Nobody Understands

Chapter 4:

Sept. 1^st

I was trying to read on the train but kept getting distracted by Ron and Harry. Well, more Ron than Harry. They were both sitting across from me, laughing about something and I couldn't concentrate on my book at all because Ron's adorable laughing face kept popping up in front of me. I finally slammed my book shut.

"I'm going to change," I said rather icily.

"Alright, see you later," Ron said, still sniggering at whatever they had been laughing at before.

"I assume you are not laughing at moiu?" I said with raised eyebrows.

"Of course not," Ron reassured me at the same time Harry said, "Assume made an ass out of you and me." And we all cracked up at that.

"Very witty, Harry. We are getting close so I suggest you change while I am gone."

"Yes, ma'am," Harry and Ron both saluted me. I laughed slightly and went to find a compartment with all girls to change in. I came to a car that included Lavender and Parvati.

"Hello! Nice to see you again. Did you have a good summer?" I asked.

"Oh, hello, Hermione. It was alright, I suppose," Lavender replied coldly.

"Hi. Mine was fine too," was Parvati's polite, though distant, reply.

"Is it alright if I change in here?"

"Fine with me."

"Sure, go ahead."

"Thanks!" I tried to be cheerful. These girls really grate on me. They went back to putting on makeup and doing their hair. They seem to spend all their free hours and some that aren't doing that. This includes classes, of course.

Before I had finished changing, they had left to another compartment, giggling and whispering. I picked up my muggle clothing and walked back to my car. I heard the giggles before I opened the door; I smelled the perfume before I saw them. Lavender and Parvati were flirting with Harry and Ron! And the boys seemed to be enjoying it, too.

Now, putting aside my jealousy of Lavender flirting with Ron, let's consider why this doesn't make much sense. First of all, last I had heard, Lavender was going steady with Seamus. Parvati was still holding a grudge against Harry since the ball from the year before. Third, I thought Harry had a crush on Cho.

I came in, but didn't make a scene. What was I supposed to say? Stop flirting with my friends? Then people would know for sure I had a crush on at least one of them.

I sighed rather loudly as I sat down. Ron looked up, and looked rather shame-faced. It was as if he was ashamed to be caught flirting with someone as silly as Lavender. It's probably more likely he doesn't want me to know he likes her! Waaaah! Why can't he like me? I want him to like me! He likes Lavender, I can tell! I hate her, I hate her! Hermione! Calm down! You shouldn't hate anyone; Lavender and Ron aren't trying to hurt you. Though Lavender might be trying to hurt Seamus....

Finally we arrived at Hogwarts.

"'Arry, you alright?" came Hagrid's cheerful voice, "Ron? Hermione? Good ter see you again, I 'ad a great summer! 'Tell you 'bout it later"

"Hi Hagrid!" we yelled back, and then headed for the carriages.

The feast went well; the prefects and Head Boy and Girl left early to get the passwords and the new prefects were given instructions. Dean and I led the first years up to the Gryffindor common room. It was our first duty as prefects. As we walked I answered questions about wizards and Hogwarts to those who were muggle born or didn't know much about the school. I explained about the Fat Lady before saying the password ("flutterby") and letting them in. Dean showed the boys their dorm and I showed the girls theirs. I explained the common room rules and the dorm room rules. They mostly seemed like a pretty good bunch of first years.

I left them to go to bed and walked back down to the common room. The fires were lit and the room seemed cleaner than it ever was the rest of the year. I immediately thought of the slaves doing all this work. During the year before and during the summer I had written many letters to Ministry officials trying to convince them that House-Elves should be given rights. Out of the twenty-seven letters I owled to people, only one bothered to even respond. She said, quite kindly actually, that most House-Elves liked to be "enslaved" and that working for wizards and witches was what they enjoyed doing.

I don't think any one else understands that they have feelings too. They deserve to be treated in the range of their intelligence. Humph!

I saw Katie laughing and talking with Angelina and Fred. I was feeling tired, but I was a prefect and needed to make sure my duties were completed before turning in. I walked towards them and Fred spotted me.

"Oy! It's Herm!"

"Fred! I hate it when you call me that." He and George had been doing this since I arrived at the Burrow.

"Call you what?" he asked innocently.

"You know that I don't like to be called 'Herm.' I hate nicknames!" The whole common room was watching now.

"But, that wasn't what I came over for." I took a deep breath to calm my anger; find my center. "I wanted to ask you, Katie, if there was anything else that I needed to do--as a prefect--before I go to bed."

"Oh, umm, I don't think so," Katie replied, "Go on to bed if you want, I think everything has been taken care of."

