiously again. "I guessed. From...from the book."

Lupin's lip twitched, as though he had restrained some outburst. "I see. You're the second person today who has. Snape knows exactly what he's doing."

Josephine didn't say anything, although the felt a few questions begin to burn her tongue.

"Josephine, can I ask you to keep this a secret, please? Dumbledore does know about me, but if parents were to find out..."

The fifth year nodded. "Yes, sir, of course." She had been about to add I understand, but thought the better of it, as she probably didn't understand at all.

She fled from the classroom as quickly as possible without actually sprinting. The idea of being alone in a classroom with Professor Lupin gave her a decidedly funny feeling.

* * * * * * * * * * *

The following week for the fifth years' next lessons, Lupin had arranged excursions into the Dark Forest. The Ravenclaws and Slytherins were going together on Tuesday, and Gryffindor and Hufflepuff would go on Wednesday. Both groups were to be accompanied by Hagrid, the groundskeeper, Filch, the caretaker, Professor Flitwick, the diminutive Charms teacher and Head of Ravenclaw, and much to everyone except the Slytherins' disgust, Professor Snape, the Potions teacher and Head of Slytherin.

The Ravenclaws and Slytherins split into five groups, Snape's suggestion of friends being separated to increase concentration being ignored by Lupin, Flitwick and Hagrid, whilst Filch just pulled expressions of utmost disgust.

Harold Fields, Tony Fletcher and the rest of Ravenclaw's ultimate pranksters insisted on being accompanied by Filch for reasons unknown to everyone else. Flitwick cheerily accepted a group of friends who were all brilliant at Charms to travel with him and an unhappy group of Slytherins who had banded with them for the day. Hagrid chortled when a group of bitchy Slytherin girls with manicured nails and silky hair insisted that they went with him and Fang, his boar hound. Before Snape could choose the group including Josephine Butler, her friends and the remaining Slytherins, Lupin intervened, saying he wanted to ask Terence Higgs about his last piece of homework. Snape, who knew he would have stood the best chance of sneakily dropping hints that would be picked up on to Josephine and her friends, sulked like a big black thundercloud as his group of Ravenclaws already began plotting ways of losing him in the Forest.

Lupin, apparently in a much better mood today, strode with his group ahead and called out every so often upon seeing a trace of some local creature. The Ravenclaws looked around with interest, bewitched quills taking notes down as they headed deeper into the Forest. At a fork in the path, Lupin paused. "Here we'll split into two groups. When the path next forks you'll split up again ok? Severus, Rubeus, would you come this way with me, please? And Argus and Fred, would you mind taking the other path?"

"Not at all!" Professor Frederick Flitwick squeaked, waving a cheery goodbye and leading his and Filch's groups away with great enthusiasm. Filch followed them, his jowls quivering, and his shoulders hunched.

Professor Snape and his group plodded along behind Hagrid's group who were beginning to get on the groundskeepers' nerves now. He had ceased giving sarcastic answers to their idiotic questions, and now merely grunted in annoyance at their silly exclamations.

The next time the path divided, Lupin sent Hagrid off to the right with a pitying glance, whilst Snape got more and more irritated.

They stopped finally for a lunch break at about one o'clock. Lupin left Snape in charge while he went to check the path ahead, and Snape turned a blind eye to whatever the five Slytherin students did.

In fact, they had approached the Ravenclaws. Snape didn't bat an eyelid when one of them put the Leg-Locker Curse on a Ravenclaw girl. Josephine Butler - defending her friend - leapt to her feet and pointed her wand at the Slytherin. Snape raised his own wand from where he sat, "Expelliarmus!" he said calmly. Josephine flew back with a shriek into a tangle of brambles and so did her wand.

The Slytherins laughed raucously, but all the Ravenclaws could do was glare menacingly back.

Josephine was rummaging through the undergrowth swearing not too quietly, and complaining about her lost wand. Soon enough she had to admit that it had been thrown a little further backwards than she had, and she cast a final, angry look Snape's way before storming off the path.

The air immediately seemed colder and the light less abundant than it had on the path. She shivered and crouched down, brushing her hair from her eyes and peering dejectedly at the covering of autumn leaves on the ground.

She'd gone a few more steps when a sudden rustling made her leap to her feet, scrabbling for the wand that wasn't there. Professor Lupin emerged from the gloom of the thick forest rubbing at a point on his head. Josephine stifled another shriek. He looked up in surprise. "Josephine, what are you doing?"

