Changes and Consequences

The Dursleys, owners of Number Four Privet Drive, prided themselves on being absolutely normal. There was nothing odd in their house; every inch was perfectly clean, every item was in its proper place, and not a speck of dust could be seen. This was the rule, except in the smallest bedroom of the house, where a small teenage boy with black hair sat at his desk reading.

Early that morning, Harry Potter had woken to get ready for his early morning run when he had found two letters and a couple books on his desk. The first note was from Mad-eye Moody, which stated that he should not leave the Dursley's yard to go on his usual morning run, nor should he leave the house at all except for an emergency. There were no reasons and no more to the letter than that. To say that Harry was angry with the letter would have been a vast understatement. That letter was the last straw; he was already angry with the Order for all their lies and betrayals last year, and now it seemed they were going to do it again. His anger continued to grow throughout the morning, until his loyal owl Hedwig reminded him that he had not read the second letter. He was surprised when he opened up the letter; it was written on normal parchment but the color of the ink changed from pink, to green, to yellow, to purple, and then finally a bright orange that would do the Weasleys proud. He actually laughed when he saw the signature. The letter was from Tonks. It explained that they were investigating a possible threat in his area and that he'd only need to stay inside until they made sure it was safe. She ended the letter saying that, though he may laugh at them, to read the books because they could help him with his emotions and help with sleep since he wouldn't be able to run to exhaustion outside any more.

Harry actually managed a small smile after reading the letter from Tonks. He had only learned that Tonks was watching him for the Order a few days ago. It had been almost a week and a half since he had gotten back from Hogwarts and he had barely slept at all. The few times he managed to sleep, the nightmares made it worse than staying awake. He nearly passed out from exhaustion at the park and stumbled onto her, causing them both to fall. It took him a moment to figure out what had happened and it wasn't until he grabbed to pull the invisibility cloak off that he realized just where exactly his hand was on her and what he had grabbed on the beautiful Metamorphmagus. His anger at being followed quickly dissipated and turned into complete embarrassment as he stuttered an apology. She laughed softly and told him not to worry. She helped him back to his room where she took off the invisibility cloak so that she could talk to him. His embarrassment was still there when they began talking, but had completely disappeared by the end of their conversation. Tonks had been the first person he actually talked to since he had gotten back and he hadn't realized how much he missed not being alone. Because of her, he now understood that it wasn't completely his fault that Sirius died. It was amazing really how much she had helped in just an afternoon of talking; she didn't try to tell him it wasn't his fault or anything like that.

She just asked a simple question - if a similar situation happened again, would he make the same decision and would he be willing to take the risk of the vision being true? She said to consider it with only what he knew at the time. It took a while to really think about it and explain it all to her, but he finally realized that he would do the exact same thing over again. Apparently Tonks hadn't known all of what had happened because she had gasped several times when he explained everything and had thrown herself at him with a hug whenever he mentioned the Cruciatus or Voldemort. Afterwards she explained that it was one of the few weapons the Dark had over the Light, and that he had made the only choice he could and still remain true to himself. Tonks left that evening but had giving him a couple potions to help him sleep for the night and told him that running during the morning and evening - and if needed, through out the day - would make it easier to sleep in the beginning.

Three days had passed and the Order still hadn't let him know when he'd be able to go outside again. The potions Tonks gave him had worked well but since then, he still hadn't been able to get a night of uninterrupted sleep. The nightmares were less but between them and his sore muscles, Harry woke in a worse mood than he went to bed in and didn't want to move. Unfortunately, the owl at his window had other ideas for him. Tonks had helped with learning that it wasn't his fault Sirius died, but that didn't mean that his death still wasn't painful, and it didn't help much with the prophecy. He tried his best not to think of the prophecy; unfortunately, the more he tried not to think of it, the more he ended up actually thinking about it.

The books that Tonks had given him had helped a bit. One book was on physical fitness and had several exercises he could do in his room. The other book was on Yoga, he had almost thought it was a Tonks' form of a joke until he read the note on it. Tonks said that she had begun using it during her fifth year to help with the stress of O.W.L.s and that it had helped her a lot. She also wrote that she still used it to help calm her and relax, and that the increase flexibility helped in her dueling. Harry flipped through the book and mentally laughed at the thought of Tonks being coordinated enough to do Yoga. She was always tripping over things, falling, and generally being a klutz, but then he began to remember that night at the Ministry, Tonks had been fighting and avoiding curses while on stairs and uneven ground. The Tonks that night was not the Tonks he remembered from the summer or Christmas. That alone was enough to make Harry take it seriously.

Harry found that Yoga was actually pretty easy, at least the basics, he figured that all the time spent in his small cupboard growing up and escaping Dudley had left him with a great sense of his body. He wasn't sure what he thought of about it yet, though. On one hand he could see how it helped him relax his body and control his temper, but on the other hand it left his mind open and he ended up spending a lot of time thinking about Sirius and the prophecy which ended up canceling out any of the relaxation. Because of that, Harry found himself spending more time working on his physical training and doing the exercises from that book. By the third day, he was finding that he had muscles he never knew even existed before. Unfortunately, this was because he was sorer than he had ever been before in his life. The book had warned about doing too much too soon, but with not being able to go outside, Harry had spent most of his days working out or doing Yoga. Now, however, he was paying for it.

