Harry Potter and the Dragon

XIV

Fury on Four Legs

Harry was walking as fast as he could, carefully seeking the shelter of the trees, Ron bouncing in his pocket. "...So you say this road leads to a village ...Well, I hope that flying plonker's not aware of that... What if he comes back and catches sight of us from the sky?"

"He won't. Believe me, I know him," voiced the cup through the pocket hole. "When he goes out flying, he usually takes his time. He always goes out at night, though. This is the first time I've seen him leaving the manor at this hour of the day... He's quite stupid, but not so stupid as to go and risk being spotted by the villagers... Well, I guess this time he's really pissed ..."

"But you told me he's always yelling and sulking!"

"Yeah, but - I don't know... maybe he's on his period, or maybe it's because you're new... Anyway, I'm amazed he didn't kill you; he's broken bigger stuff for smaller blunders... Maybe you've got a hold on him -"

"Shut up! That bastard didn't kill me 'cause... 'cause I'm lucky," Harry rectified, forcing his feet to go on and his mind to go away from the thought that the dragon had indeed a red rose caged in a glass container and some blond boy's broomstick hanging from golden pegs.

"Well, we won't see his slimy face again and that's all that matters," reassured the teacup in a joyful tone of voice.

"Yeah! Can't wait to see Hagrid's face... he'll be happy to have yet another creature he could talk to," said Harry grinning.

"Yeah! I met your friend and I liked him a lot. He was really cool! I'll miss my family, but I wanna live in a place where I can go and speak my mind without fearing being flung against a wall..."

"Yeah, I know what you mean... Listen, may I ask you something? The candlestick told me that -"

Harry stopped right away, dipped his hand in his pocket, and grabbed the cup as a protective measure. He began to take it out cautiously, not ungluing his eyes from the bizarre being he was facing. "What? What did he say?" Ron's voice sounded clearer for he was now unwrapped. He also fell silent when he saw the creature, his thin mouth contracted in a crack-like line.

"What are you doing in our forest, human?" said a longhaired man whose torso was unclad and had a horse's body below the waist.

"Oh, shit. What the fuck have I done to deserve this?" Harry muttered.

"What did you say?" ejaculated the quadruped angrily.

"Nothing! ... er... what was your question?" said Harry warily.

"I am asking you, you dim-witted human, what are you doing in our forest?" repeated the hybrid being.

"Our forest? W-whose forest? You mean... Are there other horses-?"

"Are you making fun of me, you dirty little dolt?!" the man-stuck-in-a-horse advanced threateningly.

"No! No! It's j-just that I-I'd never seen something... someone like you... I-I'm sorry... But, but..." stuttered Harry, thinking he had had to explain a great deal lately and recalling that none of his explanations had taken him to a happy end.

"I would have to be naïve to think that a human being would know about The Ancient Race of Centaurs, and Their Wisdom and Superiority."

"Well, you're right; I'm fool and ignorant. I'm glad to have added that particular and important piece of information to my extensive lack of knowledge," said Harry sheepishly, wishing the centaur would agree with him and just leave him alone.

"You speak the truth, human. You humans are nothing but an unnecessarily profuse show of ignorance. And you are all banned to enter this Sacred Forest," the centaur stated.

"I already told you I'm kind of stupid. There's no way I could have known that. I'm sorry for having intruded your territory. I'll leave as soon as I can, the only problem is that can't help going through the woods if I want to do that, so..."

"That being that the case, and due to the fact that I'm right now patrolling our lands in search for intruders, I'll commiserate with you. I'll escort you though the forest, but you'll have to follow me. A centaur would never descend to the point of allowing an inferior creature to sit upon him."

The centaur turned tail and started to lead the boy along a path that would certainly take him and his cup friend to the village sooner. Harry released the breath he had been holding, and smiled, thinking his horrendous luck had started to change.

It had started to change, but for worse.

A few blissful minutes had passed when, from the sky, a fairly obscene vocabulary, brother to a familiarly ominous voice, sprayed over the treetops.