"I lost my wand," she muttered, not meeting his eyes.

"Oh, so the one that just hit me on the head will probably be yours?"

"I'm sorry!" she gasped, backing out of the trees, glad because it was dark that he couldn't see her crimson cheeks.

But Lupin had interpreted her embarrassment as fear, and he asked quietly, "are you afraid of me because of what I am?"

"No!" she said hastily, stopping her flight in shock. "I - I don't care. No! I mean, I don't...notice? I don't mind... I..." she trailed off, looking at the ground in a dejected sort of way.

"Thank you, Jo." Lupin smiled and held her wand out to her. She reached out and took it slowly; her wide eyes now seemingly fixed to him, whereas before, they had been willing to look anywhere but at him. Lupin couldn't explain it, but in that moment, he felt that if he asked it, this girl would follow him wherever he went. He found himself beginning to lean forwards, as though drawn by some invisible cord in those blue eyes. His nose was a few millimetres from Josephine's when a voice called out--

"Where are you, you silly girl?"

She gave a start and a little squeak, her eyes flying away from his face again, and she turned and shot through the undergrowth.

Lupin swore quietly. What in Knockturn Alley happened to me? He walked slowly back to the path a bit further up, so it wouldn't seem suspicious that he came out just behind a rather ruffled-looking Josephine. You're being paranoid. It's probably just the wolf having fun because you're in the Forest.

"Lupin," Snape said silkily as he rejoined the group. "If the path ahead is clear," he sneered, "I suggest we get a move on if you are still planning on splitting our groups before sunset.

Professor Lupin nodded, and not once looking to see what Josephine's expression was he marched off ahead again.

Each ignored the other one for the rest of the day, and Lupin had nearly forgotten the feeling that had overcome him earlier. Josephine, however, hadn't forgotten at all.

* * * * * * * * * * *

The terrible cold dread washed over the upper school as they filed out through the main gates past ghastly figures in black: the Dementors. It was the second Hogsmeade trip of the term, and no one had got used to the horrible guardians yet.

'Own Clothes Day' had gone to most peoples' heads - they talked with raised voices and raised spirits, and laughed more than usual... once they were past the Dementors.

Josephine had been very jumpy and nervous since the field trip. She blushed at any mention of Professor Lupin and couldn't concentrate in classes because she was so confused. She sulked at the back of the group of fifth years, huddling away from the autumn wind in her purple robes.

Professor Lupin was also in a thoughtful and reflective mood - he strolled along merrily with the other teachers, but his mind was trying to work out why Josephine Butler kept attracting his attention and popping into his thoughts... especially around the Full Moon.

Lupin knew that the Full Moon was only a few days away, and he'd been taking his Wolfsbane potion for the past two days... Odd, he thought. Only two days ago I thought of her again...

He split from the other teachers as they entered the wizarding village, lost in his thoughts - trying to work out what was going on in his own head. He was absent-mindedly staring into the window of Dervish and Banges, the wizarding equipment store, when a suspicious and possibly angry pair of blue eyes met his through the glass. Josephine glared and spun away, squirming through the crowds to escape the window.

Lupin felt the now familiar - yet still odd - twinge somewhere inside him, and he frowned at the crowd, trying to see where Josephine had gone.

Just at that moment, the door flew open next to him, and she came flying out in a whirl of violet, leaping down the step to begin a quick getaway. Professor Lupin gently but firmly shot a hand out, taking a light hold on her wrist. "What's wrong?" he asked quietly.

"Stop it!" she whispered.

"Josephine, what's wrong?"

"Leave me alone, please!" she pleaded, her eyes welling up with stubborn tears.

"Come with me a minute," he said persuasively. "I want to show you something."

She came, but reluctantly. When they reached the destination Lupin had been leading her towards, she said softly, "I've seen the Shrieking Shack, sir."

Lupin smiled sadly. "The most haunted building in Britain, isn't it?"

"Apparently..." she said guardedly.

"What would you think if I told you there had never been any ghosts in that building?"

"I...would want to know how you found that out, or what makes you think that...when - when most sources claim that it was ghosts that disturbed the peace here..."

Lupin smiled - the Ravenclaw in her had reared itself from the ashes. "You know," he said. "There never have been any ghosts in this building."

"What - what makes you think that, sir?" Her voice had become a frightened whisper again.

"I was in the building at the times of the 'hauntings'."

