Stuck

"Stuck"

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I can't get out of bed today,

"Hermione! Our Hogsmeade trip is in twenty minutes! We can't miss it!" Lavender pulled the warm sheets off of me and I shivered a bit as a wave of cold swept over me.

"Huh? Wha--?" I stammered, looking about the dormitory. And there Lavender was, an expression of mixed amusement and mild irritation on her face.

"C'mon on!" she urged, grabbing my wrists and pulling me up into a sitting position. I didn't quite see what all the fuss was about, but it seemed as if Lavender was in no mood for any resistance so after she had left the room, obviously satisfied, I changed into my school robes as quickly as I could. (Do not forget the fact that it was freezing cold inside the castle!) Slipping on my shoes, I hopped out of the room and shut the door behind me. I took the steps as fast as I could and noticed Lavender was no longer in the tower, but probably in line with the other students waiting to enter Hogsmeade. But sitting patiently in the Common Room were good old Harry and Ron, babbling on about Quidditch. By the looks of it, it seemed as if they had been on that sofa in front of the fire for quite some time now.

"Morning, Hermione!" Harry chirped happily at me, Ron grinning.

Or get you off my mind.

Harry. Oy... Sometimes I don't know what to think of him. I mean, in a good way. It's just... times have changed, you know? We're all fifteen now, no longer the kids we were in our First Year at Hogwarts. And now--after seeing the same face everyday and almost every hour, I just can't look at him the same anymore.

We did have a--a small fling over the summer at the Weasley's, though rather in secret. It was rather nice, to tell you the truth. But, Harry had this certain feeling Ron fancied me too, so being the terrific friend he was to Ron, Harry ended it before things got "serious". It wasn't much of a choice to me, but rather to Harry. He wanted it over--what could I do? Protest with picket signs like the Muggle girl I am? I think not. No, no, I let Harry have his way... I mean, it was the right thing to do. For both of us.

As much as I disliked ending what Harry and I had, I had to respect the certain bond he shared with Ron. And well, if it was going to make Harry happy at the time, of course I would go through with it.

I just can't seem to find a way

To leave this love behind.

With all of these thoughts rushing back to me once more as they did last night (you see, I couldn't sleep and, as a result, couldn't get up this morning), I didn't give a proper answer. I merely said, "Mmmph."

I immediately kicked myself. What a jolly good thing to say, Hermione. 'Mmmph.'

"You're a bright little ray of sunshine, aren't you?" Ron teased, Harry smirking beside him. Ugh, let's just get to Hogsmeade so you two can go off to Zonko's and leave me in peace!!

I simply crossed to the portrait of the Fat Lady. I could hear Ron and Harry following suit; I'm pretty sure they exchanged perplexed looks as well.

I ain't trippin',

I'm just missing you.

The three of us said hello to a few of our fellow students before finally reaching the line to Hogsmeade. Harry and Ron had not spoken a word to me ever since the Common Room. I suppose they figured I was just in a foul mood. That wasn't even the half of it.

You know what I'm saying,

You know what I need.

> "Hermione, please, don't be like this! Look I don't want to do this, honest, but I just don't want Ron to think I'm stabbing him in the back or anything. I really do want to be with you and not keep it secret but I just can't... not when Ron could possibly fancy you," Harry said, almost a plea.

It was more than I could stand.

Slowly then steadily, I could feel and taste the tears running down my face. Harry watched me for a moment and then looked away. He had told me once that he hated to see me cry. He bit his lip--whether from suppressed tears or from guilt, or maybe even both, I couldn't tell. <

You can't be hanging on a string,

While you make me cry.

> "Please say something," Harry pleaded once I had stopped the waterworks.

"I just... I don't know what to say, Harry," I replied.

"Say what you're thinking. Anything."

"I think that all of this, all that we had was just a complete waste of time... all the time I spent sneaking around with you so we could take walks at night could have been used on more productive things... like summer work. But no... I--I..."

And then the words failed me. For once I could not argue, could not state my case, could not fight back for what I wanted. I just didn't know how to or what the point would be. I'd get nowhere.

Harry studied my face intently but I refused to look into those oh-too-familiar green eyes.

"Okay..."

He blinked. "Hmm?"

Must I repeat it?!

"Okay."

"So... we're okay?"

