Death Whispers

Chapter Ten - Back from the Dead

Aushou, 15th June 1980

The lab was empty and Severus slowly stirred the potion. It was a drab gray and bubbled thickly.

"Just place it on the table there," he gestured with one free hand as he heard someone enter the lab presumably with his lunch.

"Okay sir," she answered.

He spun around so fast it could have snapped his neck. Her voice still echoed softly in his head. It had been almost a year since he had seen her. That wasn't true, he still saw her in his dreams occasionally.

"You," he said, standing and walking over towards her.

He grabbed and spun her around. Sure enough it was those eyes. They were empty and lost, controlled by Imperius but he could have recognised them anywhere. She dropped her head and moved toward the door.

"Lallie," he called her name. "Stop," he commanded, grabbing her wrists and shaking them. She seemed to be fighting momentarily and then the gaze slipped back. He held her so tightly he could see her hands losing colour. Her eyes flashed with understanding and ignorance, trapped in between moments of sanity and not.

"Ah, Severus I was waiting for you," she said, looking up to him.

"How do you know my name?"

"Do you like your lunch, I will give compliments to the House-elves," she said absentmindedly and then in a deep voice. "They're dead. All of them. Murdered. Help me please," she pleaded.

"You can fight this, who's dead?" he asked, and then held his wand to her face, "Finite Incantum!" It did nothing, her eyes lolled back in her head.

"It's not abstract, not anymore," she snapped, shaking her head as tears formed in those eyes.

"What?" Severus asked confused.

"Just the lunch, now I have to go, thank you, good day, he calls," she said, formally picking up the lunch tray.

"Who?"

"My master Blair," she smiled, it looked wrong, fake, eerie.

"Wait, stop," he called as she moved toward the door.

"Evil," her eyes blazed and she spun around to face him, "it's real, it's tangible."

It held her in place for a moment and her eyes flashed a brilliant blue. He was drawn to her. But her face slackened as if suddenly remembering something and she left.

"Stop!" he ordered. "Finite Incantum!" This time when he shouted his wand snapped an electric blue. But she had already left. Severus noticed he was shaking. He don't know how she did this too him, how she made him feel so weak, he hadn't felt like this since his childhood and he hated being so out of control. He rasped as his mind spun out of control.

*****

Soon, he was furious.

A direct order, disobeyed! He stormed out, looking for Dolohov, looking for retribution for these relocated feelings.

Severus found Dolohov playing cards with other Death Eaters on the perimeter.

"What the hell?" he demanded.

Dolohov looked up from his cards smiling evilly. Severus felt his back give an involentary shiver. He held a long cigar in his hand and blew smoke towards Severus - to defy him. The others seemed to quiver under Severus' wrath even though it wasn't directed at them.

"You have disobeyed a direct order!" Severus demanded again, his young pale face flushed with colour.

Dolohov just smiled and continued playing his game. "I chose to take another option, one to take the smile from her face, permanently," he laughed.

"What? What have you done?" Severus grilled.

"It's not your job to worry about these things," Dolohov chuffed, as he took a long draw from his cigar.

"Tell me," Severus yelled, ripping the cards from the man's hands. Dolohov was mad. Dolohov stood up. The others took this as their signal to leave and fled the scene.

"I only answer to one man," he whispered, and the smoke rose from his mouth, dancing in front of his face.

"And he asked you to answer to me." The two now stood so close that Severus could taste the man's cigar.

Dolohov shrugged, "I don't see why it matters to you. She is quite a handy servant. You find that people are more willing to comply when they have nothing to fight for. Her family, friends, they are dead now, oh, how her little cousin screamed," he remembered fondly.

It sickened Severus to his stomach.

"What is wrong with you?" he demanded, drawing his wand. I'm not like this, he pleaded to himself. "You dared to disobey my orders! Crucio!"

Dolohov fell to the ground. His body twitched uncontrollably and he let out an animal's cry. Severus watched keenly as the man's cigar caught the hem of his robe on fire. The man's screams were violent, then there was laughter. It should have killed him when Severus released it. Severus turned and fled the scene. Dolohov lay on the ground gasping for air and still laughing.

****

He couldn't concentrate on his work the next couple of days. He was running on no sleep. His eyes faded in and out. Everything sounded so very far away. He was extremely tired.

"Severus," a whisper.

"Severus," a whisper.

"Wake up!"

It was definitely nightfall. He was dreaming again, he could see her face. She was smiling at him.

"Why are you smiling?" he asked stupidly.

"Because you're going to save us," she whispered, "I've seen it."