Josephine studied him, her expression apprehensive, but her eyes thoughtful and her frown also giving evidence that she was thinking carefully about what he had just said.

"You...? Or - " she hesitated, before making up her mind to just say it. "Or the w - wolf?"

Lupin's sad smile remained. He glanced down the hill to the village, checking that no one was approaching, then he began to unbutton the top of his shirt.

Josephine stepped back, watching him suspiciously. His expression, however, was as concerned as hers, and he said in explanation, "My scar," pulling the material away from his chest to reveal the place where he had been cursed.

She couldn't hold in the sob that welled up her throat, and gently reached out, uncertain. When he said nothing, she ran her fingertips along the old wound, feeling how deep it must have been. Then the bizarrness of the situation hit her as her eyes flicked across his skin and came to rest upon his teachers' robes. She choked out another sob, and stepped away quickly. "Why are you doing this?" She managed to give Lupin the impression that she had wailed this question, although she had merely whispered it.

Calmly, he pulled her back towards him, holding her closely. She relaxed a little in his arms, and he had to fight the familiar longing as it rose within him, threatening to overcome his strong control of emotions. Quickly, he whispered, "I think someone is spiking my Wolfsbane with some sort of desire potion. Are you any good at potions? Can you help me?"

Her long hair was whipping in the bracing autumn wind, but otherwise she remained completely still for a long moment as she thought. "Why would someone do that?"

Lupin smiled crookedly. "To get me fired. I could lose my job if that potion got to me."

She raised her head from his shoulder then. "So... why is it only working on me?" Her grin was also slightly twisted.

"It must be a potion that depends on the inclusion of a piece of some particular person. Is there any way anyone could have got one of your hairs, or something like that?"

Josephine thought carefully, taking one arm from her hold on Lupin to try and tuck her hair behind her ear as the wind played with it. At the Hufflepuff/Gryffindor Quidditch match, she'd though she'd felt something tug on the back of her head, but when she'd turned round, there had only been some third-year Slytherins cheering the defeat of Gryffindor.

"Draco Malfoy..." she scowled.

Professor Lupin was incredulous. "Malfoy? I know he's not a nice person, but is there really any reason to suspect him? He doesn't know about me, either."

"Does his father?" Josephine asked shrewdly.

"Lucius? Yes, I suppose he must," he said sharply.

"Perhaps Lucius Malfoy has been telling Draco to do it, but just like everyone else, he's also been telling him that you're ill. Snape probably doesn't even know that it's spiked."

Lupin considered this carefully. "Do you think you can find a way of...neutralising it? Or something like that?"

"There might be a way. I don't pretend to be an expert at potions, though - quite the opposite. The potion would almost certainly be in a book in the Restricted Section of the library, though. That ought to include neutralising potions, or reversing potions."

"I'll write you a note of permission to search the section as soon as I'm back in my office." Lupin stated, before adding, "thank you."

Josephine smiled into his shoulder again. "Any time, sir."

* * * * * * * * * * *

Despite Madam Pince's suspicious glares, Josephine managed to escape the library with a copy of Moste Potente Potions. She lay on her stomach on a chaise-long in the Ravenclaw common room poring over the hideous spells the book displayed.

She yawned and glanced up at the bronze cuckoo clock on the wall. It was two in the morning and she was the only one still awake. She flipped another page, expecting to find yet another curse to turn your enemies inside out - ears first this time - but instead was confronted with the picture of an ugly old wizard being 'attended to' by a pretty witch. Josephine pulled a face and blushed at the image. The title read in gothic scripture:

"Get ones way withe potente luste potions"

She turned the page again, scrolling down horrible-sounding sub-headings until she reached

"Antidotes/Neutralisers"

She sighed in relief and began to scribble down the ingredients to the first potion it listed on a piece of spare parchment. Josephine then slammed the book shut and heaved it off the coffee table. She consulted the list while trudging along the corridor to the dorm she shared with her friends. Not too bad. At least I have most of these in my potions kit.

* * * * * * * * * * *

Sitting in the library the next day and trying not to fall asleep, Josephine eventually gave up on her Ancient Runes homework. She instead picked up a textbook on 'Useful Modern Magical Discoveries' and flicked to the page on Wolfsbane. She read in growing horror the section regarding absolute necessities in the making of the potion. It stated: "Sugar, snake fangs and foxglove flowers render this unstable potion unusable. If any of these ingredients are included, the drinker will not be tamed as he/she ought to be by the drinking of the Wolfsbane."

