Black Lily

Chapter Eight

Wolves Together

She only came around when some one splashed water onto her face. Really, really cold water. She spluttered, and snapped out a hand, grabbing the person by the front of their clothes. Opening her eyes, she stared into Remus's amber eyes. He smiled, and growled softly.

"Nice to see you back with us." He took her hands, and helped her up. She growled back.

"How long was I out for?"

"Oh, ten minutes. Did you know you snore?" she gave a bark of a laugh, tossing her head back. It was still raining. She tilted her head back further and opened her mouth, catching the rain drops. Remus laughed, and copied her. A quiet voice spoke behind them.

"Can we join in, or is it a strictly wolves thing?" Lily lowered her head, and turned. James, Sirius and Sev' stood, looking at them. She smiled.

"Of course you can. As though I would exclude my friends from anything." Sev' grinned, shaking rain water out of his hair. Lily looked at James. He had removed his glasses and used an Oculus charm, because rain water clouded up his glasses. With out them, he looked totally different. In a strictly good way. She smiled, darted forward, and closed her hand over his wrist. He laughed, and swung her up into his arms. Her head spun, and she closed her eyes, pressing her face against his chest.

"Hey, you ok?" she nodded. "You sure?" she nodded again.

"Yeah. Just... dizzy." James nodded, and walked back over to the tree where Abby and Peter were sitting. Abby picked up the flask, and poured out a mug of the dark, creamy hot chocolate, and handed it to Lily. She smiled her thanks, and took a sip.

"Mmmm... not as effective as coffee, but still. Mmmm." Abby grinned.

"I though that you'd say some thing like that. What happened? Was it... again?" She looked at Lily with concern in her warm brown eyes. Lily raised an eyebrow.

"I don't believe you'd be shocked if it was."

"Well, it has happened before," Abby said, speaking softly.

"How do you spell 'duh'?" Peter smiled, a little nervously.

"Well, we know she's alright; she's being cynical." Lily grinned at him, and drained the hot chocolate, licking her lips to catch any stray drops. She looked back out to the area around the lake. Remus, Sirius and Sev' were still running around, trying to catch rain water in their mouths, banging into each other every so often because they weren't looking where they were going. Looking through the corner of her vision, she looked at James. Some thing was definitely wrong with her head. Since when did she notice his hands, or the way his hair stuck up at the back in a way that screamed for some one to try to flatten it, or that he always smiled more on one side of his mouth then the other? Or that the glasses hid his eyes almost completely, so no one really saw that they changed colours with his mood, from hazel when he was in a neutral mood, to deep brown when he was angry or passionate, to an almost amber colour when he was happy. Like now. She shook the thoughts off; it wasn't right that she thought these things about a friend. Even if their friendship had come after they had slept together. She stood up, stretching. James frowned at her; he thought that she should be resting, obviously. Well, she didn't take orders from any body. Tossing her plaits, she began running towards the cliff that hung over the lake. She wanted to see what her body would do if she dived off it. James yelled after her, but she ignored him. Why should she listen? He was just trying to control her, like every one else. Just as she reached the edge, a pair of arms wrapped around her waist, and dragged her back.

Remus yanked her away, and when Lily struggled around, she found pure fury blazing in his eyes.

"Are you mad? What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Lily tried to pull herself out of his arms, but he was stronger then her, no matter how strong she was.

"Let me go!"

"Not if you're going to bloody run and kill your self!" He glared down at her, and didn't even flinch when Lily snarled at him. She struggled, scrapping her nails down his arms. Panic was welling up inside her; she hated being closed in and restricted. She bared her teeth at him.

"Let go of me you bastard!!"

"Not unless you promise not to do anything stupid!" She snarled at him.

"I don't do stupid things; I do every thing for a reason!"
"So you just off cliffs for what reason exactly? Fun?" She couldn't take it any more. Her gums were prickling in a way that told her that she once again had fangs.

"Remus, let me go, now!"