Harry tried and failed to stifle his groan as he got out of bed to get the message from the owl before it woke his Aunt and Uncle. He didn't recognize the owl and was hoping it was from the Order telling him he could go outside again. Unfortunately the owl, surprisingly, turned out to be from Ginny Weasley. He had never received and owl from her before, so read the letter quickly, in case it was important.

Dear Harry,

This is one of Fred and George's owls from their shop; they needed an extra hand at Wheezes, so I offered to work down in Diagon Alley with them. I know you are probably wondering why I'm writing to you. I just thought you might need another friend or at least someone else to write to. If I know Ron, he's probably been telling you about the Cannons and complaining about Hermione. And if I know Hermione, she has probably been trying to console you, pry out whatever you don't want to talk about, and complain about Ron or N.E.W.T.s. Pig's been so busy lately running letters that I haven't had a chance to write you before now. Errol is worse than he used to be now. Mum and Dad aren't even using him anymore. They said they're going to get another one, but I think dad is pretty attached to Errol; he's had him since his first year of Hogwarts.

I'm not sure what all Ron has been telling you, so I'll fill you in about the family. We're all at the Burrow, though I'm sure you knew that already. Percy came home a few days ago begging for forgiveness; most of us wouldn't talk to him, but Mum was really happy he came back. I'm not sure I can forgive him, but I miss him so much I started talking to him before he left. Ron, Fred and George still haven't. Fred and George are still living here, even though they are thinking about moving into the shop - Mum wants them to stay at home though.

Hermione is back at her parent's house. Dumbledore put up a lot of wards around it over the year, so she and her family should be safe. She and her parents are going on vacation next month. She may be inviting my git of a brother - though if he keeps acting up, I don't think she will, or at least that's what she threatened to get him to start behaving. She's making a huge deal out of all the last minute details. I think it's more the fact that she wasn't prepared for it that is bugging her the most, you know how she likes to be prepared and in control of everything. I still can't believe those two got together... I never thought Ron would have the courage to ask her on a date! And as smart as Hermione is I didn't think she would actually say yes to him. I mean Ron... Ug, even the thought is too disgusting to think about.

I hope the Muggles are treating you well, or at least not giving you a hard time. If not, let me know and I'll send you a care package from Fred and George. I tried to find out how you were doing but I couldn't get anything out of Mum or Dad. Mum has been going nutters worrying about you; she's been cooking up enough for an army and cleaning even more than before. I wasn't sure why until I saw Tonks at the store yesterday, she let me know a little of what was going on. Mum is right mad at her for leaving her post like that, but I can't believe they won't even let you out of the house. It's supposed to be only temporary but if it's not... We'll get you out of there someway or another. I'm not going to ask if you're okay. I know I'm not. But could you write something to let us know how you are? We're all worried about you.

Ginny

When he received the letter from the Order a few days ago, Harry had a letter from Tonks to help curb his anger. This time there was no other letter to help. As he sat staring at the letter, his mind worked overtime, his anger increasing with every moment. He couldn't believe they hadn't told him! It was bad enough that they got together just after his godfather died and he was sent back here but to not tell him. Actually he realized that they hadn't even bothered to write to him at all! Not even a single letter when they said they would as often as possible! And now they were going away on vacation together! Were they happy to have him out of the way so that they could be on there own? Did they even care that he was stuck here alone? Had they just gotten together or had they just been keeping it secret from him? After all, going away on vacation together after only dating for a week or so wasn't exactly normal. At King's Cross, they said they would see him soon - what had happened? Did they blame him for getting hurt at the Ministry of Magic? Had they been betraying him all along?

Harry tried to work out and do Yoga to help calm him but nothing was working. The only thing he could think of was their betrayal. They were the two most important people in his lives and they had done this to him! All this combined with not being able to go outside and having heard nothing from the Order as to when he would be able to leave sent him over the edge. In short order, his room was a disaster; his chair broken, his bed flipped against the wall, and Dudley's broken toys shattered and laying haphazardly throughout the room. The only thing left untouched was his school trunk; he opened his trunk to destroy it, to erase every memory of Ron and Hermione when he was stopped cold. There, lying on top of his school items was his Firebolt.

His Firebolt... Sirius had given it to him, his first present from him. He grabbed and brought it to his body holding on to it as if it was his only lifeline. He slid to the floor next to his bed as memories wracked his body, Sirius, Ron, Hermione, The Prophecy, The Veil, Bellatrix, the Cruciatus curse...

He wasn't sure how long he sat there as the memories replayed over and over in his mind but eventually he began to feel completely drained; his life, his emotions, his body, and his soul. It was all just too much.