Josephine swore a little too loudly for Madam Pince's tastes and leapt up. She fumbled in her pocket for the scrap of parchment and when she found it her face fell as she saw 'foxglove flowers' on the list.

Throwing open Moste Potente Potions - which she had been about to hand in today - once more, Josephine was dismayed to discover that foxgloves were an essential ingredient in the neutraliser.

She picked up the potions book, and the discoveries one and fled from the library, Madam Pince hollering after her that she hadn't taken that book out and Ravenclaw fifth years should be more responsible than that!

* * * * * * * * * * *

Professor Lupin looked up from his Gryndylow tank in surprise at the urgency of the knock on his office door. "Josephine?" he asked in surprise as the flustered girl made her way through the door he held open, a textbook under each arm.

"Sir, it won't work!" she gasped.

"What? Slow down, breathe!" he said with a calming smile.

"The neutralisers! They all need foxglove flowers, which make the Wolfsbane ineffective!"

His smile faded, but he somehow held onto the calm expression. "O-okay." Lupin stammered, struggling with urgent feeling that scudded across his mind like dark clouds at this news. "So, basically, I either take the Wolfsbane as it is, and risk... risk doing something I could regret," he avoided Josephine's eyes as he said this, a pained expression finally creeping onto his tired features. "Or we use the neutraliser, and I have to go to the Shrieking Shack on the night of the Full Moon."

Josephine just watched him in silence, deciding that she wasn't the right person to advise which Lupin should choose.

Again feeling guilt and disgust at his feelings towards the student standing in front of him, Lupin said hoarsely, "I'll just have to pay another visit to the Shack... It'll be just like old times." He managed a weak smile and moved slowly to his desk, leaning his hands heavily on his desk and bowing his head.

Josephine still didn't move or speak, unsure of whether to go, or whether to stay. She could just reach an arm out - lay it comfortingly over those hunched shoulders... But she backed towards the door instead, not wanting to inflict or receive any sort of pain.

"Wait." Lupin said as she reached for the door handle, her eyes not leaving his tense form as he continued to grip the table edges, his knuckles whitening. "I need your help still, Josephine... Is that okay?"

He finally looked up, and even had she wanted to, the torment in his grey eyes couldn't have persuaded her to refuse.

* * * * * * * * * * *

More scared than she'd ever been in her life, Josephine stood shivering next to the Whomping Willow on the frosty November dawn. She would have been marvelling at the incredible miniature rainbows which danced from each individual flake of ice as the sun rose, but instead she was watching the roots of the tree, waiting for someone.

It was nearly six o'clock by the time she heard a shuffling, scraping noise from beneath the Whomping Willow. She'd been getting panicky, fearing that someone who woke early would see her down there on a Saturday morning, but no one seemed to have stirred inside the castle during the whole time she'd been waiting.

Picking up the dead branch she'd had ready; Josephine tentatively prodded the specific gnarl on the old tree's trunk that subdued it. Slowly she walked forwards, the branch still in her frozen fingers. She held her breath as the scraping got louder, not knowing what she should expect, but just as she raised the branch, a bloodied hand found its way out of the passage.

Bruised, battered, torn and pale, Professor Lupin emerged from the tunnel underneath the Willow. Josephine gave a horrified gasp and dropped the branch instantly. She reached a hand down to him - an offering of help.

Lupin - his eyes seemingly unfocused on anything - raised a shaky hand of his own, which he clamped onto her shoulder as she leaned forwards. "Thank you," he croaked as they finally began stumbling back up the grounds towards the castle.

* * * * * * * * * * *

"I have got to get you to Madam Pomfrey, right now." Josephine said in a no-nonsense tone of voice (that quivered only a little).

"No." Lupin insisted; his mind having cleared during the long traipse up to the second floor, where his office was. "I told you, Jo, I can't go in to the infirmary like this. Just imagine the questions that would be raised if I were to be seen."

With an air of resignation, Josephine pushed open his office door. She carefully lowered him to the old sofa in the corner and turned to a bowl of lightly steaming blue liquid. "This is the most advanced antiseptic potion I could prepare in the time I had. It won't be quite as potent as Madam Pomfrey's."

Lupin nodded and shrugged his cloak off painfully, looking down at his torn and tattered shirt in dismay. He fumbled with the buttons for a second before giving up in exasperation - his fingers were so bruised that it hurt too much to grip the tiny pieces of wood.

