Like Father, Like Son

Nineteenth Chapter

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Shocks

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"Samantha left you?" asked Sirius disbelievingly. His eyes were wide with surprise, and a suppressed grin was tugging at the corner of his mouth. "And here I was thinking that she is a perfectly sensible young girl."

"The fact that he's your son does not make him irresistible, you daft," huffed Severus, rolling his eyes towards the ceiling. "Rather to the opposite." Even though he had truly healed better than his son, he was still in the Infirmary bed next to Remy's, Sirius sitting on a chair between their beds. Although he usually quickly left the Infirmary on the rare times he even went there, this time Madam Pomfrey had decided to keep both Snapes in her not-so-evil clutches for some extra time.

"Oh, shut up," said Sirius cheerfully. Then he turned towards the teen again. "Okay, what did you do for her to leave you?"

"What, me?" exclaimed Remy. "I did nothing! She was just being an irrational and awfully stubborn bitch with no sense to listen to me!"

"Language, Son. And she wasn't that," Sirius said. "Believe me, when it is a female in question, it is always you who is at fault. No exceptions. So, what did you do?"

Remy sighed. "Well, I told her that if I got injured in the dungeons, it would have been even more dangerous to her. Then she yelled about something about being not old and sensible enough and stormed off without another word."

"So, that's it," said the Grim Animagus calmly. "You dared to question her ability to take care of herself. And that, obviously, made her less than satisfied."

"Fine. So she got angry about that. Now what can I do to get her back to her senses?" asked Remy snappishly, glaring at his carrier.

"Go and apologize to her," suggested Severus calmly. At his son's shocked expression, he sighed. "That's the only way. If she's decided that it's your fault, you will have to apologize, or you can forget her entirely."

"Sadly, I have to agree," Sirius said with a mock-sigh. "As lacking as your dear father's knowledge on girls is, it is well known that if it's the boy who's done something wrong, then he has to take the first step towards a truce of any kind."

Remy sighed. "Bloody girls," he muttered gloomily.

"Only once a month, Son," Severus said calmly, raising an eyebrow. "Only once a month. And even then only if somebody hasn't done something naughty." Giving his son a sharp glance, he then added, "You haven't done anything, have you?"

"Father!" exclaimed Remy, scandalized. "She's only thirteen, for Merlin's sake! What exactly do you take me for, a paedophile perhaps?"

"Well, age certainly didn't slow your dear carrier down when we were young," the Potions Master replied, giving his husband a sharp glance. "We were not over fourteen -- in fact, I think I was still a few weeks short of turning even that -- when he dragged me into a broom closet for the first time. Sure, it is nice to hear that you have at least some morals, but as you can see, I can't be too trustful."

"Oh, shut up," chuckled Severus. "You enjoyed it at least as much as I did, if not more." Then he said with a thoughtful voice, "You know, I think that's just the point. As far as your father was considered, Severus, you had no sex life at all until we got married, if even then. However, I know for a fact that you were thirteen when you lost your virginity. So, feel free to accuse our son of shagging everything that has legs and is not a table, but if you do that, we're not very likely to ever get any grandkids."

"Shut up, you," huffed Remy, his usually pale cheeks now coloured with an embarrassed flush. "I certainly do not need to know the details of the development of your relationship, and even less I need you to comment on my romantical relationships, or the lack thereof."

"Especially the lack thereof, you mean." Sirius grinned. "Don't worry, Son," he laughed then. "The world is full of girls, and you can just go and make your pick."

"But I don't want any of those girls," whined Remy, flipping his long ponytail over his shoulder. "I don't want Chang or Lovegood or anybody else. I only want Samantha."

"Then why don't you simply go and apologize to her?" asked Severus levelly.

"Two reasons, Father," Remy said coolly. "One: I will not go apologizing to her when I've done nothing I should apologize for. I'd lose the rest of my already wounded pride if I did that. Two: If I try to leave Infirmary again, Madam Pomfrey would kill me. She'd rather see me dying at her own hands than because of my wounds."

"It's bloody good she would," grumbled Sirius. "And if she didn't, I would. Infirmary exists for a reason, Remy, did you know that? Battle scars aren't as cool as they sound like, believe me. They make you only ugly, not cool."

"Well, thank you, my dear husband," said Severus dryly. "And here I was thinking that there was a reason beyond our son for us to be together."

"Severus, you know I didn't mean you," sighed Sirius, rolling his eyes towards the ceiling. "You could be one big scar and you'd still be just as beautiful in my eyes. I love you both regardless and because of your scars. What I meant is that if Remy's trying to catch some girl's interest, he'd have more luck without scars."

"Well, I don't want to catch some random girl's interest," said Remy. "Only Samantha's, and she wouldn't care."

"No, she wouldn't," agreed Sirius. "But at the moment she certainly does not even care about whether you're alive or not, so that's not a reason to worry."

"How'd you know anything?" asked the boy bitterly. "None of you has ever had to deal with a girlfriend or a boyfriend just leaving you. You two have been always about forever, and Remus has stayed with each of his lovers until their death."

"You're wrong," Severus said dryly. "I don't think I can even count all the girlfriends this mutt had during our school years. And he was left more often than he left."

"Oh, it was nothing serious," laughed Sirius as he saw the expression on his son's face. "Back then we hardly could come out in the open, and I had an image to uphold."

"And Father let you do that with your balls still intact?" blurted Remy before he could stop himself. Immediately, he covered his mouth with his hand, but it was too late.

