Let's Make Our Escape

Let's Make Our Escape

Harry wasn't certain how he should feel at that moment as he stood up on the hill that overlooked Hogsmead. He could not share in the celebrations taking place throughout the wizard community. Harry felt anger and bitterness toward the celebrants. So many of them were the people who had remained neutral or simply stood on the sidelines to let others fight Lord Voldemort. They had not lost anyone they loved or experienced the pain and suffering Harry had become accustomed to; yet they still feared the name of Voldemort even now that he was gone.

Hagrid had been willing to fight. Now he was dead while people like Cornelius Fudge stilled lived and prospered. Harry felt a surge of rage as he thought of Fudge. It was people like Fudge who had allowed Voldemort to come into power and people like Dumbledore who had tried to stop him. Now Dumbledore was dead and Fudge was enjoying the comfortable life that Hagrid's and Dumbledore's efforts had given him.

Harry glared angrily at the piece of parchment that announced his awarding of the Order of Merlin First class. "Suddenly want to honor a parselmouth who tells crackpot stories, do you Fudge? You want to know where you can stick your Order on Merlin?" Harry threw down the piece of parchment and spat on it. He closed his eyes and imagined another world. A world where Voldemort had never come to power because the people in that world who lead the wizard community were not ignorant politicians. It was a world where his parents were still alive, a world where Sirius had never spent twelve years in Azkaban, a world where Remus and Hagrid had never suffered through bigotry because of things beyond their control, a world where the Weasleys got the respect they deserved, a world where muggle born wizards and witches like Hermione were never attacked because they were muggle born, a fair world.

When dreaming I'm guided through another world

Time and time again.

"Are you alright, Harry?" Harry opened his eyes to see Remus, his first real mentor, standing beside him.

"I'm fine. I was just thinking," Harry answered with a shrug.

"Ron, Hermione, and Ginny are really worried about you."

"I just needed some time by myself, honestly," said Harry. "I knew they'd insist on not letting me go off alone so I snuck out."

"That's perfectly reasonable," Remus answered with a smile. Harry saw some pain in his eyes.

"You really miss Hagrid too, don't you?" Harry asked. Remus nodded soberly.

"You know, he once told me that I reminded him of him when he came to Hogwarts; how I wasn't sure I belonged there." Harry felt a grin spread across his face. It was his first smile in a long time.

"He said the same thing to me once."

"Really?"

"Yeah, just after Rita Skeeter wrote that article..." Harry's throat suddenly became too tight to speak.

"What's wrong, Harry?" asked Remus. Harry bit his lip then took a deep breath.

"It's not fair. The way people treated him because he was half giant. It isn't fair that people still treat you like you're some monster even after everything you've done in the war." Remus looked at Harry carefully as though trying to think of something to say. Harry spoke first.

"You want to know what I was thinking about just before you came?"

"What?" asked Remus.

"I was thinking about what the world could be if it weren't run by a bunch of ignorant, self-righteous fools who just allow Voldemort to take over and let other people do the fighting. My parents would be alive, Sirius would never have gone to Azkaban, the Weasleys would have a better life, and you and Hagrid would never suffer from bigotry." Remus gave Harry a small smile.

"That's quite some world," he mused.

At Sunrise I fight to stay asleep

'Cause I don't wanna leave the comfort of this place.

"Yes, that is quite some world," said Ginny as she walked up behind the two men.

"I think I'll go tell Sirius that you're alright," said Remus. Harry looked at him quickly. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone where you are."

"Thanks," said Harry. Remus smiled lightly. He started for the castle and stopped suddenly after a few steps.

"You know, Harry," he said. "I never told you about you father's Patronous, did I?" Harry shook his head. The thought of his father conjuring a Patronous had never even occurred to him.

"Okay," said Harry. "What form did my father's Patronous take?" Remus grinned.

"It was you riding a broom in your quidditch robes. You were only a baby and somehow James knew what you'd be doing later on in life. It was quite a powerful Patronous, much like your Patronous of him in his stag form." With that said, Remus continued toward the castle. Harry and Ginny stood there dumbstruck.

'Cause there's a hunger, a longing to escape

From the life I live when I'm awake.

"You must have made your father really happy," said Ginny.

"I'm sure he would have made me happy, my mum too," said Harry.

"I want to make you happy, Harry."

"I know you do, Ginny," said Harry looking directly into her eyes. "Believe me, I want to be with you. It's just...well...shit! We've tried this so many times before, Ginny. I'm carrying around too many memories. What I've experienced will probably affect me for the rest of my life and you shouldn't have to deal with that anymore, Ginny. You deserve better."

"Has it ever occurred to you that maybe I want to deal with that, Harry?"

"Why would you want to deal with it?"

"Because I LOVE YOU!" Ginny shrieked. She suddenly went scarlet. Harry had known that Ginny was in love with him since his first visit to the burrow but she had never said the words out loud, even after they had started dating. Harry's jaw dropped. The two of them stood in shock for a few moments then Harry shook his head in disbelief.

"How can you love me after everything I've done to you?" he asked.

"What do you think you've done to me?" asked Ginny with her brow furrowed.

"Oh gee, could harping after Cho Chang while ignoring you be one of them?"