Josephine had turned round, and she watched him lie back in resignation, his eyes closed and a grimace decorating his face. As he slowly raised his feet to the couch too, so that he was lying fully stretched on his back, she had to grit her own teeth. Stop it. You're being a stupid, stupid, typical teenage girl. Just leave it. But Professor Lupin was still there, and she couldn't see that he was about to get up and clean his own wounds.

"Uh, sir...?" she began tentatively. He didn't open his eyes, but made a slight noise of interest. "Um, I... can't get to your wounds."

He opened one eye and forced a painful smile. "Just rip the material off. I don't think this shirt will be one I'll be able to repair."

She stared at him in complete disbelief. Josephine imagined that right now she looked like the world's stupidest gold fish, standing there with her mouth open and her eyes popping. "I...what...?" she whimpered - the bowl still in one hand, held underneath the dripping sponge that was in the other hand. You are NOT helping me overcome this inner teenager! She was screaming inside at him.

"Don't be shy." He let out a short, sad, harsh laugh, and waggled his bloody fingers at her sadly.

So Josephine crouched down beside Professor Lupin, setting the bowl of antiseptic potion on the floor next to her. With shaking hands she carefully undid the buttons on his shirt and pulled the material away from his broken skin. The material was wet with blood, and her fingers were as red as Lupin's by the time she'd pried it all away from the sticky wounds on his chest.

"I think I'll uh, go get some water first." She gulped, standing up and rushing into a side room of his office, where a large stone sink was kept permanently filled by a carved hippogriff that poured enchanted water from its mouth. Josephine took a moment to just lean over the sink and glare at her reflection wobbling in the moving surface. Stop it. She repeated firmly to herself. You'll only frustrate yourself and look like a fool in front of him. Not that you don't already. She slapped the water hard with the small stone bowl she'd brought, and ignoring it as water slopped over the sides, she stormed back into the room.

Professor Lupin was still lying on his back when she re-entered, but his hands were covering his face - he looked like he was pressing them hard to his temples - and his breathing was quite quick and deep.

For once in her life, Josephine felt that she hadn't made herself into even more of an idiot - she had been about to ask, 'Sir, are you all right?' but with some flash of intuition she managed to keep her mouth shut. Very carefully she wiped a smooth, wet cloth over his chest, her jaw set, and her gaze fixed on nothing in particular. But it was impossible not to notice that as she did this, his heavy breathing stopped abruptly, as though he was holding his breath. Trying desperately not to think about why he was doing this, she hastily put the magically cleaned water down and picked up the antiseptic.

At the first dab, his chest heaved - he'd drawn in a deep breath finally at the sting of the potion. He also lowered his hands. "Thanks for warning me about that one."

"Sorry," she mumbled, but a tiny smile tugged at one side of her lips and Lupin didn't miss it as he watched her go over each would thoroughly.

"Would you mind doing my back for me, too?" he asked. "It isn't as bad - I don't think."

"Okay," she muttered. Then with an unexpected surge of confidence, "but if your legs need doing I'm sure you'll manage on your own."

He looked quite astonished for a moment, and Josephine felt a horrified flush rise from her chin to her hairline. But then he laughed. "I guess I'll have to, won't I?" And the flush remained, but - very unusually - it was now one of pride.

One by one Josephine healed the cuts as best she could with her wand, muttering an embarrassed and sheepish, "I'm not much of a healer..." as she did so.

After repeating the process on his back - which in general did have less scars, too - she gathered up the bowls and, saying she'd leave them on his desk for him, she slipped out of the office, followed by a very warm "Thank you, Josephine."

* * * * * * * * * * *

For a month, they both seemed to feel that life could carry on as normal - Josephine, as usual, was the best student in Defence Against the Dark Arts and Lupin, as usual, was everyone (who had any sense)'s favourite teacher. But exactly a month later, at the end of their Thursday Defence Against the Dark Arts lesson, Professor Lupin called Josephine back as she was leaving.

"Josephine? Could you give me a minute, please?"

She walked back through the desks to him. "Yes, sir?"

"I'm having a spot of trouble deciding which option to take this month. The Daily Prophet could start reporting on the noises again if they reappear regularly and if it does, Dumbledore will guess what's been happening."

"Uh... Why don't you want Dumbledore to know?" she asked, dumbfounded.

"At first I didn't think it was worth troubling him - I thought that neutraliser would sort it out."