"No!" With a low growl, she lunged forward and sank her fangs into the join of his neck and shoulder. The werewolf yelped, and let her go. She staggered back, horrified. What have I don't?? She thought wildly. The taste of blood was strong in her mouth and on her lips. She could feel it run off her fangs. Remus stared at her with disbelief, a hand clamped over the bite. She wiped the back of her hand across her mouth slowly, and then stared at the dark red staining her hand.

"Remus..."

"You... You bit me..."

"I, I didn't mean to... it just... happened..." he shook his head, just staring at her. That look in his eyes, of disbelief, horror, and... fascination. Tears began to cloud her vision, and she tore away from him, running back to the castle. Hands caught her bay the arms, and spun her around. For a moment, she looked back at a horrified Sirius, staring at the blood encrusting her mouth, before she tore away from him and sped to the castle, running as fast as her wolf form, sobbing brokenly.

*

It was dark in her sitting room, but she hadn't tried to light a fire or one of her light globes. She had curled up in a ball on one of her purple armchairs, and stared at the vague outline of her hands for hours. She had bitten Remus, so hard that he had bled. She still had the copper tang of blood in her mouth, no matter how many times she had cleaned her teeth and thrown up. She looked out of the window; it was the full moon. A whole month had passed with out her noticing it, and that meant... God that meant that tomorrow was Christmas day. A howl pierced the darkness. She stared out at the moon.

"Remus..." Another howl rang out, mournful this time; wolves hated to sing alone. A different howl echoed, but it wasn't the same. A dog howling just wasn't the same. Before she realized what she was doing, she was at the window, listening. The howl rang out again.

"Pack Sister! Where are you?" Her heart ached. Nimbly, she grasped the vine that grew up the side of the castle, and began to scramble down, ignoring that fact that she was facing a drop that would kill her or at least paralyze her if she fell. She landed on her feet in a crouch, swiftly changing into the wolf.

Ulv pricked her ears up, listening for the howl. She heard it. Picking up her feet, she ran as fast as she could for the forest, panting slightly. She plunged into the trees, dodging them, scrabbling slightly as she tripped on a protruding root. She knew that she must be quite far into the forest by now, as the moon wasn't visible half as much as before. She inhaled, smelling out the werewolf, dog and stag. There they were. She followed it, running faster. Finally, she burst into a clearing and threw herself at the large form of the werewolf.

"Moony!"

"Li...Ulv! My god, you came!"

"I couldn't stay away." He growled softly, nuzzling her neck, while she returned the gesture. She head butted him playfully, and then turned as there was a soft whine from behind them. She looked into the pale eyes of a huge black dog.

"Is that only something for wolves, or any creature?" she didn't answer, just leapt on him and licked his muzzle until laughter echoed in her mind. Finally, Padfoot pushed her off, and nudged her in Prongs direction. Ulv looked up into the stag's large, drop eyes.

"... Prongs..."

"Ulv." His voice was cool and restrained. Ulv flinched.

"Please, don't be angry with me. Moony isn't."

"Moony is good at forgiving people. You bit him Ulv. He was bleeding really badly." She whined softly.

"Do you not think I would take it back if I could? I regret doing that so much! Do you know how many times I threw up, trying to get rid of that taste?" he turned his head, not listening. Ulv growled in despair. Once more, words whispered through her mind, and she echoed them. Her spine prickled uncomfortably. She closed her eyes painfully, the feeling spreading through her body. A sharp yelp made her open her eyes. Padfoot was staring at her, pale eyes wide as they could go. Prongs just stared at her. Their eyes were much closer in height now.

"What?"

"Holy fuck... how did you do that?"

"Do what?"

"You... You don't know what you are?" she snorted with contempt.

"If I knew, I wouldn't ask, would I?"

"You're... a deer."

"Bollocks, what's wrong really?" Moony looked at her sorrowfully. His voice sounded gruffer then before, more like a growl, and as though she was farther away from him then she was.

"I guess you can't hear me any more then."

"I can hear you, but can only answer through telepathy." The wolf nodded. Ulv looked down at her little cloven feet, puzzled. "What I want to know, is how did this happen?"

