Pulling Him Up

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CHAPTER EIGHT: HALLUCINATIONS
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Draco's hand stopped moving as the owner started to stare again at the raven-haired wizard who read quietly in one corner of the room. He would never get bored studying Harry. Peculiarly, the emerald-eyed Gryffindor exuded some kind of calming power and Draco rarely flared in the past three days.

It could be that I have run out of energy, Draco mused. He saw Harry's hand moving and all thoughts froze in his mind. His eyes loyally followed the graceful movement. The hand swept up to let fingers drive into the thick, black mane.

His thoughts were allowed to run free when Harry settled down to read again. As usual, Draco tried to analyze his behavior. Why had he allowed Harry to get close to him? They had been enemies. Harry did not have to be so nice to him, just because they had a truce. However, there he was, reading a book in companionable silence.

"Why?" Draco unwittingly asked the question aloud.

"Hmmmm?" Harry responded in a preoccupied tone. His glasses slipped down the bridge of his handsome nose and Draco gulped as dreamy green eyes gazed at him.

"I don't understand why you volunteered to keep me company," Draco mumbled.

"I don't either." Harry smiled at him.

"But why? You hate me!" Draco insisted stubbornly.

"I used to hate you, Draco. But after S-Sirius' death ... well, I just felt numb." Harry's eyes turned sorrowful. "Maybe, I'll tell you why later. Once I understand why."

Draco was not satisfied with Harry's reply but he could not do anything about it. He sighed and turned his attention back to the notes on the desk. He heard Harry yawn and looked again at his schoolmate.

"Merlin. I don't understand how you can look so energetic and write an essay when it's almost midnight."

"I did wake up late today," Draco reminded him.

"Huh." Harry yawned again.

There was a soft rap on the door, and Severus entered. It was time for a shift change.

"I'm going to get some sleep. I'll see you in the morning," Harry said as he rose from his seat. "Good night." The Gryffindor waved at him and nodded at Severus. Draco watched as Severus followed Harry with moody black eyes, and he felt guilty all of a sudden. Although it would be uncharacteristic and ridiculous to think that the Potions Master was feeling wistful, Draco knew it was true. With Severus taking care of him during the night and Harry taking care of him during the day, the two rarely found the time to talk to each other. He was able to glean that much from Severus, that Harry and the greasy-haired wizard used to spend hours talking to each other.

"So, Severus. Care to explain why I'm writing the protocol of how to brew a sleeping draft potion?" Draco asked conversationally.

"Were you busy with something?" Severus shot him a sardonic look.

"Well, no," Draco admitted and started writing. "I haven't eaten any forms of desserts for the past three days. The vanilla ice cream was the last sweet thing I had tasted. Why?"

"Because I told the house-elves not to send any sweets or the like to you." Severus gave him an evil smirk.

"I suppose you have a valid reason for doing so," Draco said calmly. He was going to follow Harry's advice, about not adding worries to the Potions Master.

Severus looked at him with his right eyebrow elegantly raised. "Yes. In fact, I do." Severus undid the clasps of his robes before letting them fall from his shoulders. Then he quickly folded it and draped it over the back of his armchair.

Draco dropped his eyes to his parchment and quite unexpectedly, he yawned. He blushed slightly and looked guiltily at Severus.

"It's almost midnight, Draco. You should go to bed now," Severus said in a serious tone.

"But I'm not done yet." Draco waved his parchment in emphasis.

"I don't expect you to be me, to stay up all night," Severus snorted.

His eyes grew heavier and he placed his quill down. Draco resisted the urge to rub his eyes. "Are you sure?"

"Go to bed."

"Why don't you sleep as well?"

"I'll take a nap later."

Severus looked at him peculiarly but Draco maintained his silence and simply tidied the things on the small desk. The moment he left the spot for his bed, Severus came to replace him. His eyes never left the older wizard even as he prepared for bed.

Draco sighed softly in relief. Severus had brought something to work on, which meant Severus would not watch him while he slept. Draco did not really mind the attention, but he had rather not have his sleep induced by any kinds of dreams.

Candles that brightened the room vanished, except for one that burned on the small desk.

"Sleep well," Severus murmured as Draco slipped under the covers.

"Good night, Severus." Draco gazed at the ceiling while he tried to make a decision whether he should lie on his right or his left. It felt slightly uncomfortable if he gave his back to Severus, but so would he if he faced him.

At last, Draco closed his eyes. He allowed his thoughts to slow and when they quieted, sleep blanketed his mind and he fell to slumber. His body relaxed and in his sleep, he turned to be on the most comfortable of positions - he turned to his left.

Severus had resumed teaching classes for a reason. He had thought that it was the best way to keep his mind busy, and to distract himself from the confusing emotions deep inside him. Therefore, he had brought with him a stack of that day's essays. However, the task was not infinite, and after three hours of steady working behind the desk, he was done.

With a small frown, Severus gathered the papers and rolled them carefully into a neat bundle. Then he secured the roll with a simple binding spell and left it on the table.

Severus blew out the candle and got up from his seat, the chair creaking softly as the weight vanished from it. He made his way to Draco's bed without any difficulty and sat cautiously on the edge of it.