"I'LL FIND YOU, YOU LOATHSOME PRAT!! ... YOU'LL REGRET HAVING ESCAPED FROM MY MANOR, YOU FUCKING CUNT!! ... WAIT TILL I FIND YOU, I'LL HAVE YOU COOKED ALIVE!! I'LL FRY YOUR LEGS WHILE I BOIL YOUR HEAD AND I GRILL YOUR BLOODY ASS!!! THEN, I'LL SKIN AND GUT YOU, AND NEXT I'LL EAT YOU ALIVE, AND I'LL STAB YOUR FUCKING BRAINS WITH A TEASPOON TO DEVOUR THEM RAW!! ... "

"What is that?!" asked the centaur, alarmed.

"Fuck! I told you he'd find us!!" said Harry hysterically to the cup.

"Looks like he's hungry... Don't worry. He hasn't found us. He's just scaring the birds, can't see us from above -" Ron tried to calm the boy down.

"YOU FIENDISH CREATURE!! BEGONE FROM OUR SKIES!! YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO COME AND PESTER OUR HEAVENLY GROUNDS!! RETREAT TO THE DEPTHS YOU BELONG TO, YOU DIABOLICAL GARGOYLE!!"

"NO! Don't yell at him! He's going to come down!" cried Harry pleadingly.

"Shit, now we're fucked," exclaimed the teacup.

"NO OBNOXIOUS BEAST WILL INVADE OUR FIRMAMENT OR LAND; WE HAVE TO PROTECT WHAT IS OURS BY RIGHT!!"

"WHO'S DOWN THERE??!!! WHOOO'S DOWN THERE???!!! WHO WANTS TO SHOW UP IN HELL ALL BROKEN AND BRUISED??!!" the dragon yelled while diving into the forest.

The centaur blew a horn that made Harry painfully recall the angels of the book of Revelations announcing the end of times. The minute the dragon irrupted in that nefarious scene, a deafening noise of hooves came closer, thundering like drums heralding a vicious battle.

"WHAT'S YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM, YOU HORNBLOWER ASS??!!" berated the dragon through a smirk, advancing menacingly towards the centaur who had yelled at him. "WHAT? DO YOU WANT ME TO TAME YOU, YOU BEARDED BITCH?? OOOOH! I SEE YOU'VE CALLED YOUR MARES!! NOT BRAVE ENOUGH TO FACE ME ALO -?!!"

The centaur stomped backwards and the dragon saw Harry was behind him. Both beast and boy froze on the spot.

"NO BEING, DISREGARDING NUMBER OF LEGS OR ANCESTRY, MAY DARE TO INSULT THE SUPREME LINEAGE OF THE CENTAURS WITHOUT HAVING TO ENDURE THE MOST ATROCIOUS OF THE CHASTISEMENTS!! PREPARE TO DIE, YOU ABOMINABLE DEMON!!"

An immeasurable amount of arrows rained over the dragon. All of them bounced off his hard bright scales. He didn't even flinch but spoke to Harry.

"You shouldn't have left. I went to apologize. I shouldn't have gone. You are an ungrateful bastard that deserves nothing but a good kicking!"

"You damn son of a bitch! You tried to kill me! Am I supposed to live with a murderer?! With a prick that death-threatens me every time things don't come out the way he wants it?!" snapped Harry, sweat escaping his body like rats leaving a doomed vessel.

"YOU'LL SUFFER THE TORTURE THAT AWAITS ALL THOSE WHO INSIST IN CONFRONTING A RACE THAT IS PROTECTED BY THE GODS AD ETERNUM!"

A new stock of arrows clashed against the dragon's metallic skin. Some centaurs even threw small axes to his most delicate body parts.

"But I told you not to go to the dungeons!"

"I know, but that's not a reason to scorch someone!"

"DIE, YOU HELLISH BEAST -!"