"No idea. You were probably just so desperate to get through to Prongs that you turned yourself into something that could interact with him."

"Sometimes, Moony, you are too smart for your own good." The werewolf growled good naturedly, and Ulv realized that Prongs was still staring at her. She lowered her eyes, and pawed the ground gently. When she raised her head, the stag lowered his head regally.

"I always said that you were a posh git Prongs." The huge black dog howled with laughter. Prongs glared at him, but his eyes were shining slightly with amusement. She took a step closer, and touched her nose to his neck.

"Hey. Remember me?"

"Could any one forget you?" happiness threaded through her; James had forgiven her. Whoa, wait a minute, since when did I go into raptures over James Potter?? Her mind in turmoil, she stared into the trees for a moment. Maybe because you think that there's a reason to do so, whispered the evil little voice in her mind. Oh, shut up, she though back viciously. A sharp poke in her side brought her back to her senses. Prongs looked at her indulgently.

"Day dreaming were you Ulv my love?"

"Indeed so Prongs my darling. So, what's on the agenda for tonight?" Padfoot looked evil.

"Wouldn't you like to know?"

"Well, yeah, actually, I would."

"Well you would, wouldn't you?"

*

A giggle was what woke her the next morning. Slowly, she opened her eyes, groaned, and buried her face in the person's - who she was sitting on- chest. Wait, chest?? With a snap, her eyes were open, and she found that she was curled up in James's lap. She sat up sharply; she was angry with him! Then she remembered last night, and flopped back against him, causing him to groan with protest.

"Oh shut up Potter, I'm not hurting you." A smile washed fleetingly over the raven haired Gryffindor's face, and he opened his eyes, and then grinned.

"Once again, I speak of the joys of being woken by you."

"Ha ha heh." She returned the grin. A small cough came from the direction of the giggle, and Lily turned her head to find her friends standing grinning at them. After one look at Sev', she burst into laughter, and would have fallen off James's lap if he hadn't grabbed her. Sev' scowled, and tugged at the tinsel necklace he wore.

"Don't laugh; they made me wear it!" Falcon raised his eyebrows, and shifted the large present he was carrying to the other arm.

"Oh, and we made you bounce along the halls singing 'deck the halls' 'have yourself a merry little Christmas' and 'Silent night'?" the blush on the Slytherins face and neck would have done tribute to a rose. Abby smiled, and fiddled with the lametta that she had woven into her two plaits.

"Happy Christmas Lils'." Lily looked at them sharply, and realized that they were each carrying presents. A name label caught her eye: For our Lili; remember, that no matter who or where you are, we love you. She looked at them, stunned.

"Oh my god you guys..." She leapt off James's lap, and rushed over to them, hugging each of them tightly. Sev' grinned, hugging her back when she reached him, swinging her round in his old way.

"We're only doing so much love."

"You mean you're only doing too much! I love you all!" A drawling voice came from behind them.

"Do excuse me while I throw up what remains in my stomach from last night..." Lily grinned, not letting go of Sev'.

"Oh shut up Padfoot you git."

"Shut up yourself Ulv or you're not getting my present."

"...Present? Shit Sirius, tell me you didn't." the Animagus grinned sheepishly. Lily looked at the other Marauders suspiciously. "You two, tell me you didn't get me something too. Please?" They looked away. Lily pressed her hands to her burning cheeks. "You're all bloody mad!" Sev' slung an arm around her shoulders, and hugged her gently.

"We're all mad because we all love you. Does that make sense to you?"

~

James looked through the draw of his bureau, pushing the Marauders map aside impatiently, then lifted out a little box wrapped with pale blue tissue paper. Ok James, the thought firmly, this is the moment of truth. Are you ready? No, I didn't think so. He smiled slightly, and then practically ran back down stairs. Lily was sitting in the middle of a pile of wrapping paper, laughing, and her green eyes shining. For a moment, he stood, mesmerized. How was it possible for one person to be so beautiful? She was looking at a charm bracelet on her arm, holding her wrist above her head. He came to his senses, and jumped off the last three steps, landing neatly on his feet, and then falling over. A soft, melodious sound started, increasing in volume; Lily was laughing again.