"Language, Son," said Sirius good-naturedly. "I never went past kissing with those girls, anyway -- I'm gay, remember? And you are right. If I had done anything else, death would've been a merciful fate compared with what Severus would've done."

"I don't doubt that," muttered Remy, then sighed. "Could you please get Remus here? If I'm stuck here, I'd like to have somebody to talk with other than two perverted old gays who also happen to be my parents."

"Show some respect, Son," chuckled Sirius. "Very well, I'll get you somebody who can relate with your perverted interest in the females of the species."

"It is not perverted to like girls," protested Remy. "In fact, at least in the Muggle world, it's usually much more widely approved than your liking on men."

"Oh, shut up, my little homophobe." And with that, Sirius left the Hospital Wing.

*

Sirius whistled happily as he walked along the corridor. It was always so much fun to tease Remy and Severus, and it was rather easy, too. A single mention of about anything involving sex worked well to make both his son and husband uneasy in the most amusing ways. And that was exactly why he did so. He was certain the other members of their tiny family were having a hard time looking each other in the eye.

Then he turned gloomy as he thought about the reason why Remy and Severus were currently forced to stay in each other's presence. Though neither of them was currently in danger, Poppy still insisted on keeping them both in the Infirmary for observation. They still hadn't figured out what had caused them both to pass out after the monster's attack, as neither had lost that much blood, and Poppy was a tad worried. Sirius was worried, too, although he never let it show.

He'd had many bad experiences in his life, true. In Azkaban, he'd at times thought he'd go crazy. However, the moment he had stepped into that small room in the Ravenclaw Dungeons had been far worse than anything he'd ever experienced before. The moment his eyes had caught Severus's huddled form on the floor had almost killed him on the spot, as he'd been sure he had lost his husband to the awful monster. And the next thing he'd seen had been even worse, as by then his brains had registered the sight of his son lying on the floor beneath the monster, struggling for his life and slowly losing the battle. Sirius had only had the boy with him for so short time, and even less as his son. Nothing could have ever been more terrifying than the thought that he might lose his precious son and beloved husband, the two by far most important people in his life.

Even though that had indeed been a terrifying experience, it wasn't even what pained Sirius most. No, he was even more scared of the fact that he'd been unable to help, to stop that horrible destruction. His curse had done nothing to the man-monster, and only Remus had been able to save Remy from its jaws. And that, seeing that his efforts had done nothing to help his son, had made Sirius think.

All in all, what good was he to anyone? He wasn't powerful like Remus, skilled like Severus, or brilliant like Remy and Hermione. He was just a perfectly average wizard, his more-muscular-than-average body as his only advantage. Moreover, instead of the intelligence and cunning all his loved ones seemed to be blessed with, he only had the ability to fool around and run into things without thinking. True, Remy seemed to have unfortunately inherited that trait, but he had a mind that well out-powered that, and he rarely showed his foolishness. But Sirius -- what good was he to anyone? Why was Severus still with him, anyway? Because he was a good lay? Big comfort, really.

Sighing, the Grim Animagus shook his head. No, he would not go down that path. He'd often enough seen people travelling down it and only barely being saved from the ill fate that lurked in the end of it. Remus, for example.

Suddenly a horrible thought entered his mind. Remus had understandably been very upset about the monster being in essence Matthew. And he'd blamed himself for it, now had he not? And when Remus did that, it never had pretty results...

Picking up his pace, Sirius hurried on his journey to Remus's quarters. For the first time in his life he hoped that he was wrong, no, he didn't only hope that, he prayed for it. Begged for it, even. He had to be wrong, he had to. He could not be right.

However, as soon as he opened the room to his friend's quarters, the sickly sweet smell of blood immediately assaulted his oversensitive Animagus nostrils. Inwardly cursing himself for being as stupid as to allow Remus to be alone after an experience like that, Sirius bolted into the quarters. Allowing his heightened senses to guide himself, he hurried further into the werewolf's quarters.

Just like he'd feared, he found Remus lying on the floor, blood pooling around him. On the nearby desk he saw three parchment letters, all rolled up and sealed. One of them was addressed to, "Family Snape," the other to, "Kingsley," and the third to, "Harry." A bloodied knife had rolled from the limp hand to the floor. Sirius's mind registered all this in a whisker of a second, and at the next moment, he was busy chanting healing charms and searching for a pulse. To his great relief, he indeed found one, but it was weak and not too steady. Not hesitating a moment, he tore a few shreds of his shirt to bandage the still bleeding wrists -- he'd never been that good at healing -- and then, after having done everything he could, walked to the fireplace. Moments later, he had Poppy Pomfrey on his side, and the mediwitch immediately started to fuss all around Remus's unmoving form.

Sirius, however, felt oddly empty. This would be the third member of his extended family who was landed to the Infirmary for a reason that was directly or indirectly linked to the Horrid Student-Eating Monster of the Ravenclaw Tower. What would come next? Would Hermione dare into the Ravenclaw Dungeons and fall down, cracking her skull? Or maybe it wouldn't be anything involving the monster. Maybe Samantha would start her weakening -- he already knew of her Lacentria, yes -- and be forced into a bed next to Remy's, as long as she still lived, anyway?

Those were horrible thoughts. But, then again, his situation was just as horrible. He could only hope nothing worse would happen.

Like, for example, Sirius himself might get injured.

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