Dark Future

If they at least hadn't been so stuck up and cliquey... nah. I still wouldn't have liked them.

Disregard for rules... well, I had that too, but they were so... them. And it was 'Them', mind you, not just them. If you get my meaning.

They were all good-looking, too, at least that's what the girls said. Even the scrawny one, he was "impossibly cute and adorable," I head a few of the girls crooning. If they only knew what the git was really like.

They were basically everything I wasn't. They had everything I didn't. They got everything I deserved. They took everything I had.

I was smart. Not to be... well, yeah, to be vain. I was one of the brightest students in a long time.

One of them. But not 'the' brightest. Not even the best in my year. Every year, in every subject, one of them, Them, would always score higher, save in Potions. Potter, James; Black, Sirius; and Lupin, Remus and their little side-kick Pettigrew, Peter. The Dream Team.

They hated me. I don't really recall why. I suppose it was natural. I was Slytherin, and they Gryffindor. I wasn't too much of a prat. To a degree. Ok, so it's natural for a young Slytherin to be a prat. I couldn't help it.

They played tricks on me. I was always the butt of their jokes. Did I ever try to get them back? No, not then. I was too meek. But I planned to. I planned my revenge, bidding my time, and waiting for the sweetest opportunity to present itself.

It never did present itself. At least, not while I was in school. Around third year, I began to forsake thoughts of nailing the Dream Team, the precious Marauders, and sought new goals. Lily Evans.

Lily Evans was a kind, sweet Gryffindor red-head with bright green eyes and stellar grades. I fell in love with Lily Evans.

~~~

"Lily!" he cried, catching up to her in the hall.

She smiled. It was Severus again. For a while now, he'd been flirting with her, paying her extra special attention. He fell into step with her, presently, shaking his adorable hair out of his face and pushing his glasses up on his nose. He was wearing Muggle clothing under his robes, baggy jeans and a green shirt, which his Slytherin tie was slung over. A tiny hoop was in one ear.

"Severus," she greeted with a smile.

"Would you do me the honour of having dinner with me?" he said suavely, with an arched eyebrow.

Lily giggled. She frowned inwardly. 'Lily,' she scolded, 'you don't giggle. You don't act like this!'. "We eat supper together every night, though. Great Hall, remember?"

Severus got a glint in his eye. "Yes, fair Lily, but this will be the first dinner we'll have eaten," here he winked, "together."

Lily smiled conspiratorially. "Tell me more."

~~~

After Lily and I started dating, Black, one of Them, started to hate me more. Lily was stressed out, coming back from the Gryffindor common room with tales of yelling matches with Black.

I did my best to protect Lily from Black, but he was everywhere. I couldn't figure it out until I heard him and Lupin, the most amicable of the group, talking.

~~~

"Jamie's liked her forever, and everyone knows it, too. Even slimy Slytherins," hissed Sirius' voice.

"True, but Snape won her fair and square. Just 'cause James' was too slow doesn't give us merit to make her miserable. And plus, you're fighting James' battle. If he wants her, he should go out and get her," Remus reasoned.

Severus was crouched behind the corner, about to turn it, but leaping out of sight once he heard his name.

Sirius sighed, thoroughly frustrated. "Come on, Re, we're going to be late for class."

~~~

So James Potter liked Lily. I couldn't really blame him. But I blamed Black. What business did he have to make her miserable, trying to get her together with James who wasn't even man enough to take her himself. I agreed with Lupin, and even almost began to like the prick.

Lily and I dated until sixth year before the Dream Team; Them; finally did something to stop us. Surprisingly, it was Lupin. I always tolerated Remus, and as I said, even began to like the slimy git. I'd always had a 'personality conflict' with Black, and of course didn't like the fact that James was interested in my girlfriend, but I never thought Remus would sink so low.

Being a Slytherin, I'd always had somewhat of a fascination with the Dark Arts. In a box in the back of my trunk there was, locked up, all my Dark Arts artifacts, spell books, and other illegal paraphernalia. I suppose I only had them because I'd no idea what Dark Arts truly were, and what sorts of evil could come of them. That, and the fact that they black market trade among the Slytherins was probably the most well-run in the whole of wizarding England.

Of course, Lily knew none of this. She wouldn't have understood, being Gryffindor, and would have thought I was going to be the next You-Know-Who (if we'd known about him back then).

But of course Lupin and Black knew. I don't know how, but those prats had eyes all over the school. Anything Black said, Lily shrugged off. She never took him seriously. But Lupin she trusted. The guy was always truthful, or so he had the appearance of. I know better now.

So when Lupin began telling Lily I was hiding something from her, she started to doubt me. Because I was so shifty and sketchy about the whole subject, her suspicions were confirmed, and her trust broken. Our relationship was very strained, and finally, gods know why, we broke up.

I will say this unmistakably clear. Letting Lily Evans go was the worst mistake of my entire life. And I made some horrible mistakes.

After Lily, my life was a wreck. I didn't care. I showered only when I felt like it, finding it oddly satisfying when my personal hygiene, or lack thereof, repulsed someone. I repulsed me. And I loved it.

I got into everything. Everything, you name it, I tried it. Dark Arts, Drugs, Alchohol. Less of the latter, and more of the former. Working with the Dark Arts lent me momentary power. I was utterly intrigued with it. And I could now get my revenge.

Lily, who knew me better than anyone, or thought she did, became frightened of me. She and Potter would hold hands about eh school while I would shuffle past, either keeping quiet, staring evilly at her, or say something rude to her. Both of them always turned red, and it pleased me. I forgot all about the part about me keeping the Dark Arts stuff from her. In my mind, she simply left me for Potter out of cruelty. And yet I could not quite hate her.

