Love in the Time of Carnaval

'I had a damned hard time trying to get the school's permission to come on this little jaunt,' revealed Regulus as he mangled his salmon steak. 'Final year and all that. Mere had to fairly plead with the governors. Think she said it would be necessary to my career with the foreign office. Practice my frog and whatnot. She's a sweet old cow, really, Mother.'
Rodolphus viewed Regulus with barely-veiled disgust. 'What an ambitious cousin you have, Bellatrix. Already has his future planned.'
'Would we were all so fortunate,' piped Nott, as a house elf refilled his glass. 'I suppose this is our last hurrah together as children. Soon we shall have to start over as adults.'
'What will you do, Theodore?' Bertha Jorkins asked with interest.
Rodolphus answered for him. 'Nott shall, like myself, enter that shadowy world of our fathers--finance.'
Nott winced. 'Oh, that word.'
Rodolphus smiled rakishly, warming to his subject. 'Yes, while Nott and I walk to the patrilineal halls of power, the rest of you will no doubt be consigned to penury.' His eyes flicked to Bellatrix. 'With exceptions. Though I suppose, Rabastan, you could always take holy orders.' Here Rodolphus crossed himself. 'Get thee to a monastery, yes, Brother Rabastan?'

Rabastan squirmed in his black and utilitarian robes. Snape could certainly see some narrow-minded fervor waiting to burn in those dark and thoughtless eyes. In fact, Rabastan seemed cut from the very cloth of those grim and distrustful little men who terrified their congregations with hellfire and social ridicule in days gone by. Probably a flagellant, too.
'Don't be an ass,' growled Rabastan, blushing furiously.
Bertha Jorkins volunteered, 'I should like to start my own scandal sheet someday, but I suppose I'll just get some job like Mother's in the Ministry. Weekends off sort of thing.
'How 'bout you, Bella?' Regulus asked. 'Should we expect to find you covered in grease and working in a chip shop?'

Bellatrix looked up dreamily from her plate. 'No, I am going to be someone's muse.'
'Not some damned painters, I hope!' began Regulus, but Rodolphus hushed him.
'Go on, Bellatrix.'
Bellatrix closed her eyes. 'I will find someone, a man, I think. A great man. And I will be his inspiration, his guiding light. I will give life to his work, and he will give me...' She broke off and shyly looked at the clock.
And for Severus, it was as if he had seen her for the first time.

'I believe,' quipped Nott, 'that money would be the other commodity in that sort of arrangement.'
'Bastard,' laughed Bellatrix, and for a few moments, the table was taken by a fit of the giggles.
'Hang on,' complained Rodolphus, interrupting the revels, 'Severus hasn't told us what he's going to do.'
'Oh, I know that,' smirked Bertha. 'I eavesdropped when he was getting his career advice back at school.' She paused to drink some more wine. 'Severus is going to be an Auror.'
From across the table, Snape felt Nott's eyes upon him.
'Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?'

As Snape climbed the carpeted stairs to his rooms, Rabastan hailed him and asked him into the library for a quick word. Snape chose for himself a comfortable antique armchair while Rabastan paced.
'I'm no good with words, you know. But I feel I must tell someone. And I think that you--' Here Rabastan stopped and turned to face Severus. '--would understand me.'
'I'm listening.'
'I'm...I've...I think I've fallen in love.'
'There's that word again.'
'Sorry?'
'Never mind. Is there something to drink in here?'
Rabastan gestured towards a small bar and continued his story.
'I'm the second son. I know that. But I'm still rich. Frightfully rich, really.'
'How difficult for you.'
'And I know I'm not as handsome or clever as Rodolphus. But I'm not unattractive, damn it. In fact, some people find me quite lovable.'
Upon this point Snape did not speculate, but drank instead.
'I think I would make a good catch. And it would be good for our families as well. The Blacks are almost as well-established as the Lestranges. At least in England. They may even be ahead of us.'
Now Rabastan had Snape's full attention. 'Go on.'
'So from that angle I can't see any objections. But I'm not sure how to proceed. I'm such an ox at these things. I've tried writing a poem--care to hear it?'
'I would be delighted.'
Rabastan pulled a small parchment from his robes and read in his best sermon voice.

There comes a point in the life of man
when he realises he needs a friend

Rabstan took great care to make the ends of each line rhyme, no matter how disturbed the pronunciation.

And I would give my gold, my soul
if that friend would be you.
Your long black hair is shiny
like the youths of Araby
and your eyes sparkle like gems
with the depth of the River Thames.
Of your lips I daren't speak
for to mention dreams I think indiscreet,
but none will love you better
than I and it's forever.

Snape was too stunned to speak.
'What do you think?'
Snape finished his drink. 'With words like those, how can Bellatrix help but love you?'
'Bellatrix? What do you mean? I was--'
In an instant both their minds experienced confusion followed immediately by a horrifying sense of realisation. This would be a moment to forget.
'Yes. Of course. Bellatrix. I love her a lot. Well, awful long day, best get to bed.' Rabastan shook Snape's hand ridiculously and hurried from the room.

Minutes later Snape was asking himself just how he had gotten mixed up in this madness when, upon opening the door to his room, he was greeted by the sight of Bertha Jorkins lying naked in his bed.
'Hello, Severus.' She let the sheet slip, exposing her large breasts.
Snape sat down at the edge of the bed and lightly grabbed her ankle. 'Bertha,' he yawned, 'why are you in my bed?'
'I was lonely. Don't you find me attractive?'
He flung her leg over and sat down in the spot it had recently occupied.
Snape thought. 'Yes, in a cheap sort of way.'
Bertha was almost hurt but decided it was better than nothing. 'Well, get in!' she laughed.
Severus looked at the window. Absently he rubbed his hand along her calf. 'Rabastan just spoke to me in the library.'
'Really? Did he tell you he's a nancy boy and loves Regulus? Poor old poof.'
'Yes. I think he believed I was queer as well. Where would be get an idea like that, Bertha?'
'I told him you were.'
'And why would you do that?'
'Make him feel better? Actually, I hoped we could all three get together tonight.' She clutched at Snape's robes, but he pinned her wrist.
'Not tonight, Bertha. I'm thinking. Try Nott. He's two doors down on the left.' He rolled her out of the bed and onto the floor.
'Filth. Oily, greasy eunuch,' Bertha hissed as Severus pushed her from the room. He went to check on the Draught of Lethe in his study. Soon it would be ready. But would Rodolphus have succeeded by then?

That night Snape dreamt that there was someone in bed with him. He ran his hands over her thin, naked body, tasting her pale skin and running his fingers through her hair as she laughed that high, pure laugh and fought playfully against him as he made love to her. When he woke, he know he was absolutely alone.