It sounded so real. He lifted his hand to her face. Her skin was soft under his sensitive fingers.

"You're awake, Severus. There is not much time," she pleaded as she took his hand in hers.

"What?" he questioned, shaking his head. Everything was still foggy. He could see the lab now coming into focus, and she was still there, her face pressed in front of him pleading.

"Listen, he'll notice me gone, you have to pay attention," she urged desperately, "You're going to save us, owl the Ministry, then get out, I will cover for you."

"What?" he was more awake now and more confused, "In case you have forgotten I'm working for the other side."

She just smiled.

"I'm a Seer. I know you'll do the right thing," she stated simply as if there was no reason to doubt it.

"I highly doubt that, there hasn't been a real Seer since the oracle herself," Severus declared, mentally confirming that she was completely insane. Maybe it was one of Dolohov's jokes trying to get back at him.

Her eyes didn't lie though. They were a gentle calm blue.

"I can guarantee you that I am, that's why Blair didn't kill me. They have been trying to get me to work for Voldemort. Of course, I refused," she quipped, her soft floaty voice taking on a hard edge.

"So you're pure blooded then? Why stand against him?" Severus asked.

She stared at him as if he had sprouted an extra head. "Why?" she asked and repeated herself, "Why?! -"

"- The man's a lunatic. You're a smart man. I can't see why you're so trapped up on the matter of blood. Even your precious 'Lord' is a half-blood," she mocked.

"You're lying," Severus hissed. "Get out."

To his surprise, she did.

*****

He saw her everywhere. Walking with the other prisoners. Delivering his meals. In his dreams.

That bitch, he thought, that manipulative bitch.

He had felt this type of anger before. It was familiar, like a welcome guest. It kept him moving, getting the job done. He even stopped badgering the guards about giving the prisoners proper meals. Hate welled inside him. A proverbial friend.

"Severus," she gasped, as she dropped his plate unceremoniously to the lab floor.

He smiled at her weakness.

"I am conducting tests," he said and focused again on the three men on the other side of the glass. They were red and raw from the 'cleaning'; he was developing new hexes again.

"You can't do this," she pleaded, grabbing his arm, more to steady herself than to shake him. She was in shock at the graphic scene before her.

"Why not?" he demanded. "They're only Muggles."

"It's wrong, it's evil." Her blue eyes were wide with fear.

"You cannot talk of things in black and white, Lallie," he spat her name like a nasty taste in his mouth. "There are grays and the lesser of two evils. Someone has to fight for the freedoms you will take for granted in our pure state. There are worse things than violence, such as having nothing worth fighting for."

"And what are these great principals of yours, what are you fighting for?" she challenged, "purity of blood? Hate? Fear?"

"As good a reason as any," Severus answered, turning back to his subjects as he cast a hex in their direction, he didn't want her to see he was unsettled. The man noticed though and his eyes grew round and pleading as he withered screaming on the other side of the glass.

"Stop, please," the man begged. Lallie shook uncontrollably beside Severus.

"You'll lose," she whispered.

He ignored her, making notes on his parchment talking to himself, "Not quick enough, still that terrible pleading."

"What are you looking for?" Lallie asked.

"For you to get out of my sight," he barked.

Lallie didn't move; she looked at the man slumped on the ground on the other side of the glass his body still convulsing in pain. Tears welled in her eyes, making her look helpless. She went to faint but Severus caught her in a reflex before she hit the ground.

Severus felt his chest tighten. He was uncomfortable and hastily dropped her. She woke with the thump on the floor pulling her legs underneath her as she edged closer to the mirror like a restless tide. The man was dead. Blood trickled from his mouth, and his face was contorted in a look of pain. The colour had already left him. Lallie whimpered before him.

"He's so small," she whispered as she put her hand to the glass, as if the man was sick instead of dead, as if loud voices would disturb him.

"Can't you see you're losing already?" she asked gently as she turned to face Severus.

He looked down at her, trying to remember feelings of hate, but they ebbed away at the sight of her tear stained cheek. She was vulnerable and exposed with her small frame hunched upon the glass. Her innocence was stabbing him.

She blinked away her tears pushing her body up from the ground using the lab table to steady herself. She continued speaking her voice soft and calm, "Hate always loses, it thinks that's it's as strong as love but it's not. Hate is based on what you don't know and are afraid of. Love exists in what you know entirely and are prepared to face. That's what makes it so powerful. True love is in its entirety, is ultimate power, for only it can conquer hate and fear."

Her words stung in Severus' mind as she turned her back, disappointed, and left the room.