Ebb and Flow

Hogwarts, End of Term Feast, June 1976

***

Althea looked out across the calm water as one of the giant squid's tentacles lazily peaked above the lake's surface. The next morning, she would leave to spend her summer holiday with her Gran--she wrinkled her nose at the thought. Sirius would leave Hogwarts, as well, to return to a home life he would rather avoid. To think, we could've spent some of our summer together, she thought, pulling her knees to her chest. She hoped that the brief holiday would help to dampen the feelings in her heart. She was so sure Sirius would hex her after she rejected him that night on the Hogwarts roof, but he had not. The coldness between them was worse than any hex he could ever inflict upon her.

Althea rested her chin upon her crossed arms. He asked her to Hogsmeade in front of me, she thought, feeling her lower lip tremble. She wiped her eyes with the heel of her hand as she remembered her talk with James. I've ruined everything, she thought and closed her eyes to halt the tears forming. I threw away my chance.

A large paw nudged Althea's arm. Her friend had returned. Althea smiled through her tears as she looked upon the dog that was complicit in Sirius's ban from Madam Puddifoot's tearoom.

"Hello," she murmured and kissed his snout. "I've needed you," she said, resting her cheek against his head.

Snuffles whined at which Althea held him tightly to her.

"Please, don't." Althea frowned as she smelled something familiar--a scent she found pleasant. "One of us has to be happy."

I wonder if Gran would allow me to keep him, she thought as she scratched Snuffles behind his ears. Snuffles's tail wagged happily. She'd have to prefer it to an owl.

"I reckon you can sleep in my bed tonight," she said and noticed that Snuffles had become quite still. "What a shock for Jane...and for Gran!"

Althea gave Snuffles a vigorous scratch and threw herself against the warm grass. A two ravens flew overhead and Althea sighed mournfully. It's strange how my feelings towards him have changed, she thought, looking to the small black tattoo of a bird upon her wrist. Little by little, I saw him for who he truly was and not that arrogant bastard I thought him to be...but I've hurt him. Her eyes widened slightly--she had hurt him more than any hex or curse she could cast would ever hurt him.

"I've been a complete fool and I can't mend it," she said and groaned, covering her face with her hands. "What have I done?"

"Althea?"

Althea's eyes snapped open, and she turned her head to see Sirius--very pale--sitting next to her where Snuffles had been.

Althea sat up and looked around her for her companion, but he was nowhere to be seen. "Where--"

"I reckon I should apologize for my behavior towards Meadows," he said, looking to the space of grass between them. "There was this rat and--"

"I know."

"You know?"

Althea nodded. "You exploded the cherubs."

"I had to," he said with a faint smile. "The rat it--"

"Sprouted a pair of tiny wings," she finished, "and now you're forever banned."

"Unfortunately," he said with mock regret.

"Indeed."

Sirius swallowed. "James is waiting for me," he said and went to stand. "Have a good holiday--"

"Wait," she said, grasping his hand. "Wait, please."

"Althea, I--"

Now was her moment. She furrowed her brow and Sirius, witnessing her distress, returned to the grass. Althea raised her hand to Sirius's face and brushed the locks of hair that had fallen into his eyes. The corner of her mouth upturned when she saw his cheeks turn a pale shade of pink. Sirius Black wrote those letters for her. Letters, which detailed his most intimate thoughts about her and his hopes for them as a couple. He risked expulsion just to kiss her. He would risk being disowned just to date her.

"I do feel the same way."

It took a moment for Sirius to recognize what she had said, but a small smile crept across his handsome face. "You do?"

Althea nodded.

Sirius grinned and slowly ran his hand to the back of her neck, pulling her forward. She closed her eyes, her heart almost leaping out of her chest, as he placed his parted lips against hers. Leisurely, she ran her fingers up his chest, feeling his heart beating just as fast and just as strong as hers. She slowly pulled away from him, gently licking her lips, and rested her forehead against his. How I could have ever thought of sacrificing this, she wondered as she gazed into Sirius's eyes. She smiled as a breeze caught a few strands of his hair, sweeping them into his grey eyes.

She frowned slightly at the spicy scent of Sirius' soap. She leaned close and sniffed his neck.

Sirius laughed. "What are you doing?"

Althea continued to sniff him. "I'd just--I thought I--"

Sirius gently pulled her away from him and smiled at her thoughtfully. "Oh, don't frown," he said. "I reckon you should know."

Althea raised an eyebrow. "Know what?"

Sirius cleared his throat. He clasped her hands and looked solemnly into her eyes as he spoke, "Promise me, you'll never tell anyone what I'm about to show you."

A small knot developed in Althea's stomach. "I won't. What is it?"

Sirius sat up and surveyed the area. "Right."

Before her eyes, Sirius gradually transformed into his Animagus form. Althea gasped in humorous disbelief as there sitting before her was the large black dog that entertained the girls on many evenings.

"You--you're that dog!"

Sirius barked happily and wagged his tail. This is absolutely absurd, she thought and placed her hand over her mouth in an attempt to stifle her laughter. Althea thought to the incident in Madam Puddifoot's and roared with laughter.

"I don't believe this," she breathed, reaching for Sirius' snout. "You're Snuffles."

Sirius panted happily.

Althea fiercely blushed at the thought she almost let Sirius sleep in her bed. Her amusement transformed into embarrassment.

"Sirius, that's a terrible thing to do--eavesdrop on our conversations," she admonished as Sirius returned to his human form. "I said--oh bloody hell!"

"I only paid attention when you talked about me," he explained, taking her hands in his--he gently squeezed them. "Thank you, for defending that I don't have fleas," he added and winked.

Althea's mouth dropped open. "I let you rest your head in my lap!"

"I'm sorry, Althea. It was the only way I could be near you," he said, resting his hands on her shoulders. "It will never happen again," he added and kissed her cheek. "I promise."