Black grew increasingly mad at me as seventh year progressed. Hadn't he done enough damage to my life? I hate him back, with every fiber of my being, but I never tried anything, not at school. I still waited, still bidding my time, now waiting for that sweet opportunity anew.

I hated Lupin, too. Hated all the Slytherin girls who swooned over him, or any of the Dream Team. It went without saying that I utterly despised Potter.

And Pettigrew. The other three let him tag along, including him, befriending him, but I saw him for what he really was. A slimy weasel, small and miserable, who wouldn't stand up for anybody, and would do anything to save his own skin. A pathetic kid looking for the biggest bully in the playground to protect him.

My kind of a guy.

I used the slimy rat to gather information for me. I gathered all the blackmail I could on Lupin. I was almost sure he was a werewolf. I only had to make sure.

~~~

"Woosie boy off to Gramma's again?" asked the dark boy, for dark was the only way to describe him. His shoulder length hair glistened with grease and sweat, his steely eyes cold. The hoop in his ear had been replaced with a menacing, skull-tipped spike, and an eyebrow piercing had joined it. Dark robes, and fully black wizarding garb together with his sour smirk made him seem extremely evil and bitter.

James, Lily, and Sirius, of whom he was inquiring this, sat at a table in the library. "Remus has gone to visit his mother, who was taken ill," said Lily.

"I wasn't addressing you, slut. I was talking to this git," he said, motioning at Sirius.

The petite redhead blushed, and looked away.

"Don't talk to Lily like that," defended Sirius, his voice tight.

Snape raised his eyebrows at Lily. "Oh, your boyfriend's not man enough to stick up for you? He has to get his best friend to do it. He's not man enough for much, eh?" asked the greasy boy, aware of James' furious gaze and Lily's embarrassment.

"Shut up," said Sirius coldly. He glanced at the other two. James gave an affirming nod. "If you really want to know about Remus, come with me. I've got something to show you." Sirius rose from the table, and led the way out of the library, through the halls, and onto the grounds, telling Snape all about the passage under the Willow.

~~~

I honestly don't know why I did what Black said. I don't really remember anything exactly, and I think I was quite high. But along this huge tunnel, it hit me that if I was right, I would probably meet my death at the end of this tunnel. And I really didn't care at all. I didn't exactly want to commit suicide, but before it became too much of a decision, there was Potter, come to save the day. Prat.

He hauled me back out of the tunnel, probably on command of Lily, but before he did, I caught a glimpse of Lupin. Remus Lupin was most definately a werewolf.

Dumbledore made me keep quiet. He explained everything. He knew! All this time, he knew, and he still let that filth in this school! James knew, and Peter and Sirius. And Lily, too.

I focused on my grades from then on. Despite my 'minor' drug addictions, my grades were sky high. I passed DADA with exceptional skill, mostly because all my free time was spent dabbling in the Dark Arts.

At graduation, everyone has something of an idea of what they want to be, a dream they want to pursue.

We'd all heard of a power rising. The leader of this Dark Rising was called Lord Voldemort, and name that was becoming feared everywhere.

And so what I wanted to do with my life, come graduation, was to seek out this Voldemort, and join him.

I found and joined Voldemort, becoming a Death Eater of the Dark Rising. He branded my arm with what he termed the Dark Mark, and set me loose to cause destruction, feed addiction, and terrorize everyone I could.

And I disgusted myself. I was living the life, having access to everything I needed, and still it wasn't enough. They, curse Them, had taken all I really wanted. My Lily, and with her, all my chances at a normal life.

I approached Dumbledore with a double-agent plot. I told him everything--well, mostly everything. I left out the bit about the black marketing in Slytherin and the drugs in the school. He and I arranged communication, so that Dumbledore and his Order of the Pheonix (to whom I was merely known as an 'inside contact') would know what the Dark Rising, or Circle of Death Eaters was doing.

Had I known then that Black, Lupin, and Potter were a part of that Order, I might have reconsidered.

I delivered valuable information to the Order. I lived on the edge, and it was the best living I had. I didn't need the drugs as much, and I never really wanted much of the other stuff after witnessing Dark Arts for the revolting thing they truly were.

Then I came upon a dilemma. Should I, or should I not, let the Potter family die?

~~~

The greasy man let his robes fall, and he stepped into the shower. He cursed aloud.

"I'm outta beer," he complained to himself when he was done his shower.

He needed to be drunk right now.

Not for the first time, his mind wandered to the red-haired woman who, strangely enough, he still loved.

He really needed to be drunk right now.

But there was no way to get his hands on alcohol. He had long since abandoned the use of drugs, and the Dark Arts no longer appealed to him. He sat on his couch, his mind completely sober for once, and he cleared his thoughts of all but the choice before him.

Lord Voldemort's next target was the Potters, and little wonder. James refused to succumb to the fear, helped Dumbledore in blatantly defying the Dark Lord, and refused to back away from his morals and join the Rising.

How disgustingly like Voldemort he, Severus Snape, was. Voldemort wanted to take down Potter. Wanted him gone, dead. Even though Snape knew it was wrong to kill three innocent people, he wasn't going to give them warning. He wasn't going to tell Potter to get himself, his wife, and his son into hiding.

How disgustingly like Voldemort he was.

He could not stop hating Potter, would not let himself not hate Potter. When he had asked Lily on a date, he hated him. When he married Lily, he hated him. When Lily was pregnant with their brat of a child, Severus hated Potter. Potter deserved to die, and his boy with him.

As Snape sat there, wrestling with himself, he came to a conclusion. He could not let Lily die, especially at the cruel hands of Lord Voldemort. He would not let that happen. So with a sigh, Snape put on his cloak, and set out for Hogwarts to warn Dumbledore.

~~~