"Thank you, Katie. Good night, everyone."

Finally I was in my dorm, in my bed, trying to sleep.

Sept. 18^th:

The days went by quickly. We adjusted to being back at school faster than usual. I was, of course, studying hard. The OWLs were coming soon, for goodness sakes! We had to study harder than ever before. Yes, You-Know-Who was around somewhere, but we had to get on with our lives. I wanted a good job, a good life; I needed to succeed in school to do this. Harry and Ron weren't too happy with my voracious studying. I had checked out several books on studying for the OWLs and read and took notes on them every spare moment I had.

This was proving almost as busy a year as my third had been. There were my regular classes, my prefect duties, worrying about Harry and Voldemort, studying for the OWLs, and, still, worrying about my relationship with Ron. I didn't seem to be able to get over him. Also, Lavender and Parvati were driving me insane! They were constantly giggling and fixing themselves up. Talking about snogging boys in broom closets and how Parvati could hook up with This Handsome Boy and That Cute Boy or That Other Manly, Tough One. Good grief! Lavender flirted with other boys, but at least she mostly stays with Seamus (aka, a few quick snogs, here and there). I thought I was going to die!

I didn't think I could take much more of this. It was horrible having to live with them all the time. And it wasn't been any better with my other friends. Harry was mooning after Cho, Ginny was mooning over him, and Ron was mooning over somebody (Lavender, perhaps? I have no idea). It seems the whole of Hogwarts had been caught by the love-bug this year. Or maybe it's just that everyone in my classes is fifteen and the boys' hormones have caught up with the girls'.

I am enjoying my classes; we are learning quite fascinating things. At first it was just review, like it is every year the first week of school, but now it is very interesting. Tomorrow will be my birthday. I'll be sixteen! I can't believe it! It seems just the other day I was ten.

Another new thing of this year is that we have a new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. Of course, this isn't really new because we've had a new teacher every single year. The difference is that she is a woman! Finally! Professor Edlen is a really good teacher. She is like Professor Lupin and Professor McGonagall rolled into one. She looks Hispanic; wavy black hair and tannish-brown skin. She is really tall, about six feet tall would be my guess. I have no idea how old she is; she looks young, but has so much experience. Defense Against the Dark Arts is now my second favorite class (Arithmancy being my first). DADA is Harry and Ron's favorite class, but then it has been since third year.

September 20^th:

My birthday came, and Ron actually remembered it this year! All the other years (except first year) he has said something like, "I knew it was in September, but I couldn't remember the date...and you know...I'll get you something soon..." and then usually forgets again. But this time Harry and Ron both got me gifts on the right day, and even got Dobby to make me a cake!!! I can't believe it! It was a great day, except that Lavender was being really mean to me. She didn't used to be so mean to me; I don't understand what has gotten into her. I don't particularly like Lavender, but I'm not mean to her, at least I don't think I am.

This was probably the best birthday I've had since I came to Hogwarts. Everyone but Lavender has just been so nice! Most of Gryffindor has said happy birthday to me, and most of the Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs in our year have too. I have no idea how most of these people found out it was my birthday. I felt popular for the first time in my whole life!

Another great thing about this year is having Ginny as a friend. I haven't had any close girlfriends for ages. Most of the girls dislike me because I won't conform to their standards. Ginny accepts me for who I am, and I am able to tell her things I can't tell Harry and Ron. For instance, how much my cramps are killing me! Why does my period always have to happen on my birthday? But, Ginny taught me a spell for easing the cramps. It's amazing; all the books I've read and they didn't have this spell in them! Ginny says her mom taught her. I guess that's what's expected so they don't put it in books.

Every day that we have Potions, at least Harry or Ron will get detention...usually it's both. Malfoy is worse than ever. He is still angry that Harry won the Tri-Wizard tournament and that Harry got away from the Death Eaters last year. At least Rita Skeeter isn't bothering us anymore. She still works for the Daily Prophet, but only writes little columns about the weather or other things with straight facts. She knows I'm watching her!

Harry is doing a lot better. Some of Cedric's friends (including Cho), came up to Harry and told him that they did not blame him at all. Gareth Ferron and Cho had tears in their eyes when they talked to him.

September 27^th:

Quidditch trials were yesterday for Keeper. Ron, Dean, and Ginny all tried out. Yesterday, Harry kept hinting that Ron was going to get it, but we didn't find out who really got it until today. We threw Ron a mini party to celebrate his success. It has been a long time since I've seen Ron that ecstatic! He was just so thrilled. "This is almost as good as the day Malfoy became the Amazing Bouncing Ferret!" He had said. Everyone laughed at that.