The slight shifting of the bed caused Draco to turn fully on his side and his left hand came to rest against Severus' knee. Severus brushed pale gold strands away from Draco's face, all the while trying not to focus on how troubled his heart felt. His fingers strayed and ghosted over Draco's pale eyebrows and broad forehead. Resignation filled him then. He could not bring himself to show his affections during broad daylight, but this way, it might be less embarrassing for him and easier for him to live with. That is not true, Severus thought darkly.

Harry's face flashed in his mind and he pulled his fingers away. They curled into fists and Severus swore silently. He cursed himself for being weak, for allowing them to get close to him. Then he cursed himself, for letting his emotions go out of control. Then after five seconds, he wished he did not feel as though he had betrayed them.

"You are not mine," Severus muttered angrily to himself.

He transferred himself to the divan that had been moved to the foot of Draco's bed. He sat there with his head bowed and covered his face with his hands. It had been a long time since he had felt this torn and anxious within himself.

It was not right to harbor strong feelings for Harry and Draco. Wasn't it? They were still students of Hogwarts and he still had authority over them as their teacher. Furthermore, they were nearly twice as young as he was. Severus snorted derisively. I am mad for wanting them both.

Severus could not understand why he wanted them to know. He had spent almost half of his life being a rather heartless Potions Master who did not understand what the word 'compassion' meant. Why was he changing now? Why was he almost craving for attention? Why was he generously giving them that? He swallowed around the lump in his throat.

Get a hold of yourself, Severus. You're an adult. There are other important things to think about rather than try to sort out your emotions. He took a deep breath and glanced at the bed.

Ever since Harry started helping out, Draco appeared mostly normal. Screams or whimpers had not awakened Severus, and although a part of him was rejoiced, a larger part of him had become more cautious and suspicious.

It's just too sudden. Too miraculous. Severus fretted a bit more.

A soft whimper coming from the bed reached his ears.

Draco froze. His brain yelled at him to run but his body could not carry out the command. Three Death Eaters surrounded him. Although the white masks covered their faces, he knew that his father was not one of them.

He tried to scream when he found himself lying face down on a rough surface. He tried to cry when something breached his body. He tried to wake when the whispers began.

No...

The whispers filled his ears and invaded his mind.

Someone ... please.

He did not feel the pain even when teeth had bitten his neck hard.

Help...

Help...

He could not wake.

"Draco..." Severus shook Draco's shoulders with violently trembling hands. He paused and looked into Draco's impossibly wide eyes. They seemed as though they were frozen. And dead. He shuddered.

"Draco, snap out of it."

"Severus. What has happened?"

"I'm not sure, Headmaster. He must have had a nightmare," he replied quickly. "But he's not responding to me."

"Step aside, Severus," Dumbledore ordered. "Let me examine him."

He was being moved. Draco was only partly aware that he was sitting up. Then someone moved in front of him. Draco stared into blue eyes blankly. He blinked, and gasped in terror.

The pair of blue eyes was looking at him with evil intent.

'Let's put your mouth into good use, beautiful one,' whispered a voice.

"No..." He whimpered and inched away from the wizard.

The masked wizard reached out for him.

"NO!"

They were all surprised when Draco stared at Dumbledore as though the old wizard was a stranger. Severus grew alarmed when he saw the terrified look in Draco's eyes.

"Draco, we're here to help," Dumbledore said in a gentle voice. However, that did not calm Draco. He grew agitated instead and shouted. Then quick as lightning, Draco pushed Dumbledore away and the old wizard fell to the floor with a surprised oath.

"Draco!" Severus shouted the teenager's name when the latter bolted out from bed and grabbed his wand. Draco pointed the wand at Madam Pomfrey and fired off a spell. The nurse collapsed against the desk and unconscious, she slid to the floor.

Gods. Severus understood the crazed look well. Draco could not recognize them. However, Draco was not acting like when Severus had first found him. The young Slytherin looked at Dumbledore and Madam Pomfrey as though they were the enemies.

Merlin. He's hallucinating! Severus thought in alarm.

Draco suddenly ran off.

"DRACO!"

He could run. Draco let his legs take him away from the wizards. His eyes darted from his left to his right but he had no recollection of the place.

Where am I going?

When the question arose in his mind, his eyes focused on a parapet. If I jump, no one will know. No one will know. Draco skidded along the corridor and headed for the parapet. If I die, they will never get me again. I'll be free.

Harry did not know why he was walking out in the corridors in the unholy hours of early morning. He remembered that he had been awakened by something - his dreams or Ron's snores. It did not make sense to him, however. Why had he not gone to sleep after that?

With his mind still foggy with sleepiness, he climbed up the staircase, conveniently forgetting that he would cost Gryffindor five points if anyone found him wandering around the castle when he was not supposed to.

He was about to make a right turn when he saw a figure running toward him at a very fast speed. Before his mind could formulate a question, his eyes noticed pale blonde hair flying in the wind, blank gray eyes, an aristocratic chin, and a Slytherin wearing only pyjamas.

Stunned, Harry watched as Draco skidded along the path. Then the Slytherin was off again, toward a dead end. Harry's throat went dry and his heart started to pound heavily in his chest.