"Good," she said, attempting to hide a smile. "The things you heard."

"Indeed," he said and laughed to himself. "I almost transformed in front of you the evening you said that you wished me to be the letter writer."

"It would've been awful if you did," she said and gasped. "Oh, and what you did to poor Jane!"

"She never showed me a bit of kindness," he said, the corner of his mouth upturned, "unlike you. What was I to do? She raised her wand at me in that ghastly place. You would never think of harming such a loveable stray."

Althea frowned slightly.

"It was James's idea--the rat," he whispered. "He couldn't let me suffer."

"Of course, not."

Sirius sighed happily. "This is unreal."

"It is a bit strange," she replied and smiled. "Last year, I was planning ways to avoid you and now--"

"Will you meet me later?" he asked, gently stroking her cheek with his thumb.

"Later?"

"Yeah," he replied, smiling eagerly. "A walk by the lake? I promise I won't throw rocks at the giant squid."

Althea laughed quietly. "You haven't done that since we were eleven," she replied as Sirius smoothed loose strands of hair away from her face. "I would like that though--a walk."

Sirius's grin broadened. "Brilliant," he replied happily and kissed her lips. "Midnight, then?"

"Midnight?"

"Eleven-thirty?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No, midnight's fine," she answered, smiling weakly. "I'll meet you in the common room, then?"

"No, no," he replied, shaking his head. "Meet me on the fourth floor next to the suit of armor missing its sword."

"Right," she breathed, memorizing where he told her to meet. "It's is very late. I think my friends are wondering where I am."

"Right," he sighed with disappointment, "I suppose we should return."

"Please, don't be cross," she said and kissed his cheek.

"I'm not cross. I'm looking forward to the feast," he said as he stood. He smiled mischievously and he held out his hands. "I reckon we should arrive together--it'll be a great shock--"

"That isn't a good idea," she said as she stood. "Jane--"

Sirius clasped her hand. "I hadn't thought of that. Jane wouldn't take us too well," he replied thoughtfully, and ran his fingers through his hair. "I hadn't realized she fancied me."

Althea let out a laugh of surprise. "How could you not?" she remarked, looking into his eyes. "She sits behind you in almost every class and she sat behind you in every O.W.L exam."

Sirius frowned as he attempted to remember where he sat during his O.W.L exams.

"You honestly didn't know, did you?"

"No," he replied, frowning. "I reckoned the gasps and squeaks in Divination were normal."

"Sometimes," she blurted out and gasped.

Sirius chuckled quietly. "Any rich wizard will do," he said and pulled a face. "And any girl that would settle for my idiot brother--"

Althea stuck out her tongue.

"Exactly," he said and sighed with mild disappointment. "I suppose we won't tell anyone about us."

"Not yet at least," she said and bit her lip.

***

Althea felt uncomfortable as she sat across from Jane, who was chatting merrily with Lily. Sirius had sat across from Althea, next to Jane, much to the delight of Jane and much to the dismay of Althea. Jane, of course, was overly enthusiastic that Sirius had chosen to sit next to her--and to Althea--must have taken it as a sign of their future shared destiny. Althea, on the other hand, felt increasingly guilty--especially after she kicked Jane underneath the table to keep from her making a complete fool of herself.

Althea pushed her peas with her fork, and wondered how she could keep a secret that large from Jane and Lily. It's not as if we're getting married or anything--we're just dating, she thought, as she pushed a few of her peas into her mashed potatoes. I also have to think of a way to meet him without their detection...tonight. Althea smiled as she folded her peas into her mashed potatoes, but quickly caught herself doing so. It was her secret. How long could the ruse last? How could she explain where she was going? The excuses of revising, Quidditch, and clubs could only work for so long. Deep inside her, the thought of keeping such a large secret excited her. It made the idea of dating Sirius even that more enticing. Althea sighed and continued to push her peas into her mashed potatoes; however, she was jarred out of her thinking by Jane who decided to talk with Sirius.

"I was thinking of getting a dog, but I'm not sure. Do you have a dog?" Jane asked Sirius.

Althea dropped her fork as Jane winked at her. She looked at Sirius and saw the corners of his mouth turn up in a smile. She knew he would play along.

Sirius rested his arms on the table. "Why, yes I do," he said, not taking his eyes off Althea. "A nice, big black one."

Althea bit her lip to hide her smile.

"Really," Jane said breathlessly and rested her chin on her hand.

"Yes, really," he replied as if everyone knew he had a dog. "It looks almost exactly like the one that's been lurking about here," he explained and took a sip of pumpkin juice.

"Fascinating," Jane replied and batted her eyes. "What's its name?"

Sirius placed his cup back on the table. "Well, I've had this dog forever, so it has one of those really childish names," he said, looking into Althea's eyes.

Oh, please don't say his name is Snuffles, she thought as Sirius winked at her.

"Oh please, tell me," Jane pleaded, leaning closer to Sirius.

Sirius sighed, not taking his eyes off Althea. "Very well, it's Snuffles," he said and winked at Althea.

Althea felt her neck warm.

Jane's eyes widened. "That's--that's the name of the dog Lily had!"

"Oh," he said and raised an eyebrow. "I didn't know. It must be a popular name."

"It must be," Lily interrupted and winked at Althea.

Althea shifted uncomfortably in her seat.

Jane turned her focus to Althea. "Did you know his dog was named Snuffles?"

Althea shifted her eyes from Jane to Sirius. Small pangs of guilt enveloped her stomach--she was not hungry anymore. How can I do this, she thought as Sirius smiled--very pleased with himself.

"No, I had no idea," she said and smiled nervously. "It must be a popular name...imagine that."

"Imagine," Lily said deliberately and raised an eyebrow.