I am already getting sick of prefect meetings, and I've only been to three. There's another one tomorrow. It's not that I don't like being a prefect, but the meetings are so boring--we never get anything useful done. All people do is complain about people who won't listen to them. And then we have to talk about how to take charge and make people listen with out being bossy and mean...and other things like that.

September 30^th:

Dumbledore announced today that, "Due to the success and popularity of the Yule Ball last year, we will have a Halloween Dance this year. Third year and above are invited, but no one need feel forced to attend. It will not be as fancy as the Yule Ball was."

This was met by loud cheering from many, but a few booed. I didn't respond. On normal occasions I might have thought of booing, but wouldn't have because it was rude. I have never enjoyed large party-type situations. I had not enjoyed the Yule Ball the year before very much. I had liked that I was pretty and that somebody fancied me, but I hadn't actually enjoyed most of the ball. I wouldn't go this time unless Ron asked me, and I knew he wouldn't. If I knew he would, then I would be cheering with the rest.

After the announcement, Harry and Ron were whispering to each other. Ron was bright red. Probably trying to figure out how to snag Cho for Harry and some other pretty girl for Ron. Sheesh! Boys!

October 17^th:

Everyone is going crazy about the dance coming up. It's even worse than last year it seems! I'm trying to convince Harry to give up on Cho (he still hasn't asked her) and ask Ginny instead. He hasn't taken me up on it yet. Sigh... Ron hasn't asked anyone either. Lavender is going with Seamus, of course, and Parvati is going with Gareth Ferron! He is the most popular Hufflepuff and is in his 7^th year. Neville isn't going with anyone yet. Oh, and Dean came out to everyone as gay in September. And he has a boyfriend now. Someone from Ravenclaw, I think he's a year under us. I think it's great that Dean trusted us enough to tell us.

The interesting thing is that, after he came out, Harry seemed to be very carefully watching Ron, Ginny, and my reactions. I started to think that he might be gay...but he likes Cho. Maybe he's bi? I don't know. It could have just been my imagination. Ron was surprised and acted weird around Dean for a few days, but soon got used to it. Especially after I told him to stop acting like a homophobic bigot! That wasn't nice of me, I know, but he was acting like a jerk. I mean, seriously, acting like Dean was going to come on to him or something; he doesn't act that way about straight girls! I think he did finally realize that Dean was not going to act any different, that Dean wasn't going to do something to him just because he was gay and in the same dorm!

Any how, I got 103% on my Transfiguration exam and McGonagall has never given extra credit to anyone before! I still can't believe that I did so well! McGonagall also asked me to tutor some younger students who were having trouble turning their lightning bugs into lanterns. I feel so happy! I am doing so well in classes; of course, I am studying just about every free moment I have.

October 18^th:

Ron has been acting very strange lately; I think he's going to ask a girl to the dance, and is trying to get up his nerve. I finally decided to ask him today, what was up with him.

"Ron, are you alright? I mean you've acting kind of...strange lately. Are trying to ask a girl to the dance?" He didn't respond, just kind of looked a bit stunned, "Or something..." I tried to think fast, "I mean, I noticed you were acting weird, and I just wanted to know, you know, why." Why did I have to act so stupid around Ron?

"Oh, Hermione, um...sorry, I hadn't realized I was so obvious." He covered his mouth with his hand (at least he was talking now), "I mean, um, well, I guess you hit the target. I am trying to get brave enough to ask someone to the dance."

Damn! I thought, he is trying to ask someone. Damn it! I felt tears starting to well up; be strong Hermione, don't you dare cry, now! "Oh, well, why don't you ask her?"

"I'm, um, scared she'll turn me down." He blushed (he's so adorable!). I was sorry he was so embarrassed though.

"If you don't think she'll go with you, then she's obviously not worth your time, Ron. If you want to go with someone to this silly dance, than go with someone who likes you. But if you insist on whoever this mysterious girl is, than ask her soon, before it's too late."

"I suppose you're right as usual, Hermione." He blushed and stared at the ground for awhile before breaking the uncomfortable silence, "Um, Hermione, I, um, well, that is...I've been wanting to...um...oh never mind!" He was bright red, poor Ronniekins. Wait, did I just think "Ronniekins?"

"Oh, Ron, you know you can tell me anything. I'm your friend!"

"I know, it's just, well, this is kind of different..."

"Are you trying to tell me about this girl?"