Not a dead end.

Slowly, he started to run as well.

Draco.

Something started to scream inside him.

Draco scrambled up the parapet.

He could not breathe.

Draco had finally managed to get up onto the low wall and he was trying to stand on unsteady feet.

"Draco." His voice did not work. "Draco."

Green eyes looked on with fear and desperation. Harry reached out for Draco, to try to pull him back to safer ground.

"They won't know if I jump. It won't matter anymore," he heard Draco whisper.

"DRACO! DON'T!"

Severus' shout gave Harry the strength to run faster, but it had also caused Draco to jump in surprise.

"Draco!" Harry yelled when he saw Draco's eyes flickering with something akin to awareness. He saw them glowing with fear and alarm.

"Harry!" And Draco slipped.

Bright green tendrils shot out from Harry's palm and as Harry concentrated on them to wrap around Draco, his other hand grabbed hold of the parapet. However, Draco's weight pulled him over the edge. They would be instant goners had Harry not managed to grab the edge of the palisade. The suddenness of it all was too much for his just-healed shoulder to bear and he let out a hiss of agony.

Before he could cry out for help, magical ropes twined around his wrist, down around his arm, to his shoulder, and his torso. He lifted his head weakly, just in time to see Severus, his face a deathly pale color, leaning forward to grab at his hand.

The arduous task of getting him and Draco up seemed to take forever.

His legs seemed wobbly and he sank to the floor with Draco, who had fainted when he had fallen off the parapet. Harry leaned back against the low wall and tried to catch his breath.

"You stupid fool," someone muttered hoarsely.

Harry opened his eyes in tired bewilderment and gasped in astonishment to find Severus sweeping down on him. "Seve..." He coughed, suddenly short of breath.

"You stupid fool," Severus whispered in his ear. "Stupid, foolish Gryffindor." The Potions Master's arms wrapped tightly around him. "You stupid fool."

We're all right, Severus.

A distant part of him was wondering why Severus was the only one who had come to help. Where's Dumbledore? I know that Severus would inform him if anything happens.

Severus knew he should let go of Harry but after being frightened mostly out of his wits, he simply had no energy to make his arms comply. "Bloody reckless fool." For some reason, he could not think of something more creative to say.

"Severus, I'm all right. We are all fine. Okay?" Harry murmured soothingly into his hair.

"What were you thinking? You nearly killed yourselves..."

"I think that may be the problem, Severus. I wasn't. I was still half-asleep when I saw Draco running. Not all my wheels were functioning." There was a long pause. "Thank you, Severus."

They were all right. Severus repeated that to himself many times in his head. You are all right. He felt Harry moving, and stilled himself when Harry kissed his shoulder. Warmth returned to his body and chased away the coldness of fright. Finally, Severus was able to move. He pulled away slightly and looked at Harry. The black-haired Gryffindor appeared slightly flushed and bashful.

Severus felt his own cheeks coloring with embarrassment but he did not remove his right arm from Harry's shoulders. He dropped his gaze to the wizard lying on Harry's thighs. Severus stroked Draco's cheek gently before letting his fingers run into tangled silver hair to smooth it. He looked at again at Harry and simply stared into understanding emerald eyes.

Draco stirred, and he frowned slightly at the unfamiliar sensation. Was someone holding him? The arms felt strong, and Draco was comfortable. However, what was more important was that he felt protected and safe. Who? Draco wondered. His eyes fluttered slightly but they did not open. Someone was stroking his hair, but it did not feel like it was done by the same person.

Those fingers started to caress his face and he opened his eyes immediately. He was not wrong. The fingers and the touch belonged to Severus.

Then who?

Harry's image flashed in his mind and he craned his neck up.

Harry.

He drank in the affectionate way Harry's eyes looked at him. Affectionate?

"Hey," Harry said softly.

Draco blinked his eyes in confusion. What happened? He turned his attention inward and tried to remember what had occurred.

Oh. He had a nightmare. Draco blinked his eyes slowly. There were brief flashes of him pushing Dumbledore, hexing Madam Pomfrey, of him running and then...

"No..." He remembered the terrified look on Harry's face.

"It's all right, Draco," Harry murmured. "It's all right."

He had tried to jump off the parapet. Severus' voice had brought him back to his senses but he was so startled that he had lost his footing. He recalled staring at Harry, remembered calling the Gryffindor's name just as he started to fall. His lips began to tremble.

"It's all right, Draco," Severus echoed Harry's words gently.

No. It's not all right. Not all right... Through blurred eyes, he watched Harry and then Severus. Hot tears spilled from his eyes and he whimpered. "It's not all right ... I nearly killed you. How can you say it's all right?"

"Shhhh."

Draco found himself being lifted to a sitting position and he cried into Harry's neck. "I nearly killed you, Harry." How was he going to live with that knowledge? Harry meant as much to him as Severus.

It hurts ... so much.

"We're here, Draco. We're here."

He felt Severus wrapping his arms around his body. He felt safe. Still, he cried, and he cried, until exhaustion took over and he fell into a dreamless sleep.

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To Be Continued On Chapter Nine