"God James! Can't you stay upright for ten seconds?" He grinned, and, just to prove some point that even he didn't know, crawled over to her. She grinned, and giggled, throwing balls of wrapping paper at Sirius as the boy lovingly fingered the black dog collar he had been given. He coughed, giving Remus and Sirius meaningful looks when they looked at him. Making excuses, they bustled the Slytherin, Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff out of the room. Lily got up to follow them, but he pulled her back down. There was a lump in his throat, and he swallowed to clear it; it didn't help. Lily raised her eyebrows at him.

"You want something Prongs? Or are you just holding my hand for the sake of it?" to his embarrassment, he felt his cheeks heating up and he knew he was blushing. A certain red head raised her eyebrows even higher, a small smile playing on her full lips.

"Is James blushing? I think he is." He glared at her, then smiled slightly. She was only teasing him, after all. He stroked her back of her hand with the pad of his thumb, feeling the little shiver that went through her.

"And if I am? What does it matter?" He liked watching her writhe slightly.

"Ok James.... It doesn't matter... so, why am I still here?" He took a deep breath, turned her hand over, and placed the little box in her hand. She looked at it, confusion in her eyes.

"James, what is this? It isn't going to explode in my face, is it?" He smiled; it was a typical reaction from any one who received a box from a Marauder; ask whether it would explode.

"Why don't you open it and see?" she looked at him warily, and peeled back the pale blue tissue paper, smiling slightly.

"I didn't know that you could choose tasteful colours; I would have expected bright orange and purple from some one like you."

"Oh, thank you so much, I'm sure." Her eyes widened at the black jewellery box with the golden phoenix image embossed on it. Her eyes rose to meet James's.

"James... what...?" He rested a hand on top of the box. The time had come to see whether she had changed her mind about him.

"Lily, I've, I've been meaning to ask you this for a while... a lot of things have happened since the start of term, and I know that at on point I really screwed up royally," he winced at the bad use of words, and looked at her apologetically, then continued, "But some things have happened since then... and... Look, what I'm trying to say is..." why was he stumbling over his words?? He had NEVER done that when asking a girl out before! Lily halted him when he tried to start again.

"James, are you trying to ask me out in a really round about, obviously thought out then forgotten way?" Of course, Lily would guess what was going on in his mind. He smiled sheepishly.

"...Yeah... so... Will you?" For a moment, a scornful sneer passed over her face, her lip curling with distaste. James's heart sank; of course she was going to say no, what else would she say? You didn't go out with some one after despising them for seven years. Suddenly, a brilliant grin lit her face, and James realised that she had been tricking him.

"It took you long enough to ask, didn't it? Of course I will stupid!" A little coil of warmth started in the pit of James's stomach, and wound its way upward, spreading through his whole body. She had said yes!! He cleared his throat, and stood up.

"Do excuse me for this, won't you?" with out waiting for an answer, he ran to the window and leaned out of it. "YES!! SHE SAID YES!!! LILY EVANS IS MY GIRLFRIEND!!!" Lily burst out laughing behind him. He turned back to her, grinning, and knelt in front of her, picking up the box.

"So, I finally get to find out what's in this thing, do I?"

"Yeah." He hesitated a moment, then opened it. Lily's mouth opened slightly, and a tiny gasp could just be heard. James took that as a good thing.

"Oh my god... James..." He smiled, and pried the delicate ring out of its nest of velvet. He had spent ages trying to find this. The claddagh ring nestled in his large brown paw, the crown, hands and heart glimmering innocently. He had had to bribe Abby to steal one of Lily's rings so that he could get one that fit her. Lily's slender, pale fingers reached for it, then hesitated. He lifted it out of his hand, and slipped it onto her ring finger. It fitted.

"Don't worry, by the way, it won't hurt Moony; Platinum, not silver." Lily squeaked.