"Well, sort of...it's just that, it's about..." Just then Harry walked in. Darn it! Ron was about to tell me whatever it is, about this girl or something.

"Hey! How's it going?" Harry said cheerfully. We both just looked at him. I looked annoyed at being interrupted and Ron's face was still red, he looked both relieved and annoyed. "Oh," Harry said, "I'm sorry, did I interrupt something?"

"Well, not really, Ron was just going to tell me about this girl he wants to ask to the dance. I know that you know who it is already because you two are always whispering to each other these days!" I was being mean and bossy again. Ron turned bright red, and even Harry blushed a bit.

"Oh, so I was interrupting something!" Harry said, he seemed to signaling me with something in his voice. I gave him a quizzical look back. Ron glared at Harry and turned even brighter a red.

"I don't see why he still can't tell me, since you already know!" I said. But before either of them could respond to that, a group of second years trooped in.

October 19^th:

I knew there wasn't and wouldn't be any romance in our friendship, but this didn't stop the slight jolt of electricity I got whenever we touched. I was careful about what I said and how I acted; I couldn't let him know that I liked him. I was careful about what I might do that could ruin our friendship. There were certain things that I couldn't ask, not without doing something that could hurt our relationship. I didn't ask Ron again who he fancied. He didn't ask me who I liked either. It was fair.

Ron seemed to be being extra careful about getting me angry. He apologized as soon as he did something that upset me, and tried hard to keep his own temper in check. I was glad of this, and because of the effort he was making, I made an effort too. Harry told us that we were more pleasant for him to be around, and that other people had said the same thing to him. This hurt a little bit; to know that people hadn't wanted us around before. I know that it was really only when we were fighting, but still, it doesn't feel good to know that.

I think I will go mad with all this giggling. I am about ready to kill Lavender and Parvati as they go on and on and on about what they are going to wear to the dance, how they're going to do their hair, what their dates might wear, how their going to do their make-up, etc... THEY ARE DRIVING ME CRAZY!!! Every day at least two people ask me if I'm going to the dance. It's even worse at prefect meetings because we have to design the decorations and are in charge of making the menu and hiring the music. I thought being a prefect was about making sure people followed the rules, setting a good example, and helping other students when they need help. Not preparing for dances! I might just go insane.

October 20^th:

Ron wasn't working, as usual, and I knew he had a Potions essay due in two days that he hadn't even started.

"Ron! Ron Weasley! You really should work on your potions essay! You know its due in two days, and I know you'll need help on it. I'll help you tonight, I finished it four days ago, and I just completed my Astronomy chart so I'm free."

"But Hermione, I'm in the middle of a game--Ginny's winning, too! I can do it tomorrow."

"Well, you won't get any help from me tomorrow. It's tonight, or not at all. I even have checked out some books for you. You should be thanking me, not complaining to me. Anyhow, I have a prefect's meeting tomorrow, I won't be around." Just then Harry walked in, grinning broadly. It reminded me that, "And Ron, don't you have Quidditch practice tomorrow?"

"Oh yeah, I suppose I do...but can't I just finish this game?"

"Ron..." I said warningly.

"Alright, alright. Rain check, Ginny?" he said.

"Oh, alright, I suppose I should finish my Mandrake report for Herbology." Ginny replied.

Harry sauntered up to us. He had been getting a book on Transfiguration out of the library.

"What are you so happy about?" I asked, in a bad mood because Ron hadn't been grateful to me for helping.

"Oh...nothing..." he said with a dreamy smile, "I just did something I meant to do earlier..."

"You asked Cho to the dance?" Ron asked.

Harry blushed, "Well, yes." I glared at him, as Ginny ran out of the room. I was pretty sure she was crying.

"What?" Harry asked.

"You are so dense, Harry! Can't you see that you just broke someone's heart?" I asked. "Ginny loves you completely, and you don't even see her. Cho may be pretty and a Seeker, but do you see anything else? Yes, she's probably smart since she's in Ravenclaw, but you don't see that, do you? I will never understand how people can only see how someone looks, and not the type of person they are...why can't you see that? Ginny is one of the nicest people I know, and she is beautiful as well. She is perfect for you, she plays Quidditch also, you know that. Your personalities are perfect. You don't know almost anything about Cho. How can you say you're in-love when you don't even know the person?" I had my rant. I grabbed my books and took off after Ginny, to comfort her. How could Harry be such a jerk? I could understand if, for whatever reason, he didn't feel romantically about her, but he hadn't even looked at her. He had never seen past "Ron's little sister." Never seen how smart, talented, and kind she was. I knew, in my heart, that they were perfect for each other.