Control

Chapter 4: Vanishing Hope

Three days had passed and I had hardly spoken to Harry with exception the occasional 'Good Morning', 'excuse me', and 'pass the marmalade'. My mum must have detected my drop in optimism (though you could hardly ever call me optimistic) and enthusiasm as she hadn't asked about it, apparently afraid of intervening with my life situations. After the heaviness of gloom had overwhelmed me one dark and wet day, I threw on my rain coat and boots and made my way to the creek.

My rain boots sloshed in the mud as I trugded through the mud in the woods. A couple of paces later, I found myself staring at the flat gray rock down near the surface of the lake where Harry and I had shared our first kiss. A dull pain stabbed me in the center of my chest and a tear rolled down my cheek, dissolving into the cold droplets of rainwater also occupied there. I pulled down the hood of my coat and threw back my head, letting the rain wash away my tears. I fell onto a rock right above the rippling water and cried loudly. But since there was no one around to hear me, I never made a sound.

But he must have heard me. He must have felt my uncertainty, detected my insecurity or sensed my sorrow. For when he walked up to me and his hand took mine, all that had dissapeared.

I sat up and became face to face with him, his eyes were pink, but the green still shone through.

He put a finger over my lips to silence my whimpering. His eyes glistened with tears.

"Never in my life would I want to make you cry," he said, his voice cracking a bit.

It was obvious, it was undenyable, it was true. So true. I loved him. I loved his dark hair. I loved his piercing eyes. I loved his arms and how they would hold me when I needed him. I loved it when he said my name. I loved his habit of ruffling his hair. I loved it when I felt his touch. I loved it when I felt his breath on my face. I loved his hopes. I loved his dreams. I loved his love for me. Most of all, I loved him.

"H-Harry..."

Say it...

"I..."

Come on...

"think I..."

You know it...

"I'm so in love with you, Harry..."

He stared into my eyes so deeply I could almost feel the penetration. I think this would be one of those moments that no matter how hard you try, you wont be able to erase them from your memory.

He took my hands and at that point, I felt like I could do and be anything.

And suddenly he laughed. It wasn't an amused laugh, it was if he were...happy. Truly and very happy. And my God, I felt the same way too, only I think I would have cried in joy if I hadn't laughed with him.

"And I'm so in love with you, Hermione..." he whispered suavely, his breath gently blowing against my skin, warmth to the coldness that had surrounded me for the past few days.

And then he enveloped me in his arms and kissed me so passionately, I felt more tears well up in my eyes. Thousands of unexplainable emotions seized me as I lingered in Harry's embrace, wanting so badly to make the moment last forever.

'Oh my God...' I thought as we broke from the kiss and leaned our foreheads together, 'This is what love feels like...'

And my heart leaped

~*~

Later that night...Harry's POV

"He's slipping trough our fingers, master...We need to attack him from his weakest point,"

"Yes, Bella, and that sparks an...idea..."

"Yes, Master?"

"Cunning as he may be, he possesses a quality that earned him a dead godfather..."

"A fool, he is, wanting to be there to save the world all by himself-"

"Silence,"

"Yes my apologies, master,"

"The boy has feelings, emotions what some would call passion...we must get to him through his heart... "

Harry Potter shot up in his bed, beads of cold sweat trickling down his pale face. His lightning bolt shaped scar on his head throbbed madly. He groaned and slapped his hand over his head in pain before catching on to his nightmare.

"Hermione!"

Throwing his comforter off him, he dashed out of his room and threw open Hermione's bedroom door. The bed was a mess, the pillows on the floor and the sheets hanging over the sides. The large window in the back of the room was wide open, its white curtains billowing madly in the wind like ghosts in the night sky floating aimlessly about.

"Hermione!" Harry yelled half calling and half demanding her to answer. But the only sound was his own rasping breath and the soft whistle of the crying wind.

A tear fell from the eye of a hero.

~*~

Everything was dark... I tried to regain conciousness but the pain had only worsened.

"Had enough, bitch?" said the hissing voice.

"Not nearly," I lied, I couldn't show weakness and vunerability. Not now. Not to her.

"You've got nerve little girl," she said, hate dripping from each word, "you'll be fun to toy with...Crucio!"

I writhed on the cold stone floor. What could I do? My wrists and ankles were bound with something strong I could not identify. My brain buzzed with pain, my mouth gasped for air and my conciousness slipped. But I held a firm grip to my will. I would not let them get to the one last part of me still alive.