"SHUT UP, YOU FUCKING MONGREL!!!!!!! SHUT - THE FUCK - UP!!!!!!" screamed the dragon, just before emitting a sudden burst of flames that propelled in a fan-like course, making all the centaurs around disperse in a rush. "AND YOU, BLOODY TRAITOR, ARE GOING TO COME BACK WITH ME RIGHT NOW! YOU LEFT ME FOR A PACK OF BITCHES!" shouted the dragon fiercely, glaring at Harry.

"No way! I'm going back home!" Harry answered defensively.

The centaurs gathered around the dragon again and prepared to discharge a fresh supply of ammunition.

"YOUR HOME IS MY MANOR!!! YOU HAVE NO OTHER HOME!!!"

"Yes, I do!!!" shouted Harry, intimately feeling that Hagrid's cabin was something from a dream-like past.

"NO, YOU DON'T!!! YOU PROM -"

An axe hit the dragon in an eye. That was the beginning of "Wreckage And Ruin." That is, WAR.

Exclaiming swear words Harry didn't even know existed, the dragon rose violently, trembling as though possessed by a spirit as malignant as himself. He soared a few feet over the ground, exhaling a powerful and earsplitting roar along with a fiery jet of flames, taking care in charring every moving creature his sinister emanation could reach. The centaurs scattered again, some untouched, some on fire. The beast took his time to chase the mutants away, slashing with his claws every unfortunate creature he managed to grasp. The massacre didn't last long. Minutes later, the sound of running hooves had died.

The dragon returned from the battle place to find Harry sitting by a tree, head resting in his hands and eyes stuck to the ground. "Damn it! That fucking dog hit my eye with his fucking bone! I hope it was the one whose head I've just swallowed..." said the dragon rubbing his left eye, which was gray and had a black vertical slit just like his right one.

"Oh, yeah! Serves him right! Having his head removed will surely make him ponder about the foul and evil thing he did! Yours was probably the last eye he hit, and now he'll think twice before -" Harry started but didn't finish.

"SHUT UP! SHUT UP AND SIT ON MY BACK!! I'm starving, I wanna go home-!!!"

"I told you! I'm not going back -!"

"YES, YOU ARE! YOU PROMISED!"

"NO, I DIDN'T!"

"Listen, I'm sorry. It won't happen again. I'll give you some time before trying to kill you next time so you can go and hide, but NOT ESCAPE, all right? I promise I'll go break something else instead if you keep your word, ok?"

Inside Harry's right pocket, Ron started to shiver. He stuffed both hands inside in a concealed attempt to comfort him, and sensed a spherical object in the bottom of his left one. He withdrew it. It was the wingless Snitch. He started to fidget with it, trying to play for time.

"I-I don't believe you -" the boy began.

"You stole my snitch?? YOU STOLE MY SNITCH??"

"I didn't steal it! I just picked it up and -!! Well - I forgot! When I left -!" Harry tried to explain.

"You wanted to take a souvenir from my manor, didn't you?" leered the dragon.

"No way! If I'd wanted to do that, I would have taken the broomstick instead, and now I'd be far away and safe!" snapped Harry.

"Yeah, I know my stick and balls are irresistible, but I think you should learn to control your lewd impulses," the dragon said smirking.

"Shut up, you green-minded tw-!

"GET ON MY BACK... NOOOOW!!!" The dragon finally lost his patience.

Harry thought that a pack of hurt, burned, and wrathful centaurs was probably a more dangerous alternative compared to going back with the dragon, if that was conceivable. He knew it was his fault that some of them had died, since the dragon wouldn't have attacked them if he hadn't been in their company in the first place. And more importantly, he knew he had no power whatsoever over the horse-halved men, but he was not so sure about that concerning the beast. It seemed his friend Ron was somehow right. He had no choice.

And so, resignedly, he mounted the dragon and tried to forget how close he had been from freedom, and from Hagrid.

"I hope lunch's ready, I'm so starved that I'd eat a horse," Harry heard the dragon say as they soared back to the manor.