Night Swimming

Night swimming deserves a quiet night

Harry, my Harry, do you remember the start of it?

That night, you were on the floor in the hallway sobbing silently, and that was where I found you. I took you in my arms and at my touch you did not hesitate, you just clung to my neck as I carried you through the halls and outside. When I laid you down under a tree you did not question me. You did not say a word when I produced a bottle of firewhisky. You took the bottle when I offered it to you and took a swig, shuddered slightly, and passed it back.

You smiled at me from behind your untidy fringe that had fallen in front of your eyes; it almost covered your glasses. After about an hour or so you had passed out, and I laughed at your low alcohol tolerance.

"Christ Potter you can't even hold your booze," I remember mumbling to no one in particular.

I sent you to the hospital wing without the disturbance of Madame Pomfrey. I can imagine you woke up with a killer headache, wondering what on earth you did last night and how on earth you got grass stains on your pyjamas. I saw you in Potions the next day, your eyes were blood shot and you looked rather unsteady on your feet. But, surprisingly you seemed better, you established mild chatter with your friends for the first time in weeks.

The photograph on the dashboard, taken years ago,

Turn around backwards so the windshield shows,

Every street light reveals a picture in the verse.

Still it's so much clearer...

I forgot my shirt at the waters edge,

The moon is low tonight.

The next night I went for another walk around the school. First roaming the corridors then making my way outside. I didn't know why exactly, but I felt that I should see if you needed me again. To stop your tears, to see your smile, to get you drunk... just to be near you. I walked along the edge of the lake, kicking along pebbles with my slippered feet. As I approached the tree, I saw something in the shadows, I looked harder and it had disappeared. I stopped at the water's edge for a moment and looked up at the moon. The sky was the clearest I had ever seen, the moon was full, and shone pale light onto the castle.

You stealthily crept up behind me and crash tackled me into the water.

"Fuck...who was that?" I gasped, asking the air in general. I looked around, searching for my attacker.

With a shimmer of light, and a flash of silvery material, you appeared, your invisibility cloak fell to the ground. You had a lopsided, nervous grin on your face.

"Oh, so I found you..." I began.

"You were looking for me?"

"Ah, perhaps...I couldn't sleep, and... and I wanted to see if you were alright or not too, I suppose."

"Why would you want to know if I was okay anyway?" you asked.

"Well, last night you were in quite a state you realise that?" I told you.

"Oh, that," your voice lowered, "yeah, well you know, what happened with at the Department of Mysteries... with Sirius... and Voldemort, and that whole prophecy...and my parents, and..."

"I can imagine you're a bit confused."

"Yeah, I am."

You sat down in the water beside me.

"Potter?"

"Stop, just don't please."

And you kissed me. It was such a sweet, soft, gentle kiss. You tasted like firewhisky.

"Potter..." I said, pulling away slightly, so that our noses were only a few centimetres apart. "This is a rather awkward situation you've put me in," you went to move away," but... but, I just wanted to know... where did you get the booze from? It could be useful at a time like this."

You smiled, and it was the first real smile I had seen from you in over a year.

You unbuttoned my pyjama top and chucked it away over your shoulder. You planted kisses all over my chest and picked a path up the side of my neck and over my nose and on the corners of my mouth. Then your hands started to make their way down over my breast plate and, pushing me back in the water, you crawled on top of me, and snaked your hands past my waistband and under my boxers.

"Potter, what have you got on your mind by doing this?" I asked.

"Call me Harry, please, why, does it bother you?"

"Oh, oh... no, n-n-not at all," my voice wavered.

After I had returned the favour to you, both of us, rather out of breath, sopping wet, slowly, with lots of unplanned stops on the way, made our way back to the castle.

We parted at the entrance hall, with one final kiss.

"You smell like pondweed Severus."

"I do not, that's your smell, rubbing off on me."

"I think its time for you to go Professor."

And I kissed you one last time and walked up the stairs.

Night swimming deserves a quiet night.

I'm not quite sure all these people understand,

It's not like years ago, fear of getting caught.

Recklessness of water... they cannot see me naked,

These things they go away, replaced by everyday.

Night swimming remembering that night.

And now, with five years past, you are lying far too early in your grave. Voldemort had finally been defeated, but you were dead the day before the news spread. Your body was found at the bottom of the lake, grey and lifeless.

You, I thought I knew you,

You, I cannot judge,

You, I thought you knew me.

This one laughing quietly underneath my breath.

Night swimming.

You swam out into the middle of the lake and waited, for almost all night the Healers found. I can imagine you, floating in the winter's icy water, staring at the moon. Our photo in your hand, crumpled, muggle ink running.

The photograph reflects every streetlight a reminder.

I wasn't dead. Even though Voldemort near killed me on discovering of my betrayal, I was not dead.

Cannot describe night swimming.

I remember what we had, what we shared. It's still alive Harry, it still shines strong.

Night swimming deserves a quiet night.

Deserves a quiet night.