"Platinum??? Are you mad? I can't take this!" he stilled her hand, which was trying to take the ring off.

"Yes, you can. I have too much money, and nothing sensible to spend it on. Please." Slowly, the red head smiled, and nodded. He smiled back, not noticing that he was still holding her hand.

"Oh for fucks sake, just kiss her!!" James's head snapped around, just in time to see Abby pushing Sirius through the door.

"You idiot! That was so romantic and you RUINED it!" James laughed, and squeezed Lily's hand.

~

"Abby, I won't tell you what happened again! You've made me tell you at least nine times! It's Boxing Day; leave me in peace for ten seconds!" The blonde pouted, but satisfied her need for romance by admiring the ring on Lily's left hand. Lily just let her, idly spinning her quill in her hand, and then turned the page of her book. The library was silent, and for once in her life Lily was glad to be able to just sit and read. She looked up as Remus whispered 'hello' and sat down at their table, dumping his bag on the floor. He smiled at her.

"What are you reading?" Lily showed him the cover.

"Muggle book by Dorothy L. Sayers. It's called 'Have His Carcase." Remus raised his eye brows.

"I can read you know. Go on, read me a bit." Lily pulled her hand away from a protesting Abby, and flicked back a few pages. Remus smiled as her voice changed with the characters, her usual voice for Harriet Vane, and an aristocratic, Queens English voice for Lord Peter Wimsey.

"'How in the world,' demanded Harriet, 'Did you get here?'

'Car,' said Lord Peter, briefly. 'Have they produced the body?'

'Who told you about the body?'

'I nosed it from afar. Where the carcase is, there shall be eagles gathered together. May I join you over the bacon- and- eggs?'

'By all means,' said Harriet. 'Where did you come from?'

'From London- like the bird that hears the call of its mate.'

'I didn't-' began Harriet.

'I didn't mean you. I meant the corpse. But still, talking of mates, will you marry me?'

'Certainly not.'

'I thought not, but I felt I might as well ask the question. Did you say they had found the body?'" Lily looked up, and smiled. Remus smiled back.

"When you're done with that Lils, may I borrow it? It sounds alright."

"Take what you will Lancelot, take what you will." With a sigh, she snapped the book shut; she was restless again. "I say, Remus old boy," Abby grinned as she spoke in the aristocrats way that she used sometimes, "Could you tell me where that lad of mine has got to?"

"I really couldn't say. What say you, I and the fair lady here go in search of said lad?"

"Ripping good idea old chap." Abby was now biting her knuckles to stifle her laughs. Madame Pince looked at them with raised eyebrows, and then smiled thinly; she had always been fond of Lily, and rarely ever told her off. Lily stuffed her book into her back, and jumped up, smoothing her skirt and robes. A twinge ran through the scar that trailed down over her eye. She frowned, and ran a finger down it slowly. That was... odd, to say the least. She shook the strange feeling in her stomach off; it was nothing. She bounced out of the library in her usual way, Remus and Abby following.

Out in the corridor, she looked one way, then the other, before turning the way she had looked in first and walking down the corridor, stopping so that she could link arms with her two friends. Just as they were about to turn a corner, James, Sirius, Peter, Falcon and Sev' came running around the corner. Lily's eyebrows rose when she saw what James was clutching.

"And what pray, my darling, have you got there?" James's cheeks became hued with pink.

"We, ah.... We found this..." Bashfully, he held the bag out to her. She took it.

"Remind me to tell you why you don't go through my stuff, ok sweetie?" He nodded, looking at the bag with interest.

"So... what's in the bag anyway? We couldn't get it open." Lily looked down at the plain, black bag in her hands, stroking the worn leather slightly. She hadn't opened this for almost a year. She sighed, and turned, walking rapidly towards the currently empty Hall. Once there, she laid the bag on the Prefects table, sat in front of it, and sat staring at it. A large, warm hand rested on her shoulder, and a little thrill ran through her body; James.