"That was before we ever got together, Harry, why would you think that even matters?"

"Because I knew that you liked me and I just brushed you aside like you were some insect."

"Why are you trying to push me away again?"

"Ginny, Voldemort was able to come back to power because he took my blood. I have a connection with the most evil wizard who ever lived. Is that really something you want to deal with every day for the rest of your life?"

"Are you forgetting that I was possessed by him for several months. The Chamber of Secrets would never have been re-opened if I hadn't been so foolish."

"Ginny, that wasn't your fault. Lucius Malfoy is the one who planted that diary on you."

"And Wormtail is the one who bled you. Voldemort coming back wasn't your fault." Ginny suddenly threw her arms around Harry's neck. "Please stop pushing me away. I need you. I want to go to your dream world with you." Harry found himself hugging Ginny back.

So let's go there

Let's make our escape

C'mon let's go there

Let's ask can we stay.

"I'm so sorry, Ginny," Harry sobbed into her shoulder.

"For what?" asked Ginny with her face against his neck.

"For being an idiot. I've been feeling sorry for myself, thinking that I was the only one who knew what it's like to have that kind of connection to Voldemort. I saw you in the Chamber. I saw him with that triumphant look on his face, proud of what he had done to you. After all that it still never occurred to me that you might understand what I've been going through."

"It's alright, Harry. He's gone forever now. We're free from him."

"Are we?"

"Maybe not yet, but we will be. If you'll just let me, we can help each other."

Can you take me higher?

To a place where blind men see

Can you take me higher?

To a place with golden streets.

"I want to help you, Ginny," said Harry as he pulled back a little to look her in the eyes again. "I want to tear him out of you. I wish I could change the past so he'd never been in you."

"I don't," said Ginny firmly.

"What?"

"I'm glad it happened to me. That whole thing with Riddle's diary helped me understand you better. It wasn't the greatest experience of my life, but I'm glad for it."

Although I would like our world to change

It helps me to appreciate

Those nights and those dreams.

"How can you be glad for that?" asked Harry.

"I told you I love you!" said Ginny in a more assertive manner this time. "That experience brought me closer to you in a way nothing else could have. You didn't tell Ron what had happened because you knew how horrible I was feeling. I knew I could trust you at that moment. I knew you were so much more that some hero I'd been hearing about my entire life. You were a tangible person that I loved not just someone I stood in awe of."

But my friend I'd sacrifice all those nights

If I could make the earth and my dreams the same.

"Ginny, I don't know what to say. I've never thought of it that way."

"That's because you've been living your entire life thinking that you don't deserve to be loved," said Ginny.

"That's not true," said Harry. His voice wavered a bit on the last word.

"Oh really? Well let's think about this one for just a minute. Your loving parents were killed when you were a baby and you were sent to live with your horrible aunt and uncle. You blamed yourself when you found out your mother had sacrificed herself for you. You blamed yourself for Sirius putting himself in danger to look after you. You blamed yourself for Cedric Diggory's death, shall I continue?" asked Ginny with her eyebrows raised. Harry sighed.

"Maybe those things weren't entirely my fault, but I did have a lot to do with them. My mother might still be alive if she had just let Voldemort kill me."

"Do you think she'd be happy, Harry? That's what people are willing to do when they love someone. I've been beating myself up over and over again because you almost got yourself killed to save me when Riddle had me trapped."

"Ron and I couldn't let you die."

"Exactly, Harry. That's what people do for the ones they love. You deserve to live as much as anyone else does. Please stop hating yourself. Stop hating."

The only difference is

To let love replace all our hate.

Harry took another deep breath. "I hate so many people Ginny. All those people who just stood back and let the rest of us fight; they're down there celebrating what other people fought for. They let all this happen, they didn't lose any body they care about, and now they're benefiting from the good other people have done."

"I know," said Ginny. "But are you going to let that destroy you?"

"Alright Ginny, I need your help. I need you. I...love you." Ginny took both of Harry's hands into hers and looked him right in the eyes.

"Tell me you love me like you mean it," she demanded with a smile.

"I love you, Ginny Weasley. Would you like to be Ginny Potter?" Harry's eyes widened in surprise at the last sentence he uttered. Ginny grinned more broadly than she had grinned in her entire life. She leaped up and wrapped her legs around Harry's waist. Harry, who was caught completely off guard, over balanced and fell to the ground.

"Ohh!" shrieked Ginny and she started to blush and ran her hand over the back of Harry's head. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," Harry answered. "In fact, I'm better than I've been in a long time. I'm wonderful."

Ginny sat on Harry's waist with one handed rooted to the ground on either side of his face. The two of them just gazed adoringly at each other, frozen in a trance. I wonder if this is how my father felt when he looked at my mother. Harry thought. Then he remembered what Remus had told him about his father's Patronous. James had wanted him to be happy. He wanted to make his father's dreams for him come true. After the sacrifice his parents had made for him, the least he could do was live a good life.

Harry's thoughts were suddenly interrupted when Ginny pressed her lips rather fervently to his. As though it were an involuntary reflex, Harry pressed his lips back to hers, wrapped his arms securely around her, and pulled her as close to himself as he could.

Up high I feel like I'm alive for the very first time

Up high I'm strong enough to take these dreams

And make them mine.