And soon, the pain ceased, but I was still too weak to move a limb. I closed my eyes tightly, not letting tears flow.

"Get up Mudblood!" yelled Lestrange's harsh voice.

My first intention was to stubbornly lie there and disobey her orders, or come up with a smart comeback, but when the rational part of me kicked in, I decided to follow her orders and attempt to stand. I managed to get on my hands and knees. Well I must have done it too slowly for her liking. I whimpered in pain as a foot rammed into my ribs and I was thrown on the floor again. Panic struck me as dark red fluid began gushing out of my mouth as I coughed violently.

"Don't let your filthy blood fall onto these grounds!" she hissed angrily and then violently grabbed me by the shoulders and pulled me to my feet.

Thats where I was. Volemort's lair. Looking around, I studied the place I was in. It was dark and around me I saw leafless trees and cracked stone grounds under a thin layer of what seemed like blueish dust. A hazy mist hovered over the ground, making it seem like a classic scene of a Muggle horror film. There was no sign of life besides the occasional bitter breeze and sound of my own frightened breaths. Bellatrix Lestange, the cruel woman standing next to me was looking deep into the woods with an expectant look on her face. Then as if remembering I was here, she pointed her wand at me and a chair appeared behind me. As if someone invisible were pushing me, I was thrown back into the chair. Then chains, glowing with a bright golden auora encircled me just under my breast and bound my tightly to the chair. I gasped in pain as they were so tight, it was diffucult to breathe.

''So little girl," Lestrange said in her fake, high-pitched voice, "I assume your little Potter's girlfriend? How sweet..." she said kicking dirt on my shoes with her black boots. Anger rose in me.

"Well this one, like many others, will be a story of tragic love. I'll make sure of that," she said, an evil grin spreading glefully across her pale face.

"Let me tell you what we'll do to him. First, we'll hang you up and then slice you every which way until all the disgusting blood of yours had drained from your body..." she said slowly, walking over to me and digging her long nail into my arm, puncturing it. "He'll watch as you are taking your last breaths...he'll watch as you slowly and painfully," she said this last word and dragged her nail up my arm, causing a long, red gash, "cease to exist...and he could live for the next hour knowing he was so helpless..."

I yelped in pain and tried my hardest to refrain from calling her a profane name. But anger had gotten the best of me. I couldn't hold in my rage any longer.

"You evil hag!" I snapped, her face looked both suprised and angry, "How do you sleep at night knowing you've caused pain and suffering to innocent people for no logical reason? You took something from a boy who never had anything! I'm going to make sure the same gets back to you ten times worse!"

I thought of Sirius and how much he loved Harry. I thought of that playful black dog running freely after months of solitude. I thought of the look on the sallow face of a wrongly accused man as he stared into the eyes of his best friends murderer. I thought of Harry's pain, of his tears and of the life he would leave behind. And suddenly I felt a rage like no other feeling I had ever had in my life.

"Go to hell!" I yelled as my mind exploded with venomous anger.

The last sound that Bellatrix Lestange would ever make had just been made before a brach of a nearby tree snapped off and came flying into her abdomen. A suprised expression, like that of Sirius's before he died, flashed across her face. I gasped in disgust. Dark blood spattered my face as the dying woman sunk to her knees and slumped over, her eyes still wide and lifeless as they had always been. A sickly satisfied feeling ran through my veins. She had dropped her wand. But my hands were bound and of no use to me at the moment. So after trying to come up with ideas, I kicked off a shoe and using my foot, brought it to my hand. I then used a severing Charm on the chains and they snapped in half and fell off me with a series of loud mettalic sounds. I stood up and looked around for a sign of...anything. But seeing that nothing was around except for the lifeless trees and the corpse of Bellatrix Lestrange, I put my head in my hands and tried to contemplete what to do. Nothing came up. I was stranded. I would wait here for someone to find me and then I'd die. At least I had killed the person responsible for the death of an innocent man and most likely much more. That was about the only ironically bright side of this situation. I sighed and looked down at the lifeless form of the woman.

I don't know what had gotten into me but anger had taken total control of me. I spit on her and watched it roll down her pale face. Lady like.

"Who's helpless now?" I muttered bitterly, disdain in every word.

The a cold, raspy voice spoke in a hissing whisper that sent chills up my spine.

"You are..."

If it's physically possible for your heart to literally drop inside of you, mine just did.