"And now?" she prompted, unsure whether she liked the direction that this was going in.

"There's no point doing it today - Malfoy will have put the potion in, and Snape won't have time to brew a fresh Wolfsbane before tomorrow."

"But you could tell him, and he'd make arrangements..."

"Josephine, I'm going to take the potion, I think," he said before she could protest any more. "You stay well away from me all tomorrow, and stay away from my office, too. You understand?"

"Yes!" she answered quickly, seeing a flame of determination in his expression and hearing it in his voice.

* * * * * * * * * * *

Despite that flame of determination in Professor Lupin's previous words - or maybe due to it - Josephine kept thinking of things that required her to go to some point of the castle near his office. She was growing more and more frustrated that she couldn't do anything on the second floor as the day progressed, but she managed to restrain herself.

Finally, relieved that the day was over, she began to walk down the staircase towards the Ravenclaw common room. As she did so, however, the huge stone structure gave an almighty lurch and swung to the left.

Once it was still she hurried off it as fast as she could, annoyed at its prolonging her stay out of the dorms. As she ran up the flight of stairs that it had landed her at, she thought she heard other footsteps. It was only half-past seven and most people were already in common rooms enjoying the weekend. Then she thought of which floor the Ravenclaws were on - First - and which floor she was approaching by ascending her current stairs - Second.

She spun round and began to sprint back down, but a voice that she should have ignored instead made her freeze. "Josephine. What are you doing here?"

He sounds normal enough...That was a bad thought, she knew. "I... was just going down to the dorms." She took another step down.

He smiled. "You look worried. What's wrong?"

You are! Stop it, stop it, stop IT! "N... nothing. I'm fine."

"Do you have a lot of work to do?"

Yes! "No."

He now looked pleasantly surprised. "Oh, well maybe you'd like to come and have a look at the new Red Cap I've got for my third years...?"

Red Cap? I've not heard it called that before! "Uhh... I don't know... I--" Josephine looked down; her bag had split along the seam and its contents were rolling and flapping down the stairs.

"Do you want some help with that?" One of Professor Lupin's hands was in his pocket. She eyed it suspiciously; sure that that was the pocket which he kept his wand in.

Before Josephine could take that chance to rush down the stairs after her books, Lupin called them back up to him with his wand. "Come on back to my office - I'm sure I've got another bag you can use."

He'd already began to walk away when slowly, in a state of dread, Josephine followed. She was terrified of what he might do. She was terrified of him... yet she wasn't. She wanted to go; she wanted to know what he'd do...

Josephine walked through the open door, looking warily around. Her books were on the desk, and the Red Cap was in a tank at the back of the room, partially covered with a frayed cloak. But where was -

The door clicked shut and she jumped. Lupin smiled. It wasn't the leering grin full of malice that she'd expected, but it was shy, gentle and a little embarrassed. "Josephine, I want to tell you--"

"Um, you said you had a bag for me, sir!" she said a little shrilly, edging to the right, trying to get nearer to the door as he stepped a little closer to her.

Unfazed, though, he carried on, his gaze far too penetrating for her liking. "I want to tell you that I don't think anyone's spiking my potion... there's nothing wrong with me. My feelings for you..." She just gaped at him in horror. "...Are as far as I can tell, perfectly real, and in no way induced by a lust potion."

"And what are you feelings for me precisely?" she asked, one hand flailing behind her for the doorknob.

"I don't know precisely. But I'd love to find out..."

She didn't have time to register this comment, or even shoot her eyebrows up at how close he suddenly was; Lupin's hands were now behind her neck and his lips were upon hers.

The lonely teenager inside her suddenly battled more fiercely than ever to be released, and Josephine was torn between grabbing a handful of his robes and pulling him nearer, or shoving him away with all her might. She settled for neither protesting nor encouraging, but still a helpless sob escaped her throat as his kisses moved gently down her neck, and his hands gently down her back.

As she tried to work out whether it was a sob of pleasure or one of revulsion, she found her back suddenly against a hard, wooden oak door. Her senses kicking in, she swung her left hand out and grabbed the doorknob. But just when she wanted to turn it, Lupin raised his grey eyes and stared into hers, and the lazy, half-closed lids drooped a little more as he kissed her again.

Now totally confused, Josephine felt tears begin to slip through her lashes and down her cheeks. With her right hand she finally decided to push him away as her left hand turned the knob. "I'm sorry!" she cried, closing the door hastily and performing a locking spell on it. Then with a flash of inspiration, she said, "Silver metallicus alchemis!" And the doorknob suddenly shone silver.