"Well? Are you going to open it?" Lily swallowed, and pulled out her wand, tapped the zip, and slowly drew it back, listening to the drawn out rasping sound of the bag opening. Squeezing her shoulder slight, James sat beside her, and pulled the bag toward him after giving her a questioning glance and receiving an agreeing one in return. He pushed it open, and pulled the contents out of it. He picked up a pale pink slipper shoe with two silky ribbons sewn to it.

"What is this?" Lily smiled slightly.

"My Mam has made me go to ballet since I was three; it's a ballet shoe." James raised his eyebrows, and tapped the toes against the table. They made a thunking sound.

"Those cannot be comfortable." Lily rolled her eyes.

"Their block shoes, so I can stand en Pointe. I haven't danced in a year though; it doesn't really fit in with my image, does it?" Although her friends tried to look as though they understood, the confusion in their eyes made it evident they had no idea what ballet was; they had all been brought up in all wizarding households, and ballet was Muggle dance. With a sigh, Lily kicked off her school shoes, and picked up the ballet shoes, slipping her feet into them and quickly wrapping the ribbons around her ankles, tying them tightly. Sirius raised his eyebrows.

"You're serious; you are going to stand on your toes in those things. Bloody hell." Abby nodded.

"Wouldn't you need really strong ankles?" Lily stood up, pointing her feet delicately to get her feet used to the shoes.

"Exactly, that's why I've only been allowed to go on point for five or six years." Balancing her weight by resting her hand on the table top, she sprang onto her toes, all the training she had done rushing through her. Her eyes half closed, lost in memory, she began to dance.

*

When term started again, and the seventh years began their NEWT course work, the only reason that Lily did any of her work was because Sev' learnt to stick her to a chair, so she had nothing better to do then do her work. She grumbled, but did the work.

She read through what was she had just written of her Potions essay, and dotted a full stop. The moonlight streamed through her open window, lighting her room with a pearly glow. She rubbed her eyes and blew out her candle, then stood and straightened her black, strap sleeved pyjama top and loose white pyjama trousers, then went and sat on her window seat, looking out into the diamond studded sky, twisting her ring around her finger. Small curls had fallen out of her high, scruffy ponytail, and tickled her neck gently.

Arms encircled her waist, and soft lips touched the sensitive skin below her ear. She smiled, and leaned back.

"Hello James. What brings you to my room in the middle of the night?" she tilted her head to one side as he nuzzled her throat.

"Oh, no reason. Well, other then the fact I am going mad because the most beautiful creature on the planet is in the room across from mine, with only a little common room to separate us..." She wriggled around, and slid her arms around his neck, and kissed him gently. With a moan he swung her up into his arms and kissed her back passionately, trailing kisses down her neck and across her collar bone. She bit her lip slightly.

"I get the feeling that you are feeling a little repressed James..."

"You drive me crazy, you bloody female!" She giggled, and ran a fingertip down the back of his neck. With a groan, he carried her across the room and laid her on her bed, leaning over her.

"Do you have any idea what you are doing Lily?" She grabbed his shoulders, and yanked him down, kissing his neck.

"I have an idea... don't come into my room in the middle of the night wearing only your pyjama bottoms and expect to get away Scott free." James growled faintly, low in his throat, closing his eyes tightly as though trying to control himself.

"Ah, fuck it!" his lips crushed hers, his hands moving up her waist. Lily stifled a moan as his fingertips grazed her breasts. God, did he have any idea...?

"Bastard..." She murmured around his mouth. As an answer, he ran the tip of his tongue over her lower lip, barely touching her mouth. She jerked him back down, biting his mouth. Pushing his shoulders, she rolled him over and straddled his hips, smiling wickedly. He looked up at her, one eyebrow raised. He definitely looks better with those contacts, she thought randomly. He ran his hands up her sides slowly, the material of her top wrinkling slightly. Lily pushed his hands away and yanked it off over her head, throwing it into some random corner of the room. His eyes widened slightly, darkening to a deep brown as he ran his eyes over her. Placing her hands either side of his head, she leaned down and kissed him, barely hearing his murmur.

"I love you..."