"Yes."

And he hugged me.

But I felt no will to hug him back. <

I try to give you everything

But you just gave me lies...

> I faked a sort of flu for the rest of the weekend and insisted that I be left alone so I might get some bed rest. Mrs. Weasley bought it and so did everyone else--except for Harry of course.

So for two days I stayed in bed, wallowing in misery, so to speak. The door was shut--my only visitors were Ginny and Mrs. Weasley--the only two females in the family. But they only came with food trays.

Worse than not being able to accept the truth was remembering everything else as if it were a lie. I began to question a number of things: how long ago did Harry conclude our "break up"? Did everything else we had done recently, like sitting on the garden bench and talking, mean nothing to him by then? I wanted to scream into my pillow so badly... so I did.

Ginny ran up to my room in a flash--perhaps I had not taken the right angle and screamed into my pillow incorrectly? Anyways, I convinced her that I had been sleeping and had had a minor nightmare. In a way I did, thought it wouldn't go away. The nightmare was just there... <

Every now and then,

When I'm all alone,

I'll be wishing you will call me on the telephone.

Say you want me back,

But you never do.

With all my jumbled thoughts being sorted, I didn't realize that I had already walked into the Three Broomsticks. Harry and Ron were probably at Zonko's just as I had hoped, they were nowhere to be seen. Good.

I took a seat at a corner table and sighed.

I feel like such a fool

There's nothing I can do.

I'm such a fool for you...

"And what would you like, Miss--Granger, is it?" a voice said.

I blinked and looked up. It was Madame Rosmerta.

"Oh!" I forced a smile. "Just a butterbeer please."

She smiled back and clicked away on her heels.

I sipped my butterbeer in silence, just staring out the window. It was starting to flurry.

I emptied my mug, put on my cloak, and before leaving, paid for my drink and left a small tip on the table. Once outside, I had now idea where to go.

I can't take it.

What am I waiting for?

I'm still breaking;

I miss you even more.

And I can't fake it,

The way I could before.

I hate you, but I love you.

I can't stop thinking of you.

It's true...

I'm stuck on you.

What really got to me was the fact that we "broke up" in late August and now that it was December, I still hadn't gotten over Harry! It was making me very frustrated and ill-tempered. How come Harry was all Mr. Jolly-Ollie Man while I'm just Sulky Hermione? I'm the sensible one! It should be the other way around--least maybe I wouldn't be as tormented. Maybe.

Ever since, no other guy seems like "The Guy" for me. It sucked. I was kicking around a small snowball when Lavender and Parvati positively sprinted up to me. They were just about jumping for joy.

"Hermione, Hermione!" they said earnestly. "There's a new jeweler down the street next to Honeydukes! You must see, Hermione, you must!"

I didn't even have a chance to answer. Once again I was seized by the wrists and dragged along someplace.

"You guys... I dunno... I don't really want to--"

"No, Hermione! They're beautiful! You have to see!"

No need telling me twice! The window of the shop came into view and numerous glimmering objects shimmered in the sunlight.

I was speechless.

We went in and had a look around. I absolutely fell in love with this necklace. It had a pearly white rose with a transparent green stem with leaves, suspended on a stainless steel chain. But, there was a card underneath its case that read:

The Eternal White Rose

To be given to one's true love

That they shall never part

And that their love will always grow.

This one-of-a-kind pendant thrives on love and as long as the giver and bearer of the pendant remain in the

"Fairy Tale True Love", it shall always remain resilient in its splendor.

Now, if I had a guy at the time, it would have been picture perfect. But hey, I didn't. Oh well--such is life.

Now love's a broken record that's been skipping in my head.

I keep singing yesterday...

Why have we got to play these games we play?

Lavender, Parvati, and I strolled out of the shop. We all swore that the dazzling gems were still sparkling in our eyes. Everything in that shop was just beautiful!

But, it was soon time to go back to Hogwarts and once again, it was Harry, Ron, and me in line. Whoopee.

"Find anything?" Harry asked me curiously. He held a Zonko's bag. More dungbombs I suppose.

I shook my head no. No way was I going to tell him about the Eternal Rose!!

Even so, I couldn't picture anyone giving me that necklace... no one...

No one but Harry.

It's true,

I'm stuck on you...