Running down the corridor and down the stairs as fast as she could with her tears flowing unchecked from the corners of each eye, Josephine ran so that she didn't have to hear Lupin's reactions.

Epilogue

Josephine skipped Defence Against the Dark Arts lessons. She copied all the work up from friends' books at night, and ignored any requests teachers made of her to go to lessons. Their treatment of her was surprisingly lax though, Josephine thought. However, she hadn't heard Professor Lupin's conversation with Professor Dumbledore, and she didn't notice that he made as much effort to avoid her as she did with him.

They finally came face to face again when Josephine turned up for her Defence Against the Dark Arts O.W.L.s. She passed both the written test and the practical - 120% and 170% respectively.

It wasn't until a beautiful, sunny June morning, when Professor Lupin didn't turn up at breakfast and some third years were admitted into the hospital wing that Josephine managed to think of him again without cringing.

"Well didn't you all know...? The man is a werewolf."

The Great Hall went deathly quiet. Professor Snape was the only teacher still in there at ten o'clock in the morning, and the students at each table stared at him in disbelief as he said this through a smirk.

A Slytherin third year was the first to speak. He said in a loud voice, "A WEREWOLF? Just wait 'till my father hears about this! What was Dumbledore thinking? My father'll see to this one, no doubt!"

Josephine felt her hands clench into fists. A few shrieks had echoed around the hall as the news sunk in, and heated arguments had sprung up all over the house benches. The third year was still shouting, telling anyone who would listen about how untrustworthy he'd always thought Professor Lupin was. Josephine stood up - she was just about opposite him across the Ravenclaw and Slytherin tables. "Professor Lupin isn't a bad man! It's not his fault he's a werewolf! He can't help it!"

Getting over this second shock, the hall was quiet for another moment, then many Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs joined in the encouraging shouts from the Ravenclaw table. The third year stared at her. "No. He can't. Which is why he's so dangerous. Why he has to GO!" The Slytherins cheered.

"How dare you!" Josephine began again, but a quiet voice silenced everyone.

"Shh. Everyone either get on with your breakfast or leave the hall, please." Professor Lupin looked tired, pale and terribly pained. Josephine forgot about the boy totally and ran out of the hall after him as he turned and carried on walking through the Entrance Hall.

"Sir! Sir I didn't tell them! I swear, it was Snape, I'm so sorry!" He looked at her in astonishment.

"I know you didn't tell them. So why are you sorry because Snape did?"

Josephine felt her bottom lip began to tremble and she clamped her teeth over it stubbornly. But her eyes were prickling and she didn't want to be stubborn anymore. For the first time in seven months she started to cry.

"Jo!" he exclaimed, lifting an arm suddenly as though to wrap around her shoulders before thinking the better of it. "Come on," he whispered gently, leading her outside. Feeling extremely stupid, Josephine still cried as they stood in the shade of a tree. Lupin let her cry. He did want to hold her and help to put a stop to her misery, but he didn't. He wanted to but he didn't and he couldn't.

Finally her tears finished. "I'm sorry," she sniffed. Then she laughed. "I just said that, sorry," she giggled again.

Lupin smiled for a moment before turning serious once more. "Josephine, I just want to apologise for my behaviour... last year."

She looked at him. "It's okay. I shouldn't have stayed. I should have just gone straight back to the dorms."

He shook his head. "No, I mean I shouldn't even have tried to sort it out with your help. It wasn't right to involve you. You're right - I should have gone straight to Dumbledore. I was a fool. I only saw it after the damage had been done. Will you be able to forgive me? I'll understand if--"

"Yes, I forgive you!" she said, shocked. "I wasn't exactly the most help I could have been." He opened his mouth to complain again, but she continued. "Don't - Okay, so we were both a bit stupid, really, but let's just leave it at that."

He smiled again. "Thank you. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go and pack."

"Pack?" she asked, alarmed.

"I can't stay. Last night I was loose and I forgot my Wolfsbane. I could have attacked anyone here. I'm not safe to have inside these grounds. Plus thanks to Snape, I won't be welcome in these grounds any more even if I was completely harmless."

Incredibly, Josephine found that she still had tears left. "No! Don't go! Please, sir!" But she couldn't think of an argument to battle the sad shake of his head as he walked